Enterprise
by Handy-for-the-bus
Summary: Anna is the only child of Simon and Amelia Smith, owners of a successful cotton factory. When she reaches the age of 21, they decide she's old enough to learn the family business and wed the son of Simon's most trusted business partner. However her parents plans don't go as they wish when Anna discovers that the world holds more than an arranged life. AU, begins in 1851, London
1. Chapter 1

_**A/N:**Welcome to my new multi-chapter! I'll try to update as much as I can but as you'll see these chapters will be all pretty long. I'm not used to write such long chapters but I feel the need to do it for this fic. I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I'm enjoying writing it :)_

_**Disclaimer:** Downton Abbey characters belong to Julian Fellowes._

* * *

The year of 1850 had been the coldest ever witnessed by any living man, at least that's what everyone said. Hardly a soul moved along the streets of London on that New Year's morning. Everything was snow-covered, as if paint had been thrown over the landscape.

People were dying. Starving. Freezing. They were dropping on the ground like flies. As if in rat nests filled with dirt and darkness, children cried, some because they were hungry, others because their parents lay dead beside them. All the while the main streets of London; full of splendor and lofty mansions, warmed by immense fireplaces, hid from the awful truth of the poor slums around them.

The rich emperors of a long lost empire, who during the springtime walked around green gardens hand in hand with fancy dressed women, were ignorant about this horrid reality, but then their reality was dinner parties and making sure that teawould never be after five o'clock. Both realities were real whether it was wrong or right. Men were born to be servants and masters, and it is up to God to chose which one you'll be, but sometimes, even God makes mistakes.

XXXXXX

1850 had been good for some and bad for others, and 1851 wouldn't be any different.

Anna sighed in her room while her maid helped her choose the dress to wear for the first day of the new year.

'Which one do you want, Miss?' Elsie Hughes asked, showing her a pink dress and a blue one. Both withlace, both terribly expensive.

'I really don't know Elsie. Must I go?'

'Of course you must, Miss. Your father and his friends will be waiting for you. He would be so disappointed.' Elsie gave her a pointed look.

'I know that.' She sat down on her bed looking out the window to an icy cold white that layered the streets, carriages, and homes , if you could watch it from the comfort of your room.

'Come on, Miss, you'll see your friends That's something to look forward to, isn't it?'

She looked over at her maid, wistfully. 'They are my father's friends, Elsie. Father and mother's friends. I don't have any friends of my own.'

'Oh miss, what am I then?'

Anna giggled, 'You are my mother, Elsie!'

'Don't say such thing, Miss. Your mother is...'

'You gave me your breast when Mother couldn't, didn't you?'

'I did, Miss. That I did.'

'Well then?'

XXXXXXX

'Ah, Anna my darling daughter. Come and join us!'

She did as her father told her, and soon she was surrounded by noisy men and women wanting to meet and talk to her. The blue dress had been her choice, but she was not a party kind of person, and the blue represented the colour of her soul. As her mother used to say, she was not a high society kind of girl even though she had to be. Sometimes she wished she had been born into a humble family, surrounded by brothers and sisters and parents who loved each other, instead of the unloving family she'd been born into.

People were dancing around her and drinking champagne, some inviting her to dance but she always refused.

The dining room was lit by candles giving it a golden colour. Every dress and suit of clothes shined under the lights and everyone had a glow around them. Long hair tied up in elaborate styles. Powder and scents filled the room. And Anna was bored.

'Anna,' her mother called in a low but firm voice. Grabbing her wrist with the subtlety that Mrs Smith was known for, she scolded her without giving too much away. 'You go in there and dance when the gentlemen ask you to dance. Some of those men are doing business with you father, you should show your appreciation.'

'But mother, I'm not keen to dance. I would much rath...'

'If you are going to say that you'd much rather be in your room with your nose stuck inside a book, you better think twice, young Lady. I don't want to hear that nonsense now.'

Anna remained silent giving away her guilt. Mrs Smith gave an exasperated sigh before continuing, 'See Mr Johnson's son, Charles?'

'Yes.'

'Well then, if he asks you to dance, which he will, you'll dance with him.'

Anna knew exactly what this was about. Business, or should she say, marriage.

For people like her, that was the correct term for such ceremony. It was a trade. Her hand for influence and money. She'd always known this time would come. She had been raised for this kind of bargain and she'd never thought of objecting to it. After all that's what her world was all about.

Mr Albert Johnson and his son had been a friend of the family for as long as she could remember. When she was just a little girl they would come for business dinners. They would never play or talk, but the son was familiar to her and at least she knew what he looked like. How many women had been forced to married to someone they didn't even know? Charles was a rather fetching young man, only three years older than her, with blond hair and blue eyes, much like herself. He was thin and tall and had perfect teeth. The image of a fairytale prince. Oh well, he wasn't all that bad after all.

And as her mother professed she saw him approaching her with a mischievous smile on his face.

'May I have this dance?'

She accepted his hand and he guided her through the room.

They danced two waltzes before she begged him to stop.

'I hope I didn't tire you.'

'You didn't.'

'You don't like to dance?' His eyes were kind on her.

'I do. I love to dance but...I'm not in the mood for waltzes today, I'm afraid.'

'We don't always have to enjoy ourselves.'

'Tell that to Mother.'

His smile was gentle and his eyes sparkled. She should start liking him for her own good.

XXXXXXX

Eventuallythe evening passed and to Anna's relief the party didn't extend until dinner. Before six o'clock everyone was gone and the house was silent once again.

'I think that went well.'

'It went marvelously, Amelia! Two of the vendors I wanted to do business with are going to the factory tomorrow morning so we can arrange the contracts.'

'That's wonderful, Simon!' Mrs Smith spoke, trying to look impressed, as she sat down in the chair by the fire to work on her embroidery. There was no one more predictable than her mother. From nine to midday Mrs Amelia Smith would sew, from two o'clock until five she would sew, tea time between five and six, sew until dinner and then sleep. There had been a time when Anna was a child that they would both go for a walk with the company of Elsie for an hour or so, but those times were long gone.

She was the kind of womanwho did not like change. The kind of woman who knew what she wanted. Ignorant to the world around her. Bitter due to a marriage without love and many affairs from her husband with her knowledge. Not kind, nor thankful.

'By the way, Anna? Albert spoke to me about his son. You two are going to be seeing each other more from now on.' Her father lifted his brow while he awaited an answer.

'Yes, Father.' Anna nodded.

'You do like him, don't you?'

'I don't dislike him...'

'Oh well, then, wonderful! Try your best to please him Anna. I would like to join our families together.'

'I know, Father. If he loses interest in me it'll be his fault not mine.' She really didn't care.

'Good. That's good.'

Mr Simon Smith was mostly sweet. A smart man with a sharp eye for business. Always busy, always tired. Too old for his years, too keen on women. Sometimes one would think he cared about his daughter's feelings more than anyone else, but behind closed doors and at the end of the day, those feelings were mostly forgotten and he would have his way no matter the cost.

'Also, you are going to the factory with me tomorrow.' He said gulping down his drink.

'Whatever for?'

'I want you to start learning the business. It'll be yours one day and you are old enough to get to know the place now. We've been raising you for that.'

Anna nodded. 'May I be excused now?'

'Of course my darling. Go on.'

She was going to the factory! Anna ran to her room more happy than she thought she would be. At least it was something interesting!

Anna was tired of staying at home sewing, of trying to hold conversations with a mother who only spoke to say no or comment on how wrong something was. Try as she might, Anna could never do or say anything to please Mrs Smith.

She would be with her father all day, who she found much more interesting than her mother, and she would be able learn something new that didn't include marriage matters.

Yes, she was happy.

'I heard you are going to the factory with the Master tomorrow.'

'Yes, Elsie I am! And to be honest with you I am so very excited.'

'That is good, Miss. Life without excitement isn't worth living,' Elsie said as she helped her Miss out of her dress.

'Are you saying you have an exciting life, Elsie?' Anna giggled.

'Oh Miss, you are far too young to know about my life. I was twenty one once too, you know. I wasn't born old.'

'I hope you weren't, that would be horrible.'

Anna jumped into bed and wrapped herself beneath her soft silky sheets. She looked over to her teddy afraid of the judgmental eye of her maid.

'Just don't let the Mistress see you sleeping with that horrid doll. She'll throw it away.'

'I'll get rid of it once I marry, I promise. I'll just keep it here,' she said, placing the old teddy that was given to her when she was a baby beside her pillow.

Her mother had forbidden her to sleep with such a thing ever since she turned seventeen, but fours years had passed since then and Anna always managed to keep it hidden from her eyes. Mrs Smith used to say that the next one with whom she should share her bed was her husband.

'_What kind of decent Lady sleeps with a doll? Your husband will give you back to us on the wedding night if he sees that thing.' _

'Elsie…?'

'Yes, Miss?'

'Tell me one of your stories...I'm so excited about tomorrow I can barely keep my eyes shut.'

The kind maid sat down at the end of her bed, just like she had since Anna was a little child, and thought for a moment before beginning.

'So, you said it would be horrible to be born old, didn't you?' Anna nodded yes as her eyes sparkled with curiosity in the candlelight. 'Well then, let me tell you the story of a man who was born old...'

XXXXXX

Anna was not so excited when her maid opened the windows of her room to the early light of the morning. It wasn't seven yet and she was eating her breakfast with her father.

'What will I be learning today, Father?'

'Thomas will show you around the factory, so you can get to know the place.'

Thomas Barrow. One of father's workers. His job was to keep an eye out and yell at those who were being lazy. He would watch over them like a vulture, ready to strike at every weak move they made. Anna would learn later that he would often use humiliation to do his job, much more than fairness. She would also learn with time that fairness was something rare in the real world. The real world that she knew nothing about. Yet.

'You have to know all the lines of production and what workers do in each of them before learning how to run the business. You have to know the work as well as you know yourself to understand and be fair in every decision you make.'

Anna simply nodded.

XXXXXX

That morning, the road to the factory seemed longer than usual. She had a book in her hands. A romance. A silly nonsense as her mother would call it. As she held the book against her chest she thought about everything. How the carriage stumbled against the dirt road and its stones and bumps. How long this ride was taking. She had been eleven the last time she'd visited her father at the factory. Exactly ten years ago. Maybe that was the reason. Maybe she was scared. Scared about what her future held. Maybe she didn't want to marry Charles...what was she thinking about? What did Charles have to do with the long road to the factory?

_Because you'll be learning what you'll teach to his children. _

She shook her thoughts away. She was fine with whatever her parents decided. Why was she trying to pretend she wasn't?

_Maybe you aren't. You aren't. You are pretending you are fine, but you aren't._

She looked down at her book.

_How many times have you dreamed of kissing him? How many times have you dreamed of kissing anyone at all? Do you even know what love is? How ardent a feeling can be? When your chest hurts because you miss your beloved..._

'Here we are!' Her father's voice interrupted her line of thought, and she was glad for that.

The cold hit her face as strong as a slap. She felt her skin clutch under the cold in a painful way and she brought one of her hands to her cheeks to feel what she couldn't feel anymore. Her hand met ice and she touched her nose with her gloved hand, but she giggled when she tried to opened her mouth to stretch her muscles.

'I know now how polar bears must feel!'

Simon didn't answer, he only rolled his eyes at her childish manners. She stopped.

'Let's go inside now before we freeze to death,' he said, and two minutes later they were feeling the inviting heat of his office.

XXXXXX

'Here's where the cotton is scrapped and then it goes into those machines,' Thomas pointed out in the distance. 'To get it lined up.'

'I see.'

Anna looked around trying to take everything in. Thomas was being as kind as he could, but she could tell how annoyed he was with her presence. Every question she asked was received by a dismissive look and a short reply. Most of the questions weren't answered in a clear way but she daren't to ask them again. Her father would know about this.

But then she was busier saying good morning to the workers herself. All of them wanted to greet the daugher of their master themselves. They looked at her as if she were some sort of goddess descending from Heaven.

To be honest she was a bit uncomfortable with all the staring, from both men and women, even the children. _So very young to work_, she thought.

She should know why they were looking at her like that. Their dirty faces, unkempt hair, and ragged clothes spoke for themselves.

The tour came to an end when Thomas said it was lunch time. Her father was doing business with new vendors, and she was left alone.

Anna grabbed her book and went outside hoping that she could find a spot to read, but as soon as she opened the wooden door she was met once again by the impossible cold. When she turned around to go back inside the heavy door closed with the strong wind, leaving half of her skirt stuck.

She tried to grab her hat from flying away while trying to get her dress free from the door and in a nervous haste she let her book fall on the ground along with herself. The hat flew and she cursed. 'Blast!'

The icy wetness of the ground ate through her dress as she sat there trying to gain her footing. She didn't know why but tears were ready to fall from her eyes when suddenly she felt something warm against her back, pulling her up like a holy force.

'Here, Miss. Let me help you.' The voice she heard wasn't familiar but calm and steady; as steady as the arm that helped her stand. 'That was quite the tumble, Miss. Are you hurt?'

'No, I'm fine. I think the snow for once helped,' she smiled. His face was still unknown but she was already so thankful to him.

The mysterious man opened the heavy wooden door and let her dress lose. 'There you go, Miss,' he said while she adjusted her dress. 'I'm sure your maid can fix that.' She nodded yes and when she turned full of curiosity to see his face she saw him lean down reaching for her book. He handed it to her with a smile.

'Your book.'

Something about him struck her. She found herself staring just like all those people had stared at her moments before. But this time she didn't have a dirty face and unkempt hair, she wasn't staring because he was elegant and well dressed. He was the one dirty, rough and ripped clothes, but there was something about him. His eyes were hazel, kind and bright, and his face was gentle. His voice was deep but soft, and his smile was charming. He was tall and well built, large and strong like a broken prince. _More like a warrior_, she thought. She had seen many men in such a state before but none had called her attention as much as he did.

'Your book, Miss?'

'Oh! I'm sorry, I wasn't thinking,' she said nervously. 'Thank you so much.'

'No need to thank me, just be careful next time. Here, I'll take you inside.'

XXXXXX

They walked through the factory and Anna was already lost.

'This is all so confusing.'

'It's the machinery, Miss.'

'Do you work here?'

'I do. I carry the cotton outside to the carriages. Sometimes I line it up.'

'That's interesting.' She tried to make small talk. Mother always said that you should have a topic for conversation.

'If you say so.' He was still smiling at her, gentle and calm.

Anna nodded.

'You are the daughter of the Master, aren't you?'

'Yes, I'm Anna Smith.'

'I'll take you to your father, then.'

'And you? Who are you?'

'Bates.'

'That's it? Bates?''

'For you, Miss...yes.'

XXXXXX

She was having dinner with her parents that night when she thought of him again. Maybe his act of kindness was what attracted her to him? Mother would say that such people, poor people, didn't have manners nor rules nor even kindness. Well, he had all of those. He had been kind and showed manners.

Deciding that her mother was mostly wrong about people, she excused herself from the table.

'Before you go,' her father began, 'tomorrow night Charles is coming for dinner.'

The tone in her father's voice was as obvious as a cough. 'Won't we be going to the factory?'

'We are but we'll be home early. Now go to bed, you have a long day tomorrow.'

XXXXXX

As she read her book in bed the written words were echoing in her ears. Words of love and passion. Longing. She prayed she would fall in love with Charles. Long for his presence on the lonely nights. Her parents slept in separate rooms, but in her book lovers slept together. She wanted that for herself. A marriage with love and respect. The respect her father never gave to her mother. She sighed and placed her book on the nightstand. When she fell asleep she dreamed of him. Bates.

XXXXXX

Anna had woken up very surprised. In her dream Bates was reading with her. That was all. He spent the night reading...what a strange dream. She dressed quickly with the help of her maid, and she never hated corsets as much as she did now, and not one hour later she was in the factory.

Thomas was there and she stood by him while he watched over the workers. Yelling when a man wiped sweat from his brow even though it was snowing outside. He yelled at a small boy because he giggled, and at a mother who helped her daughter to stand after a fall.

'Keep working you lazy beast,' he said once but shrunk back when Anna gave him a shocked glance.

'That was very rude, Mr Barrow.'

'They behave like animals don't they?'

She looked at those poor souls. They most certainly didn't. She hated Barrow and nothing would ever change her mind.

When she looked down again she saw him. The man from her dream. She excused herself and holding her book firmly in her hands she walked towards him.

'Good morning, Mr Bates.'

'Good morning, Miss.' He had seen her looking at him from the top of the landing and he knew she would come talk to him.

'I want to thank you again for yesterday.'

'There's no need, Miss. It was my pleasure to give a helping hand,' he smiled and it reached his eyes and she stared once again.

'I hope you don't go outside again...to read your poems.'

'I won't...I've learned my lesson...' she smiled. 'How do you know it's poems?'

'It says 'Poetry, A Compilation of Love Poems,' he pointed.

'You know how to read?' Anna was surprised.

'I do, Miss.' Shame painted her face because she judged him by his appearance.

'I'm sorry...mother...'

'Your mother tells you how ignorant we are?' he spit out, almost bitterly.

'I don't believe her though.'

'You obviously do.' He looked down focusing on the work before him.

'I just thought a working man like you wouldn't have time to read.'

He looked up and was surprised at how smart she was. How well she could fix an uncomfortable conversation. He couldn't help but smile.

'And I don't...but at least I learned how to.'

'What books do you own?'

'I own nothing but my family, Miss.'

They stayed in silence for a moment taking in what he had just said. She felt sorry for him but he was glad he was honest with her.

'I see you are lining today...doing extra work?' she broke the silence.

'It has to be done,' he said working his hands through the cotton lines.

'Of course. So you can support your family.' He nodded in acknowledgement. 'Does your wife work here?'

'No...not anymore. I am a widower.'

'I am sorry… I didn't know.'

'Of course you didn't.'

The silence prevailed for a moment more before she spoke again. 'Do you have children then?'

'I have a small boy.'

'Oh! It must be difficult for a man to raise his child alone.'

'Yes. It is,' he sighed.

'How old is your boy?'

He looked at her again, with an amused look on his face. How ever so curious this young woman was. He saw nothing but kindness in her eyes and interest, legitimate interest and no malice. It wouldn't harm if he told her.

'Six.' He looked around. 'See the lad there, that's him. William.'

He pointed out a boy who was picking cotton from the floor. His clothes were worn out, his trousers were ripped at the knees. He had his father's face, round and chubby, and his smile as his small hands patted the floor after the white material.

'He's so young to be working.'

'Our children are never too young to work, Miss.'

What reality was this that she didn't know about? 'Children should go to school and stay home with their mothers.'

'He earns one pence to pick up as much cotton as he can, with that pence he helps me to buy bread for my house, besides, if his mother was alive she would be working here so he couldn't stay home alone.'

He looked at her with a serious look on his face. Not mean, nor rude, just serious. Serious about their condition. Anna didn't say another word.

'Anna! There you are. It's time to go,' her father called to her.

She nodded yes. 'It was nice to talk to you, Mr Bates.'

'See you tomorrow, Miss.'

'Yes.' She smiled when he looked away and a second later she was gone.

'Why were you talking to Bates?'

'I was...asking him if he could explain what he was doing. I want to know, as you said, you should know the work as best as you know yourself.'

'I am glad to see you are interested, Anna. It's very good. This is our business and you should care for it.'

XXXXXX

Dinner went well, as appearances often did. Anna pretended she was pleased, her parents pretended to be happy. Charles told her how beautiful she looked in green and that he liked a woman who was interested in the family business. Anna nodded and thanked him.

He was well dressed, with his blond hair rolled back and loads of perfume all over his jacket. She noticed how nice his skin looked in the candlelight and how his smile was beautiful but didn't reach his eyes. He asked her what she liked to do, and she said reading. He laughed but when she didn't join him he stopped, apologetic. He didn't like to read. He liked to play cards and chess, ride in good weather, and dance. He liked parties and piano concerts, and helping his father with the factory.

'I'm a lawyer now so I help him with legal papers and things like that. Too much reading already... Are you enjoying helping your father in the factory?'

'I just stand there watching those poor souls work. Father thinks I'm helping him that way.'

'You should tell him what you feel. Honesty is always the key.'

_I don't want to marry you. _'Thank you for your advice Charles.'

They chatted for over an hour, about this and that. The weather, the news, business.

When he left Anna felt free. Until her father told her something she was not expecting to happen so soon.

'Albert spoke to me, and next Sunday Charles will be asking for your hand.'

She felt her face grow hot, boiling. She nodded. 'As you wish, father, may I go now?'

After his permission she went to her room, fell into bed, and cried. She held her book to her chest tightly.

'_Will I ever fall in love without having too?' _She wished for that more than anything, but she knew now it wouldn't be possible.

* * *

_**A/N:** Thanks for reading! Next chapter Anna will be engaged and not very happy about it, and we'll know more about Bates family._

_**Thank you for reading :)**_


	2. Chapter 2

_**A/N:**_Hello my friends, here it is chapter 2! I hope you enjoy it and sorry for the delay.

_**Disclaimer:**_ Same as chapter 1.

* * *

Anna could hardly get herself out of bed on that Monday morning. She was engaged. Mr Johnson and Charles had been there last night and he had proposed to her. Her father said yes for her as her heart denied it. He had kissed her on the corner of her mouth when they were left alone for a couple of minutes, and she felt nothing but sadness. Her night had been spent crying and reading. Trying to imagine herself in another world. She couldn't. Her life was too real and now she understood why her mother, so many years ago, had to be dragged to the altar. Anna just never believed it would happen to her, even though she tried to pretend she was ready for an arranged marriage, she now was sure she wasn't. She never had been and she never would be.

Today the wind had shown some mercy and she found herself outside in the freezing cold. She needed some fresh air, even though the air was way too cold for her nose and lungs. She didn't mind. She couldn't feel her soul all that well either way.

His voice struck her through the density of the icy mass. 'I thought you had learned your lesson, Miss.' His smile was warm like a blanket in the middle of a very cold night, and she felt comfortably better with the sound of it.

'Last nights events made me forget about my lesson, Mr Bates.'

He stared at her for a moment and saw how her small smile turned into sadness, even despair.

'Why is such beautiful girl like you so downcast?'

She smiled again at his words, but she didn't know how real they were for him. When she was ready to deceive him about her own troubles her burning eyes gave her away. She thought of him as her friend, even though she'd only known him for a week. There was something about him that made her feel at home. Safe. It was when her lip trembled and she pouted that his eyes widened and he approached her. He placed his index finger under her chin and lifted her head gently, in what he later believed to be an impulsive act that never should have happened. 'Miss?' He wouldn't think that for long.

Anna was lost. She fell into his arms, just in the same spot she had fallen into his catch the first time. In the same spot that her book had lain on the ground when she had met him.

His chest was inviting. The heat of his body was transferred to hers as she cried with her head over his heart. She could hear it pounding like a wild beast but she didn't care. For a moment he didn't know what to do. He looked around and saw no one, but what if someone came and saw them in this state? She was a Lady and he worked for her father. This would ruin her for sure, but as he felt her grasp tighten on his shirt, slowly he forgot about the world around them and brought his hands to her back, wrapping his arms around her and rocking her like an infant.

'What happened Miss?' He was worried.

'I am engaged,' she said between sobs. 'I am to marry the son of one of my father's partners.'

John heard it, and he didn't know why but he didn't like the sound of it. Why should he care? But he cared.

'I don't want to!' she said, breaking the embrace just enough to face him. 'I don't love him.'

Without thinking, John cleaned her tears from her cheeks with his thumbs but as soon as he did it he composed himself.

'Miss, please.' He brought his hands up to the air, telling her she should let go of him.

'I'm sorry, Mr Bates,' she sniffed.

'I wish I could help you, Miss,' he said straightening his old jacket. 'But...maybe if you reach your father's heart.'

'Actually, it's not my father I fear, but my mother. She's been telling me for as long as I can remember that I was raised to marry a proper gentleman, ' Anna rolled her eyes, 'and to continue to work for the family business.'

'Do you know him?'

'Mr Bates...' She took a deep breath. 'I've known him since I was little, but I don't know him at all.'

John nodded, he knew exactly what she meant. 'Well, Miss, listen...you are a Lady, a fine one, any man would fall at your feet, and I'm sure this fiance of yours likes you. Maybe...maybe you both can build a happy life together, people learn how to love, you wouldn't be the first.' His advice was hurting him in ways he couldn't even comprehend.

'You are embellishing the term 'used to each other' aren't you?'

He sighed. She was too smart for her age. Young women like her were way more naive, she should be like that too. At least she wouldn't suffer as much, not yet.

'I don't want that. I want to fall in love naturally. Is that silly of me?'

'No, Miss. Not silly at all.'

'And you know what's worse? This is just my stubbornness. Until a few days ago, I was fine with the idea of marrying him but now that this is real...now that I should be fine with it I am not.'

'Battles are not to be fought before the enemy is in sight, Miss.'

Anna laughed and looked at him with a raised brow. 'Are you saying that my fiance is an enemy, Mr Bates?' She cleaned more tears away from her eyes.

'Before you know what will happen for sure, Miss,' he smiled.

'I understand. Thank you, Mr Bates. It's always nice to talk to you. You have a way with words.'

'I have to tell you, Miss, no Lady has ever said such thing to me before. Thank you.'

She smiled before going inside. Her bones were already aching from the cold and even though she felt warm around him she knew she would be ill if she stayed for long. 'Thank you,' she said looking at him one more time.

John stayed there for a minute longer. His chest still warm from her embrace, his heart still racing, her smell still invading all his senses. He closed his eyes and touched his own hands. The softness of her cheeks had been surprising, incredibly silky like. The perfection of her pale skin almost overwhelming. He didn't want the feeling of her in his hands to go away, so he stayed there before going inside and spoiling her softness with the hard cold metal of the cotton machines, but before allowing himself a minute more he rubbed his hands against his dirty clothes. No! He had no right to prolong her purity against his stained hard hands.

Since he saw her for the first time, when he helped her, he had gone soft for her. He'd known her since she was a baby, but now that she was a woman he had forgotten about the time her mother would visit her father with a little Miss Smith in her arms.

Yes, he battled himself inside his mind. _What are you doing, John? Why do you feel this way? What power does the sight of her have over you that you let your weakness overpower your sense?_

John had always been a respectable man. A man that knew his place, his mind, but at the moment he only knew that he cared for this girl more than he should. More than he liked.

That night when he arrived home and undressed, cautiously, he smelled his shirt. It still smelled of roses and of the tears she had shed there. He dared himself to imagine her in his arms for a little longer, but was awakened from his dream when he heard the children running around the house.

He dressed in his night clothes quickly before meeting his sister by the fireplace. He smiled at her as she fed her baby, and as the little boys and girl played together. He wouldn't allow himself to dream of the impossible like a silly boy. He had his family to think about. Anna Smith was like a doll in a fancy storefront; only to been seen, not to be touched.

'You must be tired, brother, and hungry. Sit and eat.'

'I ate some soup before finishing work.'

'John, you need to eat. A big man like you needs sustenance.'

'I am alright Mary, don't worry,' he smiled.

The dark haired woman nodded and watched as her little baby girl nursed on her breast. Mary had long black hair tied in a bun on the top of her head. Her eyes were dark and her skin pale, she was tall but as opposite of her older brother she was lean.

'You know...the Master's daughter is engaged.'

'Anna Smith?' Mary inquired.

'Yes, the two of you used to play when she visited her father in the factory, remember?'

'Vaguely, yes. Well, she must be marrying a gentleman. One as rich as her father.'

'She's not happy about it though.'

'How do you know?' Mary was confused. How did her brother know about the Miss' feelings and affairs?

'She told me.' She raised her brow. 'I helped her the other day, and well...we talk sometimes, and today she told me that. She fell into my arms crying.'

Mary's eyes widened at her brother's words. She adjusted the baby and her dress. 'Why?'

'Well, she found comfort in me, I guess. She was crying and I found her, and she doesn't see any difference between us or any other rich man. She's a very sensitive young girl.'

'Arent' they all?' she smiled. 'But John, if someone saw you...you would be sacked! You know that.'

'I felt sorry for her. Don't know why really.' For her and for himself, but yes, he didn't know why, not yet. And if he knew he didn't care, he couldn't care.

Mary saw her brother's worry. He'd always been a good man. A man who cared for others more than he did for himself. This wasn't unusual at all.

'John, she may have the world laid at her feet, but without love not even a king can find happiness.'

He sighed. Mary was right.

'Uncle, a story!' Elsa begged, as she grabbed his leg with all the strength she had.

'Please, please, please...' Two boys joined her, his own son and his sister's, George, and John could only smile.

'When have I ever failed to tell you all a story before bed?' He took her in his arms and kissed her cheek. 'Come on then, all of you.'

XXXXXX

Three months passed and Anna found herself thinking that time had tricked her. She was engaged now, and soon she would be a wife. One night she had tried to tell her mother that maybe they should wait a little longer, but for her mother the sooner she was married and bearing children of her own the better. Anna was nervous. Afraid. Her mother was no person to be contradicted.

Charles visited her every Sunday and Monday to court. A courtship which consisted of sitting by the fire, each on a chair, talking about their day and their future. No more kisses. She would move to his house, he would work hard, but her maid wouldn't come.

'_But, Elsie...she's more like a mother to me than a maid.'_

'_I have maids, Anna, you'll chose the one you like the most. Maybe one your age so you can both talk? You won't feel so lonely.'_

No. She didn't want anyone but Elsie. She had to hold her tears in that moment, but little did she know that she had many more tears she'd have to hold.

XXXXXX

Anna had been thinking about the last months as she sat on a crate outside the factory, away from prying eyes, eating a piece of bread and cheese that she had picked up from her father's office. He always had food there as he would pass the whole day locked within those walls. So many things had happened. More than she could have ever imagined. Her life had changed drastically, but she was not happier.

If her mother saw her now she would tell her off for sure. Sitting on a crate eating bread and cheese! Anna giggled to herself. Her mind was miles away from her body, and the place she was in, when suddenly she felt someone looking at her. Sheglanced around for a moment before seeing him. The little boy peeking behind a crate that was much taller than him.

'Hello.' She let him know she was aware of his presence. 'Come here.' As the boy, all so shy but curious, approached her she recognised him. 'William?'

'Yes, Miss.'

'What are you doing there?'

The boy shrugged his shoulders.

'Are you hiding?'

He nodded yes.

'From who?'

'Mr Barrow, Miss.' The words almost too difficult for him to pronounce. He came nearer to her, and with a sad face he showed her his pockets. 'I stole cotton, Miss.'

'William, that is wrong. Why did you do that?'

The boy didn't know. He just did. 'Pa will be angry.'

'Oh, yes he will. I'm sure your father teaches you better than that, doesn't he?'

William nodded and a tear fell down his chubby cheek.

'Oh no, don't cry.' Anna jumped from the crate and kneeled before the dark haired boy. 'Come here,' she patted his hair and kissed his forehead. The boy was dirty, his tears were drawn on his brownish cheeks but he smelled of nothing but virgin cotton. She cleaned his tears away with the white handkerchief she always carried, and soon it was no longer white.

'Here, give me the cotton. Now, you won't do it ever again, else I'll be forced to tell you father. Alright?'

The little boy brought his chubby baby like fists up and rubbed his tears from his eyes before nodding.

Anna looked back and saw that she had placed the bread under the crate. Standing up she grabbed it before asking him if he wanted some. In an instant as if he already knew what she was going to ask, he nodded his head with shining eyes. She gave him a piece and upon seeing him devouring it as if he were a starving lion she gave him the rest.

She stared at him until he was finished and was shocked at the image before her. The tears started burning as realisation struck her like lightning. Suddenly they heard footsteps, heavy and slow but not at all intimidating.

'Hello, Miss,' he said with a smile in his eyes. 'I see William is bothering you.'

'He's not, Mr Bates. I was enjoying chatting with him.'

John smiled but his eyes gave away his irony. 'And were you also enjoying hiding what he did?'

She raised her brow in surprise and felt much like she was the one who had stolen the cotton. 'I'm sorry, Mr Bates. I just didn't want him to be in trouble. He knew he did wrong.'

'And still.. he did it.'

The boy was looking at his feet, his belly already full, his lungs empty.

'Son. Why did you do that?' John touched his head gently and she was glad for that.

William gulped. 'To sell.'

'To sell?'

'So...so, we...to buy food.'

John sighed. 'Son, stealing is wrong. It's better to starve with honour than feast in shame. Do you understand?'

The boy nodded.

'What's 'feast'?' he asked after a second.

'It's a great amount of food.'

He didn't know what it was, both because it was a new word but also because the only great amount of anything he had ever seen was of cotton.

'I heard you and aunty...'

'You are far too young to pay attention to what we say. Understand?' William nodded.

John took the boy in his arms, a boy already too big to be held. 'Thank you for the bread, Miss.'

'It was my pleasure. You won't punish him will you?'

The boy looked at his father with wide eyes, asking him with a scared look on his face if indeed he was waiting for a punishment. 'He already had his punishment, Miss.'

Then he walked away, with his son's arms wrapped around his neck.

'I like the Miss.' William said when she was out of their sight.

'I like the Miss too, son.'

XXXXXX

Only three months had passed and Anna loved being at the factory. She didn't find anything to do really, but she liked it either way. In the morning her father would show her some papers and how he kept the work in check but after lunch she was on her own.

She would talk to the people, and laugh with the children, always under the attentive eye of Thomas.

Coming to the factory was the highlight of her days. In fact, speaking to Mr Bates and listening to what he had to say about the world was why she liked it so. He had a way with words. A gentle way. A way she never thought would exist. He told her about his sister; a widow with three children of her own, George, Elsa and Sara. He told her about how her husband had died with a cough two months before baby Sara had been born. His sister had played with her when they were children but Anna didn't remember. He loved his family, and everyone could see that in the way he spoke about every single one of them. Anna once asked about his wife and he only said that she had died in childbirth, no more words were spoken in that day after his answer.

People trusted her, they thought she was different; that her heart was bigger than her petite figured showed. And with trust came secrets and soon she discovered that they were planning a riot and maybe also a strike. What she didn't know was who was behind these ideas. She talked to him everyday, but she had no clue.

XXXXXX

'How was today?'

'Can you imagine?'

'John. It's dangerous. What if the master sacks you?'

'Mary, I have to fight for what I believe. Look at your children. Don't you want a better life? For their sake?'

She looked down at the baby in her arms and she whispered yes.

'Well?'

'But if they sack you, it'll just get worse!''

'I have to try, Mary. Please. Trust me.'

'Mrs Manning said she would watch over the baby so I can get back to work.'

'None of that Mary. She's still too small and...I've heard you coughing a lot lately.'

'It's just a cold.'

'Your late husband said the same.'

They stayed in silence.

'Alright, I'll stay for another month.'

'Thank you.'

'How's the Miss?'

He looked at his sister from the corner of his eyes.'She's well,' he said slowly.

'Have you been talking to her?'

'Yes, we talk.' Why was Mary asking about her now? He was trying to not think about her. He failed, but he tried.

But Mary knew her brother better than she knew herself. 'William says she looks like a princess.'

'She does,' he smiled for a moment before realizing that he was giving himself away. 'Well...she's a lady.'

'But not like... every lady.'

'No. She's nicer. She's humble. Knows her mind.'

'And you like her.' she giggled.

'Of course I do!' he said unimpressed. 'She's nice and she's a clever girl. Why wouldn't I like her?'

'Oh John!'

'What?'

'You are far too old for a crush.'

'Mary, you are a mother. You shouldn't be so silly.'

'William told me you smile more when she's near you.'

'William!' he gave his son a pointed look. 'How many times must I tell you, you shouldn't pay attention to the things I say and do?!'

'But, aunty asked,' the boy stopped a game of hide and seek to answer his father.

He looked at his sister and rolled his eyes before kissing the top of her head and wishing them goodnight.

XXXXXXX

He dreamed of her that night. Her hair was loose and she was wearing a green dress. They were by some river and the wind was blowing her golden locks, making them look like blonde waves as vast and as beautiful as the sea. Her eyes were bluer than he had ever seen them and clear as the sky on a Summer afternoon. She smelled of roses like she usually did and her hands were soft on his. He woke up in a sweat, after their kiss, and he could swear the house smelled of her as if she had been there for real.

He cursed himself and sat up on his old blanket. He hated himself in that moment. How could he take such liberty in dreaming of her? He was twenty years older than her. He remembered her from when she was just a baby. This was wrong. She was a young lady, ready to marry a man she deserved, even though she didn't like him...she would learn how to. She had to. And here he was, an old mill worker with no money to buy one bean, and he was dreaming of her in such ungracious way.

He brought his hands to his face, covering his eyes and sighing in his palms. His chest started to ache desperately and his heart raced like a wild horse. What was this? He asked himself. Even when his wife died his heart had been more contained.

'Oh God!' he whispered to an entity he didn't believe existed. He loved her.

* * *

_**Next Chapter: **Anna and Bates say their goodbyes after a protest breaks in the factory. But surely fate won't allow them to be apart for long._

_**Thank you for reading :)**_


	3. Chapter 3

**_A/N:_** Good evening everyone :) Thank you all so much for your follows, faves and reviews! I love to read every single one of them, and I'm so happy that you are enjoying this fic. It means a lot to me. Hope you enjoy this chapter.

**_Disclaimer:_** Same as chapter 1 and 2.

* * *

It only got more difficult after that dream, for that was just the first of many. With every glimpse and shared word, he fell more and more deeply into the dead end of the path of love.

John tried to avoid her many times, but whenever he did he saw in her face that she knew what he was doing, and the hurt and disappointment in her eyes made it so much worse for him. They still talked, sometimes, and with every conversation they shared she grew fonder of him. Somehow that tall and rough man touched her soul like no other human being before him. His appearance so different from his existence. She felt a connection, they both did, and although it was strange, for it couldn't exist between two more different people, when they were together everything made sense. Maybe their differences were just in the amount of money and status they had. Maybe their spirits had more in common than a shared smile at the precise time. Maybe they were made with the same substance in a different time and place, and that was the beginning of their troubles. Time and place.

XXXXXX

One Thursday, two months later, the long awaited protest broke. A verbal fight. Every worker joined in the shouting for their rights. Strong words were exchanged between the poor and keepers until Mr Smith had to intervene.

'This is one of the things you have to learn how to deal with. Those people love to make a fuss about what can't be changed,' her father told her, but she wasn't sure what the fuss was about and what couldn't be changed. Her mother always told her that only death was certain and unchangeable. But then what her mother told her were most of the times empty words to shut her up from thinking for herself.

The loud voices ceased when her father appeared at the top of the landing. 'What's this about?'

'Our children are hungry!' One of the men shouted. Anna tried to find Bates in the middle of the crowd but she failed to see him. He wasn't there, not physically, but the words spoken were injected with his ideals. Anna didn't know this yet, but her father did.

She was trying to listen to what they were saying from her father's office window but most of what she heard were loose words. 'Money. Hunger. Family.' were the words that she could understand. Tempers were tense all day after that, and she waited in the office until it was time to go home.

That night her father was quiet. He excused himself from dinner and went to bed earlier.

'Those beasts will kill your father one day, mark my words. I'll talk to him tomorrow...I think you should stay home with me instead.'

'But mother...' Anna didn't even know what to think. Why was her mother always trying to take the excitement out of her life? Anna knew this would happen sooner rather than later. She had noticed her mother's glances and twists of nose whenever Anna mentioned how much she liked going there.

'Don't you 'but mother' me, young lady. You are going to get married soon and your place will be at home waiting for your husband. You've learned your share about the business already, and it's getting dangerous.'

'I like going to the factory. I've even made friends!'

'Friends? With whom? Don't tell me you befriended those people, did you?'

Anna looked down. Her mother knew the answer. 'You can't trust them, Anna. They have no morals or dignity whatsoever! What do you do with the things I tell you? Throw them away as if they mean nothing?

Mrs Smith huffed when she missed a stitch on her embroidery.

'But you see, I don't agree with you. I like to talk with them. And they always have lessons to share, always are trying to have a better life, that's why they want to start a strike.'

'A strike? Does your father know that?'

Anna shrunk in her seat, aware of her mistake. 'He has an idea.'

'Oh god! How lazy can those people get?!'

'They are not lazy, mother. They work hard for the little they earn. It's unfair.'

Mrs Smith looked at her with wide eyes and a angry expression on her face.

'Already talking like one of them?! You know what is unfair? I'll tell you. That they are not thankful to your father. Your father gives them a job, gives a job to their wives and children and you know what they do? They spend the money on nonsense instead. That's why they don't have money. Oh Alas! See! I've ruined it.' She looked down at her piece of embroidery. 'You and your talking Anna Smith...thank God you are getting married soon. I can't even be at peace anymore.'

Anna looked at the her mother's work and all she could see was arrogance and selfishness. How could a failed stitch be more important than people's rights? Children starving? Love? She nodded and excused herself. Her mother told her to go and sleep and tell her friends goodbye in the morning because it would be the last day she would go.

XXXXXX

'I am sorry, Miss, but your mother is right.'

'Elsie, please.'

'They can be dangerous.'

'Elsie! You worked at the factory before. You were one of them. How can you talk like that?' She was mad but her raised voice didn't scare her maid.

'Because I was one of them, I know.'

Anna looked at her for a moment through the mirror while Elsie brushed her long blonde hair. She shook her head and opened her book on her lap reading one of the poems to pass the time. But she couldn't read it. Her thoughts were wild in her mind and she couldn't concentrate on anything.

'Mr Bates has been avoiding me.'

'Who?'

'Mr Bates, Elsie. The man I told you about.' Elsie knew all too well who he was.

'Maybe that's for the better.'

'Why?'

Her maid looked her in the eyes before telling her he was the most dangerous of them all.

'What do you know about him that I don't?'

'You tell me, Miss...what do you know about yourself, your feelings, that I don't?'

'I don't understand.'

'Since you were old enough to read, you've been with your nose in all sort of books...and you are telling me you don't understand?'

The flushed skin. The hot red cheeks. The racing of the heart. The staring, smiling, blushing. The need of being close to someone without a conceivable reason. Being unable to focus on anything because the mind wanders always in the same direction...him. Anna shook her head and Elsie smiled. 'It'll be better for everyone. He's dangerous for you. Now get in bed and sleep, Miss.'

She did sleep. Her book laid on the ground, wet, dirty, ripped and she was trying to put it in one piece. She could hear her mother's voice in the distance, but she couldn't quite grasp what she was saying, and then when she looked up she saw him, smiling, tall, and proud. He kneeled before her and took the book in his hands and before she knew it the book was in one piece again. The sun shone on her face and the morning had come.

XXXXXX

'I don't really think it's dangerous Anna, but your mother...you know how she is.' Her father told her on their way to the factory the next morning. 'They would never hurt you, even if they hurt me. They like you.'

Anna sat in silence while the carriage swang along the road.

'That Bates.' Her father closed his fist and hit it on his thigh. 'If only that man could be quiet. I'll have to sack him if he keeps talking too much.'

'What did he do?' Anna was scared.

'He's the one who stirs with their brain. You've talked to him before. You know how easy he is with words. They believe him and like to hear him speak.'

Easy with words. Yes, that was him. Always so polite and proper. Never spoke too much unless it was needed. She liked that about him. His honesty. He was so quiet most of the time, at least with her, and she found him almost mysterious. The way he watched everything attentively. The way that he took in every detail. The way he looked at her from afar, and the way he diverted his eyes when she caught him. His smile. His strong hands working their way through the cotton and the cold metal of the machinery, already so skilled. She sometimes wondered how old he was…

'How old is he, father?'

'Who? Bates? He's forty I think. He's worked for our family since he was a boy. I remember him when I was a boy, picking up cotton from the floor. He's been always a dangerous fellow….Oh! We are here.'

John Bates was dangerous. Because he believed in rights for the weak and poor, and because she liked him. Her heart was his and even though she had given it to him, with thoughts and dreams, she didn't know it just yet.

XXXXXX

'Good afternoon, Miss.' John said trying not to look surprised or happy by her presence.

'Good afternoon, Mr Bates,' she sighed 'I've came to say goodbye.'

'Goodbye?' His question was too immediate for his liking. He tried to compose himself. 'Why?'

'This will be my last day here. Mother doesn't want me to come anymore...because of what happened yesterday.'

'I see.'

'I know you are their leader.' Her hands were behind her back as she tried to question him.

'I'm no leader, for there's no army, Miss. We only want justice.'

'Mother said you spend your money wrong.'

'Your Mother says that because she doesn't know how much twelve pence are. Do you?

What can you buy with twelve pence, Miss?'

'I don't know.'

'I'll tell you. You couldn't buy half the hem of your dress. You couldn't even buy one button. You can buy bread and make a soup that has to last at least one week.'

'I'm sorry.'

'You say sorry but you don't really know how hard it is to support a family. You'll never know that. You'll marry a business lad who will inherit factories and money, and you'll never have to worry with anything but going to church on Sunday. You'll have a nanny for your children and you'll only see them at tea time. You and people like you are born with all the amenities and then you say sorry and pity us while our babies die of hunger. We don't want your pity, Miss. We want a better life. We are no less people than you. Our only sin was being born poor.'

They stayed in silence and John hated himself for a moment. He had no right to talk like that, not to her. It wasn't her fault things were this way. And she hated that he was right. That her life would be performed not lived. That she would marry and pretend to love, have children for others to raise. She would go to church every Sunday and pray for a life that would never be hers. He was right about that, but...her feelings were very different than her promised future. So she told him.

'I had a brother. He died when he was five. You must know that. Sudden death I think. I was ten and...I was very sad. Father was devastated, you know...for people like us, sons are very important to keep the name of the family. That's why I'm here, I'm my father's only hope.

He just stared at her.

'We may have a better life than you, but that doesn't mean we are not humans, that we don't suffer misery. Not the same kind, it's true, but we do. And I'm not like my mother, Mr Bates. I've been coming here for almost half a year, and honestly I've seen nothing but kindness and good hearts in these people. That goes against everything my mother ever taught me.'

'I am sorry, Miss. I shouldn't have...'

'Don't!' She brought her hand up. 'We are even now. From now on we'll only trade fair words.'

He smiled. 'You have a heart as big as the world... you'll be a much better master than your father, no offense.'

'I won't. I'll be at home waiting for my husband. Not here.'

His heart shrunk in his chest. 'Husband's do what the wives tell them to.'

Anna laughed. 'A husband like you maybe, not a husband like my future one. He already took my maid away.' She sighed sadly.

'Your maid? Elsie Hughes?'

'Yes, you know her?'

'I do. She used to work here. I remember her...'

'She's been my maid since I was a baby.'

He nodded. He remembered her leaving the factory to work as a nanny for the baby. He remembered that and the story that no one spoke about, that everyone chose to forget. He knew about it too well.

'He said he'll find me a younger maid, one that's my age so I don't feel too lonely but honestly Elsie is wonderful company to me, even though she's older. She's like a mother to me.'

John felt sorry for her. 'Maybe one day he'll give in.'

She shook her head. 'I think it's Mother's doing...well…I have to go. Goodbye, Mr Bates. I hope we see each other soon.' Anna smiled but her red eyes gave her sadness away, as they often did.

'Goodbye, Miss. I hope that too.' His voice was low, almost whispering. He didn't want to say goodbye. He had to look down so he wouldn't give away his disappointment, but when he looked up at her again she was leaning towards him, and before he knew it her lips were on his cheek. He froze as he felt the softness of her warm lips against his scratchy skin. Letting himself close his eyes for a moment, when he opened them again she was already leaving and looking back at him only once. She was far from him now but he saw her wet eyes, and he could still feel the warmth of her kiss. He touched his cheek and dragged his hand down to his chin until it dropped completely. His eyes were just like hers now, but he dare not shed a tear.

'Pa?'

John looked down and saw his son staring at him. 'What's the matter, lad?'

'Are we sleeping here tonight?'

Giggling he patted his son's dark hair, enough to mess it up just a little. 'No, son. Let's go home.'

XXXXXX

When he arrived, the sun was down and candlelights could be seen inside of every house. During Summer, when the sky was clear, the moon and the stars always helped, and as June made it's presence known with longer and warmer days John's heart was still cold. Cold as winter, but not for lack of one to love. Far from that, worse than that. Cold because he loved someone whom he could never have.

He took his coat and his hat off, and hung them on one of the chairs. His sister was feeding her children and soon William joined them.

'Here, sit down, I made fresh soup.'

He tried to refuse but she wasn't having it tonight. 'We won't be any poorer if you eat a bowl.'

John nodded. 'But I keep telling you, I have a good lunch every day and I always eat before finishing work.'

'Well, it won't hurt if you walk around working hard well fed, am I wrong?' She wasn't.

Slowly and silently, he ate his soup. The children laughed around him trying to be funny, telling stories, being children but John was not paying attention to them. Not even when little Sarah cried from her basket on the floor, he did take his eyes from his bowl.

After Mary tended to the baby and while the children were all playing, she sat next to him circling his left arm with hers.

'So tell me, brother, why are so so quiet tonight? Troubles with the master?'

He looked at her for a moment before looking back at his empty bowl. 'No,' he sighed smiling. 'I don't think I would be as affected by the master.'

'Oh John, tell me. You're making me worry.'

'There's nothing to worry about, really. It's just… Anna ...Miss Smith, will wed in two months and she won't be coming to the factory anymore...I just want her to be happy, but I don't think she will be and that's making me think.'

'John.' Mary shook her head.

'What?'

'If the Miss will be unhappy, there's nothing you can do. That's none of your business.'

'I wonder if there is.'

'Why are you taking such an interest in that girl's affairs?'

'I care for her. She's nice. She deserves to be happy. A dreamer like her, with the beautiful feelings she has in her heart, she deserves more than being sad for the rest of her life.'

'Once she has her own children she'll live for them. She'll be alright.'

'Her mother had her and she was never happy.'

'How do you know about her mother?'

'She told me.'

'So...you don't just talk sometimes….'

He said nothing.

'You should forget her.'

'Forget her? What do you mean?'

'You like her far too much for your own good.'

'Mary, you don't understand. I like her just...the way I like you. I would want you to be happy, always, and that's what I want for her.' He was lying.

'I hope it's just that. I don't want you to suffer for someone you can never have.'

'I don't know what you mean by that.'

'Yes you do. All I know is that you've been alone for far too long, maybe you should marry again.'

'Marry? Don't be silly. Who would marry me?'

'Not Anna Smith,' she giggled.

He took offense this time and stood up abruptly. 'Mind your own children and your own thoughts and leave me alone. Now I'm going to bed, it's late.'

Mary looked up at him in shock. Her brother never talked like that to her. The children fell silent and stared at him as he made his way to his mattress on the floor.

'Come on, children. Let's get ready to sleep,' Mary said as she took her baby from her cot to rock her. She was now sure that Miss Smith was something far more serious than she thought.

XXXXXX

He dreamed of her again, and she dreamed of him. Very different dreams with the same meaning. They would miss each other terribly, but not for very long.

* * *

_**Next chapter:** Everything is settled for Anna's wedding, and there's only two weeks left until the big day, but Charles' improper manners towards his bride will change the course of their everyone's future._

_**Thank you for reading :)**_


	4. Chapter 4

_**A/N:** Good evening everyone :) I hope you enjoy this chapter and please keep telling me if you are enjoying this story! It is so fun to write so I hope it's equally fun to read. Have a good week!_

_**Disclaimer:** Same as chapter 1 - 3._

* * *

'Stop with that long face of yours, Anna. You are trying on your wedding dress not being fitted for your coffin!'

Anna rolled her eyes. 'Were you happy when you tried your wedding dress, Mother?'

Her mother shot her a pointed look. 'I didn't know your father at all when we got married. I had only seen him twice in all my life. Now you and Charles have known each other for years!'

'You say that as if it made any difference,' Anna whispered.

'Look at this Elsie! Talking back to her mother as if I were her undertaker.'

The dress was awfully long and tight. She hated it. More for what it symbolised really. It was a business dress. The bag her parents were trading for success and power, and inside of that bag was her. Lost, sad, alone. She almost felt like a slave. And that's what she was, a slave to her position.

She was going to wed in less than two weeks and she already felt stuck in a life that wasn't her own.

Charles was a nice man but she didn't love him. She tried, she truly tried but she couldn't love him. Not while John Bates was still very much alive in her head and heart.

When she arrived home after their goodbyes over a month ago she promised herself she would forget him. She told everything to Elsie.

_'I admire him so much.'_

_'That's why I said he was dangerous, Miss. Because you do admire him. He has your heart and that's the most terrible thing a man can have from a woman. When a man has a woman's heart he has her soul, every piece of her. It's good in books but in real life when you give your heart to someone you should not, it's terrible.'_

_'I didn't give him my heart, Elsie. He doesn't know I like him that way, and we are just friends.'_

_'He doesn't know but you do. Listen, you better forget him at once. Thinking of him as dead is better than thinking of him as a friend.'_

_'Dead? I can't think he's dead!'_

_'It's for the best, child. Bury him deep and never talk of him again. It's for your own good. You are going to marry Mr Charles, a man your age, handsome, proper, a gentleman. You should be happy.'_

_'I know.'_

_'John Bates could almost be your father! He's much older than you and he has a son. A son and a dead wife.'_

_'Well, she's dead.'_

_'Forget him, Miss. For your own good.'_

And she promised she would but it was a promise she could not keep. True, she didn't give him her heart, he took it from her in that moment she first laid eyes on him. By surprise, without a clue, he took it and he could not give it back to her.

XXXXXX

The silence fell in the factory and Thomas looked up at the big clock on the wall. Six fifty.

'Bastards,' he said between clenched teeth.

The workers left, one by one, slowly, looking down at their feet. Their fear almost palpable, their eyes lost and shamed.

'Mr Smith! They are leaving, Mr Smith! It's a strike!'

'What?' The older man stood up from his chair.

'There's still ten minutes to go and the machines are all stopped. What do you want me to do, Sir?'

'Nothing, Thomas.' Mr Smith breathed in. 'Not today...tomorrow,' he thought for a moment, frowning. 'I want you to bring John Bates to my office tomorrow.'

Thomas smiled viciously. 'It'll be my pleasure.'

XXXXXX

'I've had my fill of you, Bates,' spoke Mr Smith, raising his chin as he stared out the window. 'Since you were nothing but a boy picking up cotton from the floor...I remember my late father saying that you would be trouble when you became a man...well, he was more than right!'

John listened attentively to his words.

'You look so much like your father Bates...but you are far more clever than he ever was.'

'As are you, Sir. You are much wiser than your own father. Fairer employer too,' John said honestly.

'So why do you keep pushing your limits, man?' Mr Smith slammed his fist on his desktop.

'Because, even though you are a fairer man than him, our children still cry in need of food. You pay better than he did but it's still not enough. We work too many hours a day. Our women don't have time to be mothers. How do you want us to survive like that?'

'Do you think I am made of money?! Do you think it's easy to run a business? You know nothing about my life as I know nothing of yours...you are my employee and that's that. Listen! Next time this happens you'll not put your feet inside this factory ever again, Bates! I'll sack you. And after I do, no one will give you a job, you know that don't you?'

'Yes sir, I know.' John dropped his eyes to the floor.

'You are warned. I don't want any more headaches like this one. Tonight will be the last visit of my future son in law before the wedding and I can't occupied my mind with this nonsense.'

John looked up at his master. Soon, she would be gone forever. His heart ached in his chest and his breath caught, and for a moment he couldn't move from his spot. She had never belonged to him, she could never, but somehow he felt a part of him being lost with her. As if her wedding meant their death. The most beautiful and tender part of him, gone forever.

'I hope everything goes well for you daughter, sir. She deserves much happiness.'

Mr Smith frowned, 'She's been childish enough to think quite the opposite. Girls these days...too much thinking on their own. It's hard to raise daughters, Bates. They never do as you say.'

John smiled, almost happy to hear it. 'She'll come 'round. They always do.'

'You don't know my daughter Bates,' his master sighed. 'Sometimes...if it wasn't for my wife...'

John's eyes grew wider. _If it wasn't for his wife what?_ _Spit it out, man!_

'Why am I talking to you about this? Go home man, you won't be working today...you can come back tomorrow. And I don't want to hear your name involved in this trouble ever again!'

'As you wish, sir.'

Mr Smith looked at him with an angrily. John could see the red of rage in his features and smiled inwardly.

One day without working meant less money at the end of the week, but John thought it would be worth it. The strike had shaken his master, that's all he wanted.

XXXXXX

At the Smith's house, dinner was going just as well as could be expected. Spirits were high, and everyone was quite talkative. Even Anna was trying hard to bring herself to be happy about her wedding. If her mother could spend a lifetime pretending she could do just the same. Their position was made for appearances, and Anna would play the high society's game...at least for now.

'You are a picture tonight.'

'You'll make me blush, Charles.'

'Can't a future husband admire his beautiful bride? You are a picture, Anna. Always.'

'Thank you. You are far too kind.' She pursed her lips, uncomfortable with his compliment.

'Anna!' her mother called. 'Why don't you show the library to Charles?' she smiled cordially.

_She might as well just say it and tell me to take him to a different room so we could be alone,_ Anna thought, sighing.

'Oh yes, I would love to see the book,' he raised his brow.

'I'm sure you would.' But her voice gave away her irony and Charles looked down awkwardly.

They both excused themselves and walked to the library. The room was enormous, almost as big as dining room. It was the nicest room in the house, and even though it was so large, Anna found comfort in it. The furniture was dark and the walls red velvet, though the long windows helped making it look less dark than it really was. She would miss coming here, and reading all the books she wished.

'I will miss my books,' she smiled sadly, running her fingertips across one of the great shelves.

'You won't be moving to China. You can always visit.'

'It's not the same, is it?'

'Our library is not as big but...it'll be as much yours as this one. You can decorate it with your likes, have all the books you want.'

'That's very kind of you Charles.'

'I just want to see you happy.'

'Im sure you do.'

'But you aren't, are you?'

She looked at him questioningly.

'You don't like me the way I like you,' he continued.

She looked down shyly as he approached her.

'I try to make you feel better and I try to show you how much I care for you and...' he closed the distance between them and she stepped back slowly until her back met one of the bookshelves. 'You never look at me with desire in your eyes. Whenever I visit you, I never see longing.'

'Charles...' he was so close to her she could feel his breath on her skin. She was starting to feel nervous but didn't know what to do.

'I want to kiss you.'

'Charles, please.' She tried to walk away from him but he grabbed her by the waist. She gasped. 'I'm not sure this is proper, Charles,' her voice was shaky and she was terrified. 'What if someone...'

'No one will come, they know we want to be alone. We've never kissed properly...I want to kiss you.' And before she could comprehend, his lips were on hers. He kissed her, almost violently as she tried to be free from his arms, and finally she was able to hit him hard enough to make him stop.

'What are you doing?!' she shouted in tears.

'You will be my wife! I'll give you whatever you want but you'll have to be mine! That's all I ask.'

He tried to grab her again and with all the strength she had in her she slapped him in the face.

'You will not touch me ever again!' she cried furiously.

He covered the aching hot cheek with his hand. 'You'll be my wife! You'll be the mother of my children, you will give me what I ask for.'

'I can't give you what belongs to someone else!' He stared at her in shocked silence after the words were spoken. Realisation hit her and she didn't know whether she should stay or run away. But when she saw the confusion on his face she made her decision.

'What? What did you say? Anna!' So she ran. He tried to take hold of her wrist but she was able to pass by him, and before he could catch her she was out of the door and gone.

XXXXXX

She ran as fast as she could, holding her dress in her hands so as not to trip. Her hair was falling down and tears stained her face.

At night time the streets were confusing. Every corner seemed the same, every sign was equal to the previous one and she felt even more lost now, if that was possible.

The streets were just like her life, a dead end with no hope for a new path to be crossed.

Then, out of the darkness, a large silhouette appeared and the shock of it made her head spin. She found herself on the ground, half awake, with his arms around her. The arms she so longed for. Was this a dream?

'Miss! Miss?' He tapped her cheek softly. 'Oh thank God. Wake up, Miss.'

'Mr Bates?' she mumbled.

'What on Earth are you doing here Miss, and in such state?' He helped her to stand and supported her in his strong arms, wrapping one around her middle. When she looked up at him and saw his kind smile she couldn't help but hug him. He stopped breathing when she did, but a moment after he let himself respond to her embrace.

He pushed them to the darkest part of the alley; if someone saw her with him, like this...it would be the end for both of them.

'What's happened, Miss?' he asked, rubbing her back. 'You can tell me.' Her sobs were painful to him as a stab to his heart. 'Please don't cry.'

'Charles...' she sobbed. 'He forced himself on me.' She said into his chest.

'What?! Look at me!' he said at once, fear and rage running through his blood. 'What did he do?' He asked as he rubbed his thumbs against her cheeks to clean her tears away.

'He grabbed me and kissed me.'

'What else?'

'He told me...' she stammered in embrasement. 'He told me I had to give him what he wanted because I'll soon be his wife.'

John nodded. 'That's all? He didn't do anything else?'

'I ran then. I slapped him and ran.'

He smiled at her, proud that she had found the courage to slap him. 'Good. Here, dry your tears.' He gave her his handkerchief.

'I can't go back, Mr Bates.' She dried her face.

'You have to.'

'I can't.'

'You can't?' He was confused.

'I said something...he will tell my father surely and if he does...I am ruined.'

'What did you say?'

'I said...' she looked down. 'I said, I couldn't give him what belongs to someone else.' She looked up at him again.

They stared at each other for a moment, as he took in her words. Words that made their way to his ears with all the meaning they held. The meaning of him, of them. The meaning of something ever so forbidden but not wrong at all. Of something so right as being alive, something so powerful as breathing. Their feelings were pure and true, and love is never wrong even when the world around them makes it look so.

As if something pulled him, he began to lean into her. She shivered inside when she felt his warm breath against her skin. How different her emotions were, when the man was the right one. She longed for his kiss, more than anything else, so she just stood there under his spell and within his strong arms, waiting for his lips to meet hers, waiting for his experience to guide her... but before anything could happen he thought twice of what he was doing. A man like him, with a girl like her, at night, in a dark alley...no.

'Miss,' he broke the silence, 'Come on, I'll take you home.'

She shook her head no, but he persuade her to walk, and they moved slowly along the road. The courage to look at him had abandoned her. In all her disappointment she was embarrassed. For him and for herself. He gave her his old jacket and she took it thankfully.

But silence between them never lasted long. The need to explain herself was always stronger than their awkwardness, and how many times like this have they shared before? So many she couldn't think of all of them, and all of them worked out for the better. She trusted him with her truth and her soul. Why, she didn't know. He held a mystifying power over her, over her mind and thoughts. His power made her share everything with him, even if sometimes she knew she shouldn't.

'I don't love him. I never will, and after tonight...I think I hate him.'

'You heart is too kind to hate.'

'I'm not that perfect, Mr Bates.' She stopped walking. 'I'm as human as you are.'

He chuckled, 'Of course you are.' But she was perfect to him. 'Here we are.' he said as he looked ahead and saw his master with anxious eyes looking on in the distance.

'Anna!' her mother called when she saw her at the door. 'We were getting ready to go look after you! What in God's name happened for you to ran away like that? And at night? Leaving us all worried and...' She looked at John then and widen her eyes in surprise. 'Who's this?' Her mother looked at John as if he were a wild beast that she had never seen before.

'Bates! You found her?' Her father asked approaching him with relief in his voice. Charles watched from doorway but did not come out.

'I found her wandering the streets. She was lost.'

'He helped me Father,' she pleaded as her mother looked at the jacket in her back in disgust.

'Thank you for bringing her home, Bates.'

'You don't need to thank me, sir.' Mr Smith offered him his hand and John took it. They both nodded and parted.

'Let's go inside, you are awfully unkempt.' her mother said twisting her nose, as if her state was more important than her well being.

'Wait!' Anna halted, and taking the old jacket from her back. 'Mr Bates?' He looked at her as she handed it to him. 'Thank you so much.'

'You're welcome, Miss.'

They shared a sad, longing filled smile, a smile as tender as if it were a goodbye kiss. The kiss that almost happened, and Charles saw it from his place in the doorway. Her eyes held what he wanted for himself. This Bates was the man she had talked about.

The mill worker had a smile on his face. A smile meant for her eyes only...and Charles wondered if something had happened while they were together, and when Anna entered the house, with her eyes downcast and a smile on her lips, he was sure.

XXXXXX

'Your fiance wants to say goodnight,' her mother said entering the room. 'He's waiting in the hall. Now put on a sorry face and don't forget your manners.' Anna was already in bed after a bath and a good airbrushing, so slowly and against her will, she stood up, put on her robe and wrapped her shawl around her shoulders and followed her mother.

'Here she is. Don't take too long you two. It's ever so late for meetings and chats.' Mrs Smith said before leaving them alone.

'Anna,' Charles looked around to be sure they were truly alone before continuing. 'I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that. I am very ashamed. Can you forgive me?'

Anna nodded, bringing her shawl closer to her, but she barely heard his words.

'We are going to be husband and wife next Sunday and I don't want us to walk down the aisle with our backs turned toward each other. I want us to begin our life on good terms.'

'Don't marry me then! Please, Charles.'

'What?'

'I don't love you Charles, you know that. Why make our lives miserable? I will never make you happy. I will never give you what you want. I wish I could, truly, but I can't.'

'I will make you forget him.'

'You won't. You will only make me remember him even more. Every kiss, every touch we share...I'll wonder how much better it would be if it was him.'

'How can you want to give yourself to a mill worker? Years older than you!'

'What?' she looked up at him in confusion.

'I know who he is. The man who helped you tonight. I saw the way you looked at each other... it's him, isn't it?'

She blinked nervously and her words failed to deny his accusations. Silence was always a yes and Charles knew it too well.

'How can you love such a crude man... He lives in the slums, Anna! He lives with rats walking around his feet at night. Does he even know how to hold a fork?!'

'He's not crude, far from it. And as for the rest...I don't love him because of where he lives, I love him for who he is. And he's only poor because my father doesn't pay them enough...'

'He has put those kind of ideas in your head already? That kind of talking is against our own.'

'He hasn't put anything in my head but love and kindness...and that kind of talk is not against our own! It's against injustice. Now...if we are unjust...'

'I'm sorry but I won't call be wedding off.'

'Charles!'

'I won't let you ruin our life over a stupid infatuation. I won't. I can't, Anna. You are just dazzled by something you don't know. You find him some sort of an attraction to sigh over for a couple of days.'

Anna didn't say a word. She looked down at her hands and cursed him for calling what she felt a stupid infatuation. How could he know? How could he understand? If he had a clue of what love was he wouldn't call it stupid. There's nothing more right than being in love. Yes, she had been sighing over him and she would do it for the rest of her life gladly. If only society was more merciful. If only an act of love wasn't pointed out as something dirty and stupid.

'Goodnight.' he said at last. 'I'll see you Sunday, at the aisle.' With that he left and when he was out of sight she ran to her room and fell in bed crying.

She punched her pillow in fury, her life falling away from her grasp like water.

'Miss, whatever is the matter?' Elsie came in the room as soon as he left.

'Oh Elsie. I don't know what to do with my life. I want to be happy and I don't know what to do.'

'I knew this was going to happen. You should have buried that John Bates deep on his grave!'

But how could she kill the one thing that made her feel alive. The one she had always been waiting for since she was not more than a child. Since she could think for herself, she would sit down at her window and look outside at the people strolling along the street, and she would imagine herself, married, happy, in love. With a crowd of children made from passion, to give her light in her life, and a handsome and gentle husband by her side to give her purpose. As she grew up, those dreams lost their fire. They became dormant in her heart. As she learned she would marry the one her father would choose, she gave up, but now, they were very much alive again, as John Bates was. He had made her dream again, made her feel restless and breathless and this time she didn't want to give up on them again. This time she almost tasted his kiss, she felt his touch and the strength of his arms around her. She couldn't bury it, she tried and she failed. She wouldn't try ever again.

'Do you know where he lives?'

'Who?'

'Elsie! Mr Bates.'

'Oh my Lord! Don't you fear for your future Miss? Why do you want to know?'

'I want to visit him.'

'Oh Lord.' The maid looked up questioning the heavens, 'What ruin will she bring upon this house?!.'

'Elsie...I want to bring them a basket. I know he has a sister...they struggle to feed the little ones...I want to say thank you after he saved me.'

'Your kindness towards them is touching but … Miss, you shouldn't.'

'Please Elsie! Tell me where he lives. If you don't someone else will. Please.' She begged as a child.

The maid thought for a moment, the indecision causing her to frown her brow. 'Alright,' she sighed, 'but you have to promise, that visit is a thank you and a goodbye. You are going to marry in five days! Your life is all settled as it is...please, don't ruin your future, my child, please.'

'I promise, Elsie. I promise,' she lied with a smile on her face.

When she was left alone to sleep, she took from under her pillow the handkerchief he had given her. Gently, she touched it. The rough fabric so different from the ones she was used to. It reminded her of his skin on the day she kissed his cheek. Her half opened eyes gave away her wandering mind. She was there again, in that dark alley with him.

Caressing the fabric against her cheek she let herself dream of that so longed for kiss. What would he taste of? Would she like it? Would she feel the world spin around herself? It wouldn't be like Charles' that was a fact. His kiss had been clumsy and she even felt disgust. His skin had been soft and he smelled of fancy perfume, and the taste of his lips held nothing but demand.

She smelled the white fabric and Mr Bates smell was still there. It smelled of old linen and wood, and of himself. She loved it. That night she slept with it on her pillow and she dreamed he was there with her. Sitting by her side admiring her and smiling. He held her book in his hands and one of the pages was marked. She asked him what page it was and he only said 'Twenty one.'

XXXXXX

John held his jacket in the darkness. She was still all over it. This couldn't be, this couldn't happen. How could he have let himself fall under her spell? A man like him! Known for his wisdom and quick wit. He was a dreamer but he never dreamed of the unthinkable, of the forbidden. He was down to earth and simple...how could he let himself become a fool for such thing as passion. He never believed in undying love anyway. Maybe, he had always been wrong.

He threw his jacket away before sitting down on his old thin mattress on the floor. This would have to end. She was going to be married in five days, five! He was old enough to be her father. She was a lady! From a far higher society than him. He had nothing to give her, nothing at all. Not even a proper roof over her head. He was nothing. He was as high as the dirt she walked upon.

What was he thinking when he let himself enjoy her touch, or..._I almost kissed her!_ He thought, enraged with himself. She was just a girl, an innocent girl, how could he have done that to her? She was just confused and he was taking advantage of it. The not so proper dreams he had had...he was a bastard. He deserved nothing but her hatred. Why did she always find her way to his heart?

'Why can't she be happy with what she has?'

'Happiness, most of the times, is what we want not what we have.' His thoughts had been whispered and caught by his sister's ear. She walked towards him in the darkness, holding a candle in her hand. 'It's Miss Anna Smith, isn't it?'

'Oh Mary. I am a stupid, stupid man.'

'You are a good man and she knows it.'

'No! Don't you understand? I'm good for us, not for her. Look at me, Mary. Sleeping on the floor for the lack of a room, while you sleep with the children in bed. What do I have to offer anyone? My old years and my disgrace?'

'You have your kindness to give, your wisdom. But not to her. Find a woman for youself John. Find a decent caring woman and forget that Miss of yours. For your own good. She'll drive you mad.'

'You don't understand...I don't want any woman. I never did.' He looked up sighing. 'I didn't even want Vera, you know that. I never had the need.'

'You were ever the charming young man. I was only a child but I remember well, father telling you off because you promised yourself to more than a girl at once.' She smiled trying to cheer him up, and she did, only for a moment. He smiled remembering those years of his life.

'Mary, it was just for the fun of it. I never dreamed of any of them, never longed for them. Never wanted any of them for myself, just a kiss and a bit of fun behind the crates...that's all I wanted.' Mary blushed at his words but let him continue. 'And with Vera, well...you know. She didn't have anyone else...I felt it was my duty, and I did as my conscience told me. And I don't regret it.'

'You loved her?'

'No...but she gave me William.'

'She loved you though.'

'She did...and my only regret is that I couldn't love her back.' He thought of his words. Would it happen to Anna? Would she regret it for all her life? He didn't want her to. Regret was like a poison. It killed your body and soul little by little and there was no cure, not when the one to apologise to was already dead.

'You have two options, John. Two options.' He looked at her questioningly. 'Either you tell her what you feel and let her decide or you forget her and live the rest of your days pretending this mad passion never happened. Which one would you regret less, brother?'

For the first time in his life, John Bates didn't have an answer. He wanted Anna, yes he did, more than everything, more than ever. She was the first woman he had ever dreamed o,f but he wouldn't forgive himself if he ruined her life...he was lost.

XXXXXX

'Mr Bates?'

Her white dress shone under the mighty sun and the smile on her lips made him feel at ease. He looked down at the white rose he held in his hand and walked towards her with the intention of giving it to her. She took it without averting her eyes from his and when he leaned down to kiss her she gasped in pain.

The thorns pierced her skin furiously as if the flower had a life of its own. He tried to help her in despair but the more he tried the more her red blood stained her immaculate white dress. They looked at each other and between cries she begged him to stop and leave, and when he did and saw her in the distance, her white dress was clean and the white rose lay on the ground and her hands were healed.

John woke up then, with heavy breathing and an aching heart. His demons were striking and filling him with guilt and he knew all too well what that dream meant. He would have to stay away from her before it was too late. He would have to be strong and stay away before she regretted it.

* * *

_**Next Chapter:**_ _Anna visits the slums and finds something very interesting about her maid, Elsie Hughes. _

_Mary tries to put Anna off her brother, while Mrs Smith tries to convince Charles to take measures against John Bates. In the end Anna's instincts will prove to be the right ones but, will she be able to prevent the worst? _

_Thanks for reading! _


	5. Chapter 5

_**A/N:** Good evening everyone :D Thank you so much for your kind words and support. It means a lot to me! In this chapter Anna visits John but she faces his sister Mary first, which leads to the development of the whole story. I hope you enjoy this chapter. _

_**Disclaimer:** Same as chapter 1-4._

* * *

'Oh God,' she whispered as she went down the darkest alley in the city, which would lead to the slum where John Bates lived. She looked up at the dark buildings closing in on her. Dark, from the lack of sunlight, and dirty...so dirty. Stained clothes hang on rope clotheslines and the cries of children emanated from the houses around her; people sitting on the ground, filthy, smelling of death and rotten flesh, begged for handouts. Anna brought her hand to her face to keep the smell away while the other held the basket. What a terrible smell.

Vacant eyed people, skinny as sticks, milled about her and looked at her as if she were a mere vision. Their mouths were open in awe and she could hear the women talking behind her back, whispering, gossiping.

'Morning Miss.' A woman called out and smiled at her. A kind face among judgemental ones. 'What are you doing here? This is not the place for a lady like you.' It was one of the women she had met at the factory. She had two children with her with smudged faces and sad eyes. Anna tried to avoid looking at their empty eyes and smiled at their mother instead.

'Meg! I...do you know where Mr Bates' house is?'

'Sure I do, miss. We all know each other here. See that corner over there, well, just right after you'll see an old fountain, he lives just in front.'

'Thank you so much, Meg. Have a good day.' Anna took two pieces of pie from the basket and gave each to the children. 'It's apple pie,' she smiled at them and Meg thanked her generously. Apple pie was something they had never heard of, but they ate it as if it were the best luxury in the world.

Not one minute later she saw the fountain. A fountain with no water and she thought how odd that was. _Why did they built it then?_

She knocked on the old door and a feminine voice called from the inside. 'Come in!' and with a deep breath she did as offered.

The room was dark, and she noticed there was only a single small window. Anna entered and saw in one corner a dark haired woman sitting in an old chair with a child in her arms.

'Good afternoon...'

Mary stood up propping her child on her hip and walked towards her, and when the faint light from that one window hit Anna's face, she stopped in her tracks and looked at her in confusion.

'I...I'm Anna Smith. Maybe Mr. Bates mentioned me?'

'Miss Smith?...Of course, miss! I didn't know you were coming.' Her eyes were wide in surprise, as she gestured at the state of the room around her.

'Please! Don't bother because of me. I only brought this basket with food and some flowers for you and the children. As a thank you, for what Mr Bates did for me last night.'

Mary nodded. 'Please, sit down, miss. Would you accept a cup of tea?'

Anna thought for a moment but then she accepted.

'May I hold your baby for you?' Anna had always had a weak spot for children. She had no infants in the family so every time she saw one it caused her heart to melt.

'Thank you, miss.'

Anna took the baby in her arms and sat down. She spent some time cooing at the little girl who looked up at her, mesmerized by this new person. As Anna looked around the house she saw an old table, five chairs and a thin straw mattress on the floor. There was also a fireplace with an old stove beside it and a small cupboard with some dishes, and one door that Anna imaged led to the bedroom. But only one when there were six people living there? Nothing beyond that, not even a rug on the floor or a bookshelf. The dark and dust were predominant. How could people live with so little?

Mary noticed her wandering eyes, almost scared with what she saw. She placed the mug on the table.

'Who's mattress is that?' Anna asked while caressing the baby's cheeks.

'Brother's. He sleeps there. Me and the children sleep in the bed.'

Anna nodded impressed. 'What's her name?'

'Sara.'

'I know about your...situation. I'm so sorry. It must be hard for you to be without a husband, so young and with children to care for.'

'It is hard, but brother is a big help. I'm lucky to have him.'

'Yes, Mr Bates is a good man.'

'That he is...' Mary nodded staring at Anna. She knew too well why she was talking like that. 'You are here to see him, aren't you? Other than to bring us the basket.'

Anna lowered her eyes. 'Yes, I wanted to thank him personally.'

'And say goodbye?'

'Goodbye?'

'You are going to get married come Sunday...aren't you?'

'Yes.' Anna's face fell in disappointment.

'I've never seen such an unhappy bride, if you'll excuse me for saying so, miss.'

'Did you marry for love Mrs...?'

'Bates...'

'Bates? I thought you were married.' Anna was confused.

'We didn't have money to wed, just like most of these poor souls here. My wedding day was when I found out I was pregnant with my George. After that it's certain.'

'But you loved your...partner?'

'Yes... I loved _my husband_ very much.'

'Well then, you wouldn't understand my misery.'

'You are making your own misery, miss.' Mary sat down exasperated. 'Look around you...this is misery. Would you give up your fancy clothes and vast rooms for this?'

'I don't understand...'

'You do. You're smarter than you show. This is what my brother has to give. See what he sleeps on...would you sleep there too?'

Anna looked down embarrassed and tried to defend herself pretending to be entertained by the baby's flailing. She smiled down at the child but her smile failed to reach her eyes and her soul.

'I don't mean to be rude miss but...the decision you make will live with you forever. If you choose to follow your heart and then regret it, do you think your grand society will take you back? After being dishonour by a man with no more than a straw mattress to sleep upon?'

'Mrs Bates...I'm not as weak as you make me.'

Mary experienced a fit of coughing before she was able to continue to speak. 'My brother has been in a state because of you. You are making him lose his mind and that's not good for any of us...'

'Well, he has done the same with me, Mrs Bates,' Anna said sulkily. Mary's words had cut her deep and she had to flex her jaw not to give away her hurt.

'What does your maid say about it?'

'My maid?'

'Elsie Hughes, isn't she your maid?' Mary began coughing again and Anna looked down trying to avoid Mary's embarrassed eyes.

'She is but...what does she have to do with it.'

'Hasn't she read your palm?'

'My palm?'

'Your hand, Miss. Your fortune.'

'I didn't know she read...palms…?'

'Well, she used to, people would pay her a chilin to do so. My late mother used to...and she was always right. They would call her Reader. Elsie Reader'

'She never talks about her past. I didn't know...'

'Maybe she doesn't want to remember it...' Mary raised her brow. 'I wouldn't, after everything...'

'Everything? What is...everything?'

Just as Mary was going to answer, the door opened and John entered. He looked almost stricken when he laid eyes on Anna and quickly looked at his sister in search of an answer.

'Miss Smith was kind enough to bring us a basket, as a thank you for what you did last night.'

Anna stood up and handed the baby to Mary. 'Your girl is lovely, Mrs Bates.' then she turned her eyes toward Mr. Bates, looking shyly up at him. 'Good afternoon, Mr Bates.'

'You shouldn't be here.'

'I just wanted to thank...'

'You already did last night... we don't need charity.'

'It's not charity, Mr Bates, it's a kindness.'

He nodded 'You should go now.'

Anna glanced at Mary for a second and smiled sadly, 'I won't be hurt by your words Mr Bates. I know you are trying to put me off. You don't have to though...your sister did that job for you.'

'Put you off? I don't understand.' He looked at Mary and she knew her brother would tell her off once Miss Smith was gone.

'I'm sorry if I've caused you any trouble. It was not my intention, truly...I must be going.'

'Do you want me to escort you? Do you know the way?'

'Thank you, Mr Bates, but I don't need your charity,' Anna said bitterly and John cursed himself when he realised that his foolish words had offended her good intentions.

Without a last glance she quickly made her way out, leaving him behind with his regret. He looked down at his feet, trying to think a way to redeem himself.

'You should kill any hope before its roots scar too deep, John.''

And in a flash he was after Anna, running as fast as he could. He saw her in the distance and called. 'Miss!' But she didn't turn to look at him and he saw that she rushed her steps. 'Anna!'

She stopped then, her breath caughting in her throat and her heart thrumming in her chest. She felt his hand on her wrist and turned to face him.

'Why did you come?'

'I wanted to see you!'

'Why?'

'Because I love you Mr Bates! I know it's not lady like to say it but...I don't care. I love you.'

Everything around them grew silent to their ears, even the crying children allowed them a moment of introspection.

'You don't know what you are saying. You are too young...too inexperienced.'

'Too young to feel love, Mr Bates, is that it?'

'Too young to understand! Too young to see the consequences of this madness.'

'Madness? Am I too young to dream of you day and night? Too young to dream of your kiss and your touch?

'Don't say such things...' He looked around. 'Someone will hear you?'

'The one I want to have my attention doesn't care for it at all, and I shall scream it to you until it's marked upon your flesh that I love you and that I am not as weak as you think I am. Your sister did a wonderful job of telling me how wrong this is but...I don't care one bit for what she says. In fact, the whole world could be against me at this moment and still...I wouldn't care.'

John was in shock at her words and determination, and he loved her so much for that. But still, it didn't make him feel any better about their situation.

'I am nothing! A nobody...I have nothing to offer, nothing to live or die for. I am a man from another world... a world you wonder and romanticise about.' He smiled sadly. 'I am nothing but one of the fairytales you read...but our ending won't be happy if you don't stop tormenting me.'

She pushed him away making him let go of her arm. 'Who's tormenting who, Mr Bates? I was born and raised in status, my life was all decided and I had nothing to complain about...you're the one who's making me question everything I was brought up to believe.'

'I'll take all the fault you want me to bear, but please...go. Forget me and be happy, please.'

'Don't you think I've tried?' Her voiced caught in a sob as her tears slid down her cheeks. 'I can't. Not ever. The only ruin I recognise is to be without you!'

'You should...you must! I am nothing.'

'You may be nothing to yourself but you are everything to me. Tell me you don't love me and I promise you...you'll be nothing but an unfulfilled dream...one of the many I'll have through my life.'

He looked down at ground avoiding her demanding eyes. His heart started breaking long before the words left his mouth. 'I don't love you.'

'John Bates...you are a terrible, terrible liar and I hate you for that!'

She ran away down the dark lane and soon she was out of sight. Bringing his hands to his face he cursed himself into his palms. Why was he doing this to her? To them?

He shouldn't have said it. In all his wasted gallantry he had never been more regretful in his life.

'_If only I could tell you that I love you more than life itself.' _

Slowly he made his way home, tired, crestfallen, weak. A shadow of the proud man he had always been. He raised his eyes when he felt the presence of her sister behind him, patting his shoulder, letting him know she would help him in his heartbreak.

'What did you tell her?' he asked slowly.

'I just told her to look around and imagine herself living here.'

'You didn't have the right,' his voice was barely audible, as if all his strength had vanished when Anna was no longer there.

'I had every right! You are my brother and I only want to see you well.'

'It's not your place to say such things to a lady...'

'Why is that? Is she too important for us now? You, who always said we are as good as them...and now you are telling me it's not my place to say such things to a lady like her?'

He sighed tiredly, 'I just don't want you to speak like that to her.'

'But you can...'

'It's different!'

Mary rolled her eyes. 'Don't worry John, she won't come back. She won't choose you over a life of pampering.'

'I hope you are right.' But he didn't, not really. He hoped she was very wrong. But how could he hope such a thing? The conflict in his mind was driving him over the edge of sanity. His head ached and he felt dizzy.

'But you don't, do you? Why are you so upset when this was what you wanted?'

His sister was a fool, he thought. This is not what he wanted. He wanted her, Anna Smith. He wanted her and nothing else. And now that she was gone the need for her was unbearable. He felt like a boy, a silly childish boy who only wants what he can't have and wants it all the more when it's gone.

'Where's my jacket?'

'I washed it.'

'You what?'

'It was as dirty as the children feet.'

He was possessed. He hoped he could still have her scent for a bit longer. But now even that was gone. The presence of her body had been washed away with water and soap as if it were nothing but simple dirt. He remembered now, he had left it on the floor last night...'Next time you ask me before you wash my things, Mary! Where's the children?'

'They are at Mrs Oliver's, playing with her sons. Why?'

'I'm going out.'

'Where?'

'Out!'

And before she could ask him twice he was gone.

XXXXXX

'Are you sure, Charles?'

He nodded while he sipping his tea. 'I told one of my men to follow her every step. She's at his house now.'

'I can't believe it...' Mrs Smith shook her head, incredulous. 'I thought this was all up to her stubborn ways, she always found pleasure in doing the opposite of what I said...but I could never imagine...' she sighed, exasperated. 'Not that man... A mill worker? Oh my God, I knew she would be my death.'

'She doesn't want to marry me, Mrs Smith. And honestly, I don't want her to go up the aisle as if she were facing the gallows.'

'But Charles, what you want me to do? To let her free to do as she wishes? She's my daughter!'

'I am ready to take her knowing she loves another man, I am...but...I need to be sure she'll forget him, Mrs Smith. I can't live my life loving a woman who doesn't love me back. I can't live in fear that she'll run to him whenever I'm not home.'

'You and your foolish speech of love...Is that what you've been learning in school these days?' Charles looked down sheepishly. 'I know of something that will make her forget that man,Charles'

'And what's that?'

'An ambush.'

'An ambush?'

'She'll forget him if he's dead. Hire men to do the job. Men you trust. Tell them to kill him fast and get rid of the body.'

'I am sorry but...I can't pay for someone's death.'

'Don't you want to marry my daughter? Well then...that's the only way. He's a nothing, Charles, no one will notice he's gone. What difference will it make in God's world if one less of that kind is six feet under?' She wasn't asking him. She was telling him he had to do it. Telling him she knew for sure this was for the better. Charles' eyes widened, he never expected such words would come out of Mrs Smith's mouth, but then...she was known for many things and one of them was the gift of persuasion.

Not long after Charles had left, Anna arrived home, breathing heavily with an upset look on her face. She was about to climb the stairs that led to her room when her mother stopped her.

'Where have you been?'

Anna brought her hand to her chest. 'Mother, you gave me a fright!' She took a deep breath before continuing, 'I went for a walk in the park. Aren't I allowed?'

'Not alone you're not.'

'I didn't take long, did I?'

'You took long enough...' Her mother eyed her from head to toe. 'You missed your fiance.'

'I thought I wouldn't see him anymore until the wedding.'

'Well, because he cares for you, he came to see how you were doing after last night. And you should show him your appreciation.'

'I don't appreciate it.'

They faced each other for a moment, both gauging the other's thoughts, as if they were written on their foreheads. They were not and in this case, her mother's victory was granted.

'You are not to leave this house until you have his ring in your finger.'

'Whyever not?' Anna questioned desperately raising her voice.

'If you weren't to be wed in five days I would get out the switch. I know very well where you were! You shameless liar. You were with that man...Bates.' She spat out his name with contempt.

Anna looked at her mother in fright. _How did she know?_

'That's what I did wrong...I didn't hit you enough when you were a child. If I had done what my mother...'

'I would have become a cold hearted person just like you and God knows I would rather be dead than turn out like you, Mother!'

The slap came out of nowhere and hit Anna like thunder. No warning, just the shock and noise. The pain of it burned into her.

'Go to your room! Now!'

Anna ran up the stairs, one hand in her cheek, trying to stop the tears sliding down her face. Her sobs echoed through the mansion and Elsie came to her aid.

An aid that was no more than advice. 'You have no right to talk to your mother like that Miss. You owe her respect.'

'Why should I respect someone who never respected me, Elsie?'

'Miss. She's your mother!'

'Does that give her the right to treat me as property? I am a person, Elsie. I have feelings of my own, whether she wants it or not. She should respect that.'

Elsie sighed, 'Mother's rights are different than daughter's...you will understand that when you have your own children.'

'I will never be as bitter as she is, never. Hard life grows place for empathy, is that not what they say? Well, they are wrong! Her parents did the same thing to her and she hated it. She's unhappy until this day and that's what she wants for me?'

'Hard life grows place for revolt...that's the right saying.'

Anna sat up on her bed and brought her knees up to wrap her arms around them. Resting her chin on them she sighed sadly.

'Mr Bates and his sister tried to put me off.'

'For the better, I reckon.'

'I told him that I love him.'

'Miss! You shouldn't have.'

'He said he didn't love me but his eyes betrayed his words.' _His nerves, his sweaty brow, the way his voice trembled. His whole self betrayed him. '_I saw it. You should have heard him...the way he spoke. He didn't look me in the eye, not in the way he usually does. He avoided me and when I left..he stayed there...lingering in a moment he could no longer have.'

'He knows the wrong in all this, Miss. He knows it and he wants it far from his life. It'll only bring him trouble. Think Miss...if your mother slaps you for the truth...imagine what she'll do if she finds out about this secret?'

'Father would sack him, that's for sure.'

Elsie's laugh made Anna frown in confusion. 'If that was the only repercussion Mr Bates would be a lucky man! Do you really think the Missus would allow him to have you? Safe and sound?'

'Mother may be bitter and cold and even cruel but she would never...'

'You are still so young Miss, there's so many things you don't know.' She caressed Anna's cheek. A gesture that was so foreign to Anna from her own mother. 'Not for long...my child...your innocence won't remain forever.'

'What do you mean Elsie? Why do you always speak in riddles?'

'Full words leave no place for quest...without quest there's no life. Now rest miss, I'll bring you something to eat later.'

'There's one more thing Elsie...' Anna gave a small smile. 'I know you used to read fortunes. To read one's hand...Mr Bates' sister told me.'

Elsie smiled back at her. 'And so there it is. You are already finding out past things.'

'Can you read my hand, Elsie? Read my hand and tell me where my luck...tell me if you see John Bates in my future.'

'As you grow older you'll learn that some things should never be done twice...I was a mill worker once, who read fortunes to earn a little extra, now I'm a maid to a daughter of high society and I earn enough for my sustenance .'

'Please Elsie...please!'

The maid shook her head and exited the room, leaving Anna's hand stretched out in the air. Slowly, she brought her hand to her heart and her tears threaten to fall once again. Everyone she knew and loved were making her feel so awfully alone. Even him, especially him.

XXXXXX

A new day always brought new chances and the prospect for something better, _and maybe today was that day_, Anna thought as she stretched her body from another night of restless sleep.

For the past two days she had been at home, looking out of her window and seeing people outside living their lives normally. How many of those people, walking around in long dresses and parasols, fancy morning suits and billycocks, had a lost love or were unhappy with their arranged marriages?

She looked down at her hands to find her poetry book opened.

'Page twenty one,' she whispered, as she caressed the page with her fingertips.

**'_When age chills the blood, when our pleasures are past_**

**_For years fleet away with the wings of the dove _**

**_The dearest remembrance will still be the last,_**

**_Our sweetest memorial, the first kiss of love.'_**

**_\- The First Kiss of Love – Lord Byron, 1806_**

The poem unsettled her. Poetry usually made her feel better, but this time it was far from it. Somehow she felt sick and dizzy. She threw the book aside and stood up from her window seat. Why was this happening now? Everything in her life was falling apart and now a simple poem was making her feel terribly ill.

From the corner of her eye she caught sight of her image in the mirror, and slowly she approached it. How many times had she adorned and admired herself in this mirror? And for what? How she wished that all those hours passed seeing her figure had been for him.

Suddenly, as in a dream, she saw an older version of herself. Bittered by time with loveless dark eyes. The memories of him were still there but she had nothing to remember but pain. Not his words of love, not even a kiss. Everything had turned against her and she was cold as stone, lifeless and meaningless. She was wearing black and somehow, even though her heart was stone it ached terribly for the part of her that was missing. The pain she felt was out of this world. It took her breath away. His presence was gone, definitely gone, as if he had existed a lifetime ago. As if he was not anymore and then...suddenly, she understood. Her older eyes shouted at her younger true self of his absence. An absence that had been for years. An absence that made her almost forget the kindness of his smile and the tenderness of his eyes. An absence older than time.

She shook her head to clear it. Fright and unshed tears filled her eyes. No! She felt every single rush of pain through her bones and veins. Every bit of sorrow, regret and mourning. She felt a lifetime of misery and emptiness. She felt him dead.

XXXXXX

The house echoed with her running down the stairs and Elsie came to inspect the sound.

'Miss?' she questioned her as Anna put on her hat.

'I need to...' Anna tried to whisper.

'Where do you think you are going?'

'Mother! I am going for a walk.' She faked a smiled.

'You have a short memory, Anna. I told you, you would only leave this house to go up the aisle.'

'Mother, please, you can't be serious...'

'I am. You are going to wed after tomorrow...you won't die for one day, will you?'

'Mother please I beg you! Elsie will accompany me.'

Elsie widen her eyes in shock but she said nothing. The last thing she wanted now was to make things worse.

'You really think I am stupid, child? Don't you think I know Elsie knows about your love affairs? Your secrets? Don't you think I know you are going to meet him again?'

Anna and Elsie looked at each other. Guilty eyes and nervous blinks. The maid was not impressed though, she knew her mistress would get at the truth. She knew how smart she could be...she knew it all too well.

'Mother...I don't love Charles…he tried...he kissed me against my will and tried to grab me. That's why I ran that night.' Her eyes were pleading, waiting for something to soften her mother's heart.

'If you think you will make me spare you of your fate you are very wrong. There's no such thing as a groom kissing his bride against her will. You will be his wife! You have to do what he wants. That's your duty.'

'You can't be serious!' Anna shouted.

'Well, I am, and you go up to your room now!'

Anna raised her chin and took a deep breath. 'No! I am not going to my room!'

'Miss..' Elsie pleaded.

'No. You can't make me stay mother.' Anna turned to leave the house but before she could walk past, her mother grabbed her by her wrist.

'You are not going anywhere!'

'You can't stop me mother! I am going to see him whether you want it or not!' She tried to get away from her mother's arms. 'I love him, Mother! Please. Try to understand. There's nothing you can do about it. Nothing!'

'You are going after him like a bitch in heat!'

'Please Mrs Smith.' Elsie tried to calm her down but was pushed aside.

'You stay quiet Elsie! She's not your daughter!' Mrs Smith eyes were red with rage and the maid looked down with tears forming in her eyes. 'Come now,' she pulled at Anna. 'You are not going anywhere!'

'I hate you!' Anna screamed and when Mrs Smith tried to slap her Anna grabbed her hand. 'You are not going to hit me again, Mother. You are not!'

Mrs Smith lost her patience when Anna tried to get herself free from her grasp and pulled her by the hair up the stairs.

'Mother, no, mother! Stop! No, please.' Anna sobbed in pain and revolt for this woman who was more of a torturer than a mother for her.

Elsie followed them in tears, trying to support Anna and prevent her to be dragged.

The servants were watching at the edge of the stairs in terror. Their mouths hanging open in shock.

When the women reached Anna's room, Mrs Smith threw her inside as if she was a broken doll. Anna laid on the floor, her hair down around her tear stained face, her dress crumpled and her heart in pieces.

'Compose her and put her to bed. She doesn't need to eat more today. ' Mrs Smith commanded. 'Oh! And if you dare to leave this house...you might as well never come back,' she finished before slamming the door of the room behind her.

Elsie kneeled on the floor next to Anna and tried to help her up. 'Come on, Miss,' she begged with her face soaked in tears. 'Let's get you cleaned up.'

'She's the devil, Elsie. I saw it in her eyes! She hates me.'

'You don't know what you are saying, Miss, please.'

'She was never...not even once, kind to me...she hates me Elsie. My mother hates me.'

Elsie bathed her in warm water with rose petals. Washed her hair with lavender scent and did it in a beautiful long braid. On the outside Anna was whole but on the inside she was filled with pain and shattered into a million pieces.

Soon after, she was in bed, dressed in her nightgown, and with her doll beside her. 'I wonder what Father will do when he finds out...'

'The Missus talked to him during dinner. He thought it was for the best...you, to stay here until your wedding.'

'She didn't tell him she dragged me by my hair, did she?'

Elsie glanced at her without an answer.

'I saw something... earlier...' Anna sniffed.

'You did? What did you see?' the maid asked as she folded some of Anna's undergarments.

'In the mirror. I saw myself.'

'But of course...'

'No! I saw myself older...I saw in to the future Elsie and...Mr Bates was dead...'

'Oh Miss, it must have been a bad dream.'

'No Elsie, I saw it as I'm seeing you now. It was an older me and I spoke to myself. I felt everything, everything...that's why I need to speak to him...I...I don't know how but...I need to be with him. I can't live without him Elsie and I want to live as much as I can with him. I felt that...if I don't see him today, I'll lose him forever...to death,' she whispered urgently.

'Oh Lord...please, Miss...that is nonsense'

'How can you say that when you used to read fortunes?! You should believe me more than anyone else.'

Elsie stayed silent. Anna watched as her mind wandered. Her maid was lost in past memories, she could see it in her eyes.' Elsie?' she called.

'I am sorry, Miss, I was...'

'Please Elsie...read my hand. I want to know if what I felt was right...I want to know what's in my future. Please!'

'I am sorry Miss, but no. Stop asking. I quit that a long time ago.'

'I demand you to read my palm!' Anna stood up from bed stretching her hand towards the maid. 'You are my maid and you'll do as I say.' She was determined and Elsie saw in her eyes the strength of a girl she didn't know. A girl who had been hidden until the day of the battle. And today was the day. Elsie knew what she had seen was not nonsense at all, she just wanted to protect her but maybe...telling would be her protection from a life of misery.

She took Anna's hand in hers and turned her palm up. Tracing the lines she closed her eyes for a moment, then she stared at her Miss.

'What then? What do you see?'

'You won't marry Mr Charles.' Elsie whispered.

'I won't?!' she laughed. 'What? What else Elsie,' the maid remained in silent for a moment and Anna's smile faded when she saw Elsie's worried frown. 'You are scaring me. Is John Bates in my future?'

'He is. John Bates,' she traced Anna's palm with her fingertips. 'To save him...you'll build your life over your parents ruin. Over their secrets and fears.'

Anna removed her hand from Elsie's with panic written on her face. 'No Elsie...that's not what I asked...'

'You don't question the destiny miss, he tells you everything he knows. Now go.'

'Go where?'

'Go meet him. He needs you. I was wrong...you can't bury your own heart. Go now and what you saw in the mirror will be nothing but a nightmare...but know this...once you go there will be no way back, this will be the first day of the rest of your life, my child.'

'But...it's night!'

'Go! Now!'

* * *

_**Next Chapter: **Anna stops the worst from happening to John and slowly their life together begins. _

_**A/N: **Thank you for reading! And I hope you all have a Happy Christmas! _


	6. Chapter 6

_**A/N:** Good evening everyone! Once again, thank you all so much for your follows, reviews and favourites. You are all so kind to me and I'm glad you are sticking with this fic :) It's so fun to write and knowing that you guys appreciate it is great! Thank you!_

_Hope you all have a good weekend!_

_In this chapter, as promised, we see the beginning of a new life for Anna, and for John as well. There's still trouble ahead of course, but at least, they are together now ;)_

_**Disclaimer:** Same as chapter 1-5._

* * *

Anna ran as fast as she could through the darkness of a moonless night. She had been able to escape out the back kitchen door without making a in a long coat but no hat she tried to make her way through the confusing streets of London. At night everything was worse. The stark silence piercing through her ears and driving her almost to the edge of sanity, only her own heavy breathing and rushed steps following her, as hunters in the wild…that and the battle between fear and courage within her. Then she saw it. The same alley she took when she went to visit him, but before she could duck down the street she heard a strange noise that caught her attention coming from behind her.

Nervously she looked around, trying to understand what was happening when she heard it.

'What are you doing?!' She recognised his voice, of course she did. 'Stop!' was the last she heard before the sound of hitting and clashing came to her ears. She heard gasps and moans and quickly she understood what was going on. She ran to the sound as fast as she could and from behind a brick wall she saw them.

Three men wearing black, hitting him while he laid on the ground, as demonic shadows gathered around him. She saw him trying to defend himself, but although he was a strong man, John Bates' superpowers were no more than a spell of love and definitely not enough for three men.

'Stop!' she screamed as loud as she could. 'Stop! Someone help, please! Help!' She hurried towards them with a braveness she didn't know she had and tried to hit one of them men on the head.

The man turned to look at her; to this small figure of a woman, red eyed and cheeks stained with tears, while holding nothing but her own fists and clenched jaw.

At first he tried to pushed her away but then he stopped when he recognized who she was. His eyes were wide with shock and she looked at him with horrified confusion on her face.

'Thomas!' she screamed in fury and tears. 'What are you doing? Stop!'

'What are you doing here, Miss?' he asked, and as soon and he did his partners in crime ran as fast as they could.

She was past reason and kneeled crying on the ground besides him. John was semi-conscious. Blood covering his clothes and face, and his body shaking in trauma.

'Oh no. What have they done to you?' she sobbed touching his broken body. John looked up at her with confused eyes. She couldn't make out his words. He could barely breathe.

'Shush, Mr Bates. You are going to be alright.' She caressed his hair gently but still he moaned in pain. 'I am sorry my dear, I am so sorry.'

Thomas was still there, unable to move, to make a sound, until her eyes were on him again and she asked him what she already knew.

'Who did this?'

He said nothing.

'Was it my mother?' she asked. And once again he remained silent, but this time the frown and the lowering of his eyes gave away his answer.

'How could you?!' she screamed again and the noise of footsteps approached them. 'You are going to regret it!' Thomas ran away after her furious words, but Anna knew she was not done with him yet.

'Miss Smith?' A group of five men appeared from around the corner and she knew them all. 'What happened?'

'They tried to kill him.'

'Bates!' one of them said with urgent voice. He was one of the employers of her father and John's colleague. 'Oh my Lord. We have to take him home, Miss.'

'Yes please, take him home.'

XXXXXX

'Oh my Lord, what happened?! John!' Mary cried when she opened the door, following the men who took him inside. Gently they placed him on his old mattress on the floor. 'Who did this?!'

'We don't know, Mary...when we arrived Miss Smith was the only one there, the men had run away already.'

Only then Mary noticed Anna at the door, in shock, scared, cold, forlorn as a lost child. 'If she hadn't been there I'm afraid...they would have killed him.'

Anna looked down at her feet, ashamed. After all this was all her fault.

'But why?' Mary kneeled on the floor next to her brother. 'Oh my dear brother...'

'He's a strong man, Mary. He needs to be taken care of and he'll be as good a new soon enough.'

Mary caressed his face ever so gently while she cried, looking at every inch of him, making sure that, at least, he was still in one piece. Then a cry was heard and a child called for her from the darkness of the other room and Mary stood up abruptly.

'I don't want them to see him like this...' But before she could finish her sentence Anna came forward.

'Go and tend to the children, I'll take care of Mr Bates.' Everyone widen their eyes at her bold statement.

'Miss...' one of the men began, but before he could say something else Anna insisted.

'Please, go home, and thank you for your help. I'll take care of him now.'

There was a long moment of staring and uncertainty, thoughts running through everyone's mind until finally the men left, leaving the women alone.

Anna kneeled beside him on the floor and cried upon his appearance. He winced when she reached for him.

'Shush...it's alright,' she whispered.

'They were paid weren't they?' Mary's voice made her jump. 'Brother is not one to put himself in trouble...not like that. They were paid to do it, and I am sure that your father is behind this.'

'You don't know what you are talking about, Mrs Bates.'

'I do, yes! My brother tries to fight for a better life for us and this is what happens...your father is tired of...'

'It wasn't my father! He would never do such thing.'

'Who else then?'

'The Mistress.'

'Your mother?'

'She's not my mother anymore,' Anna said with cold finality.

'But why?'

'I am the reason.'

Mary realisation struck her then, as she understood the meaning behind Anna's words. 'Get out!'

'No. I will take care of him.'

'You are not welcome here!'

'I may not be but you need me, and I'll stay for tonight. Tomorrow I'll bring a doctor to see him.'

'You are going to ruin us all, Miss...you...' But before Mary could finish, she began with a fit of coughing. One after the other.

Anna stood up from her place and rushed to her side, helping her sit down in a chair.

'Are you alright?' Anna asked nervous.

'I am fine.' Mary said trying to push Anna aside.' It's just a little cough. I don't need your help!'

Anna didn't believe her. It wasn't just a little cough, it was more than that, she saw it, in the white handkerchief Mary cleaned her mouth with. A drop of blood. It wasn't just a cold but something much worse. Something that could take her life.

'Go to bed, and rest. Tend to the children...it won't do them good to see Mr Bates like that.'

'How can I trust you?'

'Mrs Bates, I am the reason but not the instigator. I love your brother and that's why I was in the street in the middle of the night. Actually...it was Elsie who told me to come to his aid.' Mary looked at her in surprise. 'She read my fortune.'

Mary calmed down after her words. As if pronouncing the maid's name was some sort of peace handshake.

'I need water and some cloths to clean him. Where can I find some?'

The dark haired woman showed her the way and the two of them stripped him of his bloody clothes. The sight of his skin causing Anna to blush but the will to help him stronger than a foolish feeling made her compose herself right away and soon he was cleaned from all the blood and with fresh night clothes.

'Mummy?' George called, rubbing his sleep away from his eyes.

'Go to bed, I'll take care of him.'

XXXXXX

'Anna?'

She sighed with exasperation. 'It's me John, Mary.'

He opened his eyes slowly and blinked a few times before looking at her, still very much in pain. 'Of course...I just...' Even words were painful to pronounce.

'She was here, you weren't dreaming.'

'She was?'

'Yes. She took care of you all night.' Mary looked up before continuing. 'She saved you.'

'Where is she now?' His voice low and weak.

'She said she wanted to bring you something and also change. You know, they change five or six times a day.' Her voice was mocking. 'She'll be back. Now you rest. She'll bring a doctor as well, to see you, she said she would pay. '

'There's no...'

'Please, John...if she's willing to care for you let her. You are in no position to refuse medical assistance.'

He nodded with extreme difficulty. 'Where are the children?'

'I sent them to Mrs Oliver's. I don't want them to see you like this.'

Before she could speak again, he fell asleep into the healing rest he needed. His ailing body and bloody wounds still very much opened and stinging. Mary touched his forehead and she realised his temperature was too high, and for the first time she hoped that Miss Smith wouldn't take too long to come back.

XXXXXX

Anna rushed to the stairs as fast and she could, trying not to make a sound. She entered her room and looked around trying to find her loyal book. Mr Bates would enjoy some poems, she thought. Maybe it would cheer him up if she read some for him.

Then she walked towards her wardrobe and opened it, in the hopes of finding an easy enough dress for her to dress by herself, but to her surprise all her clothes were gone.

Her breath caught upon the sight and she could almost see what had happened during the night.

'What are you doing here?' The voice behind her struck her like thunder, strong and sudden and with all the bitterness that it could possibly hold.

She turned around to see her mother, or better, this woman who was no more than a vulture, dressed in black, matching the dark circles under her eyes.

'Actually, I was expecting you,' she added a moment later. 'I knew your shameless self would show up, trying to pretend nothing happened.'

'I'm not going to pretend.' Anna replied with a firm voice.

'Good.' Mrs Smith walked further into the room, rounding Anna like a predator. 'I told you, you would not come back to this house if you left to see him...and you did.' She talked as if she was making all the sense in the world. 'You did...and after everything I've done for you...

'What? What have you done for me? Dress and feed me? Offer me no love whatsoever! Why don't I remember the times you hugged me or kissed me? Or the times you told me stories or played with me? Elsie was the only one who cared, my maid! You did nothing for me expect put me in this world. A world that you turned into hell! I doubt you held me when I was born!'

'Silence!'

'And then...last night...you tried to kill the one I love the most!'

'What?'

'Don't you think I know what you did? You have a stone for a heart, Mrs Smith, and I am ashamed to be your daughter.'

'Get out, you outcast!'

'Tell me...I want to hear it from you.' Anna demanded raising her voice,

'I did it,' the older woman said with the same demand and rage. 'And I would do it again! And if I knew I would have payed for your death as well so I could be spared of this heartbreak! Be spared of this embarrassment.'

'You wicked creature!' Anna whispered in shock.

'You ungrateful bastard! After everything I've done for you?! You were nothing, I should have never taken you in. And now you shall live as you were born. As a rat in the middle of the filthy!'

'What do you mean? Taken in? What you mean!' Anna shouted, demanding more answers. Answers Mrs Smith was not willing to give, the better to haunt Anna throughout her life.

'I gave you all the chances to be someone but you were most ungrateful, and now you shall be punished for that. Get out! Get out of this house and never come back! Get out!' The woman pushed her out of the room and Anna almost tripped down the stairs. She ran into the door, and for one last time they looked at each other.

'Whatever is the matter?' Elsie's voice broke the awful spell between them.

Mrs Smith faced the maid head on. 'She choose her fate and now she'll live by it.'

But Anna knew that better than anyone else and with all the pride that she had left she raised her chin, brought her book close to her chest and bid Elsie goodbye.

XXXXXX

'Miss?' Elsie called as she ran to catch up Anna through the garden fence.

Anna looked up from her shadow. 'Elsie!' She had tears in her eyes.

'Oh Miss...I warned you this would happen, didn't I?'

Anna smiled slowly. 'I knew this would happen, Elsie, I knew it and I'll face it with my head high. I'm not afraid. All I want now is for Mr Bates to recover.'

'But?'

'But...I can't believe she's so...unloving.' She looked down thinking for a moment. 'What did she mean when she said she should never had taken me in?'

'What?' Elsie raised her brow, perplexed.

'Is there anything that you know that I don't? Please...'

'She was upset Miss, she didn't think when she said it.'

'Yes, Elsie...that's exactly what happened. She didn't think...and when one doesn't think the truth comes out more easily. There's no time to filter your thoughts, your words... What did she mean, Elsie?'

'The Mistress wanted to hurt you and she succeeded didn't she? Don't think about it, Miss.'

Anna sighed deeply sniffing a tear away. 'I need a favour.' She peeked between the metal posts. 'Can you send a message to Dr Clarkson? Tell him to come to Mr Bates... house?'

'I couldn't Miss.'

'Come on, Elsie. Do it for me, will you. Please.'

'I'll send Peter with instructions then...' Anna nodded.

'Do you know where my dresses are?'

'The Mistress sent them to Mr Bates house, I'm afraid.'

'Good.' Anna thought for a moment. 'I better go. If she sees you talking to me she'll take it on you...Thank you Elsie. For everything.'

'I'll be praying for you,' the maid said between tears.

'I know.'

XXXXXX

'What on Earth, Amelia! Have you gone mad?'

'I have yes! I've been mad since that girl was born!'

'Whatever you say...I want my daughter here with me!'

'Do you? Do you really? Your ruined daughter?' Mrs Smith said following her upset husband to his office.

'Ruined?' He stopped abruptly and turned to look at her.

'She spent the night out. With that...' she huffed in disgust. 'Did you know that? Mrs Carter sent me a note asking if everything was alright, because her maid saw… that girl coming home at dawn.' Her eyes were wide and sure that truth and right were on her side.

Mr Smith eyed his wife with a concerned look.

'She's ruined. You know Mrs Carter, she'll tell everyone before tea! A young woman like her spending the night out...in that place.'

'Surely she wouldn't do anything that would risk her...'

'Maybe she did nothing like that, but they don't care. If she spent the night out she was up to no good, and her honour is lost.'

He sighed heavily and sat down at his desk, furrowed brow and one hand on his forehead in concentration and worry, trying to understand what was happening.

'And that ungrateful didn't even give us the time to call off the wedding.' Mrs Smith fiddled with her many rings.

The man sighed impatiently. 'She gave us all the time, Amelia...we just didn't hear her.'

'Oh yes. She did. She's been over her heels for that man who works in the dammed factory. Do you think we should have heard her? Oh yes, Mr...Bates or whatever his name is, of course you can marry our only daughter and be the sole heir of our mighty business. And all this just right under your eyes!'

'I never saw him taking liberties with her, Bates...he's a headache yes but, he seems a very honourable man.'

'Who stole your daughter away! I hope you'll take your measures towards him, Simon! You have to sack him, and be sure he doesn't work ever again!'

'Yes, yes… Of course. I'll teach him a lesson. Don't worry. He won't be laughing at this I assure you!'

'What will become of us now?!' she lamented pursing her lips. 'We'll be a laughing stock. I knew that girl would bring us shame and misfortune.'

Mr Smith looked at his wife under his heavy brow.

'What? Are you forgetting that there's more than one hundred people invited for tomorrow? Family, friends, business partners and some of them yet to be. How can we face them? People will look at us and laugh.'

'That's the least of my worries, Amelia. I'm more concerned about my daughter at the moment.'

'Oh yes, you are because you don't go out and face society. You spend all day in that damned factory while I'm here, thrown at the world. You'll see… I'll be invited for tea only to talk about our shame, if I will be invited at all. Or do you think they'll appreciate my company as they used to? They won't! They are wicked and severe with everyone. I know, I participate. And church...' she smiled ironically. 'I doubt I'll be granted blessings once it reaches Reverend Travis' ears.'

'Can you please stop moaning at once! You should be worried about Anna being there, in that place, and not about those peacocks who only talk to you because of your pearls and hats.'

'How dare you?!' she chided, visibly hurt.

'I will send notes to everyone with our apology, saying that the wedding won't be happening. That's all we can do now...' He sighed, tired. 'I'll do that later.'

'With what excuse?'

'Mrs Carter will spread the excuse, won't she?'

'And everything else? The banquet, the flowers, everything?!'

'Reverend Travis will appreciate the food for the poor and the flowers for the church.' Mr Smith said standing from his chair and leaving the room.

'Where are you going?'

'I'm going to see Charles...I need to tell him this...face to face.'

'Dear God.'

'And...' he began turning abruptly towards his wife. 'This, this is all thanks to you.'

'To me?!'

'If you weren't so harsh on her...since she was a child...if you didn't have so many rules and forbidden things...she wouldn't have the need to elope like this.'

'I tried to talk to her, to make her stay, but she didn't hear me! It's not my fault.' Mrs Smith tried to deceive her husband, knowing that he would never forgive her if he knew she was the one forcing Anna from their lives.

He nodded heavily eyeing her with doubt. 'If you say so…'

XXXXXX

'He's a stupid man. After everything I've done for his daughter… and he says this is all my fault! Does he even understand how hard it is to raise girls? If only she had been a boy...' She lowered her voice, resentment filling her lungs as she spoke. 'If only my son had survived instead.'

Elsie was silent while she handed her Mistress some linen. Her eyes were fixed on the pattern of the carpet and her lips pursued.

'Don't you agree?'

'I would rather stay silent, Madam.'

'I bet you would. But you have to agree with me when I say that she's ungrateful.'

'She doesn't know, Madam...she doesn't know what she should be thankful for.'

Mrs Smith shot her a dreadful look and Elsie bowed down apologetic. 'I'm sorry, Madam...is there anything else you need?'

'I'll need some tea.'

'I'll ask Susan to bring you some.'

'No. You will bring me tea. You have no protection now, you will serve me from now on.'

'As you wish Madam. It is very kind of you that you allow me to stay, still.'

'Yes...I've always been very kind to you. I hope you never forget it.'

'No, Madam, I will never forget what you did. Never.'

'Hot and without honey. Don't forget.'

XXXXXX

'I was worried he would have some broken ribs but it doesn't look like it. Maybe fractured but not broken. Which is not to say that he doesn't need to be careful and move as little as possible.'

'And his temperature?' Mary asked.

'There's the risk of infection but if you do everything as I said, he should be fine. Clean his wounds daily and feed him well. Broth and bread, and plenty of fat milk. If he runs a temperature bath him with cold water and if it doesn't drop you call me again.'

The two women nodded. 'Thank you so much, Doctor. We'll do everything as you've told us,' said Anna.

'I'm sure...' the Doctor remarked with hesitation. 'Miss Smith, may I have a word?'

'Of course.'

They both stepped outside as the doctor looked around to be sure they were alone.

'Is it true...what they are saying?'

'What are they saying?' Anna raised her chin and pursed her lips.

'That...you are living here now?'

She sighed and nodded quickly, looking down at her hands, realising that, probably, all England would know by midnight about the ruination of the Smiths.

'I don't understand. Weren't you to marry Charles Johnson tomorrow?'

'That's why I'm here. I've run from that façade. It was against my will and...I would either marry him or be an outcast, as Mrs Smith put it...so I chose.'

'And are you sure this is the right option. Look at them...I've talked about broth and fat milk and Mrs Bates face fell to her feet. They have nothing, Miss...nothing but their own nose.'

'I'd rather have nothing than have everything while others boss my nose around.'

They both smiled awkwardly.

'I have a great regard for you.' He gave her a small smile. 'I've been your doctor since you were born. I've seen you grow into the beautiful young lady you are today. Whenever you need me, send me a note, and I'll come.'

'That's very kind of you Doctor Clarkson. Thank you.'

XXXXXX

Mary brought her old shawl closer to her shoulders. 'I've heard what the doctor said.'

'It's rude to eavesdrop.' Anna stated.

Mary rolled her eyes unamused. 'Where will you be sleeping tonight?'

'Mrs Bates, please, what did I do for you to dislike me so much?'

Mary looked towards her sleeping brother and then back at Anna. 'I see,' Anna sighed. 'I am ever so sorry that I fell in love with you brother, but...I speak from the heart when I say that it happened without my full knowledge. I know you understand.'

'Do I?'

'I thought you loved...your husband.'

'Of course I loved him! Very much.'

'Well then, you understand me. Did you ask to love him? Did you look at him and decide that you would do everything to fall for him? No one does, actually... they do, they try, but it never works. I know it from experience. It never works when you try to persuade your own heart. One's feelings are free and know no rules or laws. It just happen, and that's how it should be.'

'The children will be sleeping over Mrs Oliver.' Mary said slowly. 'She was kind enough to ask if I needed some time without them. I think it's wise to keep them there, I don't want them playing around when John needs quiet and rest and I don't want them to see him like that. No child should see such a sight.'

'That's very wise yes. They are too young to understand.'

'I have some old blankets in my room...I don't know what else to offer. Surely you don't want to share a bed with me.'

'No, I wouldn't want to be an imposition in your own bed. God knows I already am in your house. I'll accept the blankets and sleep here, on the floor.'

Mary shook her head in exasperation to herself. 'You should sleep in the bed. After all I suppose, you are a guest. John wouldn't like you sleeping on the...'

'I'll sleep here, it's decided.'

'You are very stubborn.'

Anna shrugged her shoulders and followed Mary to the room. They found some old blankets in the back of a very old wardrobe. The dark room smelled damp and its walls were covered in mold. Anna could see some cockroaches running away from the candlelight as they took the blankets out, and cringed a little at the sight.

'I told you… I thought I had put you off, I really did. You even told him I had made a wonderful job.' Mary spoke as she helped Anna shaking the dust from the rough material.

'I said you had made a wonderful job...I didn't say you had been successful.'

'I can store your dresses in here if you want. They'll be better here than in those bags.'

'No...' Anna said looking over the three big bags her mother had sent. 'I have plans for them.'

XXXXXX

The night was extremely cold, although it was summer, she didn't know why. The house was dark during the day but at night, the old ripped curtains invited the moonlight to come in as a special guest, casting an almost supernatural spell upon the walls. Anna shifted on the floor, awfully uncomfortable, and punched a very thin pillow against the floor in hopes to make it at least usable. It didn't matter how many times she did it, though, she could feel every crack and every bump against her _posh_ back.

She could hear Mary coughing every now and then; a very much annoying cough that she was sure was accompanied with blood, just like before. And also the noises of the dogs barking outside and wild cats. She could almost feel every kind of insect crawling over her and she had to close her eyes to distract herself for a moment; fear and panic haunting her and making her forget the reason why she had chosen this fate for herself.

But then, she heard him, calling her name in the night. A whisper so soft she thought for a moment it was all from her mind playing with her. But he called again, a bit louder this time, followed by a low breath and a wince of pain.

'Mr Bates?' She kneeled beside his mattress measuring his temperature with the palm of her hand. Touching him as softly as his first whisper.

'You might start calling me John.' He smiled softly as best as he could, and she smiled back at him. 'You are a mad woman,' he said between slow breaths.

'I am mad for you, yes.'

He smiled again and tried to shake his head in disapproval. 'You shouldn't.'

'I know that.'

'Your wedding is tomorrow.'

Anna laughed quietly. 'Do you really think I'm going to attend?'

'You being here...it'll be your ruin.'

'Mr Bates...I'm past that. I don't care about all that nonsense. I told you, my ruin is to be without you.'

He sighed. 'You don't know what awaits you, Anna.'

'I don't. You are right. I've been on this floor for less than two hours and my body is complaining about it already...I know it won't be easy, but...if you are by my side I can face anything.'

'You saved me. I remember that.'

'It was a selfish act,' she joked.

'Thank you.'

She smiled before standing up and reaching for the book she had placed on the table.

'I've brought my book,' she told him, sitting back besides him. 'The poetry one.'

'Your loyal companion...'

'Yes. Do you want me to read for you?'

'I would like that very much.'

She kept on reading through the night. One poem after the other as he asked for more. The sound of her voice in the dark, her soft words echoing in his ears, as if this was no more than one of his many dreams of her. He would open his eyes from those beautiful dreams now and then, and she would be there, in the same room as him, and she would be as real as he was. His eyes would take in every feature of her face as the sweet gentle moonlight bathed her in a glorious spell. She would smile at him shyly, whenever she caught him staring, but as composed as she could possibly be she would return to her reading, as if she were some sort of angelic orator, bringing him all the peace he needed in this time of doubts and insecurities.

John was still too weak to sit or move more than a simple shift but when the light of the moon began to drop low as the morning came, he reached for her hands with one of his own and caressed her fingers.

'As troubled as all this situation is...' he began slowly, almost teary. 'I am glad you are here.'

She said nothing because she didn't know how to respond to that. For the first time he admitted he wanted her with him and although she already knew that, for she could see it written all over his face, his words gave her even more courage. All the courage she would need, and with that, she squeezed his battered hand gently with her own, enjoying the feeling of his warm and long fingers enveloping her both hands completely.

'I should sleep and so should you,' she said a moment later, when she couldn't take his eyes and his warmth anymore, as her own feelings for him frightened her a little.

'Yes.' He dragged the word between his teeth. 'We should sleep.'

And soon and without any more problems or sore limbs or fears in her mind, she fell into a peaceful deep sleep, while he stared at her golden hair cascading down her back, now embedded in the early rays of sunlight. He looked at her one last time, as she lay there sleeping as if she were a fairy princess in a tall, cold tower, protected by a spell that would only be broken by love.

He sighed before joining her in her dreams. He already loved her so much, and the spell was already broken, so why was she still sleeping in darkness and doubt?

XXXXXX

In another house, a mother cried. She cried for this so loved child that never belonged to her, not truly, and yes, she would never forget the pain and hardship. She was not thankful, not one bit. She was filled with revolt and hatred, for the one who promised to protected her child from everything; for the one who promised to care and love and never fail her. But all promises had been broken, long since the first day they were made and until the last. And she would not forgive her, not ever.

* * *

_**Next Chapter:** Anna continues to deal with her choices and trying to understand the meaning behind Mrs Smith's words. Meanwhile John's still recovering in bed when an unexpected visitor knocks at their door. _

_Thank you for reading!_


	7. Chapter 7

_**A/N:** I am so sorry for the delay, but now this fic is rolling again! I wanted to organise myself and finish my other multi-chapter so I could focus more on my other work :)_

_So because of the delay I changed this chapter a bit therefore the summary of the 'Next Chapter' on chapter 6 is not correct. _

_I hope you enjoy this chapter! _

_**Disclaimer:** Same as chapter 1 - 6. _

* * *

'Where on Earth is that girl?' Mary whispered with some worry. When she woke up Anna was already gone, her blankets folded neatly in one corner of the house, and her bags of dresses nowhere in sight.

'What's the matter?' John asked sleepily, waking up at the sound of his sister's grumbling, and wincing in pain when he try to shift his body on the hard mattress.

'She's gone!' Mary said in a baffled tone. 'And her bags too...' She shook her head in annoyance. 'She must have had a terrible night...I saw the look of horror on her face last evening when I told her the washroom was that pot beside the stove, and she didn't know what that bucket in my room was for.' She rolled her eyes at him.

'Christ,' he said in pain. 'Must you be so hard on her?'

'What? I thought you didn't want her here!'

'Mary...I…I don't feel well, please, don't make me argue with you. Not today.'

'I'm sorry,' Mary said walking towards him. 'How are you doing?'

'Less dead. Still in pain though.'

'Of course, it was only two nights ago...' The woman caressed her brother's hair. 'Now, don't worry about her. She must have run home to all the comfort she's use to. Maybe she's getting married as we speak.'

His gaze turned towards the ceiling, taking in his sister's words, and he feared she was right.

All he thought he wanted was for her to stay away, for her own good, but he was only fooling himself, because all he ever wanted was her. Before, they had everything to lose, especially Anna, and now everything was lost and there was nothing they could do. The rumours would start to spread like wildfire in summertime, through the dry leaves of society and soon everyone would know. Everyone would look at her and judge. They would say hurtful things about her and her honour, about him, about the both of them, but now, nothing could be done.

John sighed. He hated that people would think so badly of her. She was worth every bit of kindness and good, not judgmental stares and filthy words.

'You know…' Mary began, sensing the frantic chain of thoughts inside her brother's mind. 'You should give her more credit, and when she comes back, you should try to be happy once and for all. No matter what people say, there's nothing you can do to change their minds. So you might as well live the way you want, with her.'

He looked at his sister with a puzzled expression as she motioned her head towards the pile of blankets.

'Have you gone mad, girl? One minute you curse her, the next you tell me I should give her more credit?'

'She left her nightgown and a shawl. I didn't see that before. Also...' she continued, grabbing the hard cover book, 'her book. I suppose I was wrong.'

He smiled, staring back at the ceiling. 'You make her sound so weak sometimes...she's far from that.' After last night, he would perish truly if she left him.

'Oh well, as long as she helps us. She needs to find something to do, as I do. And I'm sure you will too, when you recover.'

John twisted his nose.

'What? Do you think Mr Smith will have you in the factory after everything? Not a chance.'

'I...I don't know. What will she do? All she can do is read and drink tea,' he said, not really trying to diminish Anna's worth but more at the thought of seeing her working hard for a living. He should be able to support her. After all, if it wasn't for him she would still be living in luxury, getting married...John took a deep breath trying to disperse his thoughts. The last he needed now was to think of her with another man.

'Maybe we can do some washing and mending for the middle class. You can deliver. William can start selling papers or polish some shoes.'

John took a long painful breath again, but this time for his son. It hurt him to see William working so young. He remember how it had been with him, and he hated it. At least for now, the children were well at Mrs Oliver's. She was a good woman but she wouldn't be able to keep them for much longer, maybe a few more days but no more than that.

XXXXXX

'There you are!' Mary said,folding her arms around her middle as she leaned against the doorframe. The sun was shining overhead, women were chattering as they moved along the narrow street, surrounded by children and starving dogs. 'I thought you wouldn't show up among the rabble ever again.'

'You forget I belong to the rabble now, no matter what I might look like,' Anna smiled walking past Mary, with mischief sparkling in her eyes.

'Where have you been? Where's your bags?' Mary followed her inside.

'Good morning, Mr Bates,' Anna announced smiling at him. John looked up from where he was lying and couldn't help but smile widely at her.

'Will you tell me what you were up to? You shouldn't go out like that, you don't know this neighborhood,' Mary pleaded.

'I'm fine,' Anna said rolling her eyes.

'Because you were lucky! What did you do with your bags?'

'Are you suddenly the authority? Or worse! Mrs Smith?' They eyed each other in a contest of wills, while John tried his best to stop his grin from showing, before Anna continued. 'I sold them.'

'You what?'

'I sold them. Traded them for money. It's here.' She placed a small bag on the table. 'I don't know where to buy things so...maybe, you could go, or we could go together.'

Mary looked over at John who was now frowning in confusion.

'You sold your dresses? To whom?!' John exclaimed.

'I went to some stores I know. They didn't offer me half what they were worth, but they were used and...I think, everyone knows about my… situation already.' Anna took a deep breath. 'I didn't have much choice.'

'How did you manage to carry all those bags?' Mary was astonished.

'I asked a couple of boys to help me. William helped me too,' she said looking at John. 'He asked after you.'

'And this is what you got?' Mary said touching the bag lightly.

'I have more, but we'll save that for another time. We can't spend everything now.'

'Where is it?'

'Safe. Now, you should buy milk and bread, and everything that's need to make a strong broth. I don't know what that is because...I...I don't know how to cook,' Anna said, averting her eyes and biting her lower lip.

Mary looked over at John one last time. Her mouth was half opened and she couldn't say another word.

XXXXXX

'Come on...eat everything,' Anna told John as she tried not to spill any broth on him. 'Mr Bates!'

'I'm not hungry,' he said stubbornly, turning his face away from the spoon.

'You barely ate.'

'I ate enough. I wasn't even hungry before.'

She rolled her eyes impatiently. 'Alright, then. I won't force you anymore.'

'I feel like a child. You feeding me while I'm laying here, unable to move.'

'You are recovering, Mr Bates. And if you eat well and rest you'll be out of this bed in the blink of an eye.

He shook his head slowly. 'You shouldn't have done it.'

'You would spill everything by yourself.'

'No. I mean the dresses. You shouldn't have sold them. They were yours, you liked them.'

'And because they were mine I sold them. And I only liked them a little. I like you more.'

He looked at her, surprised, still not used to such words, and smiled when he met her kind eyes.

'And then I'm not going to any ball or on a grand visit. I kept two so I can change, I didn't need the rest,' she sighed. 'I understand how spoiled I've been. I had too much of everything.'

'You never knew any different.' He tried to shift his body in vain.

'Are you defending the aristocracy, Mr Bates?' Anna arched her brow.

'Only you...You say that you are where you want to be but...' slowly he reached toward her, and gently raised her chin with his index finger. 'I see a shadow in your eyes...a shadow that wasn't there before.'

She shook her head, feeling suddenly defeated, trying to smile, but it turned into a pout instead. 'Something my...' she sighed, angry with herself. 'It's something my mother said.'

'You knew she wouldn't let you leave without angry words spoken.'

'No...not like that. She said horrible things to me but...this was an outburst more like.'

'What did she say?' He sat up as best as he could with her help. 'Tell me.'

Anna looked over her shoulder and saw Mary gathering some clothes to wash. 'She said she should've never taken me in.'

Mary stopped what she was doing to look at her brother's expression. He didn't say a word but his eyes were troubled and the silence prevailed in the house for long seconds.

'Forget what she said. It will only make it worse if you think about it,' John said softly.

'How can I not think about it. What she said hides a meaning that makes me cringe every time I try to grasp it. Sometimes I don't want to think about it but other times that's all I can do. It's haunting me like my own shadow.' Her voice broke almost in a sob and Anna had to close her eyes for a moment to keep her tears from falling.

'Mark my words you lovebirds, your troubles are just beginning,' Mary commented, making John roll his eyes in annoyance, but she continued, 'You missed your own wedding, disobeyed your own mother and now you are here, living a life that you didn't know existed. Do you think Mr Smith had the time to call off the reception?'

'It doesn't matter, Mrs Bates, whether he had the time or not, the bride wasn't present so it didn't happen anyway.'

That was enough to silence Mary and John had to suppress a laugh at his sister's baffled face.

'Where can I get some water to wash with?' Anna asked, placing the bowl at the table.

'The fountain,' John replied.

'Isn't it dry?'

'It has water from three O'clock until five,' said Mary.

'Why?'

'Because that's when Mr Manson pedals the bobbin. He works in the factory the rest of the time. Here, take these two buckets and you can bring water for the night as well.'

Anna looked at the buckets before her, unsure, and took them from Mary's hands. They were already heavy without any water in them and she feared she wouldn't be able to even drag them back to the house after they were filled. She said nothing though, and went to the fountain without saying a word.

'Honestly Mary!' John scolded, 'sometimes it seems that you'll give her a break, then you run after her as if you were a cat and she were a mouse.'

Mary pursed her lips. 'I don't want her to think it will be easy. Because it won't,' she said harshly.

'She knows that. Pointing it out to her all the time and being rude will only make her dislike you.'

'I don't want her to think she's safe here. That everyone's friendly and kind, like you are. There's rotten people out there waiting for a bit of fresh flesh to play with. She doesn't know the place, the corners and alleys out there. I've lived here all my life and God knows I have to be careful.'

John laid down again bringing his blanket up close to his neck.

'She never stepped out of her castle without her maid. Just that one time she brought the basket,' Mary continued as she threw more wood in the fire. 'You know it was Elsie who told her to come to your aid?'

'Elsie Hughes?' John furrowed his brow trying to make some sense of it.

'I wonder what her mother said? What do you think?' Mary pondered.

'I think it's something we shouldn't comment on,' he shot her an angry look.

'Please?' Anna's voice interrupted them. 'I can't carry the buckets alone,' she said quietly and ashamed.

'Oh Lord,' the dark haired woman looked up, sighing. 'Let's go, I'll help you. Did they teach you anything at all in...'

His sister's voice continued with the nagging as he heard the people outside. Since Mary had known how to talk, she would always be complaining and telling people what to do, always thinking she knew more than everyone else. Their father would punish her hard for the wild tongue she had, but in the end she would never learn her lesson. John only hoped that she wouldn't make Anna's life more difficult than it already was.

XXXXXX

The water came to a boil and Anna asked Mary if she could use her room. Alone in the dark and cold, she lit a candle to keep her company as she slowly undressed and unpinned her hair.

First, she washed her hair. She knelt down on the floor with her head over the bucket, trying her best not the spill any water, and she cried. She cried because she couldn't waste any precious water or she wouldn't have any left to wash her body. She cried because they didn't have something as simple as a tub, but mainly, she cried because this was the placed where she belonged now, because her mother didn't love her. Because the man she loved was hurting terribly. And all of this was her fault.

She didn't regret coming to live by his side, not one bit, but she let herself cry one last time for everything she had left behind. And although she would certainly miss the luxury, as she was missing now, she would never trade all that for him. If being with John Bates meant using a bucket as a tub for the rest of her life, she would, glady.

When it was time to wash her body the water was almost cold and she cleaned herself in hurry, trying to make the water last as much as possible. She could hear them talking in the other room, but their voices were muffled and she hoped Mary wasn't being hard on her again. The last thing she wanted was to turn sister against brother.

She dried off then, and dressed the nightgown and robe she had kept from the bags of dresses, and took a little bottle of lavender scent in her hands and used only a few drops to rub on her hair, neck and wrists. She put her hair in a long braid and tied with a silk red ribbon, the same she had used the night she found him in the alley, the only silk ribbon she would probably have for the rest of her life.

'You do smell fancy, Miss,' Mary remarked twisting her nose when Anna approached her asking if she could help with dinner.

She brightened the small room just by being in it. Her golden hair and pure white clothes making her shine against the dark old walls together with her intoxicating smell, and John found it hard not to stare at her and at the way she moved and talked. She had a proud elegance in her manner that came to her as easy as breathing and he wondered how someone so young held such a high presence in a room. But the difference between her and anyone else was that she was filled kindness and humility, and that was what made her so special. So her.

'I bought bottle of lavender scent this morning when I went to town...and I bought one for you too,' she replied, smiling kindly at Mary.

'For me?'

'Yes. It's a small bottle, just like mine, but I saw it in the storefront and I thought you would like it...to thank you for having me here.' Anna fiddled with her fingers, taking a deep breath, 'And...and you don't have a tub so a bath is something that won't happen every day, is it? You might as well smell the best you can and make it last.'

Mary had to laugh at her words and told her to help peeling potatoes.

'Did you hear that, John? A bath a day! That's why posh people smell from miles away with all the scents and fancy perfumes.'

John grinned softly.

'You don't like it?' Anna asked.

'Oh, yes, I do, Miss. And I thank you,' Mary smiled. 'I don't think I ever had a bottle of scent!'

'Well then, this will be your first!'

The two women prepared dinner, with Mary having to teach Anna how to peel and boil potatoes. With the food Mary had bought earlier they would have enough for at least two weeks and they could actually cook. They made a stew, with vegetables and even a piece of chicken and Anna found the whole idea rather amusing, marveling at how simple it was to boil a few potatoes and turnips.

'I am rather hungry, actually,' John said when the smell of the stew began to fill the small house.

'That is wonderful, Mr Bates!'

XXXXXX

'How's my son,' he asked quietly when the night came.

'He misses you and asked what was going on. He finds it strange that I'm here.'

Anna filled a bowl with a bit of water and sat down on the floor next to his mattress.

'Of course, poor lad,' he sighed sadly. 'What did you say?'

'I said you were not feeling very well.' She soaked a clothed in the warm water before bringing it to his face to clean his dry blood. ' And that you would be able to see him soon.'

'And what about you being here?' he winced a little.

'I didn't tell him. I think you should do it.'

John nodded in agreement.

Anna had an easy smile on her face while performing her task, and he could tell she was enjoying taking care of him. He couldn't help but stare at her, that had become his favourite thing to do. Her eyes were the deepest blue and her skin impossibly flawless. She smelled of that lavender scent, but also of her own gentle spirit, and for a moment he dared to imagine how sweet her lips would taste under his own. How lovingly her tongue would dance with his and how warm the skin beneath her clothes would feel against his body. He took a deep, shaky breath and looked down at his hands. Strong, rough hands from a life of work. Hands that would contrast with the softness of her perfect skin, and the thought of it made him shiver. How could someone look so angelic but so tempting at the same time? How could such characteristics live together in the same person?

'What is the matter, Mr Bates?' she asked when she noticed the sweat on his brow. 'Are you alright? Do you feel hot?' She touched him with the back of her hand and he pulled away from her, startled.

'No. I am fine,' he said nervously. 'I think we should sleep. I am sure you are terribly tired.'

'The doctor said your wounds had to be cleaned every day.'

'Mary can do that.'

'You don't want me to?'

He looked at her and saw the disappointment in her eyes, and immediately he cursed himself.

'It's not that...'

'What is is then Mr Bates?' she sighed, placing the bowl and the cloth on the floor beside her. 'I wish you would allow yourself to live, to love.'

He looked at her again. 'I am afraid of how much I will disappoint you. Not just me but this life. It's fine now, you've been living here for two days, but what about in two years? Ten years?'

'And do you think I would go back? Do you really believe that after everything, I would just leave and forget you? Don't you understand that I ran away that one night to be with you, and when I did I knew it was a final decision.'

'I shouldn't doubt you so much, should I?'

'No, you shouldn't. But don't worry, with time, you won't,' she gave him a playful smile. 'May I continue?'

'I'd like for you to read for me,' he whispered.

'I will, but after I am done cleaning your wounds,' she promised.

Oh God, she would kill him before he even had the time to properly tell her how much he wanted her. The softness of her hands felt like exquisite silk and he couldn't help but look deep into her eyes as she cleaned the red scar just under his eyebrow.

'You are so beautiful in the candlelight,' he said in a low, gravelly voice, bringing his hand up to caress her cheek. 'You look like an angel descended from heaven.'

Anna looked deep into his eyes. 'I don't want to look like an angel, Mr Bates.'

He looked at her questioningly.

'I want to be a woman. I want you to want me, as much as I want you,' she finished.

John smiled, bringing his other hand to cup her face. 'But don't you know that I do, Anna?' His question lingered in the silence without the need of a spoken answer and slowly he pulled her to him until their lips met in the sweetest of kisses. A chaste kiss, as they let their lips to get used to the feeling of each other's. Seconds later they broke apart, both with dreamy smiles, both wanting this moment to last for all eternity.

'I love you, Mr Bates,' she whispered to him, and he couldn't help himself. He kissed her again.

This time he let himself surrender to his own desire to discover more of her, and gently he teased her lips with his tongue, begging permission for a taste of her, as if she were the only one who could save him from this undying thirst. And she opened to him, slowly at first, unsure of what to do and how to react, but Anna Smith had always been a fast learner and as easy as breathing, their tongues found their own matching rhythm.

His hands were now more possessive on her, as one travelled down to her middle and the other to the back of her neck, pulling her more into him, and feeling the silk of her hair against his skin. Her own hands were spread upon his chest, absorbing the warmth and the erratic beating of his heart and she had never felt so happy in all her life.

'Anna...' he breathed heavily when they broke apart in need of air, and held her pressed to his chest for several long seconds.

Finally she looked up at him with such love. He took a strand of hair away from her eyes, kissing her cheek as he did so, 'Will you read to me now?'

She smiled. After such kiss, her cheeks were hot and she brought her hands to her face trying to mask her shyness away. 'Of course, Mr Bates.'

'I think you can call me John now,' he teased, his own flesh boiling as he tried to control the will of his body, shifting on the old hard mattress and bringing the blankets up to his middle.

He was left without an answer as she rose to fetch the book from the table. When she came back, he motioned her to sit on his own bed next to him.

'Sit with me. I don't want you away any longer. I want you as close as possible.'

'Is it proper, Mr Bates?' she teased him, sitting down as he had asked.

'I am a man in need of healing, no harm can be done.'

XXXXXX

'Elsie?'

The knock on the door had been hard and dry, a single one, but enough to wake her from her sleep.

That familiar voice frightened her now. It had been many years and the sound of him at her door was all but forgotten. But now it seemed their entire story had happened only yesterday.

'May I can in?'

'Yes, sir! Of course.' She wrapped her robe tightly around herself.

'I need to ask a favour of you.' He ventured further into the small room. 'I want you to visit Anna tomorrow and give her this letter.' He handed her an envelope.

'That is no favour, sir. I was planning on visiting her soon.'

'I am sure you were.' Mr Smith looked down at his feet. 'I'm sorry for all of this. I know how much you...'

'You don't, sir. You have no idea. I will go to see her tomorrow and I'll give her your letter, but if you are begging her to come home...I will tell you, you wasted your ink.'

'How can you be so sure?'

'Because I know her...more than you do.'

The man nodded pensively, trying to think of something else to say but words failed him. The maid was right and there was nothing he could do. He had raised Anna with all the comfort and discipline possible, and he felt he had done the best he could. He cared for her and loved her as a father should...any other man would never had been so merciful

He bid Elsie goodnight and left the room, leaving her with the letter burning in her hands.

She wouldn't read it, the maid believed that reading one's private messages was one of the wickedest thing someone could do. Tomorrow she would see Anna and herself would beg her to come back home, but she knew her darling girl would never come. Anna was where she belonged. She had seen it in her destiny and never had she seen lines as clear as the ones on Anna's palm. So she kneeled by the bed and prayed to God to protect her child from all evil and trouble, and hoped she would find the girl with certainty written in her eyes, just like on the night she left, just like every time she would speak of John Bates.

Now, that was someone she had to talk with. John Bates.

* * *

_**Next Chapter: **The children return home and Mary and Anna try to find some work to do. Later that day Elsie visits and ends up telling John the whole truth about her past._

_Thank you for reading :)_


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N:** New Update, more secrets revealed! Hope you enjoy this chapter! Thank you all so much for the feedback. It's always wonderful to read your reviews and see your faves and follows :D

_**Disclaimer:** Same as chapter 1-7._

* * *

There was no sleep to be found for Anna this night.

Lying on her uncomfortable bed, if you could call it that, her mind kept drifting back to their breathtaking way he draped one strong arm around her shoulders while she read to him. John Bates was like a soft rock, if that was a possible description; a steady man with a broad chest and large hands, but with the delicacy of a passionate lover. It was a mystery to her how he managed to be so sweet and touch her so gently, and murmur such beautiful words in the thick silence of the night It was as if he had spent all his life preparing himself for these moments with her. And maybe that was the case. That this tall and strong man, feared by some and respected by so many, had spent all his life waiting for her.

She smiled. His kiss had left her wonderfully dizzy and she was still blushing at the memory of their earlier exchanges. He had tasted of lemon, maybe due to the tea, it was a taste she'd always longed for but never knew until that moment.

He had been gentle at first and she could have cried at his tenderness, but when he kissed her again there was an urgency to it. She felt like she was more than alive, as if she were living a thousand lives and experiences all at once and she understood, at last, the poems and texts of lovers and lonely souls she had alway held so dear.

She had read to him. Her head leaning against his chest as his breath whispered through her hair, and she didn't want that moment to end. When his hand had caressed the skin of her neck, all the hairs on her body stood at once, and the quickening in her lower belly increased with every touch. A feel of undying need for something she didn't quite grasp. She would try to focus on the words before her and think of nothing else.

What Anna didn't know, while she relived all these memories, was that John was doing just the same. His mind was unable to shut down for the night, unable to think of anything else. He did try though. He missed his son and his nephew and nieces and he needed to find something to do soon, but the smell of her hair and her skin and the sweetness of her tongue were driving him to the edge of madness.

John wouldn't be so upset with himself if he was twenty years younger and didn't have so many people depending on him already. After all, what he was feeling was worthy a young man's mind not an old father like him...but maybe...he was wrong. He never felt like this when he was young. He now accepted she was the one his heart had been waiting for.

XXXXXX

Everyone turned to stare as she walked through the narrow streets. A few greeted her. Others were unsure. Was it really her come back?

When was the last time she'd been here? Who were the last people she talked to? Did she still remember the alleys and dark corners of this place? So many years. Almost twenty two.

John heard the knock twice and cursed as he tried to rise from his mattress.

'Come in, it's opened,' he shouted trying to support himself against the wall. 'Come in...'

'Good morning...oh my. Let me help you!' Elsie Hughes ran to him. 'You don't have to...'

'I am fine,' he said, looking at her in astonishment as she helped him. A million things went through his mind. 'Miss Elsie...what…?'

'I've come to see Anna,' she replied, as John stood straighter, trying to get used to his legs again. 'But it looks like you're alone?'

'Yes. They've gone out. Mary wants to find them some washing to do.'

The pain in the maid's eyes was palpable as he spoke and she looked down at her feet. 'I see...'

'Please, sit down.' He motioned towards a chair. 'Tea?'

'I don't want to bother you.'

'Not at all, I'll make some while you wait for her.' John moved around the room with some difficulty, almost dragging his feet and holding his chest to reduce the pain.

'I see you are doing much better,' she tried to break the silence between them.

'How do you know how bad I was feeling before?'

She looked at him before averting her eyes again. 'Actually...I do need to speak to you as well.'

'I was just thinking the same, Miss Elsie.'

'You can just call me Elsie, John...we used to be friends and worked together.'

'That was a long time ago,' he smiled.

'Oh yes. A lifetime ago.'

'A lifetime as old as Anna,' he shot her a look.

'Yes...'

'What do you want to from me, then?' John asked.

'I want to tell you what you need to know.'

John sat down next to her. 'She's your daughter, isn't she?'

'Not anymore.'

'Elsie...' he shook his head. 'You have to tell her.'

'Do you think it's easy for me? After so many years? I gave her my breast while she called another one mother. Every night I would look down at her sleeping and whispered that I was her real mother, that I had brought her to this world, that I refused to give her away as they wanted me to. I don't regret it and she will know, but you have to promise me that you'll do everything to protect my girl, John Bates. You have to be by her side, she will need you more than ever.'

'She's a strong girl.'

'She is strong but all her life she thought her own mother was cruel. She doesn't know any different, and now, when she finds out that her real mother was always there, by her side, that she was given to another...it will hurt her more than anything.' Elsie wrung her hands.

'I know...and I will be here for her. But you must tell her soon, her mother's...Mrs Smith's words are torturing her and I know that's not what you want.'

'No...no,' Elsie whispered. ' I just need to find a way...'

'There is no way of telling something like this, you just do it. It's not a thing that gets better with time, quite the opposite,' John sighed.

'May I?' she pointed to his hand. 'Let me read your future.'

John pulled back. 'I'm sorry, Elsie, I don't believe...'

'She's here because I read her palm...let me do it, I just need answers.'

'Why would you find your answers in my hand?' he asked.

'You are more important than you think, John Bates. Now let me,' she said, reaching for his hand.

He turned his palm up and placed it in her hands while he stared attentively at the way her brow moved and her lips pursed.

'Then?' he asked some minutes after, half curious, half septical.

'I was right.'

'About what?' John questioned.

'Great things await you, John. Not yet, not easily...but you will get there...both of you.'

'Both? Anna and I?

She pursed her lips again before looking at him and nodding.

XXXXXX

Anna and Mary walked home,heavily burdened by two bags of dirty clothes each.

'Are we really washing all this?' Anna asked, stopping and resting a bag on the ground to dry some sweat off her brow.

'What do you think? We will leave it out in the night so the fairies will do it for us?' Mary rolled her eyes.

'I'm not sure I know how to wash clothing,' the younger woman twisted her nose.

'You soak, you soap, you hit as hard as you can. I'm afraid you will have to learn one way of the other. I won't be doing all this by myself, don't you think.'

'And I wouldn't want you to!' Anna raised her voice for a moment, lifting the bag again. 'I know that I have to help, don't you think I forgot about it.'

'Never know...people like you seem to forget all about responsibilities,' Mary muttered.

'What do you mean?'

'I mean we should hurry! I have to go to Mrs Oliver's house to see to the children. Then you will see how hard our life is, with three small children running back and forth, and fighting and biting and crying. Ah!' she laughed. 'You will beg to go back to your mighty castle.'

Anna huffed, annoyed while Mary walked on at a fast clip ahead of her, making it hard for her to follow. She knew it wouldn't be easy, she wasn't a fool.

'Bloody woman!' Anna allowed herself to whisper a curse, maybe for the first time in her life, while she tried to keep up with Mary's fast steps. 'Now I know why poor people curse so much.'

XXXXX

'Elsie!' Anna dropped the bags and ran to her former maid. 'I am so happy to see you!' She hugged the older woman tight. 'I knew you would visit.'

'But of course I would, Miss,' Elsie said, stepping back to softly pinch Anna's cheek. 'Look at you...' she sighed lovingly. Anna was shining. Her smile was wide and her eyes full of light. Her once fashioned hair was now simply braided and tucked at the back of her head and the humble dress she was wearing took no elegance away from her. 'You look radiant.'

'Maybe this is the life I always should have been living,' Anna replied smiling. 'Who knows?'

'With half of the street looking at her and the other half whispering indecencies,' Mary sputtered.

'Who whispered indecencies?' John asked frowning, as he still sat at the table.

'Men.' Mary rolled her eyes at him.

'They've never seen such a beautiful sight in their life, what can you expect?' Elsie continued, rather annoyed with Mary's words. 'But look at you Mary! You weren't more than a child last time I saw you.'

'They weren't indecencies, Mr Bates, we could barely hear what they were saying.' Anna tried to lighten up the mood. 'But tell me Elsie, how's everything?' They both sat down and Anna prepared herself to listen to the worst.

'The Mistress is a nervous wreck. She's been turning down visits. And Mr Smith...oh well, you know your father, Miss. Silent. He wrote an announcement calling off the wedding due to personal difficulties but everyone knows the truth and Mr Charles...Mr Smith said he caught the first boat to India Monday morning.'

'Well at least you don't have to fear unexpected visitors. Odd though, Mr Charles lost his bride and didn't bother to come look after her.' Mary spat.

'He knew I loved Mr Bates. He must have known I would not marry him when I loved another. Why bother to look after someone who doesn't want you?' Anna replied eyeing Mary in defiance.

'But what matters is that you are well, my child. I was hoping to find you with a smile on your face and I'm not going home disappointed,' Elsie smiled. 'If you are so sure you want to stay.'

'Of course, Elsie! I would not go back for the world.'

John allowed himself a small triumphant smile as he looked over at Mary.

'Oh! Mr Smith send you this letter,' the maid handed her the envelope.

'I'll read it later...thank you Elsie.'

'Well, you all drink some tea while I go fetch the children,' Mary finally said, leaving the room while Anna, John and Elsie drank tea together.

At first, the maid was reluctant to sit at the same table as Anna. So many years of servitude. She almost refused the old, heavy mug Anna placed in front of her. 'I should be the one doing that, Miss.' she said, embarrassed, but the young woman let her know that she was no lady now. That they were equal in status. Even though Elsie always wanted to hear that from her own child, the heaviness of the situation made her long for those days when Anna was surrounded by comfort and luxury. She always wanted to call her daughter but looking around and remembering her young years...even if Mrs Smith was not the best of people, the misery and poverty that were ahead of Anna was something too hard too bear.

'Are you quite alright, Elsie?' Anna asked, worried by the expression on her former maid's face.

'Quite alright, Miss...just my own mind wandering about.' Elsie looked over at John and he nodded.

XXXXXX

'Pa!' William's voice erupted through the door, followed by his cousins and Mary, who carried her youngest girl in her hip.

'Oh God!' John winced once his son jumped on his lap and wrapped his small arms around his neck. 'Careful there, lad.'

'William!' Mary scolded.

'Let him be, Mary. There's no wrong in missing his father.' He looked down at his son ruffling his hair and placing a kiss on his forehead. 'I've missed you, lad.'

The boy settled on John's lap. 'We played games and ate lots of potatoes!'

'And Mrs Oliver gave him a smack because he spit on her cat,' Elsa said hiding behind her mother's skirt, unsure about the other two women in the room.

John gave a pointed look to his son who shrugged in mild embarrassment. 'That was only one time,' the boy defended himself.

'Who's them?' the other boy asked.

'Who are they, George,' Mary corrected.

'Miss Elsie, a friend,' John began, nodding in Elsie's direction. 'And...this is Anna. She'll be living here with us.'

''Why?' William whispered.

'Because...' John tried to think of an answer his young son would understand.

'Because I have nowhere to go and you all seem so nice, so I thought this would be a good place for me too.' Anna tried to convince the children, kneeling on the floor. 'May I stay with you?'

Elsa nodded enthusiastically, moving away from her mother's safety to approach Anna. 'You're pretty,' the girl smiled. 'Is your hair made of gold?'

'Elsa, don't be silly. Her hair's just yellow, just like all yellow-haired people,' Mary snapped.

'But mummy...it's so shiny!'

'It's gold I tell ya,' William nodded, sure of himself.

'Alright, you children need a bath! Look at those filthy face of yours! Everyone to the bedroom, you all need a good scrub.' Mary rushed the children to the room but not before telling Anna they would need more water for dinner after the bath.

Anna looked from Elsie to John and smiled, shrugging her shoulders before taking another sip of her tea. Yes, life wasn't easy but she would never go back.

XXXXXX

'What did it say?' John sat down next to her on his mattress.

'I'm sorry I'm taking your bed. I didn't want to read it there,' she motioned towards the table where the children were eating their dinner.

'Nonsense. You can always take my bed, whenever you want,' he winked playfully and Anna blushed. 'No, I'm sorry. What I meant was...you can alway sit here,' he laughed nervously. 'I didn't mean to offend you.'

'Far from that, Mr Bates. You cheered me up with your forwardness.'

He smiled. 'You needed cheering up after that letter then?'

'Father says if I go back he'll forget everything,' she sighed. 'He says I can marry who I want and...he'll give you your job back.'

'That's an alluring proposal,' John frowned.

'Can't he understand they are the same person?' Anna said with a sigh.

'Who?'

'You and the man I want to marry? Only you.'

He smiled gently and dared to rest his hand on her back, soothing her.

'It's alluring only because of your job,' Anna sighed.

'No!' John begged. 'Please, don't even consider going back just because of my job. I couldn't bear knowing you did that. As you use to say...I love you much more than that.' He shifted closer to her.

Anna looked at him in surprise while her lips spread into a broad and teary smile.

'What's the matter?' he asked, worried.

'You said...'

'I do. I love you.'

'You are wicked, Mr Bates.' She dried her eyes with the back of her hands.

'Why?' he grinned curiously.

'Saying that all of a sudden and while they are there.' She took a deep breath. 'I'm not used to it.'

'Well...you better get used to it then,'John said with a soft smile.

Anna smiled sadly. 'I would just love for this feeling of doubt to go away...it's spoiling everything,' she whispered desperately.

'Your mother's words again?'

'Again and always...' She looked up at him. 'Why do you seem so...like you know something when I speak about it? I see it in your eyes...Do you know more than you say?'

He avoided her gaze and brought his hand to hers. 'I promise you...soon you will know what her words meant.'

'You didn't answer my question.'

'That's because I don't want to lie to you, Anna. Soon,' he squeezed her hands. 'Trust me.'

'Pa, can you tell us a story?'

'Of course I can,' John said, patting Anna's hand and looking at her gently. 'And you'll let me know if my stories are as good as those books of yours,' he teased her.

'Oh, I am sure you are much better poet and a storyteller than Shakespeare or Lord Byron!' Anna laughed, leaving her worries behind her for now.

She would try to forget what troubled her for a moment and enjoy this loving ambiance around her. This was the stuff of her dreams. Happy children around a mother or a father with the gift of storytelling. Laughs and games and light moods. Something so foreign to her and that meant so much. John and his sister Mary couldn't afford a big house or new clothes but they could put a smile on their children's faces. The old saying was right after all. Money can't buy happiness and Anna Smith was the living example of that.

* * *

_**Next Chapter:**_ _John and William try to find something to do while Anna struggles with the washing. Meanwhile, Elsie can't bear her own lies and decides to tell Anna the whole truth about their past, but her uneasiness is easily detected by Mrs Smith..._

_Thank you for reading :)_


	9. Chapter 9

_**A/N: **New update, more heartbreak. Is that a rule? Maybe in Handy's Land xD Hope you enjoy this chapter! Next one it won't take as long to post :)_

_**Disclaimer:** Same as chapter 1-8. _

* * *

By the third day of intense washing, the rough uneven stones from the fountain had completely chewed away the skin from Anna's hands and knuckles. Now, almost one month later, her fingers were still as red as blood, but there was nothing else she could do.

Mary remembered when it was hard for her to wash clothes. She must have been six or seven when her own skin peeled under those same stones, but like everything else in life, she had no other option. Her hands had eventually callused over and so would Anna's.

Day by day John got better, and at night he took care of Anna's wounds, with the same devotion she had taken caring for his. He felt her pain as if it were his own but every time he told her to ease up on her task a bit he was met with silent determination and a smile. If others could do it, she could do it too.

_'I've been resting all my life,'_ she would tell him sometimes, when he tried to kiss the redness away. _'This is my life now. This is where I belong.'_

_More than you can imagine. _His thoughts haunted him. Every night she would turn quiet and pensive. Her eyes distant and her lips pursed. The children's laughter had no effect on her and he knew what she was thinking. Her mother's words were always with her.

_'You ungrateful bastard! After everything I've done for you?! You were nothing, I should have never taken you in. And now you shall live as you were born. As a rat in the middle of the filth!'_

As a strong heartbeat in her ears, those words shouted louder still when she tried to sleep. She would shut her eyes as hard as she could and wish them gone, but they would grow so unbearably loud and poisoned, that all she could hear in the end was her inner fears. Demons trying to seduce her to the edge of sanity.

God! He wish he could tell her. And he almost did every time he saw her like that, but he knew that was not his secret to tell. He would wait for Elsie Hughes, he was sure she would come back soon.

XXXXXX

John Bates rose from bed earlier than usual that morning, one month after his attack. He woke young William before the sun was up and went to London city to find some work for the both of them. And he found exactly what he was looking for in a damp and dark store.

'How much for the polish box?' he asked.

'The whole set?' a short man with dirty glasses asked from behind the counter.

John nodded.

'Ten shillin'.'

'Ten?!'

'It's a whole set!' the man insisted, pointing out the obvious.

John reached in his pocket and counted the dark old coins, while William sat at one corner of the store, head fallen and playing with the remaining buttons of his jacket.

'Tell you this...I'll make it eight and the lad can clean the front glass,' the proprietor offered.

John looked over his toward child and grimaced. 'Alright.' His poor darling son. 'It's a deal.'

The polishing box set was exchanged and the boy was handed a bucket of water and a dirty cloth.

'I want them shining!' the man shouted as they walked out and closed the door.

'Listen son, you clean that glass as best as you can.' John kneeled and placed his hands on the boy's shoulders. 'I'll come to fetch you in an hour or so. Alright?'

William nodded, looking up at the tall window, furrowing his brow at the massive size of it.

'Good boy.' John pinched his cheek softly before rising and taking the box in his hands. 'Don't leave without me,' he warned.

Nearly three hours later John came in sight at the bottom of the street, and the boy, who was now sitting on the pavement, crestfallen with both of his hands supporting his chin, jumped and ran towards him.

'Pa!' William grabbed his father's leg tightly and sighed in relief. 'You took so long!'

'I'm sorry, son, but it was worth it.' He mussed the boy's hair affectionately. 'I've got you a job.'

XXXXXX

'Newspaper boy?' Mary frowned.

'Yes. They pay him a shilling a week. It's better than nothing. From ten to four.'

'I'm sure if I asked my father -' Anna began.

'I'm sorry but,' John interrupted Anna, looking down at his feet. '...I don't want any favours from your father.'

'Yes, of course. I'm sorry.' She fiddled with her fingers, sitting at the table.

'Maybe Elsa can start helping us with the washing,' Mary suggested, rocking her youngest child to sleep. 'She can help hanging up.'

John looked over to the elder children, who were playing a game with some stones on the floor. 'Elsa's too young. She can barely talk.'

'And I still have some money,' Anna added hopefully.

'Speaking of which I don't understand why you are saving it. We are working for money and you have some hiding somewhere.' Mary rolled her eyes.

'It's her money, Mary! Stop bothering her at once.' John tried his best not to raise his voice, but Mary's harsh words towards Anna were unacceptable.

'I am saving it for times of necessity,' the younger woman explained.

'Times of...these are times of necessity!' his sister insisted.

'We have the washing, and now Mr Bates and William have something to do as well. What if there comes a day when there's nothing left and we will need it?' Anna tried again but she could see that her words were being wasted even before they reached Mary's ears.

'Are you listening to her?' Mary faced her brother.

'I am,' he said, slow and clear.

'And?' she widened her eyes.

'And she has more brains than you ever will, that's a fact.' He sat down across from Anna with a sweet smile on his face.

'Oh! Whatever you say! Children! You go wash those filthy hands of yours. It's time for dinner.'

They all sat around the table, eating the usual watery soup, made of potatoes, carrots and some cabbages. With the money that was coming in from the washing, they also had a piece of bread each and a slice of cheese. Maybe with John's income they would be able to buy a piece of chicken now and then. Now that would be lovely.

Yes, life was hard but Anna would never complain. Everything had a special taste about it. As if less was now more. The little they had was received with gladness and joy and that made the simplest of things better than any grand dinner. Anna had never appreciated a piece of stinky cheese as much as she did now. She was learning how to treat smiles and words as gold. She knew that every time she looked at John she fell more in love with him and that she had never been so glad to be alive.

Her only wish was for more time. Time to be alone with him. The children were back, the washing took hours, Mary's presence was constant and now John would go to work every day.

Since their first kiss, he had awoken in her a sort of selfish desire. She found herself wishing that the children would play at the neighbor's longer, that Mary stayed outside chatting with her friends, that the baby wouldn't cry so often. Their kisses were quick and unsure, always looking over their shoulders and very often their touches and smiles would be caught by Mary, who would roll her eyes at their romance.

'You're acting like a young, romantic fool, brother.'

And in a way he was. That's how Anna made him feel. Young, happy, utterly complete, and he was developing a knack for reading her mind.

So on that night, after dinner, while Mary was putting the children to sleep, John took Anna's hand, and without a word they made their way outside.

She followed him eagerly, with a sudden sweet warmth in her lower belly, smiling at him every time he looked back to ease her curiosity, but he never spoke. He pulled her by the hand, squeezing it gently as he walked into the dark alley that surrounded the building they lived in. There, the night was pitch black, shadowed by the old brick walls around them, and for a moment she missed the starlit nights from the big window of her old bedroom.

He stopped at the foot of some stairs and looked one more time at her before speaking. His voice was low and sultry. 'You first, Miss,' he winked and she did as he said. They started up a series of wooden steps that zig-zagged up the back of the building, maybe twenty steps at a crack. It was so dark she was afraid that her feet would find nothing before them and every time she hesitated his hand would come to her back and he would support her, persuading her to continue.

'Oh my,' she whispered in amazement, bringing her hands to her mouth and stepping out onto the rooftop. 'What is this place?'

'A forgotten place just for us.' John walked up behind her and rested his hand on her shoulder. 'I thought we needed some time alone now and then, and...in that house, well, it's impossible, don't you think?'

Anna nodded still taking it all in. Although they were only four floors up, the night sky reached down to kiss them and it seemed they were a world away from the slums below. Overhead she could see the stars twinkling through the wisps of chimney smoke and she decided then and there that this was their perfect place.

'Do you like it?' he asked, breaking the comfortable silence between them.

'So much more than that.' She turned in the circle of his arms to face him.

'How can I court you while Mary's twisting her nose at us?' he smiled into her hair, allowing her scent to invade all his senses.

'Mmmm, I've been thinking exactly the same.' Anna could hear his heart pounding against her ear. 'Thank you, thank you for this.'

'I've done it for my selfish self, don't you let me fool you,' he chuckled, looking into her eyes. 'And now I want a kiss.'

John didn't give her the time to answer to that. As soon as his words left his mouth, his lips were on hers and she couldn't help but sigh into him, feeling her whole body become oblivious to the world around her.

Their kiss was languid and sure. Their tongues caressed each other and his hands came to cup her cheeks. At last, they broke apart, both panting and lips red, flushed cheeks and passionate eyes, but in the darkness of a moonless night only their hot skin gave away their desire. That and the pulsing in their lower bodies. For Anna that was something completely new and somehow strange, something she felt only when he was this close to her...for John it wasn't new but he had never felt it so hard and demanding in all his life. Sometimes he would embarrass himself alone at his own thoughts towards her.

'Let's sit down on this old bench,' he said, sighing deeply, trying to regain the control himself.

'Yes, but why is there a bench up here?' Anna smiled as she sat down next to him.

'The rooftop was where my father used to fix all sorts of things...he was a handyman, the best. I used to come here when I was a boy to help him, after picking cotton at the factory.

'Would you bring all your...admirers too?' she bit her lower lip at her boldness.

'What? Surely not!' he looked at her in shock. Oh his sister and her big mouth. 'What did Mary tell you?'

'What I've always thought. That you were a very handsome young man and that you had all the girls at your feet,' she giggled, shyly.

'Ah! Not all the girls...Mary dramatizes everything.' He crossed his arms around his middle. 'But I wouldn't take you here if that was the case. You are special to me and this is our place alone.'

'I would just like to know more about you.' Anna looked down at her hands.

'What would you like to know?'

'Well...you are still very handsome, that I know,' he rolled his eyes. 'What? You are! And I know you have a son... had a wife...but that's all.'

John nodded and shrugged his shoulders. 'That's all.'

'I once asked you about your wife and you said she died in childbirth. But that's not what I wanted to know.'

'You see...Vera...it's difficult for me to speak about it. Maybe one day I will, not now, though.' He ran a hand through his mussed hair. 'Let's just look at the stars and enjoy each other's company. We have to go back soon.'

'Alright, but,' she pressed her hand against his bristly cheek, and felt him lean into it. 'I will ask you about it again, one day.'

'I promise you, the next time you ask, I'll tell you everything.' Anna nodded satisfied and he shifted closer to her until their legs touched. 'Now, lean your head on my shoulder, and know that this place is ours alone and that I love you.' He whispered into the cool air of that late summer night and Anna was more than glad to do so.

She may have slumbered for a couple of minutes, or maybe the sound of his breathing and the feel of his arm around her made time pass in a blink of an eye. His lips lingered on her hair every now and then, and his hand had caressed her poor raw knuckles. Anna was at peace and in love, and John had never felt so joyful in his entire life. For the first time he dared to dream, and all that he dreamed that night would come true...not just yet, but one day.

XXXXXX

After almost one month of sleepless nights and a painful heartbeat at the back of her throat, Elsie tried to avoid all thoughts of Anna, but every corner of the house had memories. She had lost a child twenty one years ago. She had lost the right to be called a mother and to call her her dear daughter, but thankfully she didn't miss all those precious years. She heard Anna's first word, she saw her first steps. She nursed her and then spoon fed her until she was old enough to eat by herself. She dressed, cleaned and put her to sleep, every day and night. She didn't miss a thing, she knew that, deep inside, she knew it but...that feeling of great loss would never leave her.

Elsie's hands were now trembling. Sweat gathered on her brow, and every time she looked at Mrs Smith she would secretly envy her. She always did, but now her resentment was profound.

'What's the matter, Elsie?' her mistress eyed her with a look of disdain.

'I'm afraid I don't feel too well, Madam.'

'Oh Goodness me. You better not infect me, Elsie. That would be most ungrateful, wouldn't it?' she flexed her brow with a nauseated look.

Since Anna left, Mrs Smith's words had been increasingly hurtful and teasing.

'_I've raised your daughter'_, the maid could hear her mistress saying behind her spiteful words. '_I've raised your daughter and this is what has come of it. I've raised that bastard and you should be thankful to me.'_ If only she had raised Anna with love and kindness. If only she had really raised her as her own, she would now have a caring daughter until her dying day. But Mrs Smith's bitter heart was not capable of such thing.

'Don't worry, Madam, it's just tiredness.'

'Ah! Does serving me tea tire you, Elsie? You are getting old…?' Mrs Smith mocked.

The maid remained silent.

'I know you visited her...' Mrs Smith broke the silence. 'You should have told me.'

'You said you didn't want to...'

'I should sack you for that!' Mrs Smith yelled as if Elsie was no more than a slave. 'I told you I didn't want you to visit her, didn't I?'

'But, Madam-'

'And I'll give you one more chance, Elsie.' She stood up and faced the maid. Her eyes red with rage, the vein in her neck matching the wildness of her expression. 'If you visit her once more, you won't work ever again. Do you understand?'

'Yes, Madam,' the maid looked at her feet, defeated.

'You'd better bury her deep down in the dirt. For your own good.'

Elsie's tears threatened to fall but she wouldn't be humiliated again. She swallowed them back.

'She's not yours anymore,' the mistress concluded before leaving the drawing room, pushing the maid aside.

Slowly, Elsie put the teacup on the tray, placed the little spoon on the saucer, covered the teapot and took a deep breath.

Her mistress had thrown her own words back at her. She had said the exact same thing to Anna. '_Bury John Bates at once.' _How wrong she had been. How can you bury a loved one? And certainly not your own child.

'She's not yours anymore,' Elsie whispered, taking the tray in her hands. 'She's always been mine, Madam, and she will always be.'

XXXXXX

If there was something in common between Anna and Elsie, that would be their stubbornness. There's always that one trait that a child brings from its parents, and Elsie smiled as she thought of how her daughter was so much like her in that matter. And in any matter of personality. Since she was a little girl, Elsie had seen in the child's eyes her own heart. Kindness, compassion and even wisdom. Her golden hair, deep blue eyes and fair complexion came from her father.

Simon had been ever so handsome when he was young, and that's why she fell under his spell. That and his immense repertoire of sweet words in her ear. His always shaved face and perfumed his suits. Dandy hats and matching ties, and a pearly flirty smile. That was Simon Smith.

Yes, she had loved him, many years ago. Sometimes she would forget how much. How happy and complete she felt that one night that led to all this. Maybe she should forget about all that because of the heartbreak that followed, but she still remembered his words, his promises, his low voice in her ear, so sure that everything would be alright. He lied. Or was he a victim as well? After all, he had helped her the best he could, she supposed, but could he have done more? Maybe…she sighed. The time for those unanswered questions was long gone, now there was nothing she could do.

Elsie was jarred out of her thoughts when suddenly a child ran into her, and she was in her body again, focused on her mission. Yes, she had said to her mistress that she wouldn't visit Anna ever again...but the point was, she was stubborn, just like her daughter.

So, she knocked on the door.

'Come in,' a sweet voice rang out from within, making Elsie smile. 'It's opened.'

Elsie poked her head in the door. 'Hello...'

'Elsie!' Anna ran to her, and for a moment the maid saw the child she once was, running after butterflies. 'I am so happy to see you!'

This time it was different. Elsie hugged her daughter as tight as she could, for what she was about to tell held the power to scar and hurt Anna deeply. Maybe it would mean their whole existence as mother and daughter, or even as former mistress and maid. So she hugged her, for as long as she could, and as much as Elsie wanted to cry on her shoulder she stopped herself from doing so.

'Do you want some tea?' Anna asked, a bit worried about her former maid's expression. 'I know how to brew tea now,' she smiled, victorious.

'Anna...'Elsie hesitated.

_That was it, _thought Anna_, something was very wrong. Anna? She had never called her Anna. _

'There's something I need to tell you.' Elsie looked so solemn.

'Alright,' Anna nodded, concerned.

'Are we alone?'

'Mary is at Mrs Oliver's and Mr Bates took William to sell papers.'

'Will he take too long?' Elsie hung her small handbag on the back of a chair.

'I don't think he will. No.'

'We will wait then. He needs to be here...for you.'

XXXXXX

When he came home, he wasn't too surprised with Elsie's presence. Mary had arrived in the meantime and the three women were now chatting easily. Anna sat with Sarah in her arms, babbling and smiling at the baby and making his heart clench in his chest. His elder niece and nephew were playing hide and seek in the street with the other children, laughing, sweaty hair and dirty feet, and for a moment he stood there in silence, taking in the calm before the storm.

'Good afternoon,' he came into the small room, a secret dread behind his smiling eyes.

'Mr Bates!' Anna announced, rising from her chair, happy to see him, bringing the baby to rest against her hip. 'We were waiting for you!'

'Were you?' he touched his sister's back before walking towards Anna and pinching the little one's cheek. 'You've got a nanny now, haven't you?' he kissed his baby niece's hair, lingering in his loved ones eyes. They would shed a sea of tears before dinnertime.

'Miss Hughes was waiting for you,' Mary said.

'Yes...take her, Mary.' He pointed towards the babe. 'This is between Anna and...Elsie'.

'But...'

'Please Mary. Do as I say.'

'It's alright, Mr Bates, I have no secrets.' Anna smiled, unsure.

John looked over at Elsie and sighed. 'You haven't but...someone else has. Please, Mary.'

Mary nodded, knowingly. 'Don't worry about William, I'll see to him before four o'clock.'

'Thank you.' After his sister left the three remained silent for a moment. Anna was anxious, almost desperate, but she didn't speak. She sat down instead, and for a second all she could hear was her own heart in her ears. John and Elsie's eyes held the same expression and she daren't to feel sorry for herself. It was time to be strong. She was used to it now...or so she thought.

'Tell me everything, Elsie,' she looked up and faced the maid. 'I am not my mother's daughter, am I?'

'No.' Elsie's voice came loud and clear. 'You are not,' and then tears, mixed with the smell of desperation, began to fall.

* * *

_**Next Chapter: **A Doctor is called to the Bates' house as tragedy strikes once again. _

_**Thanks for reading :)**_


	10. Chapter 10

_**A/N:** Hope you enjoy this chapter and have a great weekend! _

_**Disclaimer:** Same as chapter 1-9. _

* * *

One's life can change in less than a month. People are born and die and the world keeps turning as if nothing has happened. It's a neverending cycle of actions and results. In this very house a young woman finds out that her whole life has been a lie from the moment she drew her first breath. She belongs to this once foreign environment more than she could have imagined and just like that, a new page is written in the book of her life.

In this very house, old, small and damp, a mother cries and begs for forgiveness.

_Forgive me because I am your mother. Forgive me because I lied, because I gave you away. Forgive me because I once thought that abandoning you was the only way. If your father hadn't come to me with a solution...forgive me, my child. _

Elsie had always been strong woman but now she felt the like weakest of creatures. She told Anna the whole story. No concealments, no half truths. The whole, sad tale. She didn't really have to. It would have been enough if she had only said, _'I loved your father a long time ago and the result was you. I gave you to his wife so you could have a good life, a family, a home.'_ And she did say that, but also everything else.

She was twenty five when Simon Smith took over the factory after his father's death. He was thirty, devastatingly handsome and very rich. She had fallen for him, and with time and secret smiles she knew he felt the same. Or at least that's what he had told her. Until this day, she didn't know for sure if he had spoken the truth.

Many smiles and furtive kisses later, on a hot summer's eve, when work was done and the factory was closed, they met in one of the storage rooms and that's when the heartbreak began. In the space of one month he was married to Amelia Norton and Elsie found out she was pregnant.

Simon's eyes had shown the terror he felt as she told him the news, and he begged her to keep it a secret. '_Don't you know someone...who can help you with...that?' _

'_I won't do it_,' she told him with resolution in her voice. She shook her finger in his face and said that she would regret that one night forever but not her own child. '_A person with your own blood will pass right next to you and you won't even know it,'_ she had whispered at last. '_You are no better than a street rat.' _

He had begged her forgiveness, as much as she was begging now, and a few weeks later he came up with a solution. '_I'll name the child and my wife will raise it as her own.'_

But the solution had one condition. '_Only if you hire me as the nanny.'_

The deal was sealed. They travelled up north until the baby was born. Amelia Smith would make their life a living hell, but Elsie never regretted her decision. Not even now.

'_I will never regret what I did_,' was the last Anna heard from her. '_Lies are wrong but I don't regret any of them. Look at you_.' Elsie had smiled. '_So beautiful, so kind. I've raised you, saw you becoming the loving person you are today. All those lies brought you here. Forgive me but I will never regret what I did.' _

Anna had run out of the door, furious, desperate and feeling absolutely betrayed. Elsie had tried to stop her but John advised her not to do it.

'She needs time. Her own time. Something she's never had before.'

'Please. Take care of my girl, John Bates,' the maid pleaded before leaving.

John sat down at the table, sad expression, tired eyes, waiting for the right moment to go after Anna.

And there she was, exactly where he expected. Sitting on the bench in that secret place of theirs, that seemed a world away from troubles and heartbreak. Maybe that's what she sought out when she ran here. Maybe she wanted to be gone from all this, even from him, if only for a few moments. But the world was still out there and she was still part of it. A breeze was blowing through the loose strands of her golden hair. She was facing towards the city, tears stained her face and her blue eyes were red and swollen. Her throat was sore, and her breathing was heavy and ragged.

'Anna...' he spoke then, to let her know he was near. The day was darkening around them, shadows returning to match her troubled soul.

'You knew,' she stated, her voice raspy.

'Please...' He could hear the accusation in her voice.

'You knew and you didn't tell me. You knew and you saw me there, every night. I worried, I suffered, and you knew!'

'Listen, Anna,' he reached for her and she stood up, trying to run away from his arms but she had no strength to do so. Did she really want to? Maybe all she needed was his embrace, as much as she tried to deny it.

'It was not my secret to tell.' He grabbed her wrists first and then pulled her to him, wrapping his arms around her, placing his hands on her back as she cried into his shoulder. 'I couldn't tell you. You know that.'

She sobbed and he felt his shirt, wet on his skin from her tears. 'I know,' she managed to say. 'I know.'

'Look at me.' He lifted her chin with his fingers. 'You will be fine.'

'I spent my life thinking that my mother didn't love me...and I was right.' She gave him a small sad smile. 'She resents me. She wishes me dead. My brother died so young and he was her real child...she's always wished it was me instead.'

'Don't say that,' he begged her.

'But it's true!'

'Mrs Smith may wish all she wants but there's nothing she can do. You grew up, you survived, you are here now, and you are very loved, and she's there, all alone in an unhappy marriage, and an empty house. How could she resent a child, Anna? Only someone with no heart. She could have loved you, instead, she chose a life of bitterness and shadows. Do you really care about how she feels?'

She swallowed hard. 'She was the only mother I knew...I love her.'

'You still do?' he asked, astonished at her feelings.

She shrugged her shoulders unsure. 'Maybe...not anymore. After what she did to you...'

'And what about Elsie?'

She took a deep furious breath. 'She lied to me.'

'Elsie loves you, more than anything, and that's why she did what she did.'

'Why didn't she just raise me by herself? Why did she have to give me away like that? You don't give your child to another, do you? She saw how mother treated me and she did nothing!'

'Anna, you are being unfair.'

She looked at him angrily.

'She was a young woman, just like you are now. She had no husband, no man that people knew of. If she would have you here...she would have to end up as a...you know.'

Anna looked at her feet, taking one moment to think about his words.

'She fell in love with the wrong man and he took advantage of her innocence and feelings. She didn't want you to starve to death and that would probably happen. She had no family, no one. The only way to have you well and near her was to do what she did.'

Anna listened attentively, tears gathering in her eyes, still trying to understand what had happened.

'And she paid her price. How many times did she have to put up with her mistress' humiliation? How many times did she have to stop herself from protecting you from her? Or do you think it's easy to call your own child _Miss_? To hear your own daughter calling a cold hearted woman _mother_? Now you tell me, if you think back to those days...who was there to love you and to care of your wounds and fevers? Your mother, Anna. Your _real_ mother. The same woman who had to leave all she knew behind to live in a place she wasn't welcomed just for your sake.'

Anna began to sob again.

'She could have just given you away and left. Have her life back and forget about you, but she didn't do that. It was either you and her here or there.'

'What if she's just saying it now?' she asked. Her whole life had been a lie. Everyone around her lied to her. Why would Elsie tell the truth now?

'Because she wants to be here for you. She's always been.'

Anna dried her tears with the back of her hands. 'I never knew the feel of a mother's kiss on my cheek, or a word of affection. I've always been there,' she pointed at the darkest corner. 'In the shadow. I always felt like that and I didn't know why until today. I was no older than your William when I understood the hate in my mother's eyes. Sometimes it would swallow me alive and I couldn't bear to look at her. She would speak to me and all I would hear was the ridicule and judging. It's easy for you to talk, Mr Bates, but you never tasted the loathing in your mother's expression. And I am glad for that...it's an awful feeling. Worse than this.' She showed him her red scarred knuckles. 'This is nothing.'

He took her hands gently in his and brought them to his lips, barely touching the broken skin. 'And I shall take care of these as I beg you to let me heal your heart.'

Anna managed a small smile before falling into the warmth of his embrace once again.

'Do you promise me? Because I feel so much turmoil in my heart, so much anguish, and I hate feeling this way. I hate feeling this resentment, this restlessness eating me up like a plague,' she sighed into his chest. 'I need peace in my life. In our lives.'

'That's it, Anna. No more heartbreak, I promise you.' John kissed the top of her head, lingering in the silkiness of her locks and her perfume of lavender.

But how could he be so wrong? John Bates, a man of his word... This would be the first promise he wouldn't be able to keep.

XXXXXX

'Come here,' John whispered in the darkness, sitting up on his mattress. 'Sit here with me?' He tapped the little space next to him. 'Why can't you sleep?'

Anna sat down beside him, his arm coming around her shoulders instantly.

'Are you really asking?' She shook her head as she leaned against his sturdy frame.

'You know the truth now, you know the worst of it, you should rest,' he advised, knowing that it probably wouldn't matter. Very often the truth left more sleepless nights behind than lies.

She remained silent, trying to avoid all thought and just enjoying the way his scent wrapped itself around her. Filling her senses to the brink of oblivion. He was the only one who could make her feel so at peace after the wildest of storms. She had fallen for the right man.

'How're your hands?' He broke the silence a moment later, and she realised that for that one moment all thought had indeed vanished away. All thought but him.

'I think they are starting to heal,' she look down at her scars.

'Because everything heals, with time. Even your fair skin. So fragile now,' he brought one of her hands up to his lips and kissed her palm. '... but it will become stronger.'

'You are trying to prove a point but I would ask you not do do it,' she managed a small smile. 'I have a right to be distressed about all this, at least for tonight. I am worthy of a night of anguish for a lifetime of lies.'

He smiled. 'Of course you are,' his lips grazing at her silken hair.

Then it echoed through the darkness of the small house. Two sets of coughing. Dry and hard, almost convulsing. First the mother and then the baby.

'Your sister has been coughing a lot lately,' Anna said, worried. 'And today little Sarah was coughing so much as well.'

'Yes.' John grimaced, tightening his grip around her shoulders. 'I fear to think what can possibly come from that.'

'Why?' she looked up at him. 'Do you think they are ill?'

He sighed, 'I don't even like to say it.'

Anna placed her hand on his chest. 'Mary is a strong woman. She'll be alright.'

'Matthew was a strong man as well...'

Anna leaned her head against him again and he wrapped his other arm around her. Sitting up on his old mattress, they both fell asleep together. In the morning their bodies would ache from this position but at least, Anna had been able to rest.

XXXXXX

'How is the babe?' John asked, leaning on the doorframe of the bedroom.

Anna looked at him for one second before looking back at Mary. 'She's sleeping now.' Anna took a deep breath. 'She's burning up though.'

'Anna please,' Mary whispered. 'Let me hold her.'

The young woman walked towards the bed with the baby in her arms, placing her on her mother's restless chest. 'You should try to sleep as well.'

Mary nodded but she didn't do as Anna advised. Instead she stared at his daughter's pale face as the little girl breathed heavily and John decided it was better to leave them alone.

In the main room, he sat on a chair. His niece and nephew were playing with a rag doll on his mattress. His son was at work, selling papers under the sun… He looked at his hands, suddenly defeated.

'I found a cloth with blood.' Anna whispered behind him.

'I know...I've seen it before,' he rested his forehead on his hand. 'I tried to ignore it. I tried to convince myself everything was going to be alright... I was a bloody fool.'

'Mr Bates-'

'She's dying, Anna!' His voice rose in desperation but he immediately remembered the children were there and they could hear everything. 'She's dying, Anna.' he whispered. 'And I sat here and did nothing. This is my fault. I can't even look after myself let alone someone else.'

'That's enough.' Anna sat next to him, taking one of his hands in hers. 'I won't sit here and listen to you speak such nonsense. This is not your fault. The last thing you want is for your sister to die. How can it be your fault?'

'Because I saw her getting worse and I did nothing.'

'Mr Bates...' Anna looked down at their hands, taking a deep breath before continuing. 'If...if she's...there's nothing you can do, or nothing you could have done. You know how this is...it spreads like fire.'

John faced her before looking over at the children. 'I am so scared, Anna. I don't want my sister to die.'

Anna stood up from the chair and came near him. She wrapped her arms around his shoulders and he gladly accepted the embrace, leaning his head against her chest and relishing in the feeling of her warmth through the layers of clothing. She kissed his hair then, the smell of his sweat and fear almost breaking her into a sob. She told him everything was going to be alright and that no matter what, she would always be by his side. The tighten grip around her waist gave his doubts away. Yes, she would always be by his side, he knew that too well, now...that everything was going to be alright, he didn't believe that for a second.

XXXXXX

'How are they, Doctor?' Anna asked nervously as John sat in a chair trying his best to keep his tea down.

The doctor looked from Anna to John and sighed heavily. 'I'm afraid it's consumption.'

'Both of them?' John rose, desperately trying to hold his emotions in check.

'I'm afraid so,' Doctor Clarkson nodded apologetically. 'You should make watercress soup and tea. It does wonders for your lungs, but other than that, there's nothing else we can do. Your sister's lungs are very weak, she's been coughing blood for some time now...'

'And Sarah?' John's voice was heavy with worry.

The doctor shrug his shoulders. 'There's nothing I can do.'

John brought one hand to his mouth, dragging it along his chin. 'Thank you for coming, Doctor,' he said at last when other words failed him.

'There's no need for that, I wish I could do more for both of them. If something happens you can call me again but as I said, there's not much I can do.'

John reached in his pocket and the doctor brought his hand up. 'Please, Mr Bates. I told Miss Smith to call me whenever it was needed, as a friend more than a doctor, and I'll leave as a friend as well.'

'If that's the case then, thank you so much.' The two men shook hands.

'Oh! I almost forgot. Don't let the other children come in contact with them. The house is small, I understand it's difficult but we can't let it spread more than it already has. You two as well. Be careful.'

The doctor left and John sat back in his chair, downcast, and suddenly very weak. 'This can't be happening,' he whispered.

'They will be alright, Mr Bates, you will see.' Anna came and placed a hand on his shoulder. 'Tell me where I can find watercress and I'll make a strong soup for tonight. Mary has taught me how.'

'Don't you see...this is how Matthew started and...the children can't sleep in there anymore.'

'We can put quilts on the floor just like I do and they can sleep here with us. Just until Mary and Sarah are better, and they will be. Come, Mr Bates,' she approached him and took his hand in hers. 'Don't let yourself fall into such thoughts. Your sister is not Matthew.'

He nodded, running a hand through his already mussed hair. Then he looked at Anna and he couldn't help but smile as he thought of her words. In such distressing times she always managed to give him a glimpse of happiness. 'When will you start calling me John?'

She looked at him and chuckled. 'You once said that Mr Bates was all that I could call you.'

'That was before...all this.'

'Well then, I will call you John when we are husband and wife.'

He shook his head lovingly forgetting for a moment his troubles. 'Alright then, come with me.' He said standing up and putting on his cap.

'Where are we going?'

'To the market. We need watercress for soup.'

They checked on Mary and Sarah one more time. They were both asleep. The children were playing with outside with their friends and John asked one of the mothers to look after them while they were away.

XXXXXXX

The market was busy. The smell of dung and damp air was all around them as a crowd of merchants shouted and bargained to their customers. John had taken her hand and told her not to let it go as they made their way into the middle of the big mass of boisterous, pushing people and cattle. Spirits were high and hurried. Women's dresses drug the ground lifting the dust beneath their feet. There were children wildly running up and down, and after a while John brought Anna ahead of him, placing his hands on her shoulders and walking behind her as a bodyguard.

'This is why I didn't want you to bring your bag,' he shouted in her ear. 'Those boys are here to catch ladies by surprise.'

'Mother...' she shook her head. 'I've heard stories about how these boys grab stuff from your pockets. Be careful!' she shouted back.

'Oh, don't worry about me. If one of these lads tries to snatch from my pocket he'll go home without his little fingers,' John laughed squeezing her shoulders, making her giggle in return. 'Look!' he pointed out. 'There's watercress in that stall.'

'What do we have here?!' A tall skinny man came up to them. 'A beautiful lass like you buying in my stall? What an honour!' He bowed to her. 'What can I help you with?'

Anna stiffened and backed up against John and said nothing.

'Two handfuls of watercress,' John requested, eyeing the man with a stern warning expression on his face .

'Oh I see how it is!' The skinny man raised his brow at John while he picked the watercress. 'A true gentleman, coming with his other half to the market. Very rare I must say,' handing their purchase to Anna. 'Smart too. You can't let such a prize walk around these streets unguarded.'

'How much?' John asked, his voice loud and dry. _He better stop looking at her that way...he better stop…._

'Thrupence, sir.'

The money was exchanged and John possessively threw his arm around Anna's shoulder and hurried her away from that stall.

'But Mr Bates, we need carrots and potatoes as well,' she said, trying to make him go back.

'Yes, but let's buy it from another stall. That man was passing his marks.'

She smiled. 'I will have to learn how to defend myself next time I come alone.'

'You won't be coming alone to the market, Anna. Not ever. And not after what I saw today.'

'He was just being...' she thought for a moment, pursing her lips. 'Nice?'

John rolled his eyes. 'Some call it nice, I call it disrespectful.'

'It was quite fun coming here. Quite the adventure.' She tried to cheer him up.

'Oh my sweet lady,' he held her hand and squeeze it lightly. 'You always see the good in things, don't you?'

'That's something my mother taught me.' She looked down at their feet, her expression troubled, causing loose strands of hair to fall apart from her simple hairdo.

'Did she really?' John furrowed his brow. Mrs Smith was not a woman of such positivity, or was she?

'Elsie,' she answered as if she knew exactly what he was thinking.

XXXXXX

'Come on, Mary. Eat everything.' Anna sat besides her, bowl in one hand, a spoon in the other. 'Please...'

'I can't eat anymore,' the dark haired woman sighed, placing a hand on her wheezing chest.

'Mary, please. You have to work to get better. Your children need you.'

She smiled weakly at Anna. 'How's Sarah? Please, give her to me?'

Anna sighed as she rested the bowl on the little nightstand. She took the baby from the cot and placed her in the mother's arms.

Mary smiled down at her child. 'Do you know that cot belonged to John? And then to me and so on….'

'I didn't know,' Anna said, interested.

'Two babies died in there. John and I had two other sisters, you know. They both died in their first year.'

'I'm sorry.'

'If my baby dies, she'll die in her mother's arms.'

'Mary, don't say that.' Anna placed her hand on her shoulder. 'You have to believe that your baby will be fine.'

'It's the truth, Anna. My little girl is not growing up.' Mary cried softly as she rocked the baby in her arms. 'But it's alright. It'll be the best for eveyone.'

'Please Mary, don't...' Anna rose from her place on the end of the bed and sat beside Mary, wrapping an arm around her shoulders. Soon, Mary's head was resting on Anna's chest as she cried over her daughter. The baby's breathing was slow and difficult. Anna could see how her little face twitched every now and then, begging for more air to come in her smalls lungs, but every time that was denied, and Sarah slept uncomfortably. For a moment Anna sat there in silence, praying. She remembered when her brother died. It had been horrible, but she didn't see it happening. Now she felt like a spectator, waiting for the final curtain to open on this morbid and miserable show. If only she could close her eyes and avoid seeing Death's performance. But she couldn't. This was life, and she would not miss any of it. She would stay until the end for Mary and John's sake.

XXXXXX

'How are they?' John asked some time later, when Anna came from the room.

'They are both sleeping now.'

John sighed. 'Did she eat?'

'Not everything...she asked me to put Sarah in her arm and that's what I did.'

'You did well….God knows when it'll be the last time she'll be able hold her babe,' he sighed heavily, walking towards her.

'How are they?' Anna asked, looking over to the older children who were playing on his mattress.

'They are actually quite excited about sleeping here,' he smiled, taking her hands.

'That's good. At least they don't really understand what's happening.'

He pulled her to him and kissed her cheek lovingly. 'Thank you,' he whispered.

'Whatever for?'

'For taking care of my sister.'

Anna shook her head and smiled slowly at him. 'You don't have to thank me. I do care for her, for all of you.'

Then she faced the children. Letting go of his hands, she put a serious look on her face. 'Isn't it a bit late for such little people to be making so much noise?' She chuckled when they all turned silent and looked at her with wide eyes. 'What's your nighttime ritual?'

They all looked inquisitive.

John smiled. 'Mary scrubs them hard. Feet, hands, faces...ears.'

'But pa, Anna's not aunty Mary, is she?' William pouted.

'I am not but I hope to fill her boots as well tonight,' Anna winked.

'I can wash myself with my own spit,' the boy affirmed, bringing his hands to his mouth. 'I just need to spit on my hands and scrub myself.'

'That's nasty,' Elsa grimaced.

John rolled his eyes. 'Water will do. I'll fill the jug.'

He filled the big jug with water, half boiling and half cold. When he checked it it was at a perfect temperature. Together, Anna and John undressed the three children and scrubbed them hard, washing away all bits of dirt they could find. They tried to act as normal as they could, even though their minds were on that dark and old room, where a mother and a baby slept, unsure if either would wake up in the morning.

The children were fresh and tired and Anna sprinkled them with a bit of her lavender scent before John told the usual story at bedtime. They slept on his mattress and he slept on the floor, right in between the children and Anna.

When he woke up in the morning, his arm was over Anna's waist, and she was breathing into his chest, her nose pressed to the skin of his neck. He should have known this would happen. He had dreamed about her again, but this time her smell was even stronger and he could actually feel the warmth of her own skin on his. He thought about backing away from her, but his proper thoughts weren't as strong as his feelings. So he tightened his grip around her and she sighed in her sleep, pleased and peaceful. It was still early, the sun was hardly up, and he decided to just allow himself this pleasure for a few minutes more. Soon, she would be his like this, every night and every day and he wouldn't have to think about propriety anymore. She would be his and holding her while she slept would be the most perfect and proper act ever. One day, he would wake up next to her and she would be naked under their covers, after a night of passion and undying love.

That day would come sooner than he ever dreamed possible. It would come in less than one month. Indeed, life can change drastically in the space of thirty days...some people don't take that long to die...Mother and daughter wouldn't take two weeks.

* * *

_**Next Chapter:** John is heartbroken with the death of his sister and his little niece and Anna tries her best to keep the promises she made to Mary in her deathbed. Later, Mr and Mrs Smith have a face to face with Anna and she tells them she knows everything about hers and Elsie's past. The maid will certainly be in trouble after that. _

**_Thank you for reading :)_**


	11. Chapter 11

_**A/N:** Another chapter and more sad times to come, with some light moments of course. Life can't be just about the bad things. Anna and John start making some plans for their future. _

_Hope you enjoy! Happy Weekend to all :)_

_**Disclaimer:** Same as chapter 1 - 10. _

* * *

The baby turned cold in her mother's arms, and Mary did not cry. She rocked her child instead, as if lullabying her for one last eternal time. The room became silent and the grievous shock they all felt pierced painfully through Anna's body.

It was early in the morning. The sunlight, pale and cold, was trying to make itself known through the cracks in the door, but even that light was dark. Dark and slender like a thief in the night. Breaking into this old house, and stealing two souls away. That's when she spoke.

'Anna,' Mary called, resting one hand on the lumpy mattress. 'Please,' her voice was dry and it was difficult for her to speak. Her eyes glazed and distant, as though she was already with her baby in the afterlife.

Anna sat down besides her, while John remained on the end of the bed, head down, tears gathering in his eyes.

'You will take care of them. I know you will,' Mary whispered. 'And I know... I haven't always been kind to you...'

'Mary, don't...' Anna tried to contradict her, even though she was right.

'Please,' Mary begged. 'I haven't been the greatest of friends but I've been preparing you for what is ahead,' she breathed heavily. 'Life was difficult before but now...it will really be a challenge.'

'Don't worry, Mary,' Anna said decisively. She could no longer deny what was about to happen, not when she could see it before her very eyes. 'I will take care of them. I promise you, as if they were my own.'

'Yes...I know. You are the best thing that ever happened to John. I'm just glad he found you in time.'

Anna tried to hold her tears. She looked down at the baby in Mary's arms and sniffed. Sarah looked peaceful...so at rest..

'John?' his sister spoke. 'Come here, my brother'

He kneeled on the floor next to Anna, resting his elbows on the bed and holding his sister pale hand in his own.

'I'm here, Mary,' he smiled, caressing her dark hair with his free hand.

'Here...' she began, drawing his hand to Anna's. 'Marry her soon. As soon as you can. That is all I ask of you.'

Anna and John held hands as Mary watched them looking at each other. 'I want you to be happy. That's my only wish.'

This seemingly cold hearted woman's last words pleaded for someone else's happiness, and Anna realised that she didn't know Mary after all.

Almost one hour later, Mary breathed for the last time, finally at peace. Anna could swear she saw the exact moment of Mary's death. She was still breathing when her eyes widened for an instant; she knew exactly what was before her. Holding her child in an everlasting embrace, she sighed heavily and then she was gone, and that's how they would remain, until their bodies turned to dust.

They had cried then, their hands still entwined. John had kissed his sister's forehead and his niece's cheek, unable to stop himself from saying goodbye to them for one last time. Anna had tried not to sob but she knew how badly she was failing. His hand squeezed hers tightly until it was painful, but necessary, and she understood that was his way of begging her to hold him in her arms. And that's exactly what Anna did. She wrapped her arms around him; this broad and tall man, fitting with extreme difficulty into her petite frame. She did her best to welcome him against her chest until his arms came around her as well, and he cried into her warm restless heartbeat.

XXXXXX

Mother and daughter were laid in the same coffin. In the same position as they had departed this world; neighbours and old friends were present for their last goodbye.

It was autumn now. The days grew darker and a bit chillier. It was overcast and the world seemed to be mourning with them. Not one single leaf moved. No cry was heard. The day had barely started and people already seemed so tired. The small crowd moved along a single line, to see mother and babe for the last time, but no words were spoken, no tear was shed, it was only a quiet, respectful mourning, maybe because one of them was only a baby.

Anna remembered Elsie's words:

'_When a baby dies the heavens do not weep because another angel was born.' _

Maybe that was it. Perhaps people were sad but they knew a new angel was guiding them from above, why should they cry then?

Mary's children, Elsa and George, were leaning against their uncle's legs, trying to find support and comfort in this fatherly figure, but John, at this very moment, was the image of pain and desperation himself. He did try to smooth their hair, he had spoken to them and tried to explain what had happened to their mother and sister, but these children were not much older than babies themselves, and in the morning after their mother's death they asked after her again. And they would for the months to come. They would awake crying for their mother's arms. They would beg to hear her voice again and very often they would arouse in John the will to shout at them, '_Stop asking after your mother! Don't you understand she's not coming back?!'_ but he never did. With time he would prove how patient of a man he was.

The coffin was closed, the dirt had been thrown, and that was the last time anyone would see Mary Bates and Sarah Crawley.

William was beside Anna, holding her hand tight, staring at his heartbroken cousins.

'What is he doing?' he had whispered to Anna, when a tanned and dirty man had started burying the wooden casket. William couldn't form the words. _Why is that ugly man putting my aunty and my little cousin under the ground? _

'He's...' Anna thought for a few seconds. 'He's putting them to rest,' she said at last.

But the boy looked up at her with a questioning look on his face. Almost scared.

'There,' she pointed out to the grave. 'They won't be bothered. No one will bother them again.'

The boy nodded, unsure, but that was enough to cease his curious questions for now.

She looked around her then, taking in all the people who had come to this final goodbye. Everyone was wearing dark colours, but not because they chose them for this painful day, but because those were probably the only clothes they owned. Those thoughts brought her back to her brother's funeral, the only one she had attended before this one. Everyone had worn expensive clothes, most specially made for that not so special day. People had talked and gathered afterwards, as if that sad ceremony had only been an excuse for drinking together.

Her mother had not cried. She had been speechless for a good month after her son's death. Her father, almost the same. She also remembered Elsie, putting her to sleep, kissing her hair lovingly and telling her how much of a blessing she was. Her real mother, glad that her own child was alive.

She saw the same in these people now. Holding their own children tightly as they walked away from the cemetery. Death surfaces the selfish side of humans. A side that many try to hide. They hold their children and thank God it was someone else instead. Selfish yes, but only natural.

They stayed there until everyone else was gone, and some minutes later she felt John's hand on her back. It was sort of a caressed mixed with the hurry to get out of there. 'It's enough,' he said. 'The children need to go home...rest.'

She nodded, managing a small smile. He smiled back, heavily, hurt, but thankful. Thankful for her and for what was left of his family.

'John?' a voice struck them through the chilly air. 'I am so sorry for your loss.' Elsie looked down at her feet. A shawl around her shoulders and in proper mourning attire. She had been watching from afar and she wouldn't have said anything but for...her daughter, her future son in law, the children. She didn't have the will to turn her back and go away. 'Mrs Potter told me this morning.'

'Thank you,' his eyes turned teary. 'They are resting now.' Anna was staring at her.

The maid nodded then, and faced her daughter, and the young woman looked down at the children, trying to avoid Elsie's gaze. 'We should go home now,' she lifted little George in her arms and held him in place with one hand while the other reached for Elsa. 'Let's go William.' and she left Elsie and John behind.

'You were not expecting her to run to you and call you mother from one minute to the other, were you?' John asked, his voice was low.

'I just need her to forgive me. That's all.'

He gave Elsie a small smile. 'She already has...she just needs time to realise it.'

Head down, he bid Elsie goodbye, and soon he was again beside Anna and the children, walking slowly, as if all his energy had been buried away with his sister's body.

They arrived home at barely two o'clock. Anna busied herself with warming up soup from the big pot, and placing bowls and spoons on the table, but the children were too despondent to eat, and they soon left the table one by one, sitting on John's mattress, just staring at their hands. Funerals are indeed tiring, even for such energetic little ones as these.

Anna and John tried to eat but really didn't have much of an appetite either.

'Why don't you tell them a story?' Anna urged.

'That won't make them forget what happened.'

'No but, it might make them fall asleep.'

And she was right. While she emptied the bowls and washed them in the basin, John told the children one of his wonderful tales. This one had two princesses, who lived happily ever after for many years. Between a few tears and sad smiles, they finally slept and John sighed heavily at the sight before him.

'Neither have mothers, two of them don't have a father...how can life be so unfair for such little people?' he said slowly and stood from the floor. 'They won't even remember their mother when they grow up.'

Anna walked towards him and ran her hand up and down his arm. 'That's our job. To make sure they'll remember them forever.'

He sat down at the table again, and brought his hands to his face. 'Mary... ' he began. 'She was the last child my parents had. I had two sisters before her and they both died.' His tears gathered at his eyes. 'I was fifteen when she was born and for my parents she was a gift from heaven. She survived childhood, never had been sick. She was born strong and healthy, just like me. I remember that day,' he smiled into his hands. 'I entered the room and my mother was there, half asleep, and my father told me to take a look and when I did...I felt so much happiness. I saw her growing up, becoming a woman. I protected her from so many fights and boys, and I took care of her when our parents died.'

'Then she started living with Matthew, and he was such a fine man, a good one, you know? She became a mother and... they were happy together until last year.' John took a deep breath. 'She lived at the end of the street but she had no money to pay rent and she had two children and was pregnant with little Sarah...' He thought of his niece and the tears began to fall.

'I had to take them in else they would face the workhouse. It wasn't bad for me and my William before Mary but I wouldn't trade one bit of this miserable life for gold. We were all happy together. We didn't have much, but we had each other...I just wish I had been able to protect her from that bloody disease. It took her husband first and then her baby and herself.' His tears flowed down his cheeks. He couldn't stop them now.

'You couldn't have done anything. Just know that they are resting now,' she tried to console him.

'I've been thinking that for these past few days and it's not helping one bit, Anna. Not one bit.' He covered his face with his palms, somehow embarrassed for crying this much in front of her.

Even the strongest of men deserve some moments of weakness. So, she sat besides him, and rested her head on his shoulder while her hand caressed his shaking back. They stayed like that for a time, feeling their souls almost washed clean by their tears until there was nothing else left but a dry throat and red eyes. Anna knew that feeling all too well by now, and she relished in her experience of heartbreak and sadness. Sometimes even those awful feelings are necessary, they would make the happy moments they would share so much greater.

XXXXXX

One week passed and life slowly started to return to normal. A new kind of normal.

They had thrown Mary's mattress away, afraid the consumption would spread, together with her clothes and sheets from her bed and the baby's cot. While the children were outside, trying to bring themselves back into place and playing with the others, Anna and John cleaned the whole bedroom. Walls and floor, even the doorknobs and wardrobe. Every little corner was cleaned with boiling water and a bit of soap, and they prayed for that to be enough. They opened all the windows and let the fresh chilly air come into the house. Then they started to make plans for the future. Life must go on, for everyone's sake, and there were dreams yet to come true.

'We have to buy a mattress,' he sighed. 'And sheets.'

'I know.'

'And...' John pursed his lips before continuing. 'The bedroom should be ours,' he said at last, opening the old curtains, trying to avoid her eyes. 'We should sleep there when...we are married because, well...' he shook his head trying to mask his red cheeks. 'It has a door that we can lock and...privacy.'

Anna nodded silently. Words failing her in that moment. What was she supposed to say? Should she smile and tell him she couldn't wait? Wouldn't that sound...wanton? Wouldn't it sound like she was glad that Mary was gone? Her cheeks were flushed and her body hot and she didn't know how to react.

'I was thinking,' he continued. 'Mrs Oliver's James works in a carpentry shop and he always manages to sneak some wooden boards. Maybe I can build the children some bunks in the front room and they could sleep there and have each a bed. I think they would like that. What do you think?' He faced her now, his eyes vibrant for the first time since his sister's death.

'I think they would be very happy. They never had their own bed, and well, children do love bunks,' she smiled.

'What about the bedroom for us? What do you think?' he asked her, almost pleading for an answer.

'I think it's a good idea.'

They nodded, before he approached her. 'You decide. I don't want to-'

'No. I mean it, Mr Bates,' she said holding his gaze.

He smiled. 'Anna...' he slowly came nearer her and touched her sides gently, rubbing his thumbs in circles against the fabric of her dress. 'I am so glad you are here.' He held her waist between his hands and she fit so perfectly in them. 'All I wish now is for us to get married and have some peace in our lives.'

'That is all I want as well.' She placed her hands on his chest as he pulled her to him. She felt his racing heartbeat underneath her fingertips. They gazed at each other, both smiling and feeling the fresh air entering their lungs. Somehow the house felt almost serene, with the lazy light of autumn erupting through the windows warming its old, damp walls.

They felt joy in that moment, although there was still a strong sense of mourning lingering in the darkest corners. They felt determined to leave all sadness behind and start a new and happy life. Mary had wished it more than anything..she had begged. She had been a dramatic woman but not a mournful one, and John knew she would hate for them to be sad about something that had no solution. Thinking about his sister's words, wishing him to be as happy as he possibly could, he leaned towards Anna, until their lips met in a slow kiss.

Their kisses were more frequent now and Anna was glad of that, but sometimes, it seemed that he tried to keep his distance. She didn't know why yet. He had a way with her, she would never understand. The way his eyes hypnotized her, making her unable to look away, and how he touched her so delicately and urgently at the same time. She felt things that she was sure were forbidden. Things that she had only read about in books, very improper kind of books, truth to be told. Most of those things were foreign and strange, sometimes the intensity of what she felt frightened her. Every time their bodies touched she would feel electric jolts through her spine and when he hugged her and their chests would meet, their heartbeats would race erratically in unison and the pressure from his embrace on her breasts made her long for his hands to touch her naked skin. To have him as close to her as he could be…

They would have to be married for that, that's all she knew.

Now, what she really knew, was that she had children to feed and to care for. A house to keep up and washing to do. Yes, it would be a challenge but Anna was sure she was ready for the hard times that would come.

For John and little William, things were not a bed of roses either. They would wake up at six o'clock, every morning, and they would go downtown. Anna would prepare them a slice of bread with cheese or ham the night before and they would eat it at midday.

William sold his newspapers, screaming the breaking news of the day, trying, with his childish manners and big clever eyes, to seduce rich men to give him five pence for a morning paper.

'Mr Robbins' bankrupted due to the death of his former lawyer! The man was robbed from everything but his teeth!'

'Mr Robbins' is bankrupted?' a man in a fancy suit and bowler hat asked him.

'Oh yes, kind sir. For five pence you will be able to read the whole story! They reckon a murderer is the cause.'

'Murderer? Blimey! That Robbins always seemed a bit too fancy for my likes. Here chap, you can keep the change.'

'Thank you sir. Have a nice day in that elegant suit of yours,' the boy took his cap off and smiled and the man did the same with his bowler. At the age of seven, William Bates was indeed the finest paper seller in town.

John would sit on the most crowded street and wait with his polish box in place, all set and ready to start working. The clients were few but the ones he had paid him well. Still it wasn't enough, but he couldn't complain. Rich men often threw their old shoes away, no need for polish, and if they did, they would go to a fancy shoemaker.

It was October, the weather was turning blustery. The wind was strong in the morning and it turned to rain by noon. London was busy, dirty and crowded, but also the centre of modern world.

The day would end for both of them at four o'clock in the afternoon. William would meet John and then they would go home. Sundays were a resting day.

Today was Saturday, exactly six days after the funeral and when John arrived home, around five, it was already dark and threatening to rain again, he placed the income of the last three days on the table.

Anna looked at him, questioningly. 'What's that?'

'Money,' he sat down. 'For you.'

'For me?'

'You are the woman of this house now. You cook and you keep us clean, you know what we have to buy. So yes, the money is yours.'

'But...what about you?' she was stunned by his words.

He stood up then, and walked towards her. 'I have you and them. I'm good,' he smiled.

'If you insist. But I don't shop without you,' she furrowed her brow.

'You don't but...still. You should have the income. That's my job. To provide for you and the children.'

She chuckled. 'When you talk like that it sounds like we indeed have children together.'

John joined in her light moment, almost blushing. 'Not yet,' he took her hand and traced her fingers tenderly, looking deep into her eyes. 'We really need get married soon.'

'Yes, we do,' she said, biting her lower lip and looking down at their hands.

'I can't give you a grand wedding, I'm afraid.'

'I rather have the right man than the right wedding, Mr Bates, you should know that by now.'

He nodded. 'I know...and if you think I am that right man...then, you shall have me.'

Anna couldn't contain her happiness and she stretched her body on tip toes to place a loving kiss on his cheek. 'You're all I want.'

They smiled and he squeezed her hand in his, caressing her healed knuckles with his thumb.

'By the way...' she sighed sadly 'I want to go to church tomorrow. I want to pray for Mary and Sarah. It's been a week,' she turned serious. 'I know you are not religious but, I don't want to go by myself.'

'I'll go with you. The children can come as well. Mary taught them about God, I think she would like them to be there.'

'Yes, that's a good idea.'

XXXXXX

The church. It was the place she had visited every Sunday in her old life. The same place she would have married Charles. She looked around, memories flowing. John was beside her, her arm around his, and the children ahead, already sitting in the wooden benches.

They went at a time they knew no one from her old life would be there. Sundays at church would always be dangerous now. Mr and Mrs Smith were faithful attendees of the mass, and God forbid they would meet there.

The children behaved extremely well. They kneeled when Anna did and they did a good job with their prayers, following her word by word. John remained seated, head down in silence, praying his non-believer requests. '_I hope my sister and my niece are resting in peace...I hope they are in a better place, maybe...with Matthew, somewhere.' _

They stayed for less than an hour. And by the time they left it was almost lunch.

'Do we have everything we need at home?' John asked her as she circled his arm with hers. He walked with her proudly, almost as if he was carrying the biggest prize on his arm. He had never enjoyed a good walk as much as he did now, with his Anna by his side. On his other hand, little George was holding his thumb as they walked. His hand still too small to grasp more than one finger.

'Yes. We have bread and there's soup and cheese and a bit of ham,' Anna said. 'We have to started thinking about getting the mattresses and sheets though.'

'I talked to James this morning, he said he could get me some boards by the end of the week. He'll help me building the bunks.'

'Bunks!' William shouted.

'Like those they have at Mrs Oliver's?' Elsa asked.

'Even better,' Anna joined in their enthusiasm. 'Mrs Oliver just has two bunks, but we will have three!'

'Oh goodness, Elsa! Did you hear that?' William turned to his cousin and placed his hands on her shoulders. 'Three bloody bunks!'

'William!' John gave him a pointed look.

'He hears his father saying it...that's why he says it too.' Anna whispered over at him and he couldn't help but chuckle.

'Three bunks!' the boy grabbed his cap from his head. 'And I will sleep on top!'

'Why you?' Elsa kicked a stone on the ground.

'I am the oldest Elsa. My place is at the top. Then you, then George because he's still a baby.'

'I am not a baby,' the four year old pouted, squeezing his uncle's finger.

'Three bunks!' William walked ahead of them jumping in puddles and flailing his arms. Excitement written on his face. 'Three bloody bunks!' he called out, punching the air.

John shook his head. 'Children are easy to please. Thank God!'

They walked the streets slowly, Anna stopping to look at store fronts. Her eyes grew big at the sight of the fancy dresses and hats. She sighed.

'Maybe one day I'll be able to buy you a dress like that,' John said, standing close beside her. 'You shouldn't have sold yours.'

'Yes I should...I miss the thin fabrics and silk and lace but that's not my priority anymore. Also, I rather like this looser dress. It's easier to walk, and eat, and breathe,' she smiled up at him. 'And I take half the time to get dressed, I don't even need help anymore.'

John looked at her from head to toe as she faced the storefront once again. He would gladly help her to get dressed...but mostly to…

'You little beggar!' A shrill woman's voice made John look after his son.

'Amelia, for goodness sake!' Her husband rolled his eyes trying to hurry their steps.

'I am sorry Madam.' William looked down at his feet embarrassed.

'Get out of my sight!' The woman pushed him and the boy nearly fell. John came to his aid and caught him just in time.

'He's only a child. He didn't mean any harm.' John looked at her then, and saw Mrs Smith's cold eyes, full of realisation.

'Oh!' she smiled wickedly. 'I should have known that pest was your son, Mr Bates.'

John faced them bringing his chin up. 'Whatever is the matter?' Anna asked him with George and Elsa in tow. When she saw the sight before her she feared her heart would jump right of her chest.

'I see you've bought your harlot to _window_ shop,' Mrs Smith ridiculed. 'Which one of those will you be buying her, hmm?'

'Amelia! Enough.' Mr Smith looked at his daughter with heavy sad eyes. 'Let's go.'

John was going to answer her but before he could speak a word, Anna came from behind him and confronted her mother.

'Don't you pretend to be a woman of high moral values, Mrs Smith.'

'And don't you dare to speak to me!' the woman spat.

'Is it so hard to talk to your husband's illegitimate daughter now? Not so long ago you were planning my wedding.'

'What are you talking about?' Mrs Smith lowered her voice. Her husband was looking at Anna in shock, his cheeks red and his eyes furtive.

'I know now why you are so bitter. Now I understand,' Anna said sadly. 'You're just jealous. Your husband has never loved you, your only child died...' she looked courageously from her father to his wife. 'No man has ever wanted you...that is why you are so jealous of me and Elsie...we were wanted and loved, and she has a child while you have nothing. Everything my father didn't give you, you blamed on me. I wonder who you take it out on now? Elsie? The kitchen maid?'

John was listening, holding Anna's arm to try to calm her down. She could hear his low voice calling her name, telling her to ease down on her words, _people can hear what you are saying, please Anna. _

The children were behind them, looking at their feet and silent as mice, trying to understand what the conversation was about.

'Who told you that? Tell me!' Mrs Smith approached her and tried to grab Anna's arm, but immediately, Mr Smith stopped her.

'Are you going to start a scandal in the public eye now? Isn't it enough what you've already done?' He glared at his wife.

'Maybe it's not enough that Miss Smith ran away with a millworker?' Anna stated. 'Or do you think adding the fact that I am a bastard will help the family's reputation?' she whispered then. 'Or that you paid someone to kill Mr Bates?'

'You wouldn't -'

'I would...I would if I had to. I am not that child anymore, Mrs Smith, I am under your skirts no longer.'

'That is enough the two of you,' the business man looked desperately at his daughter. 'Anna...I...'

'Anna is no harlot, Mr Smith. We are going to get married as soon as possible. Your daughter will be my lawful wife.' John said emphatically, placing his arm around Anna's waist.

The older man nodded, and John saw a faint look of thankfulness in his downcast face. 'I see there's nothing I can do about it.' Anna shook her head no. 'Let's go, Amelia.'

XXXXXX

Anna sat down at the table, furious with herself. 'Oh God! I shouldn't have said anything! Why did I have to speak to her? Why?'

'Anna,' he kneeled before her, taking her hands in his. 'She provoked it, it was not your fault.'

'She'll sack Elsie now,' she cried. 'And it's my fault.'

'You are worried about Elsie then?'

Anna looked at him and sniffed violently. 'She raised me, didn't she? And then, I don't want to be the reason why people are sacked...father already sacked you because of me.'

'Shush, don't say that, love. In the end it was the best thing that happened to me,' he smiled.

'You called me love?' She gave him a teary smile.

'Isn't that what you are? My love?'

'You never called me that before, that's all.' Anna caressed his hand.

'You should get used to it.'

'I will.'

He rose and kissed the top of her head. 'Don't you have washing to do?' he asked.

'Yes. I have three baskets,' she sighed.

'Well then, let's go. The water is coming, I'll help you.'

Anna smiled then, walking to the baskets. 'Maybe we can finish the three today! It takes half the time with two.'

'Oh yes and let me tell you, I am pretty good at washing.' He took a basket in each hand.

'Are you now?'

'Who do you think taught my sister how to do it?'

'Your mother! She told me!'

'Well, yes, but I was there learning as well.' They both laughed and went outside with the baskets and soap. It was going to be a long and tiring day but in the end they were able to finish the all three of them.

XXXXXX

'They finally fell asleep.' John sighed in relief, sitting in his chair, dressed in his nightclothes.

'That's good. We can rest now,' she told him, washing up the dishes from dinner. 'I need to wash before bed. Is there enough water?'

'Yes, I didn't use much.'

'You should stop saving for me. I don't need that much either.'

'I am sure you do with those long locks of yours.'

She chuckled. 'I am going now, don't fall asleep without me.' She walked past him and kissed his temple before closing the bedroom door. The room that would soon be their private place as husband and wife.

Some minutes after, John stood from the chair and walked towards the fireplace. Her book of poems lay on a small shelf above the old and blackened stove. He took it, opening it in his hands. Pacing the room he turned the pages one by one, reading two or three words at time, imagining how often she had done the same. He looked up then, to see where he was going and he noticed the bedroom door slightly open. The sound of water splashing became stronger and he frowned.

Without thinking, he walked towards the door to close it, but before he could bring himself to do that, he caught a glimpse of her pale skin through the narrow opening and as much as he tried to shut his eyes and protect her from his need to see her in such state, he was unable. He could only see the figure of a woman, a woman he desired more than anything. John swallowed hard as he saw droplets of water sliding down her shoulders and caressing her breasts.

_This is wrong, John! _ he said to himself, but he was mesmerized by her beauty, so he stood there watching her until he almost dropped the book.

She dipped her hands in the water and began to wash herself, dragging her fingertips along her skin, throwing back her head and closing her eyes at the sensation. He shut the door then, ever so slowly, trying his best not to make any noise. His heart racing, he went to his mat on the floor, laying down, covering his body with an old sheet.

'Oh God...' he whispered. She was so much more beautiful than he had even imagined. His desire was pulsing against his bottoms and he fought the enormous urge rushing through his brain to push open that bedroom door and take her in his arms. It made him almost unable to think properly. _We are going to be married soon_, he told himself. They would be married and then he could make her his own.

The way she had closed her eyes while she bathed herself...would she do the same when his hands touched her? Would she even let him touch her so intimately once they were married? He hoped so. Anna was not a prudish woman...or at least, he didn't think she was.. All he wanted was to be able to worship her in every way possible….

'Mr Bates?' Her voice made him jump.

'Anna!'

'I told you not to fall asleep without me,' she smiled.

'I wasn't sleeping,' he said nervously, bringing his sheet up.

'You had your eyes closed, I thought you were.' She finished braiding her damp hair.

'I was just resting them...that's all.' He cleaned his throat and opened the book.

'Are you quite alright?' She sat down on her quilt and touched his arm.

'Yes!' He backed away from her. 'I'm alright, it's just...I am so tired and William and I have to wake up early in the morning. I should get some rest.' He handed her the book and smiled shyly. 'Sleep well, Anna.'

'You too, Mr Bates,' she said pursing her lips, trying to understand why he was so eager to sleep. She shook her head then and smiled before placing a kiss on his cheek.

He didn't move or say anything, but he smiled at her and watched as she turned her back to him and rested her head on the pillow. When he heard her heavy breathing and was sure she was sleeping, he turned on his side facing her, and he fell asleep in that position, just enjoying the sight; sure she would be there when he woke up. Later that night his hand would slip around her waist and he would come closer to her, dangerously closer.

As usual, he dreamed of her. And in his dreams, Anna would come to him with a gentle smile on her face and he would kiss her hands or the soft skin of her neck. She would be wearing a white or light blue gown and her hair was always braided or up in a knot, and he would smell wildflowers and feel the sunshine. Not this night though. Maybe because he could feel the warmth of her skin spreading through his arm and down his body. Maybe because of what he had witnessed earlier.

This night, he was the one coming to her. He walked to his mattress and she was there, under the old quilt. Her hair was loose and her blonde locks cascaded around her. Her head on his pillow and she called his Christian name. _'John...come here,'_ she whispered in the night and he kneeled down on his bed, kissing her lips as he did so.

Her eyes were dark in his dream, and her smile was flirtuous, making him shiver as she bit her lower lip. Forgetting all thoughts of propriety and honour he had dragged the quilt from her body and she was naked before him. John couldn't make a sound as he took in her glorious body, staring at her as if she was a treasure, and to him she was.

_'You are beautiful,'_ he had said to her before touching the soft skin at her thigh.

In his dream, she had pleaded for him to take her, and he didn't think twice before aligning their bodies and kissing her lips again. When he awoke, sweating and panting, his arm was still resting around her and he felt the heat in the lower part of his body.

Carefully, he backed away from her and laid on his back, looking at the ceiling and sighing, bringing the sheet to his waist. _Oh God, help me_, he thought, _we need to sort things out soon. _

John Bates was not often a man in a hurry. He was patient and caring, but he had never loved so urgently, and no woman had ever slept so wonderfully in his arms. The feeling of completion came so close every time they were like this, with every kiss and touch they shared. A feeling he so longed for without even knowing it. He did feel like a young man, in the peak of foolish desire and lust. He loved her so much, so desperately, and more than that, he _needed_ her, and he wouldn't wait too long before making her his wife. Properly. As society required. He was desperate to be happy with her and he was equally eager to make her happy with him.

XXXXXX

In the late hours of that same night, Elsie Hughes walked the streets of London. A bag in each hand and a resolute look on her face. Carrying a lifetime of experience and disappointment on her back.

There was one time she thought she would grow old and die in that mighty house, or in one where Anna would want to bring her after an arranged and wealthy marriage. That would not be happening now. She had been sacked hours before. She had been called names, but at the moment she didn't care. She was a mother herself, and she did have dreams for her child. Dreams of comfort and status, dreams that now would never come true. All she wanted was for Anna to have a happy and long life...but she had seen her happiness with John Bates. Maybe that is the biggest treasure in one's life. Love and courage. And Anna had both.

Elsie stopped before entering the darkest of streets, the one that would lead to where they lived. She rested her bags on the ground and traced one hand with the other...if only she could see her own future...all that she knew was that her daughter was at the pinnacle of her twenty first year of life and had never experienced so much heartbreak and misery. Not one year had passed and her world had changed drastically, and she would be a wife before this month of October was finished.

One day, in the future, after many years have passed, Anna would remember this year as the most memorable of her life. The year when her life truly began. And Elsie would cradle her grandchildren in her arms and know she had played her part in this story. A fundamental part. She took her bags again before diving into the darkness of one of London's poorest streets, she took a deep breath and prayed for those golden days to come.

* * *

**_Next Chapter: _**_Anna and John's wedding! _

**_Thank you for reading :) _**


	12. Chapter 12

_**A/N:** A happier chapter this is. Big as well. Things happening and lives moving along. Anna and John will be finally "official". Hope you enjoy and wish you all a grand weekend!_

_Ps: Thank you all for you reviews, faves and follows. I don't thank you enough, I know, and I'm not very good at replying (shame on me) but know that every single one of them brightens up my day and makes me want to write more and more :) thank you so much! _

_**Disclaimer:** Same as chapter 1-11. _

* * *

_Time to take a deep breath. And another one, and certainly not the last._

Elsie had seen John leaving with William that morning. The father had shined a red apple on his sleeve and gave it to his son, then patted the boy's head. William smiled up at his pa and they both set off for work before the cock had crowed.

She had waited then. The curtains of their house had been closed for two more hours before she saw Anna's figure opening them. And still, she waited two hours more.

Finally, she took a deep breath and knocked on the door. The noise of a crying child came to her ears. Not a crying really...a constant whimpering.

'Please, George, why don't you go play...' Anna's voice died when she opened the door, the blood in her veins slowing. She turned pale for a second, before the unbearable pulsing of her heart raced in her ears once again.

'Hello...Anna.' Elsie said, managing a small, nervous smile.

The younger woman only nodded. Her mouth half opened, her eyes doing their best to avoid her real mother's face. Her heart was wild in her chest. Tears filled her eyes, threatening to spill over and she flexed her jaw. How could she have the courage to face Mrs Smith but when her real mother stood before her all her strength vanished...

'No!' the whimpering from the child turned into an angry demand. 'Go away!'

'George, please!' That's when Anna rushed inside again in aid of the little boy. She sat on the mattress where George was seated, head in his hands and a river of tears running down his red face.

His sister was looking at him, trying to make him stop crying, cheering him up, but George didn't take his sister's advances nicely. 'Don't be so mean to your sister, George.' Anna hugged the boy and he continued his complaining into her chest. 'She's just trying to help.' Elsa nodded emphasising Anna's words but the girl too was on the verge of tears.

'You may come in,' Anna spoke to Elsie at last.

'I was not expecting you to invite me in,' the former maid said.

'Have you forgotten what you taught me about social rules and guests?' Anna replied, rocking the little boy.

'I didn't know I was a guest. A visitor...yes.'

'You're not a stranger, Elsie.'

'I've been sacked.' The time for rounded words and hesitations was last gone.

'What?' Anna stood up from the mattress and walked towards Elsie. She sighed apologetically. 'It is all my fault.'

'It sure isn't. If there's someone to blame...that should be me, and your father.' Anna looked down at her feet. 'I've come here to ask your permission. I don't want you to think that I'm imposing or that I am following you...'

'My permission?'

'As you know, I have no one in this life.' She looked at Anna with longing eyes. _No one but you._ 'I have nowhere to stay so...I have a friend here, an old friend. Just around the corner.' She took another deep breath followed by a sigh. 'I asked her for a roof until I could find somewhere to go and she ever so kindly offered me a bed for as long as I need and two meals a day. And now I am asking you if...if I can stay.'

'Why are you asking me that?'

'As I said, I don't want you to think I'm imposing myself on you. I don't want you to hate the fact that I live just around the corner and that you will probably see me more than you would like.'

'Elsie,' Anna sat at the table and rested her forehead in her hand. 'You were never my tormenter. The sight of you is not unbearable to me. Far from it.'

'I feel like I've forced you to live a lie.' She walked forward, slow, careful.

'I realise now how much I am like you.' She faced her mother. 'If I hate you, I'll hate myself, and that I won't do.'

'Am I forgiven then?' Elsie's face lit up slightly but not enough to push all the shadows away. Too much was still uncertain...

Anna looked down at the table and gave a teary smile. 'For trying to give me a better life? Is that even a sin? Is there anything to forgive?' she looked at the children. Elsa was now sitting beside her brother but interaction was nearly impossible to achieve. 'I don't have children of my own but...for once I understand all you did for me.'

'I was right then,' Elsie whispered. The shadows giving way to a ray of hope.

'About what?'

'When I read your palm...I saw so much pain...but pain that would make you stronger, kinder, and wiser. You are the kind of person who will grow with every battle, the kind of person everyone should be.'

'You can stay, Elsie.' Anna stood, decisively. Her chin up. Elsie felt so much pride. They smiled at each other, and although Elsie longed for a hug from her daughter, that was not to be, but she felt sure the future would bring them together, and maybe one day soon Anna would call her mother.

Anna was still. Smiling tearily, but she didn't move. She had never hugged a mother before...she didn't know what to do. And then the boy cried again as his sister tried to touch his shoulder.

'Ma!' he shouted.

'What's the matter with him?' Elsie asked as Anna approached the children again.

'He misses his mother,' she said, sitting back down on the old mattress, trying to soothe the unhappy little boy.

'I keep telling him that mummy's in heaven looking after us. Isn't she, Anna? She's looking after us,' Elsa pouted.

'She is, my darling.' Anna's hand came around the girl's shoulder and she rocked the two of them on her chest.

'But I don't want...I want ma here,' the boy began his sobbing again.

Elsie stood there, watching the sight before her. A young woman mothering children for the first time in her life, while they cried for their own mother. Her Anna was so young. Less than an year ago she would have called her a girl. Even a child. Not anymore. She was now a woman. A woman with responsibilities and people to take care for. And while Anna rocked the little ones, Elsie wondered who had taught her all that.

Little did she know that everything that Anna knew had come from her. Even how to be a mother.

XXXXXX

'Pa!' William shouted at the end of the street, running to his father as John closed his polish box. He smiled at the sight of that energetic little boy. Easy eyes and joyful expression, as if the world around him was the best place to be. His son was born with such happiness in him, and John was so thankful for it. That would make his life so much easier, so much better. The light in the boy's eyes told him, that he would be a great man one day. How? He didn't know yet. But he was sure William would grow up to be someone. Someone more than a humble and poor soul.

'Come on, lad.' John patted his head. 'Let's go home. Anna must be waiting for us already.'

'Pa? I've been having an idea today,' the boy said. The freckles on his face twisting with his skin as he furrowed his brow in thought.

'Have you now?' John chuckled. A tale was about to be told. A teller of tales his son would be.

'When we were going to work I saw these pretty flowers.' William held his father's free hand. 'Maybe...only maybe, we could pick them up and you could give them to Anna.' John stopped and looked down at his son. He smiled. 'They are right in the alley by the jewelry shop. Only because I think she would like that, plus there's no money for gold so flowers would do, wouldn't they, pa?'' the boy tried to explain his reasons.

'I think she would like that very much,' his father agreed. William would often surprise him. 'Where did you get that idea from?' they continued walking.

'Sam. He said girls like when boys give them flowers. It makes them sigh and smile and get all dreamy.'

John laughed, 'Indeed.'

'And then she'll be your wife so you must treat her kindly.' The lad kicked at a rock on the ground.

'Have you been eavesdropping again?' John squeezed his hand in scolding manner but he had to chuckle at his son's views.

'I promise I didn't do such thing, but you see, sometimes I am asleep but I'm not really, yet.'

John shook his head with a hearty smile on his face. 'Listen, son.' he sighed, resting his box on the ground and kneeling before the boy. 'Anna...she will be like a ma to you, in fact, she'll be the only ma you will ever know, but you must remember one thing for the rest of your life: as much as you love Anna, and as much as she loves you, your real ma is Vera. You must remember that, always.'

William nodded and looked down at his feet for a moment before a wide smile formed on his lips. He looked at his father. 'Pa, I just thought of something!'

'What's that, lad?' John rose and swung the box over his shoulder.

'Aren't I the luckiest boy on earth? I have two mas! I have one in heaven looking after me, and I have one at home too!'

John laughed. 'That's exactly how it is, my boy. Now let's go pick those flowers before it starts raining again. Lucky that we have flowers in October.'

'Daisies are like bastards. They go 'round all year.'

'William, where do you hear such things?' John scolded.

'You said that last week when you were talking to James.' William dropped his head apologetically.

'Must I tell you a million times that the things you hear me saying are not for being repeated? Specially bad words like that.'

'But, pa, why do you say them then?'

'Let's go get those flowers, now. Anna's waiting.' He pulled his son by the hand and the boy followed his father, walking besides him with a proud smile on his face. When William was only a very young boy, people would often tell John that he was too sure of himself, that he was born with a king on his belly, they would say, but that was far from the truth. William had a proud soul filled with kindness and a proper amount of childish mischief, and a gift for storytelling. More than that, his son was fair and smart, logical even. Maybe he was a king indeed, if only in his heart.

XXXXXX

Father and son had arrived a little later. Picking flowers always takes its time and William made sure all the flowers were about the same height and the petals were perfect.

'_Pa, that one has a black thing.' _

'_A black...where?'_

'_Here,' _the boy had pointed out a little spot on the yellow bud, barely visible.

'_Oh yes.' _John had shaken his head with a chuckle._ 'You're right. Let's leave this one then.' _

When they arrived and Anna saw John carrying the bouquet, her heart jumped in her chest. No one had ever offered her flowers, and those simple daisies were the most beautiful thing she had ever seen. Once, she had dreamed of roses or even tulips, and ties with expensive laces, but now she knew that the importance of such act was the person who provided it and not the price or how exotic the gift was.

She said nothing about it, and only smiled at him. John kissed her temple in front of the curious eyes of the children and he gave it to her.

'A simple bouquet of daisies for a precious rose,' he smiled at her and blushed at his own words. _Since when do you say such things, John Bates? _

'Thank you,' her voice was no more than a whisper. 'They are far from simple, they are beautiful.' She kissed his whiskered cheek, his stubble scratching against her lips, a wonderful and enticing sensation.

'Maybe one day I'll be able to offer you red roses,' he said.

'Red?' her eyes shone at him.

He nodded, his gaze burning against her own. 'Anna...'

'George stop!' Elsa hollered.

'Whatever is the matter?' Anna asked looking over at the children.

'George pinched me,' Elsa cried.

'You pinched me first!' the boy replied pouting. William remained silent at the table.

'Why can't you just get along today?' Anna sighed tiredly.

'Are they giving you too much trouble?' John asked.

'They've been fussing and fighting all day. I was out to do some washing before it started raining and all they could do was fight and shout. I had to stop my work and bring them inside. George has been difficult today,' Anna whispered.

John sat down on the chair and called little George to his lap. The boy gladly obeyed and rested his head against his uncle's warm chest, feeling his safe and strong arms tightened against his small frame.

'Also...' Anna sat next to them. 'Elsie was here this morning.'

'Here?' he asked, surprised.

'Here. We talked.' Anna looked down at her hands resting on her legs, then back at John. The look on his face told her to continue. 'She came to ask my permission to stay here, I mean, not here, but in a friend's house, just around the corner.'

'Laura's house, I'm sure. They were good friends.' John remarked. 'What ever for?''

'She wanted to be sure I didn't think she was trying to impose herself.'

'I see... What did you say?'

'I said she could stay and...' she fiddled with her fingers nervously, 'she asked me if she was forgiven.'

'Is she?' he asked but already knew the answer. He smiled then and told the boy on his lap to go play with his cousins without any fuss. '_I'll be cross with you, George. You be a good lad._' He patted the boy's head before dragging his chair closer to Anna and taking her nervous hands in his steady ones. 'Both you and Elsie long for a bit of peace in your lives, and you shall have it.' She looked up at him. 'She's your mother, the one woman who always loved you and you loved her just as much. Even when she told you the whole truth. Deep inside, you always thought of her as your mother. All that you are now is due to her.'

'I know,' Anna squeezed his hands. 'All I want is to tell my mind what my heart already feels. I told her there was nothing to forgive. I saw she was happy to hear that but...that's all I could do.'

'Give yourself time. This will all work out, you'll see.' John kissed her knuckles, smiling at her and it looked like there was more he wanted to say.

'What?' Anna asked.

He only smiled that enigmatic smile and stood up. His eyes promised her the world and set her mind on fire. There was so much more he wanted to say but couldn't yet. The children were playing, and he sat down next to them, but his eyes didn't leave hers for a moment.

_Tonight_, he thought to himself, he would ask her tonight.

He'd been thinking about it for so long. Every day. How to do it? Which way would be best? Should he get down on one knee? Should he take her hands in his and tell her right away without any hesitation? And then the perfect idea came to him that very afternoon. Now he just needed to wait until the children were asleep. Tonight he would ask her to be his wife, for better and for worse.

So he waited.

Some hours later, after dinner, a good face scrub and a bedtime story, the children were finally asleep. Even George had been easy to put to bed, managing a few giggles as Anna brushed his hair and sprinkled his nightshirt with two drops of the scent; maybe spending the day crying and arguing with his sister had made him extra tired.

When John was sure they wouldn't wake up any time soon, he took Anna's hand in his and asked her to follow him.

She already knew where they were going... the rooftop, their special place.

The weather was chilly and it would begin raining again soon. Even now Anna was sure she could feel a soft drizzle on her face, but none of that mattered. He wanted her here, and here she would be. His eyes had been teasing her all night and she wouldn't walk away without knowing why.

Once on the rooftop, he stood looking at the cloudy grey sky, still holding her hand, the warmth of their skin contrasting tremendously with the chilly air.

Finally, after a moment, he walked away from her, letting go of her hand. His back was to her, his eyes still fixed on the moving clouds...then he began. His voice was low and there was thunder rumbling in the distance, but she could still hear him.

**'_Let me not to the marriage of true minds_**

**_Admit impediments. Love is not love_**

**_Which alters when it alteration finds,_**

**_Or bends with the remover to remove:_**

**_O, no! it is an ever-fixed mark,_**

**_That looks on tempests and is never shaken;'_**

He turned around then and his daring eyes were back, speaking to her, dancing with her soul. She felt tears on her lashes. He continued...

**'_It is the star to every wandering bark,_**

**_Whose worth's unknown, although his height be taken._**

**_Love's not Time's fool, though rosy lips and cheeks_**

**_Within his bending sickle's compass come;'_**

His hands came to hers and he pulled her to him. His voice echoing in her ears. The night was cold, the rain began in earnest; but Anna had never felt so warm in all her life.

**'_Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks,_**

**_But bears it out even to the edge of doom._**

**_If this be error and upon me proved,_**

**_I never writ, nor no man ever loved.'_**

He whispered the last words in her ear and ever so slowly he drew his nose along her cheek until it touched her own. They smiled then, and unable to control himself any longer, he captured her lips with his, kissing her urgently, demanding solace in the taste of her tongue, and she gladly opened to him; fulfilling her own need to have more of him, always more. His hands were around her middle, bringing her as close to him as possible, as hers moved to the back of his neck, caressing the hair she found there.

In all their kisses, this kiss was the most passionate, maybe for what it meant, for what was to come. And now, for the first time, she wasn't afraid of what she felt, of the intensity at which her body burned for his, the need to have him, the want for him to do all those things she had read about. No, she was not afraid anymore. She was excited, and more, she was utterly happy, as John let his own desire free, even if only for a moment.

'Anna Smith...' he breathed in when they broke apart. A wonderful smile was playing on his lips, his eyes closed, and their foreheads pressed together. 'Will you marry me?'

'A hundred times yes,' she kissed him, and she felt him grin against her lips. 'I would be honoured.'

'Here,' he backed away just enough and took a handkerchief from his jacket pocket, opening it. 'My mother's wedding ring,' he said, his voice cracking. The ring was on a dark golden chain. 'It won't fit your finger,' he smiled. 'Mother was a slightly larger woman, but you can wear it around your neck.'

'I will wear it until my dying day, John Bates. I shall never take it off.' With that,he slipped the chain over her head and the ring fell right in the middle of her breasts. He touched it and pressed it against the fabric of her dress, and she took a deep breath, knowing he could feel her heart beating against his palm, warm and steady, longing to make her his own.

'And I shall honour you and love you my whole life. You and the children that we will conceive together.'

Anna smiled, tears threatening to fall. 'That's a wonderful prospect, Mr Bates.'

'That, and also that soon you will be calling me John.' They laughed lovingly.

'And I'll soon be Mrs Bates,' she giggled.

John looked at her and sighed tenderly, caressing her cheek with the back of his hand. 'All I wish is that you may fulfil all your dreams in the hold of that name, and that you will be so very happy.' He gently kissed her forehead.

'My dream is already fulfilled,' she whispered. 'You are my dream. The only one I ever had.'

'Let's go now, it truly has started to rain,' John said at last, before kissing her lips once more. 'The rest of our lives is just around the corner,' he told her while they walked home, his arm around her shoulder. 'Tomorrow I'm going to the registrar to book the date. Do you have any preference?'

'As soon as possible. That's my preference.' she smiled.

'Alright then, but...' he thought for a second. 'Aren't there any days that...um...we shouldn't marry?'

'Bad luck days, you mean?'

'No I mean...you know...' They entered the house and their voices became low.

'Mr Bates, I have no idea what you are talking about.' Anna smiled as he sat down at the table. His face was serious and he was more than a bit flushed.

'You see...' She approached him as he continued. 'Women must decide the date so the wedding night... doesn't coincide with their...' he whispered, turning red, '...cycle. '

'Oh goodness!' Anna opened her mouth.

'Didn't you know that?' John asked, taking a deep breath.

She shook her head no and sat down, looking at her hands shyly. 'I never thought about it, I mean...moth- Mrs Smith chose my ...other wedding day herself, I didn't know.'

'Probably because she knew when you...or Elsie.'

'Elsie knows.'

'Well then...which days are bad days?' John asked again, his cheeks and ears burning. Anna couldn't look at him.

'It's always in the beginning of the month,' she whispered.

'Alright, then. So mid November?'

'In a month, that's good. It will give us time to prepare everything.' She smiled, trying to relax.

'That's perfect then, I'm going there tomorrow and in a month or so we will be married,' his redness faded and he smiled back at her.

'We should try to find a mattress and bedding. When is James coming?'

'He will come tomorrow to take some measurements for the bunks and Sunday we can go to the market.'

'It's settled then.' She rose, 'I should go wash.'

John nodded and she closed the bedroom door behind her. But they wouldn't have one month to prepare everything. One week would have to do.

XXXXXX

Like every morning, for the past month, John sat on his blanket on the floor and for a few minutes he stared at her. She always slept on her side, with her mouth slightly opened and a hand under her pillow. The loose strands of golden hair framed her face, while her braid draped over her shoulder. This morning her lids were still and he could see that she was in deep sleep. He smiled and caressed her loose braid. Sometimes he would caress her cheek, or her back. Other times he would run a hand down her arm or trace the skin of her neck, but he loved when he could feel the silk of her hair against his fingertips. If only he could kiss her cheek now and tell her how much he loved her. He could do it. Why not? They would be married soon...but he controlled himself. He wanted to save those magic moments for married life. After all, this was all so new to him as well. He had been married before, yes but...not really.

'William,' he whispered, running his hand along his son's hair. 'Wake up son. Time to go to work.'

The boy yawned lazily and rubbed his fists over his eyes. 'I could swear I was living in a palace.'

'Sorry, lad. It was only a dream.' John smiled. 'Come on now. You can't be late.'

Soon they left the house and a few hours later Anna opened the curtains and placed the glass of daisies on the windowsill. She smiled at them and at the memory of last night. She would be a wife soon...she couldn't wait. The children were awake right after the first light of the day shone through the house and Anna noticed for the first time the smell of damp was gone. She twisted her nose.

'May I help you?' Elsie asked after lunch when Anna was outside doing the washing. 'It takes half the time with two.'

Anna smiled. 'If you don't mind.'

'I don't.'

'Mr Bates is going to the registrar today,' Anna said as she soaped a shirt. 'To settle the date for our wedding.'

'That's nice! And when will it be?' Elsie asked eagerly.

'In a month or so. Mid November.'

Elsie nodded. 'You are happy, aren't you?'

'I couldn't be happier. It's all I've ever dreamed off.'

'Oh I know. Since when you were old enough to dress up your dolls.'

'It was different then. I could never have imagined I would end up here...marrying a mill worker, with no reception or wedding dress,' she sighed, 'and I couldn't be happier. I now know what real love is, Elsie,' she grinned.

'No reception, yes but, you will have a wedding dress.'

'Will I?'

'One of your old dresses.'

'I sold them, Elsie. We need the money. Money that will buy us a mattress and bedding now,' she explained.

'Well...there's one dress left.' Anna looked at Elsie with questioning eyes. 'I was mending one of your dresses when Mrs Smith packed the others away. It was in my room, that's why I still have it. I brought it with me.'

'My ivory dress.' Anna remembered ripping the hem when she walked in the garden. A wide smile formed on her lips.

'I also brought your doll,' Elsie said. 'And your favourite hairpin. I was wondering...' she pursed her lips unsure. 'May I do your hair for your wedding day? Please?'

Anna smiled. 'Of course you can, Elsie. I would like that very much. I want you to be there too, as my witness.'

Elsie resumed her task, hitting a pair of bloomers against the stone, trying to mask the tears that were about to slide down her cheeks. 'It will be an honour to be at your wedding.' Indeed an honour. To be invited by her own daughter to her wedding, to marry the man she truly loved. It was more than an honour. It was a dream came true.

The whole day went by just as easily. Elsie and Anna washed and hung a basket of clothing that later William would take to its owner. James, Mrs Oliver's eldest son, came by and took the necessary measurements for the bunks and told Anna that tomorrow he would have the boards and would be ready to start building them. Elsa and George were excited about it and they couldn't wait for their uncle and cousin to arrive home to tell them the latest news...the kind of news William couldn't sell.

At night, when they were all having dinner John brought up the subject of the wedding.

'I've booked the registrar.' Everyone looked at him with curious eyes.

'When for?' Anna asked. A delicious smile playing on her features.

He sighed unsure, but looked at her with excited eyes. 'Friday.'

'Tomorrow?' her eyes grew wide.

'The next one,' he smiled.

'In one week?'

'I'm sorry. Mid November was impossible. They were only free in January. Apparently people like to get married around Christmas. Actually, Friday was already booked as well but there was a cancellation and it's mid October so I thought... we didn't want to wait that long... I can go back tomorrow and...'

'No! One week is perfect,' she smiled broadly. 'We really need to find a mattress and bedding as soon as possible.'

'So...' William scraped his spoon around the side of his empty bowl. 'Does this mean I'll have to get a proper bath?'

'You and everyone else,' John pinched his cheek. 'Hair and everything.'

The boy sighed heavily and the other two grimaced.

'If you would do as you wish, you would soon be rolling in the mud like piglets,' Anna chuckled.

'Piglets...those bastards have a good life, they do.'

'William!' John eyed his son and the boy shrunk on his chair.

There was cheese at the table and juicy oranges and the high spirits of hope. Yes, life was hard still, but these past weeks had been kind to them. Elsa and George would always miss their mother and baby sister, but as the days passed so did their sad tears for the most part. And this house was filled with so much love.

XXXXXX

Now, some days in October love to pretend winter is not just around the corner. Today was just like one of those days. The sun was shining brightly, enough to warm the air, and the clouds had vanished.

It was Friday. That special Friday for them. One week had passed in the blink of an eye and the preparations had been rushed but enjoyed. They found their mattress at a friend's house. Alex, an undertaker for more than thirty years. The same man who had buried Mary and Sarah. He had started working at his depressing job at the age of fourteen but his toothless smile and watery eyes gave away the gladness he had for life. Two of the three sons that still lived with him had moved away to the country to work on a fruit farm and he had a double mattress to spare now.

'_It's catching the dust and damp from this old house. Better to be used than wasted.' He had said. 'Don't you worry, John, my sons were __good_ _boys, no sickness or coughs while sleeping here. You give it a good whisk outside before you take it in. No worries.' _

'_Thank you, Alex, I won't be able to thank you enough.' _John shook his hand.

'_Fill that house with __little nippers__, that's a way to say thanks for a marital bed.' _

John had chuckled with a flush rushing through the veins of his neck, and feeling glad that Anna had stayed at home. Alex, was known as a man of little thought before letting the words leave his mouth. That, and for the eleven children that he had been able to sire. Sadly, only five of them were still alive and only one lived with him now. But above all, Alex was a good man.

The bunks were also finished. James was a good and hard worker and with John's help they were able to complete them before the week was out. It had been a simple task really, they had a good wall for support, that was half the job done. The mattresses had been the difficult part. They filled the bunks with hay and some horse hair and with second hand bedding that they got at the market and finally the children each had a bed of their own. Anna and Elsie had covered their sleeping space with a big, heavy curtain that would be closed during the day and the beds wouldn't be visible. It would make the front room so much more presentable.

In one week, this old house had been transformed. It seemed bigger now, lighter. It didn't smell damp. The window curtains were now always opened and the sunlight was able to reach every dark corner.

Anna was the reason. The lack of disease as well. And the prospect of a happy future together. Houses are to be enjoyed and cared for. To be dreamed on and that's what it was missing.

Now, the children laughed, each in their beds. The dear ones gone were smiling from above, or from wherever they were, rejoicing in the living's happiness. Mary had been dead for less than a month but somehow the mourning was over. John felt it in the air he breathed. He missed her, yes, but he felt peace. At first he felt guilty. Feeling such happiness must be wrong when his sister and niece had been buried such a short time ago...but something told him to stop it. _Don't you dare to feel sorry for what's lost. Make the most of what life is giving you now._ He swore he could hear his sister's words echoing in his head, so he allowed himself to get lost in Anna's smile and the sway of her hips as she moved around, tidying their soon to be room.

The night before their wedding they had spent making the bed and moving some things. They only had one nightstand so Anna found an old stool to put on his side of the bed.

'I can have the stool, Mr Bates, I don't mind.'

'Nonsense. You have your bottle of scent and your book, your hairpins and the brush. You need it more than I do. I can have the stool.' He also was able to buy her a small mirror to embellish the old table. A bride needs something new to give her luck. The sheets and the mattress didn't count.

That night found them sitting on the edge of the bed, facing each other, their hands touching.

'I'll be the happiest man alive tomorrow.' He looked at their entwined fingers. 'I already am but tomorrow it will be official and proper.'

'There's one thing I've always wondered about,' she told him and he smiled, sensing what she was going to say.

'I didn't marry her because I loved her,' he began, taking fully hold of her hand. 'She had no one. Her mother died and her father didn't take long to follow. My mother took her in, and then...' his voice caught in his throat and he sighed. 'We were young...she was... fetching... I took her honour before we were married and she told me she would never have any other man but me. I promised my mother I would take care of her, just like I did with Mary. I don't really know... it was convenient, we had been together already, she had no one and I needed a wife, a family. I wouldn't leave her like that, alone in the world and with damaged goods. Mother wouldn't have approved if she knew, so I married her.'

Anna listened attentively. Her eyes grew soft at his honest words and her hand was sure on his. 'Then William came?'

'No. We...' he shook his head, 'we didn't really live as a proper married couple. Just...sometimes. It was hard for both of us. I didn't love her and she knew it. She chose to be my wife all the same and when she asked me for a child,' he sighed heavily. 'That's all I could give her. A child. And that's what killed her too.' A tear slid down his face.

'It's not your fault.'

'I never loved her, Anna, and when I gave her a child she could truly love and who would love her back, she died.'

'Don't you see?' Anna said, caressing his face. 'That she was happy while she waited for that child, and that you gave her what she asked for? That she's still alive in that beautiful boy of yours.'

He chuckled softly. 'Why are you smiling?' she asked.

'She told me exactly that on the night William was born.'

Anna smiled at him. 'You did your best and I'm sure she's thankful to you.'

John brought her hand to his lips. 'I have never met a more understanding creature as you, Anna.' he shifted on the bed and came closer to her, looking one last time at the bed they were seated on. 'Tomorrow night we will be here, in this bed, and I will love you so much.'

'It will be one night I will never forget,' she said looking down shyly.

'To add to all the other nights we'll share.' Gently, he took her face between his hands and pulled her to him, kissing her slowly and languidly. One last innocent kiss before they began their married life. One last night of aching desire before their bodies met properly, as one.

XXXXXX

'William, uncle is going to be upset if we aren't there in time!' Elsa begged, worrying as she walked hand in hand with her brother, following William down the road.

'Don't you come then, stay at home.' William replied. 'I am going to pick some flowers for my ma and you won't stop me. Didn't you say brides need flowers?'

Elsa nodded to herself but suddenly she pouted and faced the ground, refusing to walk. 'What's the matter with you? Are you going to cry now?' The girl nodded. 'Come on Elsa, what's the matter?' he sighed coming to hold his cousin's hand.

'You've got a new ma and I've got no one,' the girl sobbed, looking over at her brother.

George was watching the two of them with a serious look on his face but after his sister's words he started crying too.

'Didn't Anna say she was like a mother to you now? I heard her saying that the other night, am I wrong? If she said it she meant it. Anna tells no lies. That's stuff her family does, not her,' he told his cousin, squeezing her hand.

'Does that mean we are like brother and sister then?' the girl asked, her tears marking her cheeks.

'We share the same room and the same bath water. What else do you want to prove it? George, you and I are three of a kind. Pa says that all the time, doesn't he? And that's what we are, Elsa. Forever, I promise you.' William dried the girl's tears. 'Now let's go get those bloody flowers before we arrive home two days after the wedding.'

Seeing the broad smile on his sister's face, George did the same and the three children went on with their mission of finding the freshest daisies they could find, and if they could sneak some other kind of flower from a proper garden it would be worth the risk.

While the children were away Anna sat on a chair in the bedroom. Her ivory dress on together with the happiest of smiles. Elsie was doing her hair, the way she used to do, with joy written on her face. Her daughter was going to get married today and she would be there to witness it.

'You are the most beautiful bride I've ever seen, my child,' Elsie commented without realising the meaning that those words held now, but Anna did.

As her former maid worked on her hair, Anna thought of everything that had happened in her life up until now. In this new life of hers she had seen misery and heartbreak, it was true, but also she had never been so joyful. Emotions and feelings were stronger now. Every little happening was filled with consequences. Maybe that's why she was so happy, because she had seen such sadness. Somehow that sadness worked as a way to make the taste of joy all the more sweet.

'Look at you!' Elsie finally said as she rounded Anna to stand in front of her. 'You are the picture.'

'Thank you,' Anna smiled, shrugging her shoulders shyly. 'Thanks to you.'

'Nonsense. You were born with the looks, even the midwife said it when she held you for the first time.' Elsie's voice became slow. 'You take after your father.'

Before she could think twice, she felt Anna's arms around her. And for a moment she froze, until her own hands held her daughter tight against her chest, letting herself breathe in before they pulled apart.

'I am so glad you are here, Elsie. I didn't know how much I needed you here until today.' Anna said teary.

The mother smiled happily, running her hands up and down her daughter's shoulders. 'And I am so glad you feel that way. And so glad I brought this dress with me. Now...' she took a deep breath. 'Before we go, is there anything you need to ask, anything that you want to know?'

Anna understood the meaning behind Elsie's words and shook her head. Her smile nervous.

'Well, don't you worry my child, I am sure John will be a gentle husband to you. But if there's anything-'

'No. He'll teach me everything I'll need to know.'

'Oh goodness me, alright.' Elsie lifted her brow almost shocked with Anna's forwardness. 'I see that you already know your own mind about such things.'

'I do.'

The older woman shook her head and they both left the room. The children were waiting for the women in the front room with a big bouquet of fresh daisies and Anna had to smile at their gesture, kissing the top of their heads. John was waiting for them at the registrar's office. In one hour they would be married.

XXXXXX

He adjusted his jacket and tie nervously. Anna should be coming soon. For the millionth time he smelled his suit. The suit his father had wed in had been stored in an old drawer for over forty years now. It was in good shape; John always made sure it wasn't damaged, but he was afraid now that it smelled of damp. Apart from that it was still a nice suit. A bit tight, truth to be told, as John was a bigger man than his father had been, but it would have to do. He couldn't get married in his normal worn out clothes. Not when Anna would be looking like the most beautiful bride to ever walk the earth.

He touched his face. He had bought a new blade two days ago. His old one was well...old, and it did its job poorly and he needed a proper clean face for the most important day of his life. He nodded. Indeed a fine blade was a great thing to have, his face was impeccable.

A newly married couple walked by him, and he couldn't wait for that look of joy they had to be written all over his face. He turned around and he stopped breathing. For there was Anna, and she couldn't be more beautiful that she was now. His heart raced and he began to sweat. They smiled at each other and he felt tears welling in his eyes. Indeed, this was the best day of his life. For a moment it almost looked like she had come from her great house. Her hair neatly done, a dress she would wear during tea time and an elegance about her she would never lose. She wrapped her arm around his and looked deep into his eyes, and he could feel himself fall in love with her all over again.

And this was the beginning of the rest of their lives.

* * *

_**Next Chapter:** Wedding night! And day. _

**_In Bold: _**_Shakespeare Sonnet 116._

**_Thank you for reading :)_**


	13. Chapter 13

_**A/N:** This chapter promises to be a racy one (or so I hope xD). Anna and John wedding night. I hope you all enjoy it :) Thank you for your reviews, faves and follows! Wish you all a great weekend._

_**Disclaimer:** Same as chapter 1-12._

* * *

His eyes never looked away from his bride as he professed his vows of eternal respect and dedication. He took Anna Smith's hand in his and a moment later she was his wife. The smile that graced her face made him ache for a future that was just about to begin.

The love that shined in her deep blue eyes was mixed with unshed tears of joy, and he made a promise to himself that no one would ever take that feeling away from her. She had such a kind, loving soul. He would make her happy. He would see that she was loved and well cared for.

When they entered the room where their wedding was to take place, Elsie and the children sat on the chairs, together with one more witness. A man and a woman were needed. Children were mere happy spectators.

Anna's legs had been shaky as she walked to the registrar's office, but now they were sure and steady, contrasting with her erratic heartbeat. She glanced around, thinking surely someone must hear it, but only John knew how wildly it was racing. His own was just the same, echoing against his ribcage and giving him a delicious sort of pain. She flexed her jaw and swallowed in preparation. He cleared his throat and rubbed his hands against his jacket. They were terribly sweaty. The ring he had given her swung from around her neck on it's chain, underneath her dress, and every time she felt it graze her skin a sense of peace and security invaded her.

Her gaze was locked on his and she let herself drink him in. She had seen that suit the night before, he had told her about it. It was a simple brown, with a vest and high waisted trousers, like the ones her father used to wear when he spent the afternoon in the garden when she was no more than a child.

Now, she admired John, the man, and what a fine figure of a man. He seemed taller dressed as he was, and he could easily pass as a gentleman, if he had left that cap he was wearing outside at home. She smiled and took one small flower from her bouquet, hooking its stem into his chest pocket. What a handsome husband she would have. What a beautiful man she would share a bed with. Tonight.

The ceremony was quick and half an hour later they were outside, enjoying the cold sunny day again.

'Wed on a cold sunny day, be blessed for life.' Elsie remarked as John and Anna walked arm in arm; married, smiling, and eager for the night to come.

'What's that?' William asked.

'An old saying,' the former maid replied, smiling down at the boy. 'Marrying in a cold month and catching a sunny day is good luck. And see, it's been raining for weeks and today the sun is shining.'

'The sun is celebrating with us, I reckon,' the boy suggested, trying to sound as wise as Elsie. 'But we're going to spend the night at Mrs Oliver's. Not that I mind, but I would rather sleep on my top bunk,' he pursed his lips.

'You will sleep in that bunk bed until you get tired of it, don't worry,' John told him as he squeezed Anna's hand, smiling at her.

'Still don't know why we have to sleep there.' William muttered and the adults chuckled at his childish innocence. 'Still don't know why...'

At home, they had lunch. Elsie had been invited. She had helped Anna with the meal and the two had made a thick chicken stew. There was also fresh bread and a big piece of ham, and apples. Before starting to eat Anna asked everyone to pray for the loved ones who were gone and the ones who were still here, and to give thanks for their food. Even John managed to pray in his way, thanking whoever was in charge for his blessings, his house, the children and his wife. For Elsie too, _may she stay with us for many long years._

Today, there would be no washing and John wouldn't work until Monday. William was not job free though and he would have to work tomorrow morning, but Elsie had offered to take him downtown so John wouldn't have to wake up so early. '_You should make the most of your nuptials,'_ she had told him. _'I'll take the boy. You stay in bed with your wife. God knows late mornings are a luxury for our kind.'_

After lunch Elsie helped with the dishes but soon she left, leaving them alone as the children played outside.

'I'm going now,' she said. 'I'll leave you two in peace.' She walked towards Anna and placed a hand on her shoulder. 'You be very happy my child. May your first night as a wife be the beginning of all your joys.'

Anna nodded, a sweet smile playing on her lips, and accompanied her to the door. Before she left, Elsie looked back one more time and took Anna's hand, turning her palm up. She traced her daughter's lines without looking at them. 'Will you grant me one wish? I promise I won't ask anything else from you.'

'Yes,' Anna smiled.

'Let me hold your children in my arms and call them my children as well.'

'My children will be raised knowing who you are, Elsie.'

Elsie grinned tearily before looking down at her daughter's hand. Indeed they would. She saw it now.

John was by the blackened stove, moving its glowing cinders, when he looked back and Anna was gone. He furrowed his brow and looked around the room before seeing the bedroom door opened. He walked towards it.

'Anna?' he entered the room and she was seated on bed, holding her old doll in her hands. She had a melancholy smile on her face. 'Are you alright, love?'

'Oh yes,' she wiped a tear from her cheek. 'I am more than alright,' she smiled up at him.

'What is it then?' he sat down besides her. Their legs touching, he brought one arm around her middle. 'Your old doll?'

'I was thinking in giving it to Elsa. I don't really need a doll anymore...I have a husband now.' She chuckled to herself and he joined her.

'Indeed you do.' John kissed her temple lovingly.

'Elsie gave it to me when I was a baby. It's been my favourite doll since I can remember. I had so many dolls. A roomful. Of every colour and kind. Long hair, short hair, lots of dresses to change them into, but this one...this one has always been my favourite. Mrs Smith always said I was silly because all the other dolls were prettier and expensive.'

'Why don't you save it then?' he suggested.

'Dolls are meant to be played with, not saved. I even thought about...giving it to...my daughter,' she smiled shyly. 'But no. I will give it to Elsa. I want her to have it. She's like a daughter to me after all.'

'That's very kind of you, she'll love it.' He traced the doll's rough face. Many years of used had worn it out but he was sure his niece would be so happy to have it. After all, the girl have never owned a doll.

Anna placed her old companion on her nightstand before turning to face him, her eyes now playing with his own. She giggled.

'What?' he smiled back at her, tightening his grip around her waist.

'I still can't believe I am your wife.'

'Oh, but you better believe it, Mrs Bates,' he teased her, nuzzling his face in the crook of her neck. 'Believe it.' His voice was barely audible against her skin. The hairs on her body standing in excitement, reacting to the seductive volume of his voice. The sound of her married name sending electric jolts down her spine. His other hand cupped her cheek and his lips began to nibble at her earlobe, moving along her collarbone, until he heard her sighing contentedly, and proceeded with his ministrations, now capturing her lips in a slow kiss.

'Pa? Pa! Susan's just had another baby!' His son entered the room abruptly and Anna and John broke apart, wide eyed and panting heavily. She had rose from bed and her face had turned red, a hand on her mouth.

'This is why you have to sleep at Mrs Oliver tonight,' John sighed. 'And you have to knock before entering this room from now on, do you understand?'

William frowned. 'Whatever for?'

'Just do as I said without fuss, alright?'

'Yes, Pa, but the door was opened.' The other children came now and looked from Anna to John in confusion.

'Alright, but you knock from now on. Understand?' The boy nodded at his father. 'What were you saying now?'

'Susan had another baby,' the boy repeated.

'I told William that was no news,' Elsa said.

'Of course it's news.' William rolled his eyes. 'It's another boy! That's news!'

'I'm afraid Elsa's right, lad. Susan having another baby is not news.' John looked at Anna who remained in silence, trying to mask her flushed cheeks. 'She's got seven already. Eight with this one.'

'That's why it's news, pa! She only has boys! Don't you understand? At the eighth boy, when full moon comes, a curse will fall upon thy house. Hair will grow and claws will show and a werewolf will be at loose, waiting...' the boy whispered now, adding suspense to the telling. '...at every corner and dark alley for an innocent to come, and he'll eat them in a bite, and no one shall ever be safe again!'

His cousins screamed as he voiced his own werewolf kind of noises, growling and howling, lunging towards them.

'That's enough of that, William. Go play outside,' his father commanded and the boy ran after his cousins scaring them away. 'And don't you scare your cousins!' John shook his head with a smile. 'That boy will be in big trouble one day.'

'He has a fertile imagination. I like it. He's a wonderful boy.' Anna sighed walking towards him and taking hold of one of his hands, pulling him out off bed. 'Let's go. Let's go outside and enjoy this sunny day. We won't have another one soon, I'm sure.'

'I would rather stay here and enjoy you,' he pulled her to him and she fell on his lap.

'Mr Bates, what has got into you?' she asked, pleased.

'Mr Bates?' he laughed and she bit her lower lip. 'The fact that you are my lawful wife has gotten into me. There's no need for us to hold down our...feelings any longer.' _Desire, need_. Anna rose from his lap and pulled him again. This time he followed her.

'We will have the night for that. Just the two of us. No children calling after you.'

If only night would come sooner. He loved the children, of course he did, but he was glad they would be away tonight. Tonight was his, only his and Anna's. No one else's. He would be selfish just this once and he would not regret it for one moment.

XXXXXX

John entered the room and she was looking at herself in the mirror, retouching her loose locks for the fifth time in the past few minutes. There were three small candles burning, making their bed look almost like a golden nest, contrasting with the secondhand crimson bed curtains that Anna had bought at the market. She smiled at him shyly. It certainly wasn't the first time she saw him in his nightclothes but tonight everything was different.

'No braid tonight?' he asked, trying to make small talk.

'I thought I would leave it like this. Do you want me to braid it?'

'No.' He sat down beside her. 'I rather like your hair this way.' He touched it gently, watching as the strands fell between his fingers. 'Anna...are you nervous?'

She shook her head. 'Maybe...' she smiled then. 'I've heard so many horror stories about it. I know...' she stopped him from talking. 'I know you will be careful and I also know that most of those tales are only exaggeration.'

'You know what happens, don't you?' he traced her cheek with his finger.

'Well...I was told some things, I read others...I think I do, more or less.' John nodded. 'I'm ready for the pain and for the blood,' she told him. 'I just want to be your wife.'

'I will be as gentle as I can, I promise you.' He kissed her forehead. 'All I want is to show you how much I love you.'

'I know,' she whispered, and John stood, bringing one of the candles to her nightstand.

'I want to be able to see you properly.' He offered her his hand and she accepted it, standing up, and he pulled her to him, admiring her. Now he did it without any trepidation. He felt free and somewhat overwhelmed.

'I'm afraid I don't have a proper nightdress for such occasion, I should have saved one,' she looked down at her feet.

'The proper nightdress for such an occasion is no nightdress at all,' he chuckled and she giggled shyly. 'Come here.' He hugged her close and kissed her lips. Slowly at first. She melted into him. But in all her inexperience, she was as eager as he was, and she wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him to her.

John smiled into her lips. That was the cue he needed to go further. He did as she demanded, sliding the tip of his tongue along her lips, and she opened her mouth to him. His hands began to roam her body, discovering every curve and sensitive spot, feeling the heat of her skin coming from beneath the fabric, and he sighed at the thought that soon she would be free from her nightdress and her naked skin would be pressed against his own.

She moaned when he grazed at the sides of her breasts and his lips made their way down her neck to her collarbone. The desire was beginning to pulse against his bottoms and John knew that soon she would feel it herself, so he pulled away just enough to take his nightdress off.

When he did, and his bare chest came into contact with the chilly air, her eyes wandered along the dark broadness of his hairy body, admiring the sight of this so manly figure before her. She smiled and bit her bottom lip, her eyes travelling lower then, and she saw the state of his need for her. She tried to look away for a moment but her curious self couldn't do it for long. It was growing before her eyes and she saw it move beneath the fabric when he touched her cheek, taking a loose strand of golden hair out off her face.

'I love you, Anna,' he whispered and she came closer to him, letting herself fall into his embrace once again, his desire now felt against her stomach.

Slowly, his hands came to her neck and he back away again, looking deep in her eyes as his palms travelled down her chest, and he stopped just right at the hem of her neckline, touching her pale skin before daring to touch the ribbons that held her nightdress together. He pulled at them then, undoing the tie and watching as the fabric began to loosen around her breasts. They both took a deep breath and the dress fell to her feet.

John looked down at her naked body in surprise. He thought she would be wearing bloomers and he smiled when he saw nothing but bare skin and the chain with his ring, swinging between her breasts.

'I thought I didn't need my bloomers for tonight.' She bit her lip with a cheeky smile on her face and he couldn't help but place his hands on her hips and telling her that indeed, she wouldn't need her bloomers, maybe not ever again, and they laughed, their playful mood making them more at ease with each other.

'You are beautiful, Anna. So beautiful.' He rubbed his thumbs against the skin of her stomach. 'Look at you.' His eyes took in every inch of her immaculate body. 'You are a goddess, my love.' He looked into her eyes then and caressed her hair with one hand. 'A luckier man has never lived.' The other hand came up to touch the chain. The symbol of all his promises and love.

As surprising as it was, Anna was not embarrassed or shy, or constrained. There was a nervous feeling trembling in the pit of her stomach, mixed with excitement and a longing ache, but not even for a second did she feel the urge to cover herself. Quite the opposite. She loved the way his eyes bathed her with admiration and want. The way he touched her and spoke to her, ever so slow and passionate. All she wanted was to be like this with him forever, undressed of clothes and fears, in his arms, protected and loved. So she placed her own hands on his chest, rubbing them against the thick dark hair that covered his torso and in a bold motion she traced the path that disappeared into his bottoms. That's where her hands stopped, right at the waistline of the last piece of clothing that he was wearing, and she smiled up at him. The bulge was showing there, begging to be set free, and obeying to his body's demands, as well as his wife's, John proceeded to get himself as naked as he could be, with Anna's help.

Her eyes grew wide now, looking down at him. His hardness was standing at attention in her direction. For a moment she was scared. And curious. And she couldn't wait for him to take her fully. She caressed the skin of his stomach again and saw with hungry eyes how his manhood pulsed with every movement she made. As bold as she could be, one of her hands continued its journey down his body, but before she could touch him she froze. A sudden shyness over-taking her. What would he think of her? Was she being too wanton?

No at all. Would have been his answer if she had voiced her fears. And to prove her that, he guided her hesitating hand to where he most needed her, reading her mind and knowing how much she wanted to be able to touch him in the most private of ways.

Feeling braver now, she took hold of his length and he moaned in delicious reciprocation when she began to stroke him.

Anna bit her lower lip as she did so, relishing in the feeling of how soft he felt in her hand, and how hard he was becoming with every second. She may have imagined this moment many times but she had been wrong in all of them. His hot heaviness was perfect against her skin, and the lower part of her body tightened at the sight of his large member gripped by her small fingers, barely capable of holding it in place.

'Oh Anna...that feels so good.' Now that made her proud of herself, as he closed his eyes to enjoy her ministrations. 'I need...'

'Take me, John,' she said at last, unable to control her own emotions anymore. Her body was begging for him. For that piece of him that she now held in her hands. If she were more experienced she would be the one taking him instead, but not tonight. Tonight she wanted to be shown.

'I'll be gentle,' John said one more time, before wrapping his arms around her and laying on the bed. 'Don't be afraid.' He caressed her cheek and kissed her lips in a passionate kiss.

Once over her, he slid his right hand along her body, lazily, paying attention to the expressions she portrayed, as he kissed every inch of her face.

The contrast between her fragile frame and his strong body made her shiver. Feeling his heavy weight pinning her down into the mattress, his legs working to spread hers apart, and how his belly fit so well against her own. Oh God. If she happened to die now, she would die the happiest of women.

He touched her then, down in her centre, in the place she needed to be touched the most. The place that always ached so much for him, and that used to make her feel embarrassed even to herself. Not anymore. Now she knew why and how wonderful it truly felt to be a woman. All the dreams she had ever had would never come close to matching this. She didn't question him, neither did she feel shy when he looked at her while parting her folds with his fingers. No. Instead she kissed him fiercely. Her hands around his neck, caressing his hair and back, and he answered back with the same intensity, massaging her as she began to move her hips against him. She was ready for him now.

'Sushhh...' John whispered, touching her face gently as he joined them together. Her eyes were closed and she dug her nails in his back. 'It's alright, love.' He kissed her cheek and then her lips before moving into her.

There was some pain, but she had been ready for it. With every movement he made she felt the blood sliding between their bodies and for the first moments of their lovemaking she had to clench her jaw not to cry out. He had been gentle but he was a big man, and she saw how worried he was when she gasped, and how he had stilled all his movements, but she knew it was only natural that he was eager to feel as good as he had made her feel. She also knew that with time all pain would vanish and only pleasure would remain.

His breathing was erratic in her ear and he kissed the skin he found there. 'Anna...you feel so good,' he whispered as his hand came to her centre once again, moving in rhythm to his thrusts, and the pain she felt at the beginning started to subside into an uncomfortable fullness until she let out moans of satisfaction. She could feel him all over her. His smell, his taste, the wetness between their bodies and the sweat on his brow. She begged him for more.

'John!' she cried out in ecstasy. She was coming undone, teetering on the edge of that precipice and it was so good. It was like nothing she'd ever imagined. Then he spreaded her legs even further, opening her to him as he took her harder and deeper now, his end coming soon. Too soon. For she would have him worshiping her body this way for the rest of their lives.

Anna shifted in the bed now, feeling the soreness between her legs. She smiled and bit her lower lip as John stood from bed, in all his naked glory and walking shamelessly to the water vase. _Oh goodness_. She closed her eyes only to open them wide in the next second. The sight of her husband making her shiver all over. How could a naked man be appealing to the eyes? That's certainly something she was never told.

Before she could shake her head off such thoughts he was right beside her again, with a damp cloth in his hand.

'Let me clean you,' his voice was gentle and he had a pleased smile on his lips.

For a moment Anna wasn't sure what to do, but her husband's hands were quick to sooth her of any hesitation as he placed the wet cloth on her thighs, and she let herself enjoy this more innocent gesture of his.

Carefully and slowly, he cleaned her, his dedication showing in the tender way of how his hands moved. Was he trying to remove all trace of blood and their lovemaking or was this a new way of teasing her into pleasure again?

Her legs trembled as she saw his movements and he smiled at her. 'Am I hurting you?' he asked but he knew that was far from it.

'It just feels too good,' she fluttered her lashes at him.

Oh yes, too good for her and himself. He thought as he finished this pleasing task, dragging one hand along her body, caressing the skin in her stomach and kissing near her belly button.

It was now his turn and Anna stilled his movements, taking the wet and stained cloth from his hand. 'Let me clean you.' So he sat back, resting his head against the headboard of the bed and relaxing his body.

At first she had been shy but soon she grew more comfortable with the task before her, his own hands guiding her now and then, making her feel more at ease.

'How are you feeling?' he asked, sighing.

'Utterly complete. Whole. I am now who I was meant to be,' she told him, looking up at his eyes and smiling shyly at him, resting the cloth on the floor. 'You've made me very happy.'

'As you've made me, my love,' he pulled her to him and kissed her. 'Did...did you like it? Did I hurt you?'

'Like is an understatement,' she rolled her eyes and he chuckled, her head coming to rest against his chest as she laid down besides him. 'And it didn't hurt as bad as I was told.'

He nodded. 'Because I want you to feel as good as I do.'

'You can't even imagine how wonderful I feel. There are no words.'

'That's what I want. To leave you speechless,' he smiled caressing her cheek. 'It was so good Anna. My dreams were never so wild or pleasing as this moment we just shared.'

'I could spend the rest of my life like this.' Her hand played with the hairs of his chest.

'And we shall, at least every night,' he smiled. 'And tonight we will make the most of it. We are alone in this house, we can't waste that.'

She gave him a racy smile. 'What are you suggesting, Mr Bates?'

'That we've been waiting for this moment for so long, we should spend the night getting used to each other. Wouldn't you like that?'

'I've heard that practice leads to perfection,' she kissed his shoulder.

'I don't think we can love each other more perfectly than we already do, but it's worth a try.'

The candlelight was long extinct, and outside the early colours of dawn replaced the darkness of the night. The day was beginning cloudy and cold, and the birds didn't sing, but Anna felt like she awoke to a summer morn. Maybe it was the warm body of her husband against her own, or his lips, placing open mouth kisses along her back, or even the remaining heat from all their exertions that was still ingrained inside her. Whatever it was it spread a lazy smile on her face and the sound of his voice was the next thing she heard.

'Did I interrupt your dreams?' he asked between kisses and caresses.

'Only to wake me up for a better one,' she said, turning around so she was facing him. Her hands came to cup his face as he hovered in one elbow over her, taking in the figure of his sleepy wife. The smile that graced her features had an hint of mischief and he licked his lips.

'You are even more beautiful this morning.' He leaned into her, capturing her lips in a quick kiss. She chuckled.

'And you are ever so handsome,' she told him.

He shook his head. 'How are you feeling this morning?'

'So lazy.' She stretched under him and yawned.

'I wonder why...' he rested his head on his hand, smiling.

Anna rolled her eyes, feeling absolutely overjoyed with the easiness of their relationship now. Their night had been spent discovering each other. Kissing, touching, making love. There had been little talk but many laughs. She had found a new side to John she never knew existed, that she had only seen glimpses of, not knowing that there was so much more to come. Before, when she thought about these nights they would share, she wondered if he would be as passionate as she felt. If the intensity of his feelings were equal to hers, and last night she had witnessed how fierce and urgently he desired her. She sighed now, thinking about all those wonderful memories. Being wanted, needed, by the man she most loved...was indeed the best thing in the world.

'What?' he asked, caressing her stomach through the sheets.

'I was thinking about us. Of what we did.' She smiled shyly.

'And there are so many more things I want to do with you.' His hand dove under the sheets to grasp at her breasts. She gasped. His fingers were cold, his touches were wonderful, and she felt herself responding to him again.

XXXXXX

John sat at the table with a mug of tea in his hand, watching as Anna poured some for herself. He smiled admiring her as she moved, knowing now exactly how she felt in his arms, how beautiful she truly was...knowing that her curious hands had been just as eager to explore his body as he was hers. He sighed, biting his lip. The feeling of her traveling through him as if he was still moving inside of her. A feeling he hoped would never leave.

'I asked Elsie to teach me how to sew,' she said and that shook him from his thoughts.

'I thought girls were taught how to.'

'No. Ladies are taught how to embroider, not sew. I know how to stitch initials in pillowcases not how to mend a dress.'

'I see...and I'm sure you'll need to know how to mend lots of socks and holes in trousers. Specially with those children running around like wild horses.'

'Exactly,' she smiled.

'I am happy to see you both getting along. You deserve it, after everything...I just wish that you didn't have to turn your back on your father because of me,' he sighed, taking a sip.

'I would like nothing better than to be at peace with the man I love and with my father,' she sat down next to him. 'but I couldn't, so I made a choice.'

'I just hope you don't live to regret it,' he sighed, taking her hands in his.

'If only you would stop with that nonsense,' she rolled her eyes. 'Am I that weak?'

'Not that all!' He brought one hand to her face, caressing her cheek gently. 'You are the strongest woman I've ever known. Look at where you are now? How could I ever doubt you?'

'Stop it then. And for good before I give you a smack.'

'Alright, Mrs Bates. I'll stop talking now.' He stood and pulled her with him.

'Where are we going?' she giggled knowing exactly where he was leading them.

'No talking, Mrs Bates.'

They entered the bedroom and he picked her up and gently tossed her on bed.

'I don't know why I dressed myself,' she said shutting her eyes as he travelled down her body, unbuttoning her dress and kissing her naked breasts. The delightful smile on her face matched the eagerness of her hands, pulling at his hair as he took one of her nipples in his mouth.

'I could never imagine such thing would feel so good!' she bit her lower lip.

'This is only the beginning of a life of discoveries together, my love.' He faced her again and kissed her lips, their tongues dancing in unison. 'I will never grow tired of your taste.'

Anna giggled at him as she felt his hand travelling down her body. Soon after they would be moving together again, moaning each other's names and crying out in undying pleasure. Their first day as lovers was far from being over.

Passion has a way of embellishing everything around oneself, even if everything is nothing at all. Now, they were laying in each other's arms, smiling, breathing, in love, and this old room was a paradise. It was dark and small but their little world fit perfectly inside of it, and for those moments that would be all that mattered. In the aftermath of their exertions, when sweaty bodies and heavy breathing regained its normal heartbeat once more, they would pretend that nothing else existed but themselves. Even if only for this one day.

'This room will be our nest, forever,' was the last he said before falling into a peaceful sleep.

But how wrong he was. It would be their nest, yes, but not forever... only in the meantime.

* * *

_**Next Chapter:** Anna and John continue to enjoy their first days as husband and wife, but rumours about Elsie's past begin when a woman with a poisoned tongue spreads them through the children. Meanwhile the death of an old friend of John's father will bring Elsie even closer to Anna._

**Thank you for reading :)**


	14. Chapter 14

_**A/N: **Look at me posting every week! Let's see if I can do this until the end of this fic. I can tell you all now that this story will have more than 20 chapters. Not much more though, I don't want to make it too long. I hope you enjoy this one :) Wish you all a great weekend! _

**_Disclaimer: _**_Same as chapter 1-3._

* * *

There was a loud knock on the door to their room. Anna and John were resting from their _last activities_. Their bodies still warm but the rhythm of their breathing and heartbeat had come back to normal; his face resting on top of her chest while she breathed in the scent of his sweaty hair.

'I am knocking!' William's voice made itself known. 'Just as you asked!' the boy shouted.

'Oh goodness,' John sighed with a chuckled as he sat up, untangling his arm from around her body, and Anna brought the sheets up to her neck.

'Don't let him come in yet,' she told him as he grabbed his nightclothes from the floor, putting them back on.

'Don't worry,' he smiled at her, standing to put his bottoms on and she watched as he turned his back to her; a radiant smile blossoming on her face as she bit her lower lip, taking in her husband's backside. 'I'm sure he's just...' John turned around and caught her staring. He grinned pleased and leaned toward her in bed. 'You naughty girl,' he whispered kissing her forehead. 'I'm sure he's just hungry.'

'I'll be ready in a minute.'

'No rush. I can fix him something.' He smiled one more time before leaving the room.

'Where's Anna?' William tried to peek through the door, managing to have a glimpse of her in bed, covered with the sheets. 'Hello Anna!' the boy waved before his father closed the door, and a moment after he faced him with a serious look. 'Are you ill, pa? Both of you?'

'Of course we aren't, son. ' John patted his son's head.

'Why are you wearing your nightclothes. And why is Anna in bed at this time of the day? I know the day is dark and all but it's barely six.'

John shook his head smiling. 'When people get married they stay in bed longer their first day. It's tradition. And I thought you were to stay at Mrs. Oliver's until I came to get you.'

The boy just shrugged his shoulders. 'If it's tradition then you must do it.' William nodded lifting his brow. 'Bad luck not to.'

'Exactly.' John chuckled. 'Are you hungry?'

'Yes, I could eat a cow and its young ones!'

'I'm afraid cheese and a slice of bread will have to do, lad.'

'Better that than nothing. But...' William pursed his lips.

'But what?'

'It's just...when Anna does it it tastes better, I tell you.'

'Oh it does? Maybe she has some kind of magic spell over the cheese.' John laughed. _Oh god, how wonderful was to feel this happy and light. So in love._

'I reckon it's because her hands don't know she's not a lady anymore. Or maybe she's a witch. Just like her ma.'

'What are you talking about now?' John stopped his cheese slicing and looked pointedly at his son.

'Elsie Hughes herself. Knows the future and all, reads handlines and did some voodoo...' the boy traced an invisible picture on the tabletop with his finger. 'Back in the day.'

'William Bates, you shall never say that again, do you hear me?!' John scolded the boy. 'I'll pull your ear off if you do.'

The boy cringed. 'But Maggie...'

'Maggie?! Of course. Listen here, lad, if you want no trouble,' John held William's shoulders between his hands. 'You won't repeat what you said about Elsie ever again to anyone, not even to yourself. And you won't listen what Maggie has to say. When she speaks you walk past her as if you are deaf. I don't want you near that woman! Do you understand?'

'I'm sorry, pa.' the boy pouted and John sighed, feeling badly for the harsh way he had spoken to his son, but sometimes children only listen in fear. He caressed William's shoulders then and pinched his cheek lightly.

'Son...what you said, voodoo, that's bad stuff. Stuff that could cause trouble for all of us, do you understand?'

'Yes, pa.' the boy nodded.

'And Elsie never did such thing. That's a pack of lies from big mouthed Maggie. And your mouth is just as big...you will put someone in trouble one day.' John rose and placed the cheese on the bread. 'Take it and go fetch your cousins. Go.' The boy left running, eating a piece of his bread.

'Is that true?' Anna's voice made him jump and he turned around to face her. 'Elsie did voodoo or witchcraft, or whatever that's called?'

'No, love.' John approached her, resting his hands on her hips. 'Maggie,' he sighed, ' you don't know her, and I don't want you to, but she feeds on gossip and lies. And worst of all she lures the children to…well, bad things. That's why she tells them these stories.'

'Bad things? What bad things?' she frowned.

John took a deep breath. 'She's...she's a prostitute, and she gets the children to steal for her and and such.'

'I don't think I've ever seen her.' Anna looked at him intrigued.

'You probably have but it's good she's never bothered you. I don't want you near her. She's trouble.'

She shook her head. 'I've never seen a prostitute...I've only read about...and I shouldn't have.'

John gave her a small smile, almost fearing to spoil her innocent soul. 'Yes, you have. You just didn't know they were what they are. Those who linger in the shadows, dirty, some with crying children by their side...' he furrowed his brow. 'They are fallen women too.'

Anna widen her eyes in shock. 'I've spoken to them?'

'Anna...they are people, just like you and me. Women that have fallen for many reasons, and they have little ones to feed. They have no other option. Some...some even have husbands who send them out for money, there's nothing they can do.'

'But...they...'

'Anna, listen. This is reality. Those women were always there, even when you were hidden in your castle. They won't bite you.' He smiled tenderly. 'But Maggie...Maggie bites. She bites and kills with her poison tongue.'

She thought for a moment, trying to understand this world she was living in now. _And here was I thinking I knew everything about these people. I know nothing at all...there's so much more to learn…._'How can you sleep knowing that those women are out there doing what they do?' she spoke at last, his hands still strong on her hips.

'Anna, here, we sleep well knowing that our wives, our children are safe, fed, with a roof over their heads. Here we make the most to keep away from that life, that's even more miserable than ours...that's what we do. We share blessings, we help our neighbours and we sleep. That's what we do.'

She nodded, her eyes unsure. Maybe... 'Is Thelma a prostitute?' Thelma, a woman that always walked in the shadows with her two babes holding her hand, but that always greeted Anna with a smile on her face. She liked Thelma, they talked sometimes when Anna was hanging clothes at the back of the building they lived in.

'Yes, she is.' John sighed and Anna nodded again.

'Alright.' Anna said decisively. 'I should get started with dinner before the children arrive.'

'You do that and I'll see where they've wandered...William is taking too long.' John kissed her forehead and went to the bedroom to change to his day clothes.

Some stew from yesterday would be warmed up for dinner and bread and oranges would have to be enough for tonight.

XXXXXX

The children were all together in the bottom bunk bed, their eyes starving for the story that John was telling them. There was a fierce dragon and a knight on a white horse, ready to save the princess from her prison in the castle tower.

'Why aren't the knights wizards as well? It would be so much easier to kill the dragon.' William commented.

'Because wizards and witches are bad, they would never save a princess.' Elsa replied, rather annoyed.

'Well...not if the wizard was also a knight.' William answered back, rolling his eyes.

'Susssh.' George demanded and John continued his add animated storytelling with a broad smile on his face.

A few paragraphs more, and 'The end!' John said.

'One more! Please uncle.' Elsa begged.

'Isn't it too late for one more story, little lady?' John caressed the girls curls. Elsa's hair was just like his when he was a little boy. Dark and wavy, wild and shining, but only after Anna had brushed it delicately with all the patience in the world.

'Well...' It was Anna's time for begging for a story now. 'Just one more? I didn't really catch the first one,' she smiled at him, her hair still damp from washing.

'Alright then, if the ladies want one more story, that's what they'll get,' John said and Anna sat on his lap.

'The gentlemen want another one too!' William remarked wrapping an arm around his cousin.

'Alright, alright.' John cleared his throat. 'Ladies...and gentlemen, what about a story about fairies?'

'Oh I'm sure we'll love that one!' Anna giggled as his hand pinched her teasing at her back.

'So...once upon a time...'

XXXXXX

'If I had any doubt it has now vanished away,' Anna said as she slipped under the covers.

'About what?' Her husband was washing his face from the water pitcher and bowl in the corner of their room.

'That William's gift for storytelling comes from you,' she smiled.

'Well...it's a different sort of storytelling, I reckon. I tell stories for children to fall asleep, now William, he tells tales that can keep you up all night.'

'Different tales, same talent…your face is all wet!' she squealed when John nuzzled his still damp face in the crook of her neck. 'Mr Bates!'

'I thought you said you loved me no matter what,' he teased her, kissing her earlobe.

'You silly beggar.'

John chuckled leaning against the headboard and running a hand through his hair. 'You know...it has been almost an year since I last slept in a proper bed. I had forgotten how good it feels...mostly for your back. Same for you?' he looked over at her and she was sitting up, with a delicious smile on her lips.

'I haven't slept properly since yesterday so I don't know,' she giggled, straddling him.

'What are you doing?' he asked grinning, immediately grazing at her sides. A question he knew too well the answer for. 'You temptress,' he whispered. _How can a dream this perfect be reality?_

'I'm afraid you have left me insatiable, Mr Bates. After everything we shared...I just want more of you,' she told him, leaning down and wrapping her arms around his neck, pulling him to her lips.

'Maybe that was my plan all along,' he confessed when they broke apart. His desire growing against her. 'To make an addiction of myself. Something that you would crave more than breathing.' His hand playing with her loose hair.

'Your plan worked. I just hope that mine works as well.'

'And what's your plan?' John felt her rubbing against his hardness and he sighed almost painfully as his hand worked her nightdress out of the way, pulling at the hems until the fabric was gathered around her middle.

'For us to live a lifetime together as fiercely as we are now.'

'I wouldn't worry about that, my love. If anything I will love you even more.'

She smiled. 'All I want is to be your last.'

'My last?'

'The last woman you have in your life.'

He looked at her tenderly. 'My darling. You already are my last, and you were my first. The first woman I have ever loved. I could never have imagined that I would love so immensely, not even when I fell for you. When I first saw you I could never have imagined...that a time like this would come.' He could feel the warmth between their bodies now, and how much he craved her.

'I loved you when I first saw you. When we first met. Do you know that?' She kissed him.

'I know now. And my heart was yours then, I know it now too.'

XXXXXX

Sunday was grey again. The clouds had gathered and the rain had been pouring since early hours. John awoke to find himself adrift in the waves of Anna's golden hair. His nose pressed against the skin of her neck and her back to him. He hadn't dreamed of her that night, but why did he need such a thing now? He had her right beside him. Her smell invading his senses. The feel of her naked silken skin pressed against his. There was no better sensation on earth. Almost as wonderful as feeling her body responding to his. Or when they moved together in perfect harmony.

He stretched then, just a little. The last he wanted now was to wake her up. The air was cold and beneath the sheets their bare bodies were at a perfect temperature. He didn't want to get up. The children, though. They weren't just a couple. They had children who needed them and the time for a sleep-in with his wife had been yesterday, not today.

So he sat up, scratching his head sleepily and yawning. His wife hadn't moved. She laid there undefeated, as if her sleep was something she had been fighting for, and indeed that was the case. Neither had gotten much sleep since the night before their wedding.

Slowly, John stood from the bed. His naked skin shivering against the chilly air of the morning. _Oh God. It's freezing,_ he thought while he gathered his clothes and dressed up for the day. He washed his face and shaved his beard. 'Bloody thing. How can it grow so much overnight?' he whispered into the small mirror, trying his best not to cut himself in the candlelight with his new and sharp blade.

Before he left the room, he leaned down toward Anna and placed a tender kiss on her forehead. Her mouth was slightly opened and her body still. Her lids were moving though...she was dreaming. He smiled.

It was nearly seven o'clock, and John was quite impressed that he had managed to sleep for so long. Usually he would be up around five. Years of early work had made his body used to the light of dawn and he actually enjoyed it. Waking up before the sun and seeing its first rays hitting the rooftops. That was something quite magical to him. Something that it would often take him back to his young years, when he was no older than his son, running around the streets, shining shoes and picking cotton from the ground.

He smiled, shaking his head as he put some water in the kettle. Youth makes the hardships of life so much more simpler, even better. You may be held back in your life but as a child with a child's imagination, you are free. When do those feelings go away? Feelings of conquest and dreams of greatness? Maybe they vanish at their own pace, until one day they are completely forgotten.

'Pa?'

'William?' John turned around to face his son, who was sitting on his top bunk. 'You can sleep a bit more if you want, it's Sunday.'

'Don't want to. Had a hell of a dream, I had.' William rubbed his fists against his eyes.

'Did you now?' John smiled as the boy made his way down his bed silently, careful not to wake his cousins.

'There was this fairy but she was a bad fairy. Kept telling me to swear.' William down sat at the table. The water was boiling.

'I'm afraid that fairy follows you around when you are awake as well.' John chuckled.

The boy frowned his brow. 'Pa, I have one question and I reckon is a difficult one.

'Oh my. You ask me and I'll see if I'm wise enough to answer.'

'When do you know you are not a child no more?'

John faced his son with a surprised look. For a moment there was silence. 'Have you been wandering in on my thoughts now?'

William gave him a confused look.

'Nevermind that.' John shook his head. 'I think it's when you face your responsibilities with courage. When you can take all the consequences from your acts, no matter what they are. And when you know what kind of man you really are. The kind of man you are proud of.'

William nodded accepting his father's answer, even though for his young self, this reply was still a bit complicated to understand.

John's reply hadn't been wrong, not at all. In fact, all that he said is what makes an adult out of a child, but that was not exactly William's question in this case. Maybe the boy didn't word it correctly. For his answer would be simpler, and so much more precise. One day, William would ask this question again but he wouldn't find the answer in his father.

'Do you want a slice of bread?' John asked his son.

'And tea, please.' William said.

'Yes, sir!' They both smiled at each other.

'What's with the tray?' the boy asked, eating his crusty piece of bread.

'It's just...for Anna.' John said a bit sheepishly. 'Remember when you told me that I have to treat my wife kindly?'

'I do remember that, yes. I think she would enjoy some flowers as well.'

John looked at his son as the boy's wise words struck him. Flowers yes! Anna would like flowers… He looked around for a moment, thinking. 'You stay as silent as a mouse, William. Don't wake up anyone, alright?'

'That's fine, I'll be here chewing my bread.'

'You do that lad.' John held the boy's face between his hands and kissed the top of his head. 'Good boy.' With that he was out of the door in search for whatever flowers he could find.

XXXXXX

Anna yawned beneath the covers as John rested the tray in the edge of the bed.

'What's this?' she asked, smiling widely at the sight before her.

'Just...a little something I prepared.' He stood watching her reaction. The old tray had two big slices of bread, two pieces of cheese and a mug with tea, and of course, a small glass with five little daisies. He frowned at the flowers. 'I couldn't find better ones...the heavy rain ruined most of them.'

'And is that why you are all wet?' Anna looked at him from head to toe. He wasn't drenched but she could see that he had caught enough rain to make him sick.

'It started raining all of a sudden. It wasn't when I left the house. It was worth it though, just to see that beautiful smile in your face.'

'John, you didn't have to. The last thing we need now is for you to get ill,' she told him as he sat down next to her.

'I've caught enough rain and cold in my life. It won't be that that will kill me.' He moved a golden strand of hair away from her face.

'I love it. And the flowers are beautiful! For everything that they mean.' She couldn't help but place a quick kiss on his lips. 'I am starving!'

John admired her as she ate. Devouring the two pieces of bread in a minute. She asked him to eat with her but he told her he had already eaten, that all he wanted now was to watch her as she did so. She smiled at him as his eyes burned into her and she nearly choke when she took a sip from her tea.

'Are you alright?' he tapped her back.

'If you would stop staring so hard...' she coughed, her usual smile playing in her features.

'Can't a husband admire his wife anymore?!' He teased her, placing a kiss on her hair when she regained her normal breathing once again. 'I've learn something that has made me think... when I was out after the flowers,' he said a moment later.

'What was that?' Anna asked as she tried another sip at her tea.

'Mr Lewis died last night.' Mr Lewis, an old man who lived right next to them.

'Oh my! That is a shame...'

'It is a shame yes...leaves no one in the world to cry for him,' John sighed.

'Didn't he have anyone?'

'Not a soul. He preferred to pay for...' John stopped himself from saying it in the crude way of things. 'for the comforts of women rather than settle down and have a family.'

'Oh, I see.'

'He had a good life for a man of his kind.' He lifted his brow, a grin on his face. 'The ones who will cry for him are the women he used without paying. They will be angry...' He stopped himself again when he saw Anna's confused eyes looking at him. 'He was not a man who was good with his money.'

'I never seen much of him,' she said, eating a slice of cheese.

'Yes...since the last woman who came to his door to shout at him last year we haven't seen much of him.'

'I see...and why has that made you think?'

'Well...Elsie needs a place to stay, doesn't she? I was thinking that maybe she could stay there now.'

'Who's the owner of that place?'

'I am.' She looked at him surprised. 'Remember my father was a handyman? He had some of his stuff there, it was part of this house. Actually, he wanted to put a door connecting the two but we never did that. Father had a big heart and he lent it to Mr Lewis for as long as he needed it. Rent free...until last night, I suppose.'

'And he never paid you anything?'

'Mr Lewis and father played together as boys, he would never charge a friend rent. And now I could give it to Elsie, I mean...if you want. You don't have to answer just yet.'

'I already know my answer,' she looked down, taking a deep breath. 'And it's yes. I think that's a good idea. Elsie can't just stay at Laura's forever. She needs a place of her own.'

'I agree! And...if she's nearer you, she can always give you a hand when you need it.'

'Are you saying I can't manage, Mr Bates?' She shot him a serious look, trying to mask a playful grin on her lips.

'I would never say such thing but...' he bit his bottom lip shyly. 'if everything goes as nature allows, soon you will be carrying my child,' slowly, he caressed her stomach over the sheets. 'and you will be needing help. More of us to deal with,' he smiled, and Anna looked up at him, her eyes soft and a placid smile on her lips. She brought her hand to his face and caressed his cheek before placing a small kiss on his lips.

'Now you eat everything and get dressed,' he said a moment after. 'I'm sure Elsie would love to hear it from you.' He kissed her lips once again and stayed with her until the noise of the children came from the front room.

That afternoon Anna would tell the good news to Elsie and soon she would be living right next door, like the family they were. And although life had so much more in store for them, for now, they would make the most of these peaceful times. The time to face storms is when you see the darkness on the horizon and feel the strong winds against your face...neither were felt...not yet.

* * *

_**Next Chapter:** All Hallow's Eve festivities in the rookery*. A month goes by and Elsie finally moves next door. _

_*Rookery is the name given to English slums. Thanks to Terriejane, who teaches me lots of wonderful things, now I know the proper term :D_

_**Thank you for reading :)**_


	15. Chapter 15

_**A/N:** It's Friday and that means a new chapter :D Thank you all for your reviews, faves and follows! _

_It's All Hallow's Eve, Elsie moves next door, and an old character comes back. Hope you enjoy :) wish you all a grand weekend!_

_**Disclaimer:** Same as chapter 1-14_

* * *

October would be over in a matter of hours and everyone prepared for the party. The bonfire was set to be lit in the middle of the crossroads, well away from the ancient buildings. Musicmakers and revelers were gathering outside, and for a moment they all seemed to forget the misery that was their lives.

Children played together, waiting for the bonfire to be set and soon its smoke and flames would be as tall as a grown man. That's when boys and girls began to jump over it, trying to prove their worth by the lack of a burn. Only a few managed to come out clean, but that didn't mean the ones who lost would stop at first try. That entertainment would last through the night, until the fire turned to searing ashes, and then another kind of game commenced. Who would be brave enough to run over it barefoot? Not many, but young William Bates would.

There was a slight breeze blowing against their faces and the freezing air soaking in their bones, but it was All Hallow's Eve and that meant everyone would be outside, facing the cold for a bit of fun, singing and dancing. The performances and the crowd, together with the bonfire would warm up their spirits and bodies, with a little help of a few sips of rum now and then. Even children were allowed to wet their lips. Some of course, would drink more than they should.

Anna witnessed everything around her with wild eyes and a wide smile on her face. Never in her life she had seen such enjoyment in people's face. Everyone laughed and sang and danced, and that brought back some memories. Grand parties in great houses. Lots of food and drinks, and luxurious dresses and people. Fragrant men and rouged ladies. Just people standing around with bored looks on their faces. Not the same enthusiasm...not even close.

Here people were dressed with their usual clothes. Some not so clean and some with missing teeth. The children were barefoot and their faces were dirty and their hair didn't move with the wind. Here there was a barrel of cheap rum and a few sausages and bread, and the orchestra was a group of five men; two with violins, one with a banjo and two others with accordions. But Anna never felt so joyful in all her life.

People danced at their own pace, and women were loud and loose, picking men to dance and swinging their dark skirts around them. Those who were not dancing, were singing or clapping, watching as the braver ones dared a stepin' time to the lively music. And the flames grew higher by the minute...

'Oh Elsie, isn't this marvelous?!'

'Oh yes, it really is. I've missed these gatherings...when I was young I would be the first one to dance.' Elsie smiled at her memories, easier times that she had lived through. Happy times.

'You are still young Elsie! Go dance.' Anna encouraged.

'Goodness me! I rather watch now. You should be the one dancing though. Where's your husband?'

'Over there,' her daughter pointed out. Her husband was tall and smiling, talking with old friends.

Anna's eyes shone as brightly as the flames. The cold was not felt anymore. She was clapping and her body was moving with the music. She caught a glimpse of William, Elsa and George running off with other children. That's when she felt his arms coming around her middle as he leaned into her back.

'I see you are enjoying the festivities,' he told her before placing a soft kiss just under her ear and tightening his grip around her.

'I surely am,' she smiled to herself, caressing his possessive arms with her hands. 'I've never seen so much joy in all my life. So much fun.'

'All Hallow's in the Rookery is bigger than Christmas,' he said. 'It's when we go outside and sing and dance our misery away, they say. Mother used to tell me that all the time.'

'I didn't know you danced.' She turned in his arms with a mischievous look in her eyes.

'Well, I don't, not really.' John grinned down at her, holding her with both hands now. 'I just sing...a little. When nobody's looking.' He leaned slowly to capture her lips in a sweet kiss.

'Mr Bates!' Her cheeks were flushed and she smacked his shoulder gently. 'We are in public.'

'You are my wife! Everyone knows that, and we don't abide so much by societies rules here. If a man wants to kiss his wife and she wants to be kissed, then by all means...' This time the kiss was ardent but it didn't take long for them to break apart. John knew there were still limits, even for a married couple.

'Come,' she pleaded. Her eyes daring him as she smiled, taking his hand in hers and pulling him to the middle of the crowd of dancers..

'What are you doing?' he asked.

'Dance with me?'

'Anna...I don't dance.' He chuckled almost shyly but her eyes were defying him and he continued to follow her willingly.

'I don't know how to dance like that... teach me, John.'

All was lost. She had used his christian name outside the confines of their marital room. A name that she would call him in the throes of passion, whenever he would give her what she most desired. A name only moaned in the intimacy of their lovemaking and that he hoped to hear for the rest of his days.

It was his time to lead her now and for the first time in many, many years, John Bates danced.

This dance was unlike anything Anna had ever participated in. Bodies clashed and the heat of their skin could be felt through their clothing. Early Winter was almost forgotten as the sweat gathered at everyone's brows. John's breathing was heavy against the skin of her neck as he dared to come impossibly close to her, and all she could hear now was the music and the sound of his erratic breath. The air smelled of smoke and wood and of him, and she felt like she was in a dazzled dream, moving her body in his arms while her eyes closely watched his own movements.

Her greyish dress contrasted with the silk of her skin and golden hair, and her blue eyes were dark, the flames of the bonfire fusing with the fire of her soul. He saw it then, when he locked eyes with her, that this dance would soon be taken to the next level. And he was proven right, when she pulled at him again, this time out of the crowd of people, walking to their former spot.

'Elsie,' Anna breathed, tired, but ecstatic. 'Where are the children?'

Elsie looked at both with a knowingly look and she told them to go inside. 'Don't you worry, I'll see them to bed. You can...go rest.' A playful smile graced her features and she knew exactly why they were going inside so early. Rest would be the last thing they would be doing. Anna didn't see this but John did and he nodded shyly and thankful to Elsie before going inside.

'I thought you wanted to dance all night.' he said with a smile on his lips when they entered the bedroom, her hand still in his, pulling him to her.

'I changed my plans...I hope you don't mind.' She let go of his hand then and faced the wardrobe, her back at him.

'I will never mind you taking me to our room...with such racy plans in store.' He approached her then, placing his hands on her shoulders. 'You've been my wife for a week today.' His lips searched for her earlobe.

'The happiest week of my life.' She leaned her head back, as he nibbled at the skin of her neck. 'I thought we should celebrate.'

'Oh, we will my darling.'

They knew the ins and outs of their clothing well by now and it never took too long to disrobe. She was facing him now, their naked bodies pressed together, the heat travelling from one to the other and his pulsing hardness trapped between them. John held her close, kissing her lips and along her jaw and neck, as she moaned in his arms, her hands reaching to cup him in her eagerness. He growled against her skin as she began to stroke him and he reached for one of her breasts and squeezed it gently before taking its taut nipple in his mouth. The din of the music outside masked her cries of pleasure and she let herself drown in the sounds of their lovemaking. Since their wedding night they hadn't been able let go like this.

As he suckled on her soft breasts, moving from one to the other, she tightened her grip around his length, directing it to the juncture of her thighs, feeling the warmth of his burning skin against her lower belly. She told him she ached for him, that she needed him inside her, and he looked deeply into her eyes again and she saw his own darkening. A kind of look she had never seen before and he bit his lower lip, wetting it with his tongue. One more fierce kiss was all it took for him to turned her in his arms, and pin her against the wardrobe. She felt his hardness pulsing against her lower back and she gasped in anticipation.

'I want you like this,' he whispered in her ear as his hand touched her. His fingers caressing her wet folds. 'Please, Anna.' His voice was no more than a muffled plea as he nibbled gently on her shoulder. He closed his eyes sighing and she let out a low moan when he parted her and teased her with his index finger. Anna could only nod. Words too complicated to articulate at such a moment. Her husband was behind her, his body leaning heavily against her, his breathing and tongue teasing her skin and his manhood pressed against her bottocks. He was warm and restless, she was trembling and weak. Her insides tightening with every touch and sound. The anticipation nearly killing her. _What is he going to do? _

At first, he was gentle. He had never taken her standing, much less from behind. He positioned her in the perfect angle, as she leaned forward against the door of the wardrobe. Then he placed his hands on her hips before dragging them along her behind, touching her again one last time before spreading her skin and rubbing his length slowly against her. The sounds she made were a sort of whining, a low begging for him to take her.

'John,' she cried, driving herself against him, moving her hips according to his teasing.

Of course he didn't need any more incentive than this, so with a steady thrust he slid into her, sighing as his length came in contact with her heat.

His first movements were gentle, testing. Mostly to give her time to get used to this new kind of lovemaking, but soon enough, she was leaning back against him, wrapping one arm around his neck and demanding more from his part.

John rested his forehead against her shoulder, kissing and biting her skin now and then, as his thrusts became more erratic. Her walls contracting around him as their sweaty bodies moved together. With every movement, he pulled her hips to him, grabbing her as he drove himself deeper and faster into her. The sound of their bodies coming together sending both over the edge, and the sight of her naked back and bottom making all the hairs on his body stand to a frenetic attention. Shivers down his spine. His head spinning and the feel of her all around him. He spreaded his legs then, for better support, leaning entirely against her and dragging one hand along her stomach, stopping between her legs and caressing her there, in rhythm with his thrusts, while the other came to hold one of her breasts, massaging and squeezing it urgently.

'Oh God, John!' Was all she could say. The raw emotions of the moment making it impossible to find sense in words.

'Anna...' he suckled on her neck. 'you... feel wonderful.'

They laid in bed afterwards. Bare from clothes and troubles. Resting in each other's arms. Their end had come abruptly, almost fiercely. First Anna, then John, and they only had the energy to throw themselves on their bed, their legs too weak to function.

She was laying her head in his chest, and he rested his chin against the crown of her head, taking a deep breath before closing his eyes.

'Now that was something.' Anna giggled into his skin as her hand played with his chest hairs.

'Something indeed,' he chuckled and she looked up at him.

'I liked it.' He smiled at her and she brought herself up to kiss his lips.

'What's this from?' she asked then, tracing a dent on his cheek.

'What?' His hand came to his face, trying to understand what she was talking about. 'Oh, just a scar.'

Anna rolled her eyes. 'I know it's a scar, silly. But, what's the story behind it?'

'Let me see if I remember.' His hand was now in her hair, caressing its loose strands. 'I was ten I think, maybe eleven, and there was this boy I would fight all the time...well, he threw a stone at me once after I called his mother a bad name.'

'Ever the rebel I see,' she grinned.

'I was a child. I saw his mother kissing a man that was not her husband and I had to bring it to our quarrels to make it more real. Children.' He lifted his brow. 'Now, your turn,' he said, looking attentively at her, as if he needed to! For so many nights he had admired her in her sleep, he already knew all her freckles and marks. 'What's this one here?' He traced a barely visible scar near her left eye and she looked down almost ashamed. 'What's the matter?'

'It was my...Mrs Smith did it to me. Many years ago.' She took a deep breath, trying to shake away such memory.

'Why did she do that?' His look was concerned.

'I broke a china doll. An expensive one.'

'I'm so sorry,' he said, kissing the top of her head.

'She used to hit me for no reason at all. I never understood why...I know now,' she said uneasily, her fingers tracing his chest and belly.

'Anna...please. There's no excuse for what she did. She's just a wicked woman.'

'I would forgive her if she asked me to,' Anna confessed, resting her head on his chest again. Trying to find comfort in her husband's warmth.

'That's because you are a kind, loving soul, my darling. Oh!' The sound of the children in the house caught their attention. Elsie was telling them not to make a sound. Surely that was something impossible for those three to manage.

'Let's pretend we are sleeping,' Anna whispered, almost giving herself away with a giggle.

'Shhh, blow out the candle. Quickly,' John replied, his voice barely audible. 'Elsie will take care of them tonight. See, I told you she would help.'

'You are a sneaky devil, John Bates!' Anna grinned before burying her face in the crook of his neck. No one bothered them that night.

The music lasted long into the night, but that didn't affect anyone's sleep, rather it worked as a sort of happy lullaby for those who called it a night earlier than the others. No one complained. Everyone woke up the next day in a good mood. Indeed there's no better way to wash one's misery than to sing, dance, and above all, love.

'I've warned you, and warned you, for a week, but did you listen? No!' John Bates was kneeling before his son, cleaning his feet with a wet cloth, while the boy cried in pain. 'You never listen, do you? Never!'

'Poor thing, Mr Bates. Be careful.' Anna pleaded as she watched the scene.

John looked up at her with an annoyed look. 'I'm being careful, I can't be more careful than this, but his feet are burnt. Every little touch will hurt.' He looked back at his son with a pointed look. 'And will that teach you? Or will you do it again, just like you did last year?!'

William cried silently. His sobs dying in his throat as his eyes filled with tears. He pouted, giving away his very young age that sometimes it would be forgotten by the way he spoke and presented himself. 'I was dared to do it. Jacob dared me. I couldn't refuse could I? That would make me a weak man.'

'You've barely left your nappies! A weak man...' John sighed, shaking his head. 'Would you jump in the fire if Jacob dared you to as well?' He grimaced when he saw William's feet peeling. The skin was red and irritated, walking wouldn't be happening in the next few days.

'Is it too bad?' Anna asked, worried, caressing the boy's scruffy hair.

'He won't be able to go to work next week probably. He will survive but he has to rest his feet for a while.'

William began to whimper. 'There, it's alright my darling. Everything will be alright.' Anna tried to soothe the boy.

'As long as Pa doesn't pull my ear off.' The boy hid his face in her skirts.

'No worries, darling.' Anna leaned into the child. 'Your father loves you too much...he would pull his own ear off first.'

John looked seriously at her, scolding her mentally but she could only grin back at him. She's right, he thought to himself. But William didn't have to know that!

'There's no need for an ear pull. You've already been punished,' John told his son as he took him in his arms and placed him in the bottom bunk. 'Now you lay down and you'll stay there until they heal...walking in blazing ashes...these children will be the death of me,' he sighed. 'I'm going to work now. Good I don't have an employer.'

'Don't be such a grump.' Anna wrapped her arms around him and kissed his lips. 'You have a good day.'

Before he left he kissed her one more time, hugging her close to him. 'I'll miss you.'

'Now, William, you stay here, I'm going to do some washing before it starts raining. You call me if you need something, alright?'

'Don't mind me, Anna...I'll be here, still as a statue.'

'Good boy.' She leaned over him and kissed his forehead before leaving with a basket of dirty clothes.

That was November first. William in bed with his feet aching, trying to hoover on his elbows now and then to look outside the window while his cousins played with the other children.

Surely, that wouldn't be the last time William Bates would walk over blazing coals, nor the last time his father would threaten to pull his ears off. He would do it for many years and many bonfires. His stories about such kind of entertainment would live with him forever. The way his father would scold him and the way his new mother would always kiss his pain away. He would tell them to his children before bed and every time he would turn into his younger energetic self, once again, full of life and dreams, wild eyes and a cheeky grin. These hard times would always be remembered with a smile on his face, and a longing that sometimes would make him teary with emotion...the happiest of childhoods, that's what William had. A father he loved so much and a mother that he would come to worship. A woman who gave them everything they never had, and that would tell him exactly when a child is no longer a child. But he would be a child for many years still...and in a way, he would always be. A teller of tales never really grows up...not like everyone else.

By the end of November, Elsie Hughes was living next door. Her new home was a small open space, no divisions. Two windows in each side of the entrance door, an old stove, a fireplace and a bed. Little by little they were able to get her a cabinet they found abandoned on the street and some dishes. Second hand bedding was bought at the market and a water pitcher, a pot and one pan. For her, it was perfect. She had never had her own things. Not like this.

In one month's time, Anna had learned how to sew and together with her mother they now mended clothes for money. Elsie would help with the washing too, and they had a handful of clients, almost a little business of their own. Elsa would help too, hanging the clothes and learning how to mend holes in socks and trousers. Things were going well for the women, but not for John.

It was winter and the cold rain was wreaking havoc on his work. No one would stop to have their boots polished. Too cold, too windy.. gentlemen would ignore him in the street, avoiding at all cost the horrible weather.

He leaned against a wall at present, protecting himself from the rain. Downcast and depressed. His wife was the one earning for the family...for him that was the worse thing that could possibly happen. He was the husband, the father, the man of the house. He should be able to provide and support his family, not the other way around. What kind of man was he? A failure. He was doomed to a life depending on his wife for a plate of food...He sighed, taking his cap off his head and running one hand through his hair.

'Are you working today, Sir?' A voice shook him from his thoughts. 'I fancy a shining, if you still do it.'

'Of course, Sir!' John sat down immediately on his little bench, motioning to the well dressed gentleman to place his foot on the polish box. 'If you please, Sir.'

He took a cloth from his box and began to clean all traces of rain and mud from the boot.

'Have you been here for long?' The gentleman tried to make small talk.

'Since six.' John focused on the task at hands.

'Not many clients I suppose, with this awful weather.'

'Unfortunately you are correct.'

'And tell me...how's your wife doing?'

That stilled John's movements and he looked up at the man before him.

'My wife, Sir?' _What kind of question..._

'Ah, I see you don't remember me. But I remember you,' the man smiled. 'Charles Johnson.' He stretched his hand out to John. 'Do you remember me now?'

John swallowed hard and clenched his jaw, looking from his hand to his face. 'What do you want?'

Charles furrowed his brow in confusion, dropping his hand. 'I want clean boots, Mr Bates. What else would I want from you?'

'Well, you shall have it then.' Pursing his lips John continued to work.

'But tell me, how's Anna?' John looked up at him again with a threatening look on his face. 'I just really want to know.'

'She's well...better than the state that you left her...that night.' He lifted his brow, annoyed. Memories rushing forward. The night when Charles kissed Anna forcefully and she ran away from him.

The well dressed man took a deep breath and looked down, his face apologetic. 'I regret what I did that night. I truly do. I was a beast...and I would like to apologize for my awful behaviour.'

'Anna's better than anyone else, I'm sure you are already forgiven.'

'You are right about that...that she's better than anyone else.' He cleared his throat nervously. 'I loved her...maybe I still do.'

John stood from his bench abruptly, his nostrils flaring in anticipation. His heart racing in his chest turning his ears red almost in fury. The man before him wearing a fancy suit, bowler hat and an ashamed expression on his face.

'That's why I am so sorry about what I did and why I'm asking how she is. I want her to be fairing well.'

'You are done. Tuppence.' John said, stretching his hand, waiting for his payment.

'I wish we could part well. Honestly. I'm so sorry about...your situation...you can keep the change.'

John look down at his hand; twice more than what he had charged. He nodded, almost irritated as he watched Charles make his way to a carriage on the other side of the road. What did he want now? Wasn't he in India? John shook his head in displeasure and he hoped that was the last time he would see the man.

But of course, that wouldn't be the case. Everyday Charles' carriage would stop and he would ask John to shine his boots. Everyday he would pay him twice the price for his service but they never spoke more than necessary. He would watch John work in silence, or he would read a paper, but he wouldn't miss one day.

There were days John wanted to ask him what was he doing there, but he never did.

_Whatever_, he would think. _He pays well and I need the money. _For a man like John Bates, that wasn't an easy fact to accept but he had no choice. One day maybe...he would have the courage to give the gentleman his change without arguing. And indeed that day would come.

This young lawyer would prove himself to be a man of principle and good heart and John would pay him well for the loyalty that he was yet to demonstrate.

That day when John arrived home he told Anna what had happened and she heard to his every word with a surprised look on her face. She didn't want charity from Charles, she told her husband. They didn't need him, but after a long discussion she ended up agreeing with John. _All money is good money at the moment._ _We are in no situation to turn down what people have to offer us, even if it comes from Charles Johnson._ _You don't earn much with the washing and the mending and we have mouths to feed. I need to accept this. He's my only client at the moment. When I have more, maybe when Spring comes, the weather is better, people go out in the streets, maybe then I can refuse his charity. _

'You are so proud...what's happening?' she asked him.

'I just want us to have food on our table. That is all,' he told her at last, teary eyed, his head down. 'You shouldn't have to work. You should be home...taking care of the children.'

She sat down beside him, her hand coming around his shoulders. 'All the women here work, John. I don't mind. We are two, and the two of us will work for this family.'

John shook his head. A sad smile playing on his lips. 'You are a lady, Anna. You weren't born for this.'

'But don't you see that this is what I want to do? If it means that I have you by my side?' She touched his cheek. 'For you, I would do anything...everything. I would.' Both her hands caressed his face before pulling him for a kiss.

But time does fly, and there's nothing you can do to stop it. For one month Charles _visited _John. Anna began to teach William and Elsa their letters. Elsie was in charge of taking the clothes to their owners, and while all this was happening December arrived, and within its life two things would happen. Neither would be good.

* * *

_**Next Chapter:** Christmas time. Anna and Maggie come face to face. William has a gift for the family and Anna has a special guest for Christmas eve._

**_Thank you for reading :) _**


	16. Chapter 16

_**A/N:** Good evening readers :D one more chapter of this story and it's Christmas time! I hope you enjoy it. Thank you all for your reviews and I wish you all a great weekend :)_

_**Disclaimer:** Same as chapter 1-15._

* * *

_Anna sat __on_ _the bench on their rooftop. The night sky in the horizon was almost pale, giving away the thick clouds that were threatening to spend again. London was washed __clean_ _by the rain. Even the dirtiest of places seemed to shine as the __sparse_ _lamplights tried to __brighten_ _up the darkened city. From up __here__, Anna could see for miles and she felt free and __small__. From __here,_ _she realised how_ _unimportant people were, compared to the immensity of everything else, and she cried. Maybe people were unimportant, maybe they didn't matter at all, maybe one day humans would cease to exist but for now everything mattered to her. Every little thing that happened, and that's why she cried. Maybe if you compared the reason __for_ _her tears with the misery of fallen women, or with the empty bellies of crying babes, you would find it ridiculous... but sometimes, even the __best of people_ _have the right to be selfish. The right to think of nothing else but __their_ _own dreams, hopes...wishes. And what Anna wished for the most wasn't happening. _

_She had a wonderful husband and a roof over her head. The children were healthy and growing before her eyes and if she really thought about it, she would think herself to be the most ridiculous of women in all her unpredictable luck. But she wasn't. She was just one woman who loved her husband...it was only natural. _

XXXXXX

In the week before Christmas, one thing would happen to Anna. And yes, one of the two bad things.

The day was cold and the rain was a mere whisper, a misting of what it had been the night before. The children surely didn't feel a thing. With their bodies warm from the running and games, even when the rain was heavy they wouldn't mind it one bit.

Anna and Elsie were folding clothes in the later's house, and they were making plans for Christmas' Eve.

'I'm going to invite someone to dine with us,' the younger woman smiled with a secretive expression in her face.

'Oh my, who?' Elsie asked filled with curiosity.

'It's a surprise. I think...I think you will approve.' Anna nodded finishing the last piece of clothing. 'Done! We won't have more washing for a week. Thank God!'

'It's so hard to get it dry in the winter,' Elsie sighed.

'The house is smelling damp again because I have to hang it in the middle of the front room.'

'Oh my, my old back.' Her mother sat on a chair rubbing her side with her hand. 'My bones haven't welcomed old age nicely, I tell you.'

'Don't worry, Elsie, William will take the basket. Mrs Kent said she wanted it before the weekend.' Anna took the basket of clothes in her hands and walked to the opened door. 'William?!' she called but the boy was nowhere to be found, neither were his cousins. 'Where on Earth are those children? John won't like this if he arrives home before them.' she pursed her lips.

'Nevermind them. They must be running up and down like rabbits, that's what children do. I'll take it.' Elsie said, rising from her chair.

'Nonsense. You've been mending all night, you should rest. I'll take it myself.'

'Not alone you won't.'

'Come on, Elsie. I'm a big girl now.' Anna chuckled but Elsie's face remained serious.

'You don't know the corners and alleys of these streets, Anna.'

The younger woman rolled her eyes. 'I've been there before, I know the way.'

Before Elsie could say another word, Anna was out of the door, making her way to Mrs Kent's house. That was something she would regret.

XXXXXX

'Dammit! My tooth just fell out.' William spat, rubbing his tongue along his tender gums. 'Right in the place I need it the most.' One of his canines was missing.

'Where is it?' George asked, quite scared with the sight. He was yet too young to be shedding teeth.

'I think I swallowed it,' William replied, inspecting the ground in hopes he was wrong. He wasn't.

'I swallowed my first dead tooth. I mean, I think I did because I couldn't use the pot for three days after that. Ma said the tooth was blocking the way out.' Elsa twisted her nose with a disgusted look on her face.

'Happens.' William shrugged his shoulders. 'Rumour has it if you swallow a big one you will explode, the reason being that one you just said...Martin Spencer died because of that.'

'Martin Spencer?' Elsa thought for a moment. 'Martin Spencer was old enough to be your Pa when he died. His shedding teeth were all gone already.'

'Martin Spencer had rotten teeth and one of them was so rotten it fell right down his throat. It doesn't matter how old you are, Elsa, what matters is the size of the tooth.'

Her cousin rolled his eyes before adjusting his braces with both hands. 'Whatever you say.' Elsa shook her head. 'What are we doing here?'

'Trading goods...'

'Trading what?' Elsa followed her cousins' hurried steps while dragging her brother along by his hand.

'Listen, Elsa. There are two kind of folks in the world. The ones who waste their lives and the ones who live them plenty, and the ones who are clever enough to remedy themselves.'

'That's three kinds, William.'

'Three then. Three kinds of folks, and I'm the later.'

'I'm not sure you are even half clever, much less clever enough,' Elsa grimaced.

'Well, for a two weeks now, after work, I've been helping Mr Travis with the washing of his storefront and stairs, and he told me that he would give me a sack full of fresh apples as my payment. I'm here to receive it.' William straightened himself tall and confidant and held hands with his cousins. 'Let's cross the road.'

In the other side, Mr Travis, an old and polite man waited for him with a sack at his feet.

'William, boy, you are always on time, aren't you?' The man let go of a low laugh, his wrinkled skin moving as he did so. 'Here you go, just as we agreed. A sack of apples for you and your family.'

'Thank you, Mr Travis.' The boy took his cap off saluting the old man. 'Every one of them will be appreciated with delight.'

The man shook his head smiling. 'Can you take the sack home? It's heavy.'

The boy held the sack and with an helping hand from Mr Travis he swung it over his shoulder. 'I'm a tough lad, Sir. Ask my Pa about it and he'll tell you I say no lies. See you next week.'

The man waved to the children and helped the younger ones crossing the road, as now William had both his hands occupied with trying to manage his goods, almost dragging it on the ground. He wasn't a short child, not at all, but that was some big sack of apples!

'Appreciated with delight?' Elsa asked in mocking manner. Some words were still hard to pronounce.

'You should pay more attention when my Ma Anna teaches us our letters. You learn all sorts of fancy words that, as you saw, will help you in your life.' He looked over at the other two. 'I'm here to live my life plenty, Elsa. You mark my words.'

'So you'll be two kind of folks after all.' she remarked.

'Better two kind than no kind at all.'

The three children made their way home. One of them carrying almost six pounds of apples and the other two holding hands, trying not to get lost. Those apples would be appreciated indeed, by the body and the soul. At least, they would make Anna smile after everything...

XXXXXX

'Oh my...but...' Anna looked around herself, the basket already so heavy in her arms. She was lost.

The streets were all the same and she swore she knew the way to Mrs Kent's house but she had been wrong. She had been there only two times, both with Elsie, and maybe she never really paid attention to it. Mrs Kent lived just outside of the rookery, in a middle class type of house, although she was wealthy enough to have a cook and to pay for someone like Anna to wash her family's clothes.

The rain was building in strength and Anna tried to protect the items from getting wet with one hand, resting the basket against her hipbone. Where was she? Surely she had taken a wrong street because she was nowhere near the outside of these narrow alleys she lived in. Looking around again, she tried to recognise something or someone that could help her but all she saw was a woman lurking in the shadows. She took a deep breath and approached her.

'Please, can you help me?...I'm afraid I'm lost,' she pleaded.

'Oh are you now, Mrs Bates?'

Anna looked at her confused. 'Do I know you?'

'You don't know me but I know you...' the slender woman walked toward her. She was skinny and her cheekbones were sharp. She was wearing a rather daring reddish dress, her breasts trying to escape from the neckline, and her dark hair glistening with grease. Anna swallowed hard. That intimidating figure eyeing her from head to toe, making her feel rather embarrassed for something she knew not. 'Mr Bates' wife...and former lady. Do tell me, does that husband of yours treat you the way you deserve?' She rounded her touching her golden hair. 'I see he does not.'

'I can assure you he does.' Anna replied anxious. 'Can you tell me where...'

'Tell you something about men, darling, they are all the same, you know. You are beautiful and you smell of fresh flowers...but if you don't give them what they really want they go out to seek the comforts of women like me.'

Anna blushed and averted her eyes. 'Just let him take all your youth away and he'll be out in the search for another.'

'You talk like that because you don't know better. Do you really think good men seek women like you? You don't know they exist because you don't exist for them.' Anna told her, trying to make her way past her. She was furious with the woman's insinuations and anxiety and fear were building in her body.

'That's what you think, Missy. If your husband is as good as you say ask him how do I know him so well.'

Anna smiled then. An ironic smile she wouldn't show very often. She knew exactly who that woman was. 'I know who you are. Maggie. If you think I'm foolish enough to drink from your poison cup, you are very mistaken.'

'Don't you need help?' Maggie asked as Anna moved along.

'I would rather walk side by side with the devil,' Anna told her before looking at her one more time. 'See...I know more about you than you know about me.' she lifted one eyebrow at her before she continued to walk, and that left Maggie without an answer, but not without revenge.

'Sam!' she called when Anna was out of sight. 'Follow her.'

A man came from the shadows, the teeth in his mouth rotten and a smell that could raise the dead. 'What's the girl done?'

'Oh, she's done plenty, she did. Take care of her, will you? Just a scratch. She's too pretty to be broken.'

The man grinned and made his way along the alley. What did Anna do? She married the man Maggie wanted most.

'You take your filthy hands from my Ma!'

The sack of apples fell to the ground and William jumped on the vicious man. His arms around his neck, one hand trying to poke him in the eye. 'You don't touch her. You don't touch her!'

Elsa held her brother against the tall wall and she closed her eyes as her cousin bit the man's left ear.

'You bastard!' Sam yelled as he let go off Anna and held his bleeding ear. 'I'm going to kill you!' he turned to the boy.

'You do just that and my Pa, John Bates, will come after you, you bloody demon from hell.' William stood facing him as he were as tall as his rival. 'You'll be dead anyway with what you did to my Ma. Don't you think I don't know who you are Samuel Mall, because I do know!'

Anna was leaning against the wall, trying to regain her breathing and to understand what was happening around her. Her head was sore and her dress was torn. She tasted a bit of blood in her mouth. 'William,' she gasped.

'Don't worry, Anna.' The boy took one of her shaky hands. 'You'll be alright.' He caressed her cheek gently before telling his cousins to help him gather the clothes that had fallen from the basket. Sam had run away, but he wouldn't be safe for long.

'What on earth-' John saw his son first, but when he saw his wife, his heart jumped in his chest. 'Oh God, what happened.' He reached for her, carefully holding her face between his hands. 'William, what happened? Anna?'

She couldn't say a word, not yet. She had to sit down first and to be sure she was home, safe and sound.

'Sam Mall,' the boy began, resting his heavy sack of apples on the floor. 'He was treating her poorly. Did all that all by himself.' His father kneeled before Anna, his hands making sure she was still in one piece. She began to cry. 'I was passing by, lucky enough,' William continued, 'and I bit of a big chunk of his ear, I did. He wouldn't let her be any other way.'

'Oh, Anna.' John sobbed. 'Oh my darling, what did he do to you? Did he-'

'No,' she interrupted him. 'He didn't. Nothing happened...' she looked at the brave boy. 'If William hadn't show up...I don't even want to...think about it.'

'Sshh, my love. You're safe now.' Anna rested her head on John's shoulder, one of his hands on the back of her neck and the other caressing her back, trying to soothe her. 'You'll be alright. Let me see your face, love.'

'The clothes,' she cried, as her husband inspected her swollen lip. 'I have to wash everything again and Mrs Kent wanted them before the weekend.'

'We'll give some excuse to Mrs Kent. You have to worry about yourself now. Going alone, Anna. What were you thinking?' He touched her lip and she cringed. 'I'm sorry.'

'They walk alone all the time' she looked over to the children. 'Why can't I do it?'

'They were born here, they know the ways in and out. You don't. It's confusing, Anna, even for me sometimes.'

Elsa and George were sitting in the bottom bunk, watching the scene with serious, scared eyes.

'Here, Anna.' William gave her a shining apple. 'To cheer you up,' he smiled giving her a wink.

'What's that?' John asked, looking at the sack.

'Christmas present from me... to all.' The boy looked from his father to Anna.

'William! Did you steal them?' John rose and walked towards it.

'I swear I didn't do such thing, Pa! I know your teachings well enough not to do that.'

'Where did you get them, then? Fresh apples, William!'

'I worked for them,' the boy said, resting his hands on his hips, proudly.

'You what?'

'I've been working for Mr Travis after work. I wash his storefront and his stairs. The one who sells clocks and watches downtown... I said 'Mr Travis, I want no money but I want goods,' and I said 'Food is good goods enough,' and he said he would give me some fresh apples, a sack full of'em and Mr Travis' a man of word, as you can see. And so am I.'

John looked at his son for a moment. His mouth half opened, his expression impressed. 'You are a cheeky devil, you know,' he smiled at last and pulled his son toward him. 'And a fine lad, I tell you. The finest.'

'And a hero,' Anna added, smiling at the boy. The apple in her hand. 'You will be a fine gentleman one day, the finest.'

She was right about that. A respectful gentleman William Bates would be. And of all her children, William would make Anna the proudest. He had been born in her heart, and a bond like that is as strong as blood. Sometimes even blood forgets its roots, but the heart always knows who it belongs to.

She sat in her bed now, undoing her hair. It was a mess after what that awful man tried to do, she wanted to brush and do it again. Her head was aching a little and her eyes were heavy, and tears began to form as she thought about it. She heard the door opening then, and the figure of her husband coming to sit beside her. He had a damp cloth in his hand and a worried expression. Almost painful.

'Let me clean your lip,' he said.

'I'm sorry...I shouldn't have gone all by myself... you've warned me about it and I didn't listen.'

'Sshh,' John whispered tenderly, doing his best not to hurt her. 'It was not your fault. You shouldn't be afraid to walk around by yourself...but, unfortunately, you have to,' he sighed. 'Did he hit you?'

She shrugged her shoulders and shook her head. 'He grabbed me and kissed me,' she told him in disgust. 'He trapped me against the wall and tried to... touch me...I bit myself trying to fight back.' John nodded caressing her cheek. 'That's when William arrived. Thank God.'

'Come here,' he urged when she began to cry again and she leaned her head against his warm, inviting chest. 'He'll regret what he did.' He clenched his jaw but his hands were gentle caressing her back.

'No. Don't do anything, please. I don't want you to get in trouble,' she said, hugging him close to her.

'Don't you worry my love. Nothing bad will happen to any of us. I promise. Now,' he pulled away from her enough to look in her eyes. 'You change and wash. I'll warm up the soup for us and then,' his hands running up and down the sides of her arms, 'we'll go to bed earlier. You need to rest after the awful day you had.'

Anna nodded with a small smile on her face and less than two hours later the house fell into a peaceful silence. That night William was in charge of the storytelling while his father held his new mother close to his chest to sleep, and although the clever boy was a great teller of tales, bedtime stories weren't his forte. Not yet.

'I don't want to hear it!' George pouted, his hands clamped tight over his ears.

'Silence you silly boy! Pa and Anna are sleeping.' William scolded his little cousin.

'But William, we don't want to hear a story about vampires. It's scary. It'll give us nightmares,' Elsa said, trying to persuade her cousin to tell them a story about fairies instead.

'Well, you shall have no story then because it's either vampires or shut your eyes and go to sleep without a tale.' William stated.

'Alright,' Elsa sighed, defeated.

'Make them good vampires!' George pleaded.

'For goodness sake, George, there's no such thing as good vampires. Now, silence...for the story I'm about to tell will make your blood cold in your veins.'

XXXXXX

'Wake up, lazy girl.' John kissed her nose as she pretended to be sleeping, but the growing smile on her lips gave herself away. 'I know you are awake!' he tickled her sides.

'Stop that!' she squealed. 'I'm awake, I'm awake.'

He sat up in bed, scratching his head sleepily.

'I'm rather excited to spend Christmas Eve with you,' she sat up besides him and wrapped her arms around his shoulders, kissing his cheek lovingly. 'Our first Christmas together!'

'I am too. And curious to know who's coming for dinner. I still don't understand why we have to wait for you to tell us.'

'Just promise me, you won't be cross at me if you happen to hate it.' She looked at him between her lashes.

'Oh my, I'm scared now,' he said. 'You didn't invite the...other side of your family, did you?' he teased her.

'Ah! As if...they wouldn't come if I had. Silly beggar.'

'Silly beggar?' he leaned against her, rubbing his nose against her neck. 'You know...' he whispered against her skin. 'the children are still sleeping...' his hands coming around her middle, holding her close to him.

'And?' she giggled as he bit her ear gently, pushing her down on bed.

'And I think we should take advantage of that. It's not every day that we can make love in the morning... and it's so good.'

'Was this your plan all along? When you woke me up?' She was now under him. His weight pinning her down deliciously into the mattress.

'You caught me,' he said. 'I'm guilty of that.'

One week had passed and Christmas Eve was upon them and Anna's guests would leave everyone with a surprised look on their faces, but in the end it would be the best Christmas dinner Anna had ever witnessed.

'Are you sure?' Elsie asked later with an ecstatic look on her face.

'Not sure but...' Anna looked around to be sure John was still outside. 'I am late and...I've been feeling poorly.'

'You should go to Mrs Oliver, she can tell you for sure if you are. She's better than a doctor for that, I tell you.' Elsie advised, her face beaming.

'Should I?'

'Oh yes, you should, just to be sure. I can go with you if you want.'

Anna nodded giving a small laugh. If she was right about it, she couldn't wait to tell John! He would be so happy. As happy as she felt right now.

'I have it!' John entered their home carrying wood for the fireplace and he noticed that the women had stopped talking. 'I hope you weren't cursing me behind my back.'

His wife walked towards him and kissed his lips. 'Whenever I talk behind your back it's to say nice things about you,' she told him. 'Now set that fire, we need to start cooking.'

Although he noticed his wife's easy secretive eyes and joyful expression he did not ask her what that was about, and that had been a good thing. With all her radiance maybe she would have told him everything and that would have broken his and her hearts even more.

XXXXXX

The night had settled and the table was ready. Three more plates for three guests that only Anna knew about. There was soup, a roasted chicken, a pie and apples. Not as fresh as the week before but still better than most apples they could afford to buy. And now they waited, but not for long.

Two soft knocks were heard on the door and Anna ran to open it. 'Thelma!' she announced, her smile shining on her features. 'Please come in. Hello,' she acknowledged the two small children by her side.

Thelma walked into the room with an embarrassed expression in her face, her children holding her hand's each and everyone else staring.

'Where are your manners, children?' Anna broke the silence, trying to make it easier for this poor woman. 'Won't you say good evening to your friends? You play with Ben and Tim, don't you?'

'All the time. And they didn't believe when I told them about our bunks. Tim there called me a shit teller.' Everyone looked at William now. Even John failed to scold his son. He was silent, taking in the guests that Anna had invited.

'Well, you will show Tim how wrong he was then.' Anna advised and William agreed.

'_See Timothy Cooper. I'm no shit teller.' _

'Thelma was going to spend her Christmas Eve alone with her children.' Anna tried to explain to Elsie and John. Truth was that Thelma was always alone, apart from when she was working, selling her body in exchange of money to feed her sons. She was short but really skinny, and her hair was up in a messy bun. Her dress was no more than a rag wrapped around her body, but they all noticed that, at least, she had washed herself, as best as she could. Thelma lived in the streets. She had no roof over her head. She slept in sheds and sometimes under a balcony...sometimes the stars would be her only blanket. Her children always followed.

'You did well, Anna.' John walked towards them, stretching his hand to this fallen woman. 'Welcome to our home, Thelma.' He remembered when she was just a girl. She had been pretty one day, now she was just a shadow of a woman. 'Come, sit with us!'

Thelma took his hand and thanked him almost tearily. For the first time in years she would have a decent meal. For the first time in years a man had approached her with a smile and no second intentions. For the first time in years she felt human again. She looked around herself as they ate. Her children laughed and the adults talked about everything and nothing as if she was a woman as proper as Anna and Elsie. John asked her if she wanted bread and he looked in her eyes as if she was as noble as his wife. She said no, and continued to eat her soup. For the first time in years she had true friends.

As for the presents... Elsa received a rag doll from Elsie that would set right besides the one that had belonged to Anna. George got a rag ball that he would play with until he was old enough to venture those streets all by himself. William was given a new cap. From Anna and John the children all received new boots and a lolly each, they had been able to save enough for those, Elsie helped too, and Ben and Tim were given the same sweet. Never before had those two boys had tried such thing.

And the adults relished in the children's laughter and joy. For people like them, presents were just for those under the age of twelve. But Anna did have a present when they went to bed that night.

John took a little box from the wardrobe and gave it to her.

'Open it,' he told her, and she did. The gift was a beautiful silver hairpin. Not too big but the colour would contrast with her golden hair. Anna smiled with tears in her eyes, and looked at her husband, and for a second she thought about telling him about her state, using that as a Christmas gift for him. But she thought twice about it; thank God for that! Maybe it was best if she saw Mrs Oliver tomorrow first, it would still be Christmas after all…

'I don't have anything to give you.' she said, tracing the pin with her fingers. She loved it so much.

'You are my gift, Anna. I need nothing else.' He smiled at her and she kissed him fiercely.

XXXXXX

_And that's why she cried now. Because at the moment she thought he would have nothing else from her._

_She dried her tears with both hands and looked over the horizon again. John couldn't see her like this...he would fret over nothing. After all they've only been married for two months, some people take longer than others, don't they? Two months was nothing at all. Three and four...well, maybe soon she would have good news. And on the sixth month, she still waited. That was the second bad thing that happened to Anna. A bloody trace of despair and disappoint, month after month._

* * *

_**Next Chapter:** Anna continues to struggle over the fact that she can't conceive and Elsie takes drastic measures with Maggie. John's work is slower than ever and when Anna's hope is reborn she sees no other option but to lie to her husband. _

_**Thank you for reading :)**_


	17. Chapter 17

_**A/N:** Good evening everyone :) Thank you so much for your support! I'm so happy to know that you are enjoying this story because I love writing it! _

_I hope you like this chapter :D_

_**Disclaimer:** Same as chapter 1-16. _

* * *

_Anna didn't tell anyone about what __was troubling_ _her so. She would cry __up on the_ _rooftop, __then_ _dry her tears and put on a smile before going home __to her family. _

_John would talk about __having a baby_ _sometimes. His eyes would __soften_ _and a big smile would spread __across_ _his lips, and every time that happened Anna's heart broke even more. She __felt like a failure__. Half a woman, with no future generations of her own. She was empty of grace and blessings and she was terrified about it. Her husband had a son, and she couldn't bear to be the problem...couldn't bear that someone else had been able to give him what she wanted to give him the most. He would be disappointed and she would be heartbroken. William was like a son to her, and she loved him so dearly, but his blood was someone else's, his hair wasn't hers and he was not half of her own. And she felt completely alone. One day, when Elsie and her father died, she would have no one else from her own flesh. _

_Surely there's more to __being_ _a woman than to be a mother, but when you love your husband more than anything, you crave for that part of him to grow inside of you. To have half of both that becomes a whole, running around and growing up before your eyes. The little expressions that remind you of him, and the way it smiles exactly like you. Yes, there's certainly more __to_ _being a woman, but not when you dream about that baby more than everything else._

'Come on, William...'Shall I compare thee...' come on, shall...' Anna encourage him to read from her book. Teaching children their letters was harder than what she thought it would be but she was determined to do it.

'Shall I compare thee... to... a summer's... day?' The boy read with difficulty but improvement.

**_'Thou art more lovely and more temperate: _**

**_Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May,'_**

'Elsa, are you following?' Anna lifted her brow at the girl who was picking her nose.

'Oh yes, yes I am.' Elsa nodded.

'Picking your nose won't help you, Elsa,' her cousin advised. 'If it did I would be reading this book in a second.'

'Enough of that now,' Anna chuckled. 'Continue William. You are doing so well.'

It was April, and the weather was improving together with William's reading skills. Both bright and eager, and full of energy. Anna had never seen the colours of these buildings and streets in the light of early spring. Everything was still dirty and dark but the sunlight tried with all its might to pierce through the darkest of alleys. There was still rain and wind and freezing mornings that could turn your bones to ice, but the afternoons were now almost pleasing and the rays of sun had the power to warm up one's face.

But winter can last a whole year if you lack a bit of luck, and that's how Anna felt.

'Hello, my love,' her husband came up behind her while she cooked, and wrapped his arms around her middle. 'I've missed you so much today,' he told her kissing the back of her neck. 'Whatever is the matter, Love?' Her face was pensive and her lips pursed.

'Oh nothing,' she managed a smile.

'Won't you give me a kiss?' he teased her, pulling her back to his chest and kissing her shoulder through the fabric of her dress. 'I saw the children playing outside...' he dragged his voice.

'John...stop,' she told him when she felt his desire beginning to grow between them. 'Not today.'

'Oh...' he didn't let go of her. 'Your cycle...'

'No...I'm just tired, that's all,' she sighed.

John rested his chin on her shoulder, nodding before kissing her there again. 'Alright but...I can still kiss you, can't I?'

Anna grinned sincerely. Her husband always managed to make her feel better even though he didn't try for it.

'You can always kiss me,' she said.

'That's all I wanted to hear.' He nuzzled his nose in her hair before telling her he loved her.

'How was work?' she asked as John sat down.

'Mr Charles didn't show up today...I only had two clients,' he sighed placing his earning on the table. 'I'm afraid he's got enough of my shoe shining.'

'Better. I don't want his charity anyway.'

'You sound like me when you talk like this,' he smiled.

'You are often right.' she replied.

'And how about your day?'

'Washed and taught the children their letters... that was all.'

Anna lied there. There was something else happening, something that she feared to tell him... For weeks now, someone had been watching Anna and she knew it. Maggie, the vicious woman, would eye her while she was doing the washing. Her shadow in the alley, looking straight at her. Her arms crossed around her middle and a hateful look on her face. Sometimes her lips would move but Anna never understood what she was saying. Maggie's eyes always locked on hers. Intimidating, menacing and haunting. And lately she had been in Anna's nightmares too. Whatever she was saying, it made feel Anna sick. Every time she caught a glimpse of that woman she would become almost dizzy.

'Are you sure?' Elsie asked her, days later.

'I am. I see her almost everyday, there, in the same spot.' Anna sat in Elsie's house, head down and dark circles under her eyes. She didn't want to tell her husband so she would share her worries with this trusted confident.

'And she moves her lips, you say?' Elsie had a thoughtful expression on her face.

'She does, as if...I don't know, as if she was talking to herself. It frightens me.' Anna brought her hand to her chest. 'I feel..sick every time.'

'Anna...' Elsie sat down and pursed her lips, thinking. 'Remember when you told me you thought you were expecting?'

'Yes,' Anna said sadly.

'Have you...been avoiding _it_?'

Anna took a deep breath. 'No. We haven't...actually, Mr Bates and I want it more than anything, but I suppose it's not going to happen.'

'Nonsense, my child. You've been married for less than an year, it takes time sometimes. Not every woman works the same.' The mother tried to sooth her daughter's worries, rubbing her back as she did so.

'I wish I would work like most of them. Like you, for example.' Anna looked up at her mother with realisation in her eyes. 'Can you see in my palm if it will happen?'

'Anna...'

'Please. Please, Elsie,' her daughter's eyes were wide, pleading.

'Alright, alright...let me see.' Elsie gave in and took Anna's right hand in hers.

'What is it?' Her mother's face was serious in deep thought, almost as if reading a book in the lines of her palm. She furrowed her brow then and looked up at Anna with an alarmed look.

'Don't worry my child...' she said, rising from her chair.

'Where are you going?' Anna asked. Her eyes nervous. 'Whatever is the matter?'

'Sooner than you think you are going to be holding your own babe in your arms.' Elsie said before leaving the house. 'I promise you.'

XXXXXX

'What do you think-' The former maid held her arm with all the strength she had in her, Maggie's skin beneath her fingers turning red.

'Listen here you vicious snake, you leave my daughter alone, do you hear me!' Elsie told her. Her eyes filled with rage.

'I don't know what you are talking about,' Maggie said back, trying to get away of Elsie's grasp.

'You've been cursing Anna, I know it, with that poisoned tongue of yours!' Elsie spat in fury.

'She deserves no better than a dry womb.' Maggie finally was able to free herself.

'All of this because John Bates always eyed you with no more than pity?' the mother said, provoking her.

'I'm in this miserable life because of him!'

'You filthy liar. He never used you, everyone knows it. Everyone knows you lied to get him stuck, but no one would ever believe you.' Elsie lifted her chin. 'John Bates would never be with a woman like you.'

'What about my child? Huh?!' Maggie told her with wide eyes.

'That child wasn't his you know that better than anyone else. Couldn't be...he would never even sit near you, much less give you a child.'

'Why don't you ask him then? Ask him! And he'll tell you that he did well more than sit by my side. Ask him!' Maggie shouted.

'Listen, here you wicked snake, if you go near them ever again I'll let everyone know what you are doing and they'll do worse than kill you.' Elsie closed in on her, trapping her between the wall and her body, and pointed her finger at her face. 'Leave my daughter alone.'

'Do they know you were a witch?' Maggie defied her.

'I was no witch. I was a mere gipsy. I've never harmed anyone. But I could...I know how to...more than you do.'

Elsie left her then, alone in the dark alley. Maggie would continue to try to ruin Anna's life but now that Elsie knew about it, her curses would be mere whispers in the chilly air. Lost with all the other words muttered. They would do Anna no harm...if in fact they ever did. Maybe Anna really just took a little more time than some women.

'How late are you?' Mrs Oliver asked two months later.

'Almost two months,' Anna answered.

'And have you been sick?'

'A little yes. In the morning mostly, but it lasts all day sometimes.' The young woman swallowed hard as she spoke. Today was a bad day again.

Mrs Oliver nodded. 'What about your breasts?' Anna looked over at Elsie, her cheeks red. 'Oh come on, let me take a look.'

The older woman waited while Anna began to unbutton the front of her dress after Elsie telling her that it was the only way to know, for sure. A woman like Mrs Oliver knew all about women's body and health. Probably more than she should. She delivered babies, helped women with their bodily problems and often she would perform other rather illicit acts. Everyone knew about it but no one commented. Sometimes women would go in and after they left Mrs Oliver would mutter some words towards the heavens above. '_One more angel for your keeping, My Lord.' _

She would often say she was a no more than a helper. A woman who had seen and done enough to know about everything. God would surely forgive her...

When Anna reached the last button, Mrs Oliver rose from her chair and walked towards her, reaching for her breasts and squeezing them tight. Anna winced in pain and her eyes were wide in shock.

'She's pregnant alright. Sure, she is,' the woman said towards Elsie, sitting back in her chair. 'You can tell your husband, girl, soon you'll have a crying babe at your breast.'

Anna eyes were teary now and her smile was bright. 'I'm going to tell him today!' she said to Elsie. What wonderful blessing! She now felt complete.

XXXXXX

William and Elsa were at the table, reading as best as they could, while George played on his bed with his sister's dolls.

'Soon you'll be learning too, George,' Anna said. Her joy was almost impossible to contain. Her smile had never been so wide and true and she felt so very happy at this moment. She had missed this feeling. For the past months it had been gone, and now she relished in the wonderful relief that was feeling this much of happiness within herself.

She eagerly waited for her husband. Soon he would be home and she would tell him about it the minute he passed through the door. She wouldn't be able to wait any longer than that. The children noticed her ecstatic uneasiness.

'Are you alright?' William asked.

'Oh yes, my dearest boy. I am more than alright,' she told him giggling.

'Dearest boy?' William twisted his nose before whispering to Elsa. 'I reckon something has happened, indeed.'

Anna shook her head with a lovingly smile. 'Alright, something has happened and I promise I will tell you all about it as soon as your father arrives home.'

'Must be something grand then!' as William said the words, John came through the door, looking crestfallen and in a bad mood.

'What's the matter?' Anna asked, worried about his state.

'Mrs Kent told me she doesn't want you to wash her clothes anymore. Money's short she said, they have to save.' he was mad. 'And last week you lost Mrs Manning as well.'

Anna's eyes fell to the floor. 'Do you think they aren't happy with my washing?' she asked him almost too afraid to hear the answer.

'It's not you, darling,' he sighed them, trying to ease her, 'They just don't want anyone washing for them anymore. But they still make tea parties in their yards. Mrs Manning got a laundry girl. And...I had one, one, client this week! It's getting worse and worse. There's far better shoe shiners in London. I was a cotton spinner not this...' he looked at his hands, almost on the verge of tears and then the words spilled from his mouth and he barely had the time to think or to stop them. 'Sometimes I think there's a reason we haven't a child yet...we can't. We just can't afford to have one more mouth to feed. Maybe,' he looked up and approached her, whispering so the children couldn't hear it, taking her hands in his. 'Maybe we should start avoiding it, at least until times are better...if they will ever be.'

Anna was speechless for a moment. A moment where the world around her crumbled into pieces. She avoided his eyes because she knew he would see her soul breaking. She didn't say a word because her voice would betray her. Was she able to manage a small fake smile? She grew up practicing enough for that.

'I'm sorry, my love,' he said, still holding her hands. 'You know how much I long for a child and I know you do too but it's not the right time. You are so young, we can wait,' he smiled at her and she did the same.

'Yes.' It was all she managed to say, and he leaned down to her to kiss her lovingly on the cheek.

She then resumed her lesson but of course the children were still waiting for that grand something to be told.

'What did you want to tell us then?' William asked, his eyes curious.

'Just...' Anna looked up at John and at the children again. Her head was aching, her throat was dry, her breathing wasn't helping her to think. 'Tomorrow I want to take them for a walk in the park,' she told her husband at last. 'After William's home.'

'Oh! That would be lovely, my sweet.' John approached her, kissing the top or her head. 'Am I invited?'

'Yes,' she said. 'You are always invited.' The painful smile returned, and her husband grinned.

The children were overjoyed but there was something about her…'Are you alright?' he asked. 'You're so pale, Anna. Did you eat today?'

She shook her head. 'I'm alright, just tired...maybe...I should go lay down for a while.'

'You do that love.' He kissed her hair again. 'You go and rest.'

She left them then, but John stared at the closed door of their room for a moment more. He knew her so well, and she was behaving...strange. Maybe she was just tired. Maybe it was nothing at all. That's what he hoped.

It wasn't his fault really, John didn't know how much he was hurting her, and she knew that. She forgave him, of course she did, but...she had his child growing inside her and he told her they should wait. How could they now? For once in her life courage was failing her. She didn't know how to tell him, and he was right. One more mouth to feed...how would they manage.? She still had the mendings with Elsie and two other ladies to wash clothes for but, that didn't even buy their soup for a week, and John's income was practically nothing now. But she was hurting. She could almost feel the baby inside her. It was absurd, yes, but maybe that was due to regret. Regret at not standing up for this little life that was forming.

But what would he say? Would he be mad? Would he be sad about it? Anna couldn't bear if he looked at her with regret in his eyes. '_You can't be pregnant, Anna! Not now! It's not the right time...' _Was history going to repeat itself? Would he ask her to...take care of it just like her father did to Elsie?

Oh, Anna. She should have known her husband better. And honestly, she did, but fear turns one blind. It blurs thoughts and perceptions and certainties. If she had told him that same night that she was expecting he would have showered her with kisses and words of love and dedication. He would have told her how happy she had made him and how sorry he was about what he said. He wasn't thinking. He was in a panic. They would manage.

_We'll sort it out, Anna. This baby will be so loved. Already is! I couldn't be happier. Maybe this is not the right moment but it's the moment we have and so we shall make it the happiest of our lives. _

Oh yes, all that and more, and he certainly would.

XXXXX

They were walking arm in arm in the park. Nasty looks were thrown over at them from fancier people and some whispered her name and her fall from the grand society to this life of misery. Still, it didn't matter to her. Her chin was up and she was proud of her choices...well, not the last one. She hadn't told John yet. Nor she would for now.

'Look at him,' she spoke at last, the sunny warm June breeze caressing their faces. 'William has grown up so fast...I can hardly believe he was no more than a baby when I met him...remember? In the factory?'

'When he stole that cotton?' John chuckled.

'Yes! He could barely speak back then...not two years ago. Or was it?' she tried to remember.

'Ah! He could speak all right. That devil.' He watched as the children ran in the grass ahead of them. 'That was only show...so you wouldn't tell Thomas about it. Only show.'

'Well, he caught me! I have to scold him about that one day,' she smiled. 'He's still working there...'

'Who?' he asked her.

'Thomas,' she said, her face twisting at his name. 'He shouldn't after what he did to you.'

'Nevermind that, one day he'll get what he deserves. I didn't forget that he almost killed me,' he sighed. 'But that only made you come to me, so...it wasn't all that bad.'

'Mr Bates! You almost died!'

'Well, but I didn't and look at us! Enjoying the sun on this beautiful afternoon. Almost makes one forget about their troubles,' he closed his eyes for a moment, savouring the warm breeze, missing the guilty expression in her face.

'Hasn't Charles been around today?'

'No...he's tired of me, I suppose. But then, I shined his shoes every day, they were more than clean!' he told her smiling.

'I wonder why he did it though...it is odd.'

They continued to walk. The grass green and the trees high and full, the birds sang and the swans swam in the lake. It was a beautiful day indeed, and if it wasn't for the secret that she was hiding, it would have been perfect.

'Anna, what's the matter?' he asked, when she leaned on his arm with a hand on her brow.

'I think...I'm too hot that's all.'

'You've been terribly pale for the last couple of days...' he said. 'Here, let's sit in the shade.'

'I'm alright, just too hot really.' They sat and he placed his hand on her head.

'Anna, have you been eating?'

'I have.'

'I don't want you to do anything stupid because of the times we are facing. We have enough for the five of us. Elsie helps too.'

'Please, John, don't worry. I am alright. I just need to sit for a little. Hold me.'

He nodded unsure and she leaned her body against his. The shade felt good and she heard the children laughing in the distance. She was tired and sick, and her stomach was turning inside her. If only she would have the courage to tell him...but she didn't want to add to his burdens, for now at least. Sooner than later she would have to let him know. It would take five days for John to hear it from someone else.

XXXXXX

'Hello there, John.' Mrs Oliver hollered in a cheery voice. 'Haven't seen you around for quite some time.'

'Been looking after a job...hard times Mrs Oliver.' He smiled at the older woman as he walked towards home.

'Wait, wait!' she called him. 'Here, take this to your girl, it will help with her sickness.' She handed him a few leaves of tea.

'Elsa's sick?' he asked, worried.

'Ah, not the little girl! Your wife, Anna.'

'Anna?' he was confused now. 'What's happened?!' He looked over to his house, his expression anxious.

'Oh, nothing happened, don't you worry. Men always make a big fuss about it. But don't you worry, a woman with child will feel sick for the first couple of months, at least! I was sick 'till my Ed was crying in my arms. That boy almost killed me, I tell you... Whatever is the matter, John?'

His face was white as a sheet and his sweat was now gathering at his brow. The words of the week before echoing in his mind. 'Is Anna with child?' he asked her. His voice steady and serious, Mrs Oliver turned the same expression as his.

'Well, yes...hasn't she told you?'

That's when he ran. Tea leaves forgotten in the old woman's hand. She rolled her eyes before going back to her house and John reached the door of his.

'Anna!' he called her and she came from the bedroom, alarmed by the sound of his voice.

'Whatever is the matter John?! You gave me a fright.' She brought her hand to her chest.

' Anna...' his eyes were teary and he walked towards her. 'I am so sorry.'

XXXXXX

Time is ticking. Running fast. Hours, days, months...they fly and while their life was happening someone else was making sure their future would be granted. He had only been a boy when it happened and he hadn't been able to thank him enough...but now...now he would. Charles Johnson would never forget the day John Bates saved his life.

* * *

_**Next Chapter:** Time is moving forward and John finally finds a decent job that promises to make their life a bit easier. Anna receives a letter from her father and she visits him in the factory but his proposal only makes things worse to her._

_**A/N:** E__xcerpt of the p__oem read by William: Sonnet 18 By William Shakespeare. _

**_Thank you for reading :D_**


	18. Chapter 18

_**A/N:** Good evening everyone! I hope you enjoy this update. Baby Bates is almost here :)_

_Hope you all have a good weekend! _

_**Disclaimer:** Same as chapter 1-17. _

* * *

_'Why didn't you tell me?' he whispered as she sat on their bed, head down and tears in her eyes. His hands came to hers and he sat besides her, caressing her knuckles gently. 'Why?'_

_She looked up at him and his eyes were tender, shining in the candlelight, ever so caring and adoring, trying to read the feelings that were written in her features. 'I...I didn't want you to worry even more,' she sniffed loudly. 'After what you said...I couldn't bear the thought that a child of ours would just add to your burden-'_

_He interrupted her then, squeezing her hands lightly. 'I would never, never think that our child would be a burden. How could you have believed such thing, Anna? After all the plans we made, after all the longing for this baby?'_

_'I didn't think, I was just scared.' She looked down at their hands. 'Scared that we wouldn't have enough, scared that you would be upset... tell me that it was not the right time.'_

_'Anna,' he sighed 'Maybe this is not the right moment but it's the moment we have and so we shall make it the happiest of our lives. In this life of ours a baby never comes at the right time … but that doesn't mean it's less loved. More sacrifices are to be made but love will never run out. Not ever. A table that fits for five it will fit for six. We just need to squeeze ourselves a bit more,' he smiled tenderly._

_'You're happy then?' She looked at him again, her eyes growing hopeful._

_'Oh yes, I am so happy...we're going to have a child, my love. Together.'_

_As soon as the words left his mouth she rested her head against his chest, taking in the steady rhythm of her husband's heartbeat. He could worry, he could fret and brood, but his arms around her were always strong and sure. Though he carried the weight of the world on his shoulders he always managed to make her feel protected and cherished. It came naturally to him. Every single one of us is born with a gift, and John Bates' was born emanating security, even if sometimes the last thing he felt was secure. As she leaned into his warm embrace she felt sheltered from every storm, and he felt happy, overjoyed, but confidant would be the last of his feelings. At least for now._

_'I could never have imagined how wonderful it would feel to know that the woman I love is carrying my child. I barely know the baby exists and I love it so much already,' he told her later that night when they were laying in bed. His hand caressed her still flat stomach as her head rested in the crook of his neck._

_'I'm sorry to keep it from you. I should have told you,' she said._

_'Do not worry about that now... We'll sort it out, Anna...just let me hold you close to me. We'll be fine.'_

XXXXXX

'Hurry up, William! You're going to be late!' John called his son while eating a piece of dry bread.

'Where are you going today?' Anna asked him, pouring some tea in his mug.

'I'll be giving some adverts away,' he said grimacing. 'Like if I were a child.'

'Don't you worry, something will turn up soon.' She kissed his cheek and that made him smile.

Time was passing by and Anna's belly grew bigger week after week. The baby had started kicking about one month ago, and she could no longer hide her state from prying eyes. It was November again, and she was six months along. She could hardly believe she had been living this life for two years now. Two very eventful years. The baby kicked again and she smiled at her bump, rubbing it gently, feeling the interaction between herself and that little piece of life inside her. Elsie sat across from her, knitting a tiny jacket with a contented smile on her face.

The children were growing before their eyes too. William still sold papers and now knew how to read as well as his father. Elsa was a good reader too, although she stammered a bit on longer words. Her sewing skills were improving and she now knew how to knit. George was just learning his first letters and he was not loving it. He was a difficult child to teach, he preferred to master the art of swearing and jumping walls and fences, at the moment.

For John work had only gotten worse. One day a few months ago, he took his polish box and sold it. He was now handing out adverts on the streets. Tuppence a week, less than his son. Elsie mended, Anna washed for two ladies, and all the money gathered was enough to make a pan of watery soup for the week and to buy a loaf of bread. Thankfully they had friends and William washed some storefronts now and then. That would usually give them extra potatoes or a sack of apples or oranges. Sometimes with any luck they would have a piece of cheese as well.

But Anna could see the shame in her husband's eyes as he swallowed his soup or ate his dry piece of bread. He saved it for her most of the time, telling her he wasn't that hungry and she should eat better now. And she would nod and accept his sacrifice. She knew that made him feel a little better. She knew she would do exactly the same. That was his way of caring for her and their child, and she would take it, even if every bit of his bread she ate dug a painful hole inside her heart.

'Anna!' the sound of her husband's voice shook her from her thoughts. 'Anna!' he pulled her out of the chair and hugged her lifting her from the floor.

'Careful, Mr Bates!' she squealed in his arms and he stepped away enough to look in her eyes while one of his hands caressed her belly.

'I've got a job!' he grinned. His breathing was still erratic, he must have run home to tell her the news. 'Half a crown a week, Anna. Half a crown!'

'Oh goodness! What job is this?' Anna asked him, her face lighting up with her husband's joy.

'Construction. I've got a place in the clock tower they are building. I saw Stephen, an old friend who worked in the factory with me, and he's working there for two months now, he told me that they were looking for strong men to carry bricks and mix cement and things like that. Hard work, but they pay well.'

'They pay well because it's dangerous. Some men have fallen and died.' Elsie commented, trying to finish the little jacket.

Anna uttered a sharp gasp and John rolled his eyes. 'I won't be working up there. I'll be staying in the ground. I asked.' He looked at his wife, trying to soothe her worry away.

'Are you sure?' she replied.

'Anna, I wouldn't lie to you, would I? I want to live to see this little one growing up. Don't worry, it's safe.' He shot Elsie a pointed look and the older woman looked down at her work, regretting her words.

'Half a crown?!' Anna smiled widely, her eyes watery.

'Every week, love. I'll be starting tomorrow at six and in a week's time we'll be able to cut up a chicken for a good soup.'

XXXXXX

'You shouldn't have mentioned it,' he told Elsie, sitting down and watching as she finished the last stitches on the little jacket that would belong to his child. 'She's been pestering me about it.'

'I know, but I am worried as well. Better less money and a husband than no husband at all,' the older woman said, raising her brow. She knew if they asked him to go up for extra work he would just to earn more for his family. That's exactly what she was trying to tell him.

'I won't go up there, I promised I wouldn't, even if they pay me extra for it,' he read her thoughts.

'Alright, alright...I hope you are wise...' she looked around the room. Anna was hanging some clothes outside, the children were running with their friends, the two of them were alone. 'There's something I need to ask. I should have done it before but...I never got 'round to it.'

'What is it?' He was curious.

'Maggie.' She looked at him.

'What about her?'

'She was doing the evil eye on Anna, months ago, before she found out she was with child.'

John furrowed his brow, his eyes worried and shocked. He listened attentively.

'Don't know if you believe it or not, but, in my view of this world those things are as deadly as the plague and she was doing it...luckily, she's no better at that than she is with her morals.' Elsie lifted one brow, 'It was easy to undo it.'

'She sent Sam to attack Anna as well, I know it,' he said furiously. 'Why does she hate her so much?!'

'Oh, you know why, John Bates.'

He looked at Elsie with uncertain eyes and licked his lips nervously. 'It's not Anna's fault that...'

'Is it true? That you... used and left her bearing a child on her own?'

'What?!' He rose from his chair and leaned towards her, his voice low. Anna couldn't hear this. Not even if it was just a filthy lie. 'That child wasn't mine Elsie. If it was, I would have never left her to deal with it on her own.'

Elsie pursed her lips, looking straight at him. 'You didn't deny the whole business.'

He looked to the window and saw Anna talking to some women outside. His hand came to his hair, before dragging it along his jaw. 'I didn't buy her services, Elsie. It was long before she was in that business...I don't even remember it. I was rotten drunk and when I woke up she was lying besides me...I don't even know if it really happened. But that child, that child wasn't mine. Whatever happened between us it was months before she got pregnant.'

'Why does she insist on it then?' Elsie asked confused.

'One night she came to me, and she told me I had ruined her...it wasn't the truth. I wasn't the first man she had had, I knew it, everyone knew it. You know it too. She told me I had to marry her, I said I wouldn't. I was twenty three, Elsie. I didn't want to marry, and, not her...I hadn't done anything wrong...'

'Who's the father of her child then? Does anyone know?'

'No one knows for sure but father used to say she had slept with a rich man once who had paid her for the child. I don't know about it. I don't even remember seeing that child around.'

'She gave it away right after he was born, Mrs Oliver helped her with the delivery. It was a boy. I asked. There was a woman there, no one knew who she was, and as soon as the baby was crying, she took it. Maggie disappeared some time after that to come back months later as a prostitute.'

'I do remember that. I think...she saw in me her salvation from a life of ruin and I didn't help her...I think that's why she hates me so much now.'

'It is strange, isn't it?' Elsie commented.

'What is it?'

'That woman who took her baby away...maybe your father was right. Maybe the father of her son was a rich man after all. In that factory pretty girls like her would always be watched with lustful eyes from their masters.'

'Mr Simon and his father.' John nodded.

'Yes...I know that myself.' Elsie rose her brow.

'Elsie...' his mind was working in mysterious ways now. 'How old was Anna when her brother was born?'

'She was five or six, why?' Elsie replied.

'Seventeen years ago,' John commented.

'Oh yes...I remember when Mrs Smith arrived from the country with the wee boy in her arms. She had gone up to their farm in Yorkshire until the baby was born. It was a tragedy when that boy died. Poor child. Sudden death they said...he was five.'

'Yes… Anna told me that,' he sighed. 'Elsie...can you please not mention anything of this to Anna...I don't want to-'

'Don't need to tell me that, John Bates. I wouldn't have my daughter suffer from lack of facts.'

'Lack of facts?'John questioned her.

'You may say all you want John, but it's your word against Maggie's. And even if no one believes her...there's always a little doubt in one's mind. A kind of feeling you don't know that's there until you are awake at night and it comes to you.'

'Yes...I know. Those unknown facts come to me sometimes, now more than ever since that happened to Anna. I wish I could remember that night, even if I did it, I wish I could remember it. It would be better than not knowing at all. But that child is not mine. That I am certain of.'

XXXXXX

'Pregnant?!' She brought her hands to her face in despair.

'What did you expect? She's married, isn't she?' Mr Smith had told his wife about the state of his daughter.

Amelia couldn't believe. Somehow this made everything more official. Carrying a child from that millworker would make the mouths of ladies and gentlemen even more bitter and judgemental. _'I've heard your daughter is expecting a little street rat.'_ _'Oh Amelia, it must be awful for you to know that your only child has actually been sharing a bed with...such people.'_ They wouldn't be one bit sorry about it. They wouldn't think it was awful. They wouldn't pity them. No. They would love it. Feed on it. Spread it like the black plague. They would just love it.

'I cannot believe that your daughter is carrying that...man's child. Don't you understand how disastrous that is?' The woman stood from her chaise longue, glaring furiously at her husband.

'Even more? How so?' he asked.

'People know her. People know who she is and they talk. Mr Smith's daughter married a mill worker. And soon they will say 'Mr Smith's daughter is carrying a little arab in her arms'.'

'Don't you call it that, Amelia. For goodness sake!' The man walked towards one of the windows and shook his head in disapproval.

'Oh! Has your heart gone soft for your darling grandchild now? That's what her child will be, a street arab! Nothing but a little rat just like its father.'

Simon sighed, annoyed.'That child is my grandchild, no matter who its father is,' he turned around to face her, and for a moment she was speechless.

'Have you gone mad?' she told him. Her brow furrowed in shock.

'She's my only child, Amelia. And the only one capable enough to give us an heir.'

'I don't want an heir from that -'

'No matter what you say, that baby is blood of my blood and … we have no one else Amelia. No one else.'

'I rather have no one else than them,' she shouted.

'You are too bitter to see before your eyes, woman!'

'How dare you? After everything that bastard did-'

'That bastard, as you called her, is my only child...and that baby she's carrying is my future. I made many mistakes in my life but I won't continue doing so.'

'Don't you tell me you are going to give them this house and the business, now! Will you sit for tea with your former employee and let him call you father? He's almost as old as you!'

'Of course not!'

'Well then?'

He turned to the window again and spoke slowly, enunciating every word cleary. He was tired of everything. A sick peace invaded him, the kind of peace you feel in the air before the biggest storm of the year erupts from the skies. 'This is all your fault, Amelia, if you really think about it. And how's Anna different than Edward?'

There were now tears forming in Amelia's eyes. 'Don't you dare -'

'I'm going to write a letter to Anna...' Simon interrupt his wife. 'I want to see her.'

'You won't be seeing her here!'

'No. I will tell her to go up to the factory. I have a proposal for her.'

'A proposal? May I know what that's about?'

'You may not. Now if you'll excuse me,' and Simon strode from the room without a backward glance.

XXXXXX

Charles Johnson crossed the road, holding his bowler onto his head. It was starting to rain and the air was chilly and windy. He saw the boy and ran faster to catch him.

'Boy! Come here, lad,' he shouted and William Bates stopped, looking back at the gentleman, frowning.

'You're too late for papers, sir. I'm going home,' the boy said.

'I don't want a paper, boy. Tell me, you are William Bates, aren't you?'

'That's me, sir.'

'Will you do me a favour? Can you give this to Anna?'

The boy looked at the envelope. 'From whom, sir? So I can tell her.'

'It's signed, she'll know...here,' the man took a shilling from his pocket. 'take it.'

'No, sir. Pa wouldn't like to know I accepted money for no job done.'

'I'm paying you to deliver that letter safe and sound to Anna. That's a job done, isn't it?'

William grinned then, his eyes mischievous. This gent knew his ways well enough. 'It's a job alright and with this rain I have to keep it dry and all.'

'Exactly. Now go. And take it straight to Anna.'

The boy nodded before leaving, running as fast as he could. If a fancy gent had payed him for such a job, he would do it with the most professional of attitudes. One more thing William Bates had taken after his father.

XXXXXXX

'Did you give it to the boy?' Simon asked.

'Yes, I did. Smart lad.'

The two men were going over some financial papers in Mr Smith's office. Charles was now his lawyer.

'Most likely takes after his father,' the older man commented.

'What will you do if she comes?' asked Charles.

Simon grimaced deep in thought.

'Mr Smith, with all due respect, don't you let your wife take what belongs to you. Anna is your daughter and the child she's expecting will carry your blood, and if that child is a boy, when you die he'll be your heir even if you don't want it.'

'I know. I know that.' Simon pursed his lips. 'But what if it's a girl?'

Charles gave the older man a serious look before nodding.

Simon Smith knew the answer to his question. The answer was John Bates, but it was yet too soon to form a proper thought about it. John Bates was still his rival. He was still the man who stole his only daughter away for a life of poverty and hardship. Although deep inside he knew that he was the one to blame for everything, and that guilt was born on the night he told Elsie Hughes he would marry her.

He had loved Elsie, but hated what she was. Poor, miserable, illiterate...he couldn't have someone like that by his side. He couldn't have someone like that connected to this so prideful business of his...well, destiny would indeed trick Simon Smith.

XXXXXX

'Does your husband know you are here?'

'Of course he does. We have no secrets between each other,' Anna told her father, one of her hands over her swollen stomach in a protective manner.

Simon motioned for her to sit down in a chair and she did so. She had no hat, nor gloves or a purse. Her dress was worn out and dark, but her golden hair up in a braid still adorned her face as before, with the small pin that her husband had given her for Christmas the year before. Anna looked down at her hands, her fingers moving nervously. The way her father stared at her was making her feel awkward, almost embarrassed. There was pity in his eyes and she hated it.

'How are you doing?' he broke the silence and she allowed herself to breathe again.

'Very well...as you can see.'

'Are you sure?' he said softly.

'We don't have expensive china or a cook, but I've never felt so loved in all my life. For me that's enough.'

'Anna...that child,' he sighed, gathering all the courage he could find within himself. 'That child is my grandchild and all I want is for him, or her, to have a good life.'

That made Anna look up at her father.

'I am ill, Anna. I have a… severe anaemia and it's not getting any better. That's why I called you. I want to have you by my side, I want that child to grow up among our kind.'

'Our kind?' she remarked, almost offended.

'Anna. You will travel up north until the baby is born and then, you can come back if you want, or you can stay there with your child. He will grow up in that nice farm in Yorkshire we have and he will go to a good school and maybe become a lawyer...'

'What are you saying?'

'Anna-'

'Are you suggesting that I have my child and leave it there for someone else to take care of? Is that what you are saying?' Anna hated herself in that moment, both for coming and for being unable to control her emotions, as her eyes filled with tears.

'I can't bear knowing that you are living in that nest of whores and vipers, Anna! You were not born for that sort of life.' His voice rose.

'I hope you are including my husband in that proposal of yours.'

He didn't say a word.

Anna drew herself up straighter and said indignantly, 'If you think I will trade my husband for jewels...you don't know me at all.'

'Not even knowing that that child of yours will always be no more than a slave? Fighting for a job to feed his family. Is that what you want for your child? A life of hunger and death? If you agree when you come back we can annul the marriage, claim that it was never...consummated. You weren't married by church, it will be easy.'

'Don't you dare to say another word! I am not leaving my husband. Not ever.' Anna was growing more upset by the minute.

'Think about it. It will be better for him too. Two less mouths to feed...if you stay that child will be the first of others...how much more can you take, Anna? How much more sacrifice? I will give him money-'

'When will you sacrifice yourself for me then? Accept my husband, give him a job, give us a house for your grandchildren to grow well. Help us. You are asking me about sacrifices but you know nothing about it. John is the best man you will ever meet, and you know it! You told me that once. He's respected, he's intelligent, he's trustworthy, so why can he be all that to others but not enough to me? I won't leave him… and don't you dare to make plans for my child's future. You won't take it from me like you did with Elsie. You won't!'

'But, Anna-'

'I thought you were different from her,' she rose from her chair, her tears sliding freely down her face. 'I am your daughter. Your real daughter...you have no excuse to be so unfair to me...You deserve each other. I hope you get better but...as a father, you are dead to me. I rather my children to live among rats than snakes.'

And she left, running down the stairs that lead from her father's office to the ground floor. She looked around and memories of the early days of her romance with John overflowed within her. This place would always be a curse and special at the same time. Mixed feelings are the worse to deal with. People were looking at her, but this time they weren't in awe of her dresses and pristine appearance. This time she was crying and she was one of them, and they looked because they knew exactly what was happening, and in that precise moment she missed her old life. That feeling wouldn't follow her home though, it would only last a matter of seconds. Her child moved inside her and she rubbed her belly lovingly, smiling. She would never go back, not for all the gold in the world.

When she stepped out of the factory, an icy wind caressed her features and she was glad for that. She took a deep breath but when she look ahead she saw her. Amelia Smith, coming in her direction. For a moment, Anna didn't know what to do, so she thought that it was better if she would just walk on and ignore that sickening presence.

'Did you accept your father's proposal? Mind you that I don't agree with it,' the woman told her.

'I am not for sale.' Anna said, rushing past her.

Amelia grabbed her by the arm then. 'He would pay your husband well if you did.'

'Let me go!' Anna tried to fight back.

'I should have drown you when you were a baby. They do it with cats and dogs...it's not much different than a rat, is it?' Her hand was heavy on Anna's arm.

'God's punished you already but you didn't learn anything from it. That's why Edward died...you would never love him. You don't love anyone. You just can't do it.'

'You don't know anything, Anna. That was no punishment at all.' Amelia's eyes grew wide and Anna felt sick. 'I hope your child doesn't thrive. You don't deserve it.'

'That's enough!' Charles separated Mrs Smith from Anna. 'Your husband won't like to know about this,' he told the older woman while he held Anna, who was trying to regain her normal breathing.

Mrs Smith was seething. 'You are a weak man, Charles.'

He turned his attention to Anna. 'Are you feeling well?'

'Take me home, please. I just want to go home,' Anna begged and he took her.

Her body was leaning against his and her feet gave way. Fortunately, Charles had his carriage near by and she didn't have to walk far. Amelia had caught her in a delicate state. If this confrontation had happened before Anna would have put up a fight, but in this condition...emotions controlled her life fully, and the vicious words that had spilled from that woman's mouth towards her child had shaken her. For a mother her child is almost a weakness. For Amelia that weakness was reputation, money, status... She would lose all of them before she died. Actually, the lack of them would be the death of her.

XXXXXX

'She will be alright. She needs to rest, eat well and above all, be at peace,' Mrs Oliver advised, washing her hands in the little bowl.

'What about the blood?' John asked, his hands holding Anna's right hand, as he sat on bed facing her.

'It happens...in my experience it's nothing to worry about. You are feeling the baby moving aren't you?' Mrs Oliver asked her.

'Yes I am,' Anna replied laying in bed. Her left hand resting over her belly. John immediately tried to feel the baby himself. He smiled.

'Don't you worry. You will be fine. Three more months and your babe will be crying day and night. You'll miss these days when you only felt it but didn't hear anything,' Mrs Oliver stated before leaving.

Anna and John smiled but they weren't so sure about it. Anna knew she would love to have her baby in her arms, crying or not. She couldn't wait to meet it. To see its features and to smell its baby smell.

'What happened, Anna? Elsie said Mr Charles brought you home. What did your father say?' He asked when they were finally alone. He knew he should have gone with her.

'It was horrible John,' she squeezed his hand. 'Horrible. He wanted to take me up north until the baby was born.' She started crying again. 'I would either leave the baby there or stay there and pretend to be dead. If I came back, he would annul our marriage. Tell everyone it was never consummated. He would give my life back if I gave my child to someone else to raise. He would give you money too, so you wouldn't go after me.'

'What?!' John was aghast.

'And..Mrs Smith said she hopes that our child won't thrive.' That's when she began to sob. The words too terrifying for her.

'Oh my love.' John close the distance between them and hugged her, kissing the top of her head as he did so. 'Don't you think about it. No one will ever break us apart and our baby will born beautiful and healthy.' He pulled away enough to look into her eyes. 'You will see. I promise you. No one will ever harm you again, remember that.'

Anna nodded before resting her head against his chest once again. His arms were around her body, soothing her and making her feel safe and loved, but his mind racing wild. His thoughts gathering. The voices in his head shouting in unison. He had heard that story before. Up north until the baby was born. Money exchanged. No one would know. That's what rich men do when they impregnate whom they shouldn't. Up north in their country houses in Yorkshire...hidden away from prying eyes. No one would see her pregnant. No one _had_ seen her pregnant...had Amelia Smith ever been seen carrying a child?

'You are safe now, Anna. Sshhh. It's alright my love.' The answer was no.

Three months go by so fast. Anna rested her head on her husband's chest that same night and it seemed that when she woke up it was already February.

John was working on the clock tower. Money wasn't that much but it was enough. Enough for them to buy second hand clothes for the children for Christmas. Enough to invite Thelma and her children for dinner once more. Her father had not tried to talk to her again, but Charles Johnson was still working for them, although they wouldn't know about it just yet. George knew how to write his name but that was about it. William was still a paper boy. Elsa was now almost a professional mender.

It was February the third of 1853. Anna awoke that morning with sharp pain making her sit up at once. Her husband was still sleeping because Thursdays were his mornings off and she tapped his shoulder gently.

'John...I think.'

He sat up when he saw the nervous look on her face, uncovering her from the sheets, his eyes growing large in exciting panic at the sight before him. Their child was ready to meet the world.

* * *

_**Next Chapter:** Anna and John's baby is born. William receives a special present from Anna that will awaken in him a new sort of passion. Charles continues to work in Anna and John's favour._

**_Thank you for reading :) _**


	19. Chapter 19

_**A/N:** So, I almost forgot to post the chapter tonight! Ooops! You can all thank Terriejane to remind me to do so. She always has my back for these things xD _

_Baby Bates is here, William will receive a nice gift from Anna and Bates, and Charles and Simon have an important conversation. _

Wish you all a grand weekend! :)

_**Disclaimer:** Same as chapter 1-18._

* * *

'What do you want? A boy or a girl?' Elsa asked William as they sat on the ground outside. The day was cloudy and windy and it would start raining soon, but that would never keep the children inside, and John didn't mind it one bit, not today. It was best that they were distracted.

'I don't really care about all that, you know?' William told his cousin, looking straight ahead. 'I already have a brother and a sister so whatever comes now...' the boy shrugged his shoulders. He should be working by now but today was a special day, he told himself. Mr Harry wouldn't sack him anyway, he was a good man and he had other children selling papers for him. He could spare him for one day, surely.

'You mean us?' Elsa asked, her expression eager.

'Course I mean you! Who else?!' William rolled his eyes.

The girl smiled over at her brother, but George was too busy playing with other children, and that smile was quick at dying on her lips. 'William...I miss my ma...' Elsa pouted, trying not to cry.

The boy grimaced unsure before wrapping one arm around her shoulders. 'Don't you cry Elsa. I know you do but...we have to thank our today blessings haven't we? Think about it...you are getting a new brother or sister too.' The girl nodded but her tears began to fall. 'Listen, do you think I don't miss my ma, Vera too? Because I do.'

'How?' She dragged her sleeve along her runny nose. 'You've never even seen her!'

'Well...I suppose...' William thought for a moment. 'Every babe knows its mother, see. We spend almost one year in their tummies...or one year...something like that...even if we never met them, there's always this lack of something in our heart. Something that will only soften if you give yourself to someone else.'

The girl listened with a confused look on her face.

'Listen, I'm not saying you should forget aunty Mary and pretend she never existed, but...if you give yourself to Anna, and love her like a real ma, you'll feel your heart settle in your chest. She will never replace your ma Mary but you can always have a second ma. It's the best you can do, Elsa.'

'But now...with her own baby, do you think Anna will forget about us?'

'Nonsense that! That's not Anna's way. She won't do with us what they did to her. You mark my words.'

William had always been wise for his age. An innocent wisdom that had came to him when he first cried in the world. He was right. Orphans always lack something, no matter what that is. There's always something missing in their heart, and for orphans like Elsa, who have known and remembered their parents, that something was sometimes too much to bear. Humans have the need of someone there, someone motherly enough to calm their fears on stormy days, and if they don't have it they'll look for the next possible substitute. Elsa had not given herself entirely to Anna yet, her mother's presence was still too near, but she would learn. And with the arrival of this new baby, she would learn even faster. After all, daughters are their mother's little helpers.

XXXXXX

'Keep breathing, Anna. Breathe.' Elsie said wiping her brow with a cloth.

'She is almost ready,' Mrs Oliver told them, looking under Anna's dress.

'It's awful!' Anna cried, trying to sit up. 'This is horrible.'

'No, no, no, you lay back down, girl. What did you think?' Mrs Oliver pushed her back into the pillow. 'You would push once and your babe would come out flyin'?' she rolled her eyes.

'She's young, Mrs Oliver, it's her first child.' Elsie tried to excuse her daughter, but it was in vain.

'Had my first child when I was sixteen, now that's young! By the age of twenty three I had three of them already.'

Anna didn't hear the women talking. All she wanted now was the pain to stop. She knew childbirth wasn't easy but this was much worse than anything that she could ever imagined. Mrs Oliver stood from the bed, preparing a bowl of water and sheets.

'Elsie, will it take much longer?' Anna asked, sweat on her brow and her breathing erratic.

'You'll be ready in time for dinner. You'll see.' Mrs Oliver was the one to answer with a smile on her face. 'Now you don't fret. All that pain means your baby is eager to meet you.'

Her contractions had started around seven that morning and now around four hours later her body was ready for the hardest part.

'I want John here.' Anna moaned with another contraction. She had barely time to rest between them now.

'No, my darling girl. Men don't come in when I'm working. They only make things worse. But..if you want to see him one more time I can spare a few minutes. A few minutes only!'

'Yes, Mrs Oliver, I want to see him, please.' The young woman begged and her husband was in the room in a matter of seconds.

'Anna. How are you feeling, my love?' he smiled kneeling on the floor besides the bed and taking her hands in his.

'I'm feeling alright...I'm in pain but that's alright.' She smiled with teary eyes. 'Next time we see each other I'll have our baby in my arms.'

'I look forward to it...very, very much.' He kissed her forehead. 'I love you, Anna...don't … ' he didn't want to cry. Not now, not here but, memories often invade in the worst possible of times. 'Don't you go anywhere I can't go.'

'I will be fine, John...I won't leave you. Ever.' She shut her eyes close and gasped as another contraction was felt and John couldn't help but feel nervous and scared. His eyes were wide and his expression mimicked Anna's pain. One of his hands was now on her belly, as if caressing her there would make everything better.

'John...you have to go now,' Elsie told him, tapping his shoulder gently and he nodded.

'You be as strong as you always are, my love.' He caressed her cheek before kissing her temple and leaving the room. He would wait in the front room for almost an hour, until the cries of his baby were heard.

'Anna, you can push now. Come on,' Mrs Oliver commanded.

Elsie was at Anna's side, drying her brow and whispering words of encouragement.

'Come on, my darling girl,' she whispered. 'Help your baby. Help your baby, Anna.'

Anna did not cry out, therefore John did not hear her. He was more than worried now, walking back and forth, praying to everything and nothing, begging for his wife and child to come out safe and sound from this. This, the time that men feel the most useless. He sat then, his hands covering his face, tapping his foot on the floor without even noticing it. He remembered when William was born. It was a warm night with full moon, and Vera had been in pain for almost two days. Mrs Oliver had come from that same bedroom where Anna was now and she had told him that the baby wasn't in the right position.

'_The baby didn't turn...its on its feet. I'm telling you now that...you shouldn't have much hope, John.'_

His world had shattered before him that night. A painful guilt invading him. A guilt that would follow him all his life. He had never loved Vera but he had cried for her, cried for his motherless child. And that's what he feared now. If something bad happened to Anna he wouldn't be capable of keep living. He would die right then and there in the same chair he was seated now. He couldn't bear it, he didn't want to.

With every second he glanced towards the door and hoped that it wouldn't open. If that door opened before a cry was heard...no. That door would have to remain shut until his baby was crying. He could hear muffled words and heavy breathings but nothing else. What was happening?

Anna moaned and clenched her jaw tight. Her face was red and the veins in her neck were visible. With each intake of breath her nostrils dilated but she did not scream. She followed every command and she never said she was tired. All she wanted was to see her baby, to hold it in her arms, to see her husband's face as she told him whether it was a boy or a girl. Those thoughts gave her strength. A kind of strength she didn't know existed, and she understood in that moment why women put themselves under so much pain, and in most cases more than once. She was happy. In pain, but ever so happy. She had the man she loved, a loving family and now her baby of her own.

XXXXXX

He couldn't believe his eyes.

Anna's hair was damp and her face was stained with blood from kissing their baby as soon as Mrs Oliver placed it in her arms. Her smile was wide and joyful, and he felt like crying at the sight as she touched their child's little nose. She was talking, chuckling, telling the baby how much she loved it and that's when he walked towards the bed, sitting down facing them.

John didn't say a word. He looked down at the bundle in her arms and he could only smile between tears. He touched its cheek and the baby yawned, making him chuckle. He looked at Anna then and she was smiling widely at him.

'Do you want to hold your daughter?' She broke the silence.

He let out a dry sob as the words left her mouth. 'Yes,' he said, his hand caressing his daughter's as the girl tried to grab his finger. 'I want to hold her.'

The baby settled in his arms immediately, her eyes wide open and her hands closed. 'A girl.' he whispered.

'A boy and a girl, you are a lucky man, John,' Mrs Oliver said, looking at them.

'Oh yes...the luckiest.' He kissed his daughter's forehead. 'She's perfect.'

'Mary.' Anna said. 'I want to call her Mary.'

John nodded before placing a kiss on his wife's temple. 'I love you.'

'And I love you.'

Mary Bates had dark and thin hair. Her features were still too young to be comparable but no one dared to contradict Mrs Oliver. As soon as she saw the baby she said the little girl was the spitting image of John Bates when he was born.

'I helped my mother, may her soul be resting in eternal peace, to deliver that man.' She pointed towards John as she folded the stained sheets. 'I was only seventeen, he was my first delivery. Big boy he was, crying as loud as your ears could take, just like that little one. Dark hair and all.'

Anna looked up at John and smiled happily. She was overjoyed. Her husband couldn't keep his eyes off their daughter, admiring her every single detail, tears slipping down his cheeks, words failing him.

'She doesn't look like Anna, that's for sure,' Elsie remarked. 'She was the littlest thing when she was born. Not a hair on her head. I was afraid to hold her because she was so small,' she remembered with longing eyes.

'Now, let's go all of you...she needs to rest,' Mrs Oliver commanded.

'I'll stay,' John said. 'I won't make a noise,' he promised and the two older women left the room.

'Isn't she beautiful, John?' Anna asked her husband, tracing the girl's cheek.

'She's the most beautiful thing...after you,' he smiled, kissing his wife's forehead. 'You sleep my love, you must be tired.'

'I am.' She shifted on her pillow, making herself comfortable.

'You make me the happiest man alive, Anna.' When he looked back at his wife, she was already sleeping, her heavy breathing giving away her tiredness. He smiled tenderly at the only person who had ever made him truly happy and he couldn't help but lean into her and kiss her sweaty hair. His daughter remained in his arms. Eyes open, serious expression in her face. Her fists were closed tight and she breathed calmly as she stared at her father. His girl emanated confidence and strength and oddly enough he felt safe with her in his arms. She was his daughter alright, and that was one of the strongest proofs.

XXXXXX

'You go in but you don't make any noise, alright? Anna and the baby need to rest,' Elsie advised the children who were now eager to meet their new baby sister.

'I'm going first,' William said. 'I'm the eldest, it's only fair!'

'Alright, alright,' Elsie smiled walking ahead, knocking on the door and opening it slightly. 'There's someone here who's ever so curious to see the baby.'

'Come in.' Anna smiled, the baby now in her arms. It was almost time for dinner now, Mrs Oliver had been right.

John was still sitting on the bed, admiring his wife and daughter, unable to leave them for fear he'd miss something. He had missed worked and he only hoped that they would forgive him this day tomorrow, and as soon as the children came into the room, he stood and gave them his place.

'Careful now,' he said. 'Don't be too rough.'

William immediately sat on his father's spot, looking at his sister with wide eyes. He would be the last one to speak.

'She's so sweet.' Elsa said grinning. 'What's her name?'

'Her name is Mary, darling.' John approached her, petting her hair gently. 'Just like your mama.'

'I like it,' the girl smiled and nodded in approval. 'I like it very much!'

'And you George, do you like it?' his uncle asked.

The younger boy was staring and with a shy smile on his face he nodded too. 'She's too small to play, isn't she?'

'She is...but one day, you'll all play together,' Anna told him and the boy's smile grew. He was always fond of new mates for his games.

'What about you William? Do you like her?' Anna asked a little nervous. The ever so chatty boy had been silent since he entered the room. His eyes were on the baby and his expression was hard to read. She looked up at John and he pursed his lips unsure.

'William?' his father tapped the boy's shoulder. 'Won't you answer?'

William looked at Anna then, with a serious expression on his face. 'I want to hold her.'

'Alright...why don't you sit here besides me?' Anna smiled, but John was still unsure.

'You be careful William, she's too small.'

'I'm seeing how small she is,' the boy said as he sat down and held out his arms. 'I won't drop her or anything.'

'Let him, John. He's going to be very good at this.' Anna looked up at him, smiling, and placed the baby in William's arms, telling him to pay special attention to the girl's head.

The boy rocked his sister slowly against his chest, smiling down at his sister with caring eyes. 'I love her,' he said, never taking his eyes from the little girl. 'And I won't boys treat her badly, being her big brother and all...I'll take care of her, I promise.' A promise he would keep until the last of his days.

XXXXXX

'A girl?'

'Yes. Mary Bates is her name. Same as his dead sister.'

Simon sat on his office chair, his heart jumping in his chest. 'I have a granddaughter,' he smiled.

'What will you do now?' Charles asked him.

'I don't know.' The older man brought one hand to his forehead. 'I have no idea, Charles! I don't want to die before settling everything but...I have no idea what to do.'

'Mr Smith...' Charles thought for a second before saying his next words. They would certainly take Simon Smith by surprise. 'You should make a will...in...John Bates' name.'

'What?!' the older man stood from his chair, a threatened look on his face.

'You know it's the only way. If you don't make a will your fortune, your factories, your farms, they'll go to your next of kin, and God knows who that is! But you are no Lord or Duke...you are a new businessman...if you make a will in someone else's name you won't have to worry about it. If you make it in John Bates' name you'll be doing it for your daughter. For your granddaughter.'

'You're mad, Charles! I can't leave my fortune to him. He's a millworker! He knows nothing but how to spin cotton.'

'But I do. I would help him. I would give him my services and be loyal to him.'

'Charles...you are a peculiar fellow, I must say.' Simon walked past him towards the landing outside his office, where he could see his employees working. Charles followed him. 'He married your promised bride, he destroyed your plans for a future you would have with her. You had to travel to India to put your thoughts in place...that baby...she would probably be your daughter if you had married and now you are telling me to leave everything I have to him? You do surprise me.'

Charles sighed. 'I am stepping on my honour, that's certain. On my heart too, but...I have plenty of reasons to do so and you would agree with me if I shared them. And I truly believe he's a respectable man. A man of principle, a man capable enough to learn the business and to be good at it. You will regret it if you don't do it.'

Simon shook his head in disbelief.

'Mr Smith, you should trust your daughter's instincts...Anna would never marry a man beneath her dignity.' The older man was now in shock. 'I do believe it's not the clothes that makes the man but what's inside his heart, and mind.'

'That's not how people see it.'

'Well...if he was rich they would see it like that.'

'And what about those reasons you have?' Simon asked facing him.

'I would rather not say...not before you make your decision. I want you to decide solely on your instincts and by what you think of him and not because of my own reasons. Those are mine and they should not interfere with this business.'

Simon nodded in agreement. 'You don't sound like a lawyer when you speak, Charles, but you are right.'

'I speak as your lawyer when I say you need to make a will to save your property from a distant cousin who you never saw in all your life. That you should leave your daughter well. Her family...to leave it to those who will take care of it. Because, if this...' he pointed before them. '...belongs to someone that someone is Anna.'

'I shall think about it, but for now...I need to ask you a favour.'

XXXXXX

'Come in, William.' Anna chuckled when she saw the boy peeking inside the room. 'You can come in whenever you want.'

'Yes...' the boy scratched his head walking towards her. 'Pa said to stop bothering you and the baby.'

'Nonsense. Your pa is just afraid she'll like you more than him.' Anna tweaked his nose. 'Go see her. Is she sleeping?'

The boy walked towards the little cot and looked inside. His sister was awake, her eyes wide open looking straight at him. He smiled.

'She's staring at me. She's a looker, I tell you. She'll like operas and the theatre. And people putting on a show on the street. She'll see everything and know everything.'

'Do you think so?'

'I'm sure about it. I'm a talker you see, and she's a looker. She'll see and I'll tell. Yes, that will be us.' William said enthusiastically.

'You know what that sounds like?' Anna told him and the boy looked back at her waiting for her answer. 'Journalists. She'll run in the street to see what's happening, she'll tell you, and you will write.'

'Oh yes! And I already sell papers and all...I could write and sell 'em.'

Anna gave a small laugh. Whatever they would be, she knew they would always been together. 'Now...why don't you bring her here?'

The boy gasped in excitement. 'May I, really?'

'Well, you are almost a man now...I'm sure you can manage, can't you?'

''Course I can!' Gently and slowly the boy held his sister in his arms, always remembering that the head needed a good support. It took him a few minutes to be able to take her out of the cot, making sure he was holding her well enough before walking to the bed where Anna was waiting. 'Am I doing good?'

'You are doing splendidly, William. In no time you'll be carrying her around with no trouble.'

Carefully, he placed the little girl in her mother's arms and he sat down on the bed beside them.

'Pa's afraid I'll drop her and she'll break. He told me.'

Anna couldn't help but chuckle. 'He just wants his children to be safe. All the four of them.'

William smiled.

'Now I know if I can't find you I should look here first.' John walked in the room grinning. 'William Bates' hiding place since his little sister was born.'

'Pa! I took her out of the cot myself and I walked all the way to the bed and I didn't drop her or break her, ask Anna. Right, Anna?'

'Indeed you did. You did a very good job.'

'See! I can carry her Pa.'

John glanced towards Anna with a serious look. 'She's not a toy, William. That's all you need to know.'

'I know she's not a toy,' the boy furrowed his brow. 'Toys don't cry and breathe and well...they are not real babies.'

His father rolled his eyes. William always had a last word to share before a conversation was over.

'John...give it now.' Anna pointed out, and John nodded knowingly.

'Here William.' John took a package from the wardrobe. 'From Anna and me.'

'Oh damn, is it my birthday?'

'No it's not your birthday, William, and watch your tongue.' John lifted one eyebrow at him in warning.

The boy could hardly control his excitement as he unwrapped his gift. 'Oh my!' he looked at Anna. 'A book?'

'A notebook,' she said. 'So you can practice your writing. Write about what you see and what you feel...you know? So when Mary is big enough to tell you what she sees you already have enough experience to report.' Anna winked.

'What's that?' John asked with a curious look on his face as he sat down on the bed next to his son.

'You'll have to tell you father about it,' Anna said.

'I will!' the boy couldn't take his eyes from his gift, as he felt his father kiss the crown of his head. Something in him had awoken. A desire he didn't know was there until now. His fingers began to itch and his mind flit from one idea to another. He wouldn't be a journalist. No! He would be a writer! He would be a storyteller. He would write about everything and nothing. All his spoken tales would end up in his books. And so William Bates the writer was born.

In years to come he would be famous for his stories, the tales of his childhood and his own imagination. In every book a dedication to his father and to his mother. John and Anna Bates.

_Without them and their encouragement my stories would never be published. All these words that I write are a tribute to everything that they taught me, to every lesson, kiss and reprimand. I love you, ma and pa. _

_W. Bates._

* * *

_**Next Chapter:** The birth of Mary Bates unleashes a series of events in everyone's lives. There's a strike in Mr Smith's factory, an unexpected visitor to the Bates' house and the unrevealing of two pasts and John Bates is the trigger to everything._

**_Thank you for reading! :D_**


	20. Chapter 20

**_A/N:_**_ Good evening everyone! Another chapter, and a very long one__. And with this one posted I think there's only two more to come. Not 100% sure yet. And this makes me sad because I love writing this fic! Oh well, we can't go on forever, can we? And that's exactly why I have some flashes into the future. Like so, you all know what life has in store for some characters without me having to write a million chapters. (which I would if I could) _

_I hope you enjoy and I wish you all a grand weekend! Thank you all for your support. It's always so good to read what you think about this story and what you guys think it will happen next. Thank you 3_

**_Disclaimer:_**_ Same as chapter 1-19_

* * *

_There was a woman dressed in black, whose face he could not see, in the corner of the room. A room he recognised but not because it was his own. He had been there before, but now he couldn't remember when and why or where that room was. Mrs Oliver was there too, doing what she used to do. A baby's cry was heard and the woman in black took it right away. There was no looking back, there was no mother holding a child, no goodbye or cries of despair. It was taken cleanly and the mother was glad for it. _

John woke at once, sitting up in bed, with sweat at his temples and his heart racing on his chest. His own child crying in the middle of the night. These dreams had been haunting him ever since Mary's birth and he didn't know why. Maybe because of her. Maybe his subconscious was working against him now that he was in this new phase of his life.

The nights have been tiring. Little Mary making sure her parents didn't sleep for long, and John having to go to work before six in the morning. He was happy though, expect for these stressful dreams that made him breathless and panicky.

'I am sorry, John...' he heard his wife whispering. 'She just can't sleep the whole night..' Anna took the baby from her cot and rocked it in her arms almost urgently. The darkness enveloping both mother and child.

'You don't have to be sorry,' he said, lighting up a candle on little stool that served as his nightstand. 'Babies don't sleep the whole night...it's normal.'

'But you have to go to work...you haven't been sleeping at all.'

'Don't worry about me, Anna. Now come here,' he smiled, patting the bed beside him. 'Bring her here, it'll be easier if she cries again.'

Anna did as he said and placed the baby between them; the feeling of her parents watching over her made Mary settle immediately.

'William is right,' John whispered, laying on his side to face his daughter, one elbow supporting his body as his other hand traced her cheek. 'She is a looker.'

Anna smiled at the sight. Mary was a month old now and even though she was yet so young, her eyes were already ever curious. She may have had little or no understanding of the world but it wasn't for lack of watching. She had thrive into a rounded baby, and Anna had been blessed with enough milk to feed her at the demanded times.

'Yes...I think she'll be smart, and curious about everything,' Anna remarked.

'I only make smart babies, Anna,' he smiled at his wife and she had to chuckle at his words.

'You are too sure of yourself, Mr Bates.'

'But look at her. Look at what we've made...it couldn't get more perfect than her...maybe that's why she took so long to come,' he said, taking the baby's hand and kissing it.

'I knew you would give me nothing but wonderful things. That's why I fell in love with you.'

John looked at Anna for a moment, his eyes full of passion and dedication but they grew sad too fast. Sad and disappointed. 'But I don't, do I? I mean...' he looked at his daughter again. 'I can't give you a good life...'

'I have a good life, John. A wonderful life.'

'What do they call extreme optimism?' he smiled.

'They call it making the best of things...and that's what I'm doing.'

'I don't deserve you.'

'You deserve everything you are getting, John. And more.'

He took a deep breath, taking in his wife's words. More and more he had learned how to take her compliments and believe them but some days were easier than others, but in the end, no matter what kind of day he was having, the sight of his Anna smiling at him and reassuring every single one of his doubts was enough to make him forget about all their troubles...at least for a moment. 'I think she's hungry,' he said, when Mary began to rub her tender lips against his hand.

'She's always hungry,' Anna replied, smiling lovingly at her daughter. 'Bless her.'

XXXXXX

'You have to eat well. You are feeding a baby now. You don't want to lose your milk.' Elsie advised as she place a mug of milk in the table.

'Of course not!' the younger mother shook her head while her baby suckled at her breast.

'Good because while you feed her there's no need for extra expenses. Goat's milk is not free, and not as good for the baby either!' The older woman returned to her chair, where she would be mending some clothes for the rest of the day.

'Don't worry, I know that… Was William fed goat's milk?' Anna asked curiously.

'Funny you ask because I was talking to my friend, Laura, yesterday and she told me she was William's wet nurse.' Elsie began to work. 'Her Jack was born one week before him and she fed him until he was six months or so.'

'Poor William...' she looked down at her Mary again. 'And Vera...they never shared moments like this.'

'But look at her.' Elsie smiled tearily. 'It seemed like it was only yesterday when you were at my breast and now you have a baby of your own. I couldn't be more blessed after such misery.'

'I understand why you did it now...I would have done the same if I were in your situation.' Anna told her watching her baby suckling on her breast so eagerly. 'I couldn't bear to be apart from her…not ever,' her hand coming to trace Mary's hairline.

'No matter what she'll do or be, you'll love her with all your heart until the last of your days...that's what being a mother is.'

Anna nodded smiling.

XXXXXX

'Look William, I'm holding Mary!' Elsa said excitedly as her cousin came through the front door. His work day finally over.

'You be careful not to drop and break her. Pa would give you a good smack for that.' William told her, raising his brow to make his point.

'Boys always think they know better.' Anna winked at Elsa and she giggled back. The girl tried her best to rock her little cousin in her arms as she sat in a chair beside Anna.

'You took your book with you, William!' Anna smiled widely when she saw the boy holding his notebook in his hands.

'I did...to report some of the things I see downtown...there's always a lot going on, you know.'

'And may I know what there was to report?'

William opened his notebook and cleared his throat before starting. 'Mr Harry shouted at Tim this morning because he hasn't shown up for a week. Papers are selling good but this bloody rain is not doing my business any justice. A gentleman fell on the road and a carriage nearly broke him in half. If the worst had happened I would had have a tale to tell at dinner time. I'm glad it didn't though, the gentleman was wearing a very nice coat, it would have been a shame to ruin it. That fancy gentleman popped 'round again and asked me about Anna and Mary. I told them they were good and he asked when pa would be at home...'

'What? What gentleman?' Anna stood immediately with a perplexed look on her face. The first gentleman who came to her mind was Simon Smith. That couldn't be good.

'That fancy gentleman...the one who asked me to deliver that letter for you that one time. I see him every day, he buys his paper and pays twice. I like him.'

_Charles?! _She thought. Now that was more than strange. 'What did you tell him? Did he ask anything else? William tell me everything.'

The boy scratched his head. 'I asked him why he wanted to know about my family's affairs, and he said he just wanted to know. I said, 'Tell me your reason and I shall answer your question, sir.' He laughed in my face and said he wanted to visit.'

'To visit?' Anna's eyes widened in shock.

'Yes. He said he had something to give to my little sister, and I thought that was nice from his part, because he seems rich enough for a good enough present, so I told him pa worked from six to six every day but Thursdays.' William looked from Elsa to Anna, his eyes growing worried as he saw Anna's despair. 'I did bad in telling him?'

'No...' the young mother shook her head. 'It's alright, William. That was a very good entry for today.' She managed a small smile and a pat on his hair before the taking Mary from Elsa's arms. She was trying her best not to look worried. 'You must be hungry...I'll put Mary in her cot and come back to make you something.'

'Yes...' William nodded, looking down at his writing. 'I thought it was good too...'

XXXXXX

'...and still...after all these years, after everything you've done. The endless working hours, a salary that can't feed your families...how are you suppose to live like this?! After everything, you still get out of bed every morning before the sun is out and work till the sun is out again...he doesn't listen. He never will until you show him that he needs you more than you need him!' John stood on a wooden crate above the enthusiastic crowd of men who were listening to his words.

'But John, we do need him! We need our jobs...the salary is not enough but it's the best we got,' one of the men spoke.

'Don't you see...you have the power here. Without you his business doesn't profit. He needs your hands to work. You need him yes, but he needs you more! He can't sack all of you, can he? What would he do after? It's not easy to hire people who know about cotton...ten years ago, maybe, but not anymore. Times are changing and you need to let him see that you are changing with it. If he wants you he'll have to give you rights! If you work so hard, you expect to at least be able to feed your families, to give your children a better future.'

Another man spoke up, 'He's right! If we go on strike what can Mr Smith do?! He just can't sack all of us, and he wouldn't do it. We need to show him he needs us for his business. That we are more important than half a crown a week! And I don't know about you but I don't want my children to have this miserable life of ours, I want them to go to school, and that's not possible if we have to put them to work so young to earn a little extra. Their children are not better than ours!' Everyone cheered in agreement.

'That's exactly it! A strike will show him...and if this one doesn't work, you'll go on strike every month...he'll get tired of it, the business will not render as well and he will think twice,' John declared.

'Yes!' the men shouted, flailing their fists in the air in agreement.

John smiled, pleased with himself and climbed down his box. He was sweating but this time it was a sign of excitement and enthusiasm. Men's spirits and voices shouted in unison that night. They wanted justice and they were going to have it one way or the other. He could hear them saying they would tell their wives and children that next week they would work two hours less and that made his blood run hot through his veins. He missed these meetings. Justice and the fight to reach it was a war he would gladly be part of. It made him feel alive. And even though he wasn't working in the factory anymore, he would happily speak and encourage these working men and women to fight for their rights.

His old friend, Lenny, had asked him to speak two nights ago.

They grew up together, shared games, sweethearts and dirty jokes, and Lenny knew too well the power behind John Bates' speeches. The amount of respect people cultivated towards him. It had always been like that really, since Jonathan Bates' day. The father had always been a respected member of their community. A wise man to whom others turned to for advice. He was a storyteller too, maybe that was something that ran in the Bates men's blood, but his stories were different ones. Old tellings from the Orient always ending up with a moral lesson. Everyone loved him. He never denied a helping hand and all that had passed to his son, and people knew it.

Now Lenny called John out of the crowd; it had been a long time since they had a proper conversation.

'You did a wonderful job!' he said, patting John on the back. 'I knew they would be eager to hear you. We've missed you.'

'There's no reason to be part of these as before, I'm not a millworker anymore.' John smiled, looking down at his shoes.

'But you are John Bates! You will always be our leader in justice,' his friend chuckled. 'Ma used to say your pa was a Moses sort of figure...you know how my ma was religious...I reckon if she was alive she would say the same about you.'

'Nonsense...' John grinned sadly. 'I'm no more than a shadow of what my father was,' he sighed looking up to the night sky. 'He was so much wiser, so much better.'

'He never dreamt in making such a fuss, and you are speaking for the second strike now...shouting words of justice and rightfulness, the men applauding, he would be proud, John.'

'I've made many mistakes that he would disapprove of,' John sighed.

'Listen John, who hasn't made mistakes that go against their fathers beliefs? Your son will be the same, his children too… that's life.' Lenny tried to cheered him up. 'Is this because of your wife?'

'My wife?' John looked at him curiously.

'You think he wouldn't approve you marrying her?'

'Not at all. He would have loved Anna. And she would have loved him…mother too.'

Lenny scratched his head. 'Then...you feel bad because you are talking against her father?'

John looked at his friend with unsure eyes. 'You know...I haven't even considered that before...I...I don't think of Mr Smith as her father.' He thought for a moment. 'They couldn't be more different.'

'She has Elsie's heart and soul. You wouldn't have married her otherwise. You are a lucky chump.' Lenny laughed and John joined him. 'She's beautiful and good and she has given you a daughter now...you work in that bloody clock tower and earn twice as we do...what are you complaining about, John? You were never a man of complaints.'

'It's not a complaint really, it's more...do you remember when Maggie was with child?'

''Course I do! That witch is the devil I tell you. Selling her child the way she did.' Lenny spat on the ground in scorning manner.

'It's true then.'

'Indeed. She told my Bella some rich man paid her well for the poor babe...all those years ago. You know Bella likes some talkin'...some people run from her when they see her...she talks to everyone even to those I tell her not to.' Lenny shook his head. 'How can one sell a child? It's beyond me,' he grimaced in disapproval. 'There was rumour the babe was yours, remember?'

'How could I forget such nonsense?' John sighed in annoyance.

'No one believed her. Everyone knows you would never use such a rag. Even men like us have principles.'

John smiled before clearing his throat. 'There's something I need to ask you though.'

'What's that.'

John lowered his voice, 'Samuel Mall.'

'What did that bastard do now?!'

XXXXXX

John arrived home late that night. Around one in the morning. These meetings always had a sort of party atmosphere. Men would gather afterwards, not to talk about rights and justice, but to drink cheap rum and eat some sausages. It was on a night like this that John had been drunk all those years ago...if only he had been able to control himself as he did now, but then, back in those days, he was younger, he didn't have a family to care for, a wife. He was a single man free of major responsibilities.

He opened the front door ever so slowly and walked in. The children were asleep, he could hear their breathing in the semi-darkness. George slept with his mouth opened, a trace of saliva sliding down onto his pillow. Elsa was facing the wall but he could see her arms around her beloved dolls. And finally he stretched out his neck to look at William in the top bunk, sleeping on his back, his hands under his head and soft, constant snorings escaping from his nose. John smiled then. For now everyone in his house was well and he felt a wonderful sensation of peace invading him. That's when he saw the candle light coming from his bedroom. He walked in.

'Anna?' he called as he opened the door and he saw Anna sitting in bed, rocking Mary to sleep.

'John,' she whispered, smiling.

'She's still awake?' he sat down besides her, before placing a soft kiss on her lips.

'She just ate.' Anna smiled down at her daughter while John tried his best to control the urge to kiss the baby's cheek. 'I'm trying to put her to sleep. You are so late.' Their voices were low in the middle of the night.

'I'm sorry, you know, when men gather it takes all night...it's been awhile since I last went to those meetings.'

'I know,' she nodded.

'I know that you probably don't approve but, I have to be true to myself and to what I believe.'

'John...I approve of justice. Just because...he's my father it doesn't mean he's right. I know better than anyone else how unfair he can be.' Anna sighed sadly.

'Sshhh...don't feel sad, love. Listen, tomorrow is my morning off so maybe, before I go to work, we can go to the market. What do you say? You haven't been out of this house since she was born.' His tentative hand caressed his daughter's cheek ever so lightly.

'I don't know...we can't take her, it's too crowded, she's too small for a market.' Anna shot him a pointed look before whispering. 'You are going to wake her up.'

'Elsie can stay with her,' he smiled.

'We can't take too long because I have to feed her.'

'No, love, just one or two hours. Hmm? We don't have to if you don't want, I mean...'

'No! I want to.' Anna smiled. ' It would do me good. And I have to buy soap. I have to start washing again.'

'Are you sure? Shouldn't you wait one or two weeks more?'

'I feel fine, John. It's been a month,' she shook her head lovingly. 'And then I'm tired of doing nothing all day.'

'Alright then...it's settled. Elsie will love to have Mary with her. Elsa and George too, but they only show up to eat,' he chuckled and kissed Anna's temple before rising from bed to do his washing. Slowly, he filled the bowl with water, trying his best not to make any noise as Anna placed the baby in the cot.

'There's something I need to tell you,' his wife walked towards him as he took his shirt and undershirt off, washing away a day's work off his face and hair. 'Charles talked to William today. He told him he wants to visit.'

He stilled his movements then, the water slipping down his neck and chest and Anna couldn't help but follow the drops with her eyes as they travelled down his hairy torso. 'What does he want from us now? I don't understand that man.'

'He was nice to me when I went to the factory...remember?'

'Too nice. You abandoned him at the altar because of me, Anna.' He turned to face her then. Her attention was now divided between their conversation and her husband's figure.

'Maybe he's trying to make amends after the way he treated me.'

'I hope it's just amends and good heart and not reconquest. He did say he loved you, well...'

'John Bates, you are such a silly man sometimes.' She approached him wrapping her arms around his middle, the droplets almost sizzling as they met her heated skin. 'Do you really think I would leave you for him? How many times must I say that you are the only man that I want.'

'I'm not saying you will but he may think that...' and then his speech was interrupted by her lips. The urgency of her kiss making him wonderfully dizzy.

'Well then,' she continued when they broke apart, his hands now around her waist pulling her to him. 'I will tell him not to think such nonsense if he comes.' She smiled feeling his lips nipping at the skin of her neck. 'But I won't close our door on him. If he hadn't helped me … maybe Mary wouldn't be here with us.'

'Goodness sake, Anna,' he looked at her, his eyes serious. 'Don't say that.'

'But it's true. He brought me in his carriage as fast as he could. He saved me from Mrs Smith. And...he paid you more than he should for a whole month.'

'Alright...alright. But he better not think that our table with set for tea every time he pleases to pay us a visit. This one time, Anna. That's all.'

She nodded then and kissed him again, his hands tightening his grip around her waist. There had been sometime now since they last made love, and neither were too please with the situation. They'd been urgent and passionate since the day they were married, the flame always burning, and these past few months of celibacy was making them feel as they felt before they were husband and wife. One month had passed since Mary was born and they both knew it was now time to try to get their love life back, but tonight wouldn't be the night for them. As his lips travelled down her neck to the top of her chest and his hardness became too predominant to hide, their daughter decided that it was time to put a stop to romance and her cries were once again heard in their room. Mary wouldn't sleep through the night for two more weeks.

XXXXXX

They arrived home before lunch, holding hands and seductive smiles, the streets empty at that time of the day. Their spirits were high and they had spent several occasions behind trees and around corners sharing a furtive kiss and tempting touches. Somehow they felt like sweethearts more than husband and wife and that would last an eternity. John felt young, a kind of young he had never experienced, probably because he had never felt such intensity of feelings before. If he met his younger self now and told him that he would love a woman so fiercely that every time she smiled he would feel like dying with joy; that every time she called his name he would feel like taking her in his arms and never letting go, for as long as he lived, younger John would tell him all that nonsense was no more than a pack of lies. Feelings don't leave one speechless nor breathless, they don't leave one unable to think...younger John couldn't be more wrong, and present day John was more than glad for that. He loved feeling so light and passionate and emotional at every little thing she did or said. There was no better sensation in the world.

But now, their eyes were fixed on little Elsa as she came running towards them from Elsie's house.

'You have a visitor!' the girl said breathless. 'Mr Charles Johnson.'

John looked over at Anna with a serious look on his face. 'He knew you would be here this morning,' she told him.

'He says he's here to visit, Mr and Mrs Bates and the baby.' Elsa replied to Anna's remark.

'Let's go in then.' John squeezed Anna's hand lightly and they both ventured into Elsie's house.

When they entered Charles was holding Mary himself, trying to distract the little girl with a silver rattle. Her eyes were now more alive than ever with the gentle clatter of the toy. Elsie was sitting facing him, smiling down at the baby.

'Anna!' Charles smiled when he saw them, remaining on his seat with the girl in his arms. 'Mr Bates...'

'Mr Charles.' John nodded acknowledging his presence. 'My son said you would come.'

'Oh yes, I was sure he was going to tell you.' Charles shook the rattle at the girl once again. 'I've brought a present for little Mary. Actually, three...one from to me Mary and...two from Mr Smith. One for you and another one for the baby.' he looked at Anna then, pointed towards two wrappings behind the door.

'From my father?' Anna asked surprised.

'If he's offering a carriage to Anna and my daughter, and money to me, you can go back and tell him neither of us is for sale.' John spat at the well dressed gentleman.

Charles sighed handing the baby to Elsie and standing from his chair. 'Mr Bates, Anna...Mr Smith is very sorry for what he said, you see...he knows no better.'

'No better than to torture his own daughter?' John replied again.

'I understand your revolt, Mr Bates, I would feel the same, actually, I do. I told him so. I told him it was very wrong of him to make such offer.'

'Did you really? You weren't so kind when you tried to force yourself to your future wife.' John clenched his jaw in fury and Charles looked at Anna with apologizing eyes.

'And if I live a thousand years I will never be sorry enough. I behaved very badly, I know that, and I shall never behave in such a manner towards anyone ever again.'

'What are you doing here, Charles?' Anna asked almost pleading.

'Your father sent me. He's very pleased to know that she's healthy and that you are well. I will go back to him with the news that his granddaughter is a beautiful girl. He will be happy to know that. And I've brought a silver rattle. It's good luck.' the lawyer smiled and John grimaced in annoyance.

'That's very kind of you,' Anna offered, walking towards Elsie and taking Mary in her arms. 'Thank you.'

'I think you know your father is severely ill,' Charles continued. 'He doesn't have much long to live, Anna. He wants to see his grandchild.'

'I thought he wanted to dispatch it, more like.' John furrowed his brow. 'If that's all-'

'If you must know,' the lawyer interrupted him. 'I am indeed trying my best to have your forgiveness...and to earn your sympathy, Mr Bates.'

'Really? And how will you do that?' John asked rather curious, dragging a chair and sitting. His wife and Elsie watching as the two men talked.

'Your daughter being a girl...well, the matters of inheritors is complicated...'

'Inheritors?!' John exclaimed in surprise.

'Yes...I am the family's lawyer now and as such I have to guarantee that the business goes to capable hands. To someone who will take care of it with as much effort as Mr Smith.'

'I don't understand,' Anna said, rocking Mary in her arms.

'If your daughter was boy, it would be settled. Your father didn't disown you, as your, I mean, as Mrs Smith wanted. I don't even think she knows about this.'

'He didn't?' Anna was in shock. She was sure they had burned out her name from every piece of paper they had.

'No, you are still his heir, but being a woman, and your daughter being...well, a daughter, the biggest tranche of the fortune will go to a man, someone from your family. A distant cousin maybe, that's how things are.'

'Wait a second.' John brought his hand up and thought for a moment before speaking. Words were something hard to put together at a time like this. 'Are you saying that Anna will inherit part of the fortune?'

'Not much...but some. Enough to buy you a house on a main street,' Charles affirmed.

'Oh my God...' Anna gasped baffled.

'But that's not all...if Mr Smith makes a will in your name,' he pointed towards John. 'Then you will inherit everything. He's a new rich man, he has no titles, such as Lord or Duke, therefore a will is all that takes for him to put who he wants in charge of his goods, upon his death, of course.'

'But why would he make a will in Mr Bates' name?' Anna tried to reason. 'He would never...'

'I've been persuading him to.' Everyone looked at him wide eyed now. 'Telling him it's the best way to assure-'

'Why would you do such thing? You don't owe me to be so benevolent.' John was incredulous.

'I see you really don't remember me, Mr Bates, and at first, I didn't remember you either...how could I have ever imagined that the man who stole my bride, so to speak, was the same man who saved my life.'

XXXXXX

_The group of thugs approached the young man. There must have been five or six, maybe seven, he couldn't really tell. He was only a seventeen year old who had come to the wrong side of London town. He was curious, excited about being there. Such streets had never been seen by his eyes. They were dirty and dark and cold and the cry of children echoed in its walls. _

'_Look at him! A fancy boy...wandering 'round our place,' one of the thugs spoke. 'Aren't the downtown streets enough for your likes, sir?' _

_The group of boys, apparently around his own age laughed in his face as they began to trap him against a brick wall. _

'_I was just...passing by.' The young man tried to excuse himself but the group didn't give him any chance._

'_What do we have here?' another one asked, grabbing him by the neck and checking his pockets as he tried the best to fight back. 'He's got money in his pockets, lads! This is our lucky day. What else do you have, sir?' _

_Everyone laughed and the sound of it made him sick to his stomach. Tears began to gathered at his eyes as the thugs circled him, shouting and spitting in his face. They took his jacket, hat and shoes, and they ripped his shirt off his body. _

'_Seems that in this state of undress they are just like us!' They continued to bully him until he was wearing nothing by his trousers, and that's when they decided it was better just to end him there. Punches followed, and he fell on the __ground__, and the vicious group of boys __drug him through the mud__. Desperation making him beg for them to kill him at once. That's when he heard a voice in the distance. A voice that stilled everyone's movements. A commanding voice that made his attackers to freeze in fear. _

'_You cowards!' the voice shouted and he heard the running steps on the pavement. 'What were you doing?' this man, older than them, kneeled down to him and touched his face before rising again to __confront_ _the group. 'What do you think you were doing?!' the man shouted again. _

'_He's the son of a rich man, Mr Bates...they don't treat us any better.' The one who spoke the first, tried to excuse himself now. 'They enslave us, that's what my pa says. They deserve no better.' _

'_Is that what you think, Ben? I don't see them beating us half to death...do you? Is this what you want them to think of us? That we're animals? That once they get in these streets they will face nothing but dangerous people like you?'_

'_I'm not dangerous-'_

'_You shut your filthy mouth, Ben. What's this then? __Doing __him a favour? Will your pa be proud once he hears what I have to tell him?'_

'_You won't tell him, Mr Bates. Will you?' Ben begged in fear. _

'_Oh...then. It isn't your pa who says that they enslave us? That they deserve nothing better? I thought he would be proud, to know that his eldest son, the pride of house was such a justice __seeker__. Actually, all your fathers...would they proud? Or will they be? Because if you think I am going to let this pass, I won't...this was an act of pure evilness, and I don't allow that here. Not in this community of ours.'_

'_It was only a joke.' _

'_A joke? Maybe one day someone will joke with you as much as you did with him...when that time comes you will know what's good to you. Now, get out of my sight!' _

_John Bates kneeled down again, and sat the young man against the wall. 'Are you alright, son? Lad, are you alright?'_

_The boy nodded. _

'_Come on. Let's go!' John lifted the boy and supported him against his shoulder. 'Where do you live? Who's your father?' _

'_Albert...Albert Johnson,' the lad stammered with great difficulty. _

'_The lawyer then...alright.' _

_XXXXXX_

In John Bates house, the boy drank some water and he was given an old shirt. He didn't remember too much after that, when he woke up next he was in his own bed with a doctor checking every inch of his body. The result had been a few broken ribs and a broken wrist, and until the obscene proposal of Mrs Smith's, he had almost forgotten about this man who saved him.

'Only when Mrs Smith sat me down and told me she wanted me to pay someone to...that's when I remembered who you were. I told her I could never pay anyone to take someone's life...much less yours. I didn't tell her that though. She doesn't know what you did.'

'How could I have forgotten about the Johnson boy?' John ran a hand along his jaw. 'Maybe because you were not the last rich gentleman wandering these streets and getting caught by people like them, unfortunately. As much as I hate to admit it, this is not a safe place to be, even more when you don't know its ways.'

Anna nodded in agreement.

'When I was in India I learned a lot about kindness and good will towards those who help you, and that's what I want to do. I want to help you. I want Mrs Bates to forgive me,' Charles smiled shyly at Anna, 'And I want to thank you for saving my life. I would have died that day if you hadn't show up. Please, Mr Bates, don't think an enemy of me,' the lawyer begged before continuing. 'I do have my conditions though.'

'Conditions?' John lifted his brow.

'If Mr Smith follows my advice I want to continue to be your lawyer and I want to help you with the running of the factory as I do now.'

John had to chuckle at that, shaking his head in pure disbelief.

'Did you tell this to my father?' Anna asked.

'He knows I have my reasons but I didn't tell him what they are. I want him to make his decision solely on his instincts.'

John then nodded smiling. 'That's an act of character, Mr Charles. You seem to be a decent man.'

'I hope I am,' Charles smiled back.

'And the shoe shining? What was that all about?'

'Actually...Mr Simon was behind that, until he fell too ill...he told me to stop seeing you, he needed me in the factory.'

The three of them sat together for a couple of hours, talking about past, present and future, and that's when Anna and John properly met the one man that would be loyal to them all his life. Charles Johnson would be the godfather of their last child and the supervisor of all their enterprises. One day, many years in the future, they would sit all together at Christmas and remember this day. The beginning of a new journey for all of them.

XXXXXX

Another day passed and there was one more thing that John had stuck behind his ear. One more mystery to be solved.

The day was darkening and he had decided that he would put everything on the clear today. He wouldn't go home without the truth in his hands. So he looked for her. In every corner and dark alley, in all the places he could think of, until he saw her leaning against a wall, her reddish dress giving away her frame against the stained bricks.

'Oh, look who's here. Looking for consolation?'

'Looking for the truth, Maggie. I want nothing else from you but the truth.' John went directly to the point. There was no time to be loose now.

'The truth?' she asked confused.

'I need to talk to you, seriously.'

'Only talk? I can do more than just that.' The vicious woman approached him, running her hand along his chest.

'Maggie, I am serious.' He took her arm and drug her with him into a dark corner, where he knew no one would see them.

'Oh my,' she laughed. 'Aren't you rough! Are you this violent with your wife?'

He sighed in annoyance at her words. 'Maggie! I am here to talk about your son.'

The woman stopped then, her evil smile dying on her lips. 'What about it?' she asked nervously.

'I know you sold him. I want to know to whom,' he demanded.

'Is that regret?'

'Regret?'

'Yes, when I needed you you turned your back at me. Do you regret it now?' she sneered.

John let go of her arm then. 'That child wasn't mine, Maggie, you know it.'

She looked down at her feet. 'I know nothing but that you are no better than any other man! Why did you come here? Is your Anna doubting your word, is that it?' Maggie spoke, her voice filled with venom.

'What?'

'Did Elsie tell her about it, did she?'

'Elsie is not a vicious snake like you. She doesn't spread poison around.'

'Oh so...do you think your Anna would mind if I told her you left me with child?'

'You won't say anything to Anna, or to anyone else! Listen,' he grabbed her arm again. 'I doubt something happened that night, I was too drunk to even move….but that's not my problem, I don't care if it happened or not. What I want to know is who the man was...it was Mr Smith wasn't it? Anna's father. That's why you hate her so much, isn't?' John noticed how her face twinged almost in pain as the words left his mouth. He was too close to the truth. 'That's why you sent Sam after her...she lived, she had her mother with her... he allowed Elsie to live with them...and now, now she has me. Is that isn't it? He just gave you money for your child and didn't look at you twice.'

'You know nothing, John Bates!' she yelled at him, freeing herself from his grip.

'I think I do...'

'Tell you what...I'll tell you everything I know but with one condition,' she began insinuating to him again. This woman only knew one way of persuasion. 'I know you wouldn't regret that. I know what men like the best.'

'You are mad if you think there's any chance...' he told her in disgust before she continued.

'Come on...don't be so proud. Men are weak creatures...Anna doesn't have to know, and if she does, I'm sure she would forgive you...' she sighed, her hand coming up to cup his face. 'I am sure I can please you way more than her...she doesn't know half the things I do.'

John grabbed her hand before she could touch him and in that moment he could only look at her sadly. 'I pity you, Maggie. For everything that you've been through...but mainly because you think that you know men. You don't. Not at all. Women like you...men come to you knowing what they will get. They pay you for that. It's a job. Now, to be a wife, there's so much more to it. Something you will never know.' He let go of her again, grimacing almost in disgust. 'I was not the first man you had, if you indeed had me... why didn't you put all this show on for someone else?'

Maggie didn't say a word about it. All she did was to face him with cold eyes. 'What if I tell your wife about us? What if I tell her about the son I had that it was yours?' she smiled wickedly then. Her eyes glistening with hatred.

'I sent them to Sam,' he told her. 'You probably know that. You sent him after my wife and I sent them after him...if you threaten my wife ever again, Maggie...I am not a violent man but I won't see you attacking Anna again and do nothing. I won't!'

'Are you threatening me?'

'Warning you, yes. I am. I want you far away from my wife. And to know the truth. Maggie,' John sighed desperately. 'We both know that child wasn't mine! No one believes you! Why do you keep claiming that?! Why?' he pleaded to her now. His patience coming to an end.

'You always turned me down. Always!' Tears began to gathered at her eyes then. At last this woman was able to show more than a cold heart. 'You never looked at me with eager eyes, not even once. Everyone else did but you. Why? And now...she has you, and she gave you a daughter. My son would be the heir of all that fortune and she threw it all away because of you! I am glad your child is a girl...you will die with nothing!' Her heart wasn't cold, but bitter. She sold her child and didn't think twice. She loved John but didn't wish him well. All she wanted was for people around her to be as rotten as she was. Maggie was no more than a selfish women with a wicked sense of justice.

'So it's true? Mr Smith was the father of your child.' John brought one hand to his mouth in shock. He was expecting this but now that it was being stated he couldn't believe it. It was too much to bear. Too much for Anna, for Elsie, for everyone. The Smiths were an even greater façade. So great that he didn't know where to start to understand what was happening.

Half sick, he left her behind. The need to gather his thoughts too urgent now. He had to tell everything to Anna. She needed to know that her dear brother was no more than an illegitimate child like herself. But before leaving, Maggie had one more truth to reveal.

'John...that night...it did happen. You were drunk, and yes, you could barely move but I did it all myself.' She smiled, pleased with this little victory. The only one she would have in all her life.

'Save that memory then, it's the best you can have from me.'

XXXXX

'Where were you?' Anna was waiting for him to come from work for almost two hours now. Worry had started building inside her as the day darkened into night outside, but now that she saw him, she took a deep breath and ran to him, throwing her arms around his neck. 'I was so worried.'

'I am sorry, love,' he said, wrapping his hands round her middle, but his voice gave away all his troubles to her. That and the tight grip of his arms and the way he buried his nose in her neck, trying to have her as close to him as possible. He needed this sort of support from her before he was able to be the one hugging his devastated crying wife against his chest. John knew that tonight, she would need him more than ever.

'What's the matter, John?'

'There's something I need to tell you. Two things actually.' he guided her to their room, after asking her about the children.

'They are playing outside, Mary is asleep...why? What is it?' She was uneasy now. Her husband's actions giving away the storm yet to come.

'Years ago...before Vera,' he sat on bed and pulled her with him. 'I got drunk one night, too drunk, I've never been so drunk in all my life...and, when I woke up Maggie was sleeping besides me. We...well, I don't remember a thing but she, she claims that something happened.' He cringed with every word as Anna listened attentively, her mouth half opened. 'I wanted to tell you because...I don't want her to poison you. I am afraid she would tell you just to plant doubt between us. It's something I am very ashamed of and it still haunts me to this day.'

There was a moment of silence between them and he felt like dying then and there, but gladly Anna spoke at last. 'You don't have to be ashamed...it was so many years ago. And you were drunk. She took advantage of that. She should be the one ashamed.'

His darling wife took his face in her hands, making him look at her. Her words healing him with a power that made his heart jump in his chest.

_How can someone be so loving and understanding. How can someone be so loved..._he thought. 'She's not one to feel such things,' he whispered then.

'You were not even married. There's no possibility of doubt between us. No matter what she would say I would only believe your word.' She smiled.

But John Bates couldn't manage a smile just yet. There was one more thing...the worse to come.

'There's one more thing...and this one is...it has to do with you.'

'What is it?' Anna asked.

'She had a child, you see, and she sold that child to a rich man, just after it was born.'

'Oh my!' Anna brought a hand to her mouth. 'Did she really? But...what does that has to do with me?' She was confused now.

That was it, her heart would break into a million pieces in the seconds to follow. He wished he could spare his wife but, there were no secrets between them, and not when those secrets included herself. 'She sold him to your father. Your brother...he was Maggie's child.'

The cards were all on the table now, on this warm evening in early March.

In the dusk, high above the buildings, a flock of birds circled as if the world of people was nothing but a mere buzzing scenery of lies and revealed truths. Their flight was a nervous song and dance that announced the approaching arrival of Spring, and for them that was all that matter.

Oh to be a bird and worry about nothing but singing. Anna had envied them sometimes, as she sat on the windowsill of her room in her once great house. The garden of her house filled with every sort of trees and bushes, inviting chattering animals to stay there until Autumn would come again. The same garden she used to play in when she was a little girl, her father watching her from afar. That father of hers who was nothing but a liar. That house that was so mighty and marvellous from the outside, but once inside she felt no more than a prisoner. She missed her window though, her room packed with dresses and headpieces, and a big fireplace facing her queen size bed. But what she truly missed the most was the library. In there she always found the comfort of other lives and worlds beyond her own. They had always been her shelter and a much bigger and more diverse window to others. In there, she dreamed of a charming prince in a shining castle, waiting for her to declare his love. In there, she dreamed of children, a pack of them, running around a beautiful sunny garden in mid July while she drank tea with the love of her life. Also in there, she would grow old, maybe ninety if she was lucky enough, and her prince would always be by her side to the last of her days. She would die with her family around her, loving, caring and happy that they got to share a lifetime with her.

All those dreams, she now thought, had kept her alive and believing, but they were nothing but a childish manner to escape from real life. She did have her prince, and indeed he was quite charming, just not in the way she always imagined.

Her prince was tall and broad and he wore worn out clothes. He was not blond or young and his skin didn't smell of roses. Her prince was a man, the most handsome man she had ever known. He smelled of work, cheap soap and tenderness. A smell that quickly had became her favourite of scents. She once had thought of him as a broken prince, an old time warrior like the ones she read about. They were never portrayed as lovers or tender men, but in real life that was proven wrong. In fact, John Bates was not a broken prince. A warrior yes, but he had never fallen from his place. Instead he would climb higher and higher and the warrior of justice for his people would become the master himself.

But for now, she cried. She had no books to escape to, but her husband's warm chest, always ready to support her in the worst of times. So for now, she cried.

* * *

**_Next Chapter: _**_ Mr Smith gets worse. Will he have the time to make the will in John's name before dying? _

**_Thank you for reading :)_**


	21. Chapter 21

_**A/N:** Good evening everyone! It's been so sad to write these last chapters, but also so much fun! It's so good to write how everything plays out and how things will end for every character. I hope you guys are enjoying this as much as I am :D _

_Wish you all have a great weekend! _

_**Disclaimer:** Same as chapter 1-20_

* * *

It had been a long night. Sleep had evaded both of them and the only thing that warmed Anna's heart were her husband's words and her baby daughter in her arms.

Many questions had been answered but Anna still had so many more to ask. _No wonder Mrs Smith was so bitter_, she had told John, _her life is a lie._

Her husband didn't love or respect her and she had to raise his illegitimate children. Maybe he even had more. Simon Smith had always been a man of many women, maybe in those dark alleys there were more of his own blood...and truth to be told...that was a real possibility.

Although one can never forget such revelations, time does heal. Time makes it seem less important, less painful, less present, and to those who's heart is big and kind, forgiveness is at a hand's reach, and in this case, at a reach of a visit on deathbed.

Anna would never forget this disappointment, but she would not allow her soul to be poisoned by it, and that would be a lesson she would teach all her children. If the feeling of revenge is all that you have left, then your soul is lost, to never be found again. Oddly enough, her wise and just husband would be the first to learn from her words.

But life does go on, and the next night, Anna, John and the children, gathered together around the big tub of water in the middle of the front room. The steam giving away how hot it was, and after a couple of more cold bowls thrown in, it was at the right temperature.

'Come on then,' John spoke, helping the children to undress while Anna prepared the towels to dry them off afterwards.

'If I recall correctly I took a bath last night.' William said taking off his underpants, his face twisting in disapproval.

'Indeed you did and you will take a bath tonight, and tomorrow and so on...' John replied.

'Why the need if I'll get dirty again tomorrow? Just like doing the bed! If I'll sleep on it again why the need? Why the need…' William shook his head while his father helped him into the tub.

'Listen, we don't have nice clothes and fancy hats and shoes...but we will at least show up at places with a clean face and clean hair. There's nothing worse than finding excuses not to follow the rules just because we live in this place. We shall give the better of ourselves no matter what, and people will look at us with different eyes if we smell of soap instead of sweat.' John explained.

Anna nodded in agreement while she helped Elsa and George join their cousin in the tub.

William had to agree with his father too, although he still didn't understand the need to make a bed. It's not like they have fancy visitors for tea! But children have a way of forgetting the things they hate as soon as they are entertained. That's what happened every night during bath time. William would fuss and tap his foot on the floor and rolled his eyes but in the end, when the water was splashing and everyone was laughing he was the one who loved it the most. Those little moments, that would happen so very often in this poor and old house, were what kept Anna from thinking in the past. She would even say that these people had healed her. That without them she would have grown old, bitter and sad.

And while she played with the children, throwing water at each one of them, her face red and her chest aching from laughter, almost like a child, John's heart settled in his chest. No trace of doubt invaded him in these moments. He was sure she was happy and loved and that she didn't regret being there. In these moments he loved her the most and he would promise to himself that those laughs would follow them until old age. His heart was settled but tight with devotion, and he could see the missing smiles of childhood trying to revive in her lips. Those smiles and laughs she had never felt the need to express when she was a child, would never leave her now. That was one of the things she would always say...that with this humble and difficult life she had learned how to smile and laugh as people should. Never she knew how good it felt to feel her ribs almost break in her chest and her breath almost completely gone, until she met John Bates, and while he watched her he knew, for he had never felt so complete and young and happy as in moments like this.

'Oh no!' Anna giggled. 'I'm afraid we woke up Mary.'

'I'll see to her.' John said, smiling. 'You scrub them, Anna. Scrub them hard.' He stood up winking, running his hand along his nephew's hair.

'Alright, I'll do it just like you do,' Anna told the children and their eyes turned big.

'I can scrub myself!' George said, taking the soap on his hands.

'Not your back and behind your ears, you don't.' Anna smiled. 'It's not that bad...come on...'

In the bedroom, John took Mary in his arms, rocking her back to sleep. He sat in bed, while the girl yawned and he began to feel tears gathering in his eyes. Their baby was growing so fast. Her blueish eyes read her father's face attentively, and her hands tried to grasp the air. He smiled then, placing his index finger between her chubby ones, and she grabbed onto it with extraordinary strength. From the front room, the sounds of complaints and splashing water were heard, and Mary became serious when she heard her mother's voice calling for him.

'You promise me you won't make such a big fuss for a bath when you are older...' John whispered kissing her forehead and the baby made a little sound. 'Yes? You are such a good girl...although, you should try to sleep all night you know...' he stood from bed and walked towards the door. 'Ma and pa would be very grateful to you.'

That was the first night Mary Bates slept and allowed her parents to rest as well. They were laying in bed, almost waiting for their child to start crying, as it was now tradition, but she never did, and their waiting turned into embraces and low moans of pleasure.

Urgent hands on flushed skin, fierce kisses and silent gasps. Rediscovering each other again after months of awful abstinence. There's nothing better than making love after sometime apart, and even though they had always been together, this was a sort of reunion for them. John had never been with the mother of his child before. Vera had died in childbirth, there were changes he wasn't expecting. Swollen breasts that would respond to his touches in a very impressive way, and even more impressive when he ran his lips along her nipples before taking one in his mouth. They chuckled then, cheeks turning red in almost embarrassment, but they were too comfortable with each other to take much time with awkwardness.

'I forgot,' he chuckled. 'I'll be careful.'

'Doesn't hurt...' Anna whispered biting her lower lip. 'It feels good.'

That was all it took for him to continued his ministrations. His wife would often surprise him, and he was already used to it happening in their marital bed. She had proven herself the lover he thought would never exist in a wife. He had heard so many tales throughout his younger years. Wives were naive and innocent and prude. But all these tales had been proven wrong to him, and although he would be content with whatever Anna was willing to do, he couldn't be happier for her wonderfully racy mind. Maybe that's where love played its bigger part...the want and need to pleasure one another in every possible ways.

Soon their bodies were moving together. His thrusts gentle and slow at first, giving her the time to feel comfortable as before. But Anna was always as eager as he was, and she wrapped her legs around his middle to persuade him. Her hands around his neck, caressing the hair she found there while he held her at her hips, as his lips ran along her jaw and neck, kissing every bit of her skin.

They had missed each other terribly in this way, and even though the possibility of a crying baby interrupting them was very much present in their mind at first, soon it was forgotten. Their passion and desire stronger than any uncomfortable feeling. That was the first time Mary Bates slept through the night, but they remained the night awake, loving each other until dawn.

XXXXXX

Six months later, there was a loud knock on the door in the evening. They were all having dinner. Elsie was there too, with her granddaughter in her arms, babbling nonsense to the little girl.

'Who is it?' John asked, rising from the chair after cleaning his lips with a napkin.

'It's Charles,' was the reply and by the sound of the lawyer's voice he wasn't bringing good news.

'What brings you here so late?' Anna asked him as he came in, her eyes wide in worry.

'Your father...he's dying.'

'I...' Anna brought one hand to her mouth. 'I never thought it would really happen, so fast.'

'He wants to see you, and your girl...Mr Bates too,' he looked up at John.

'Me?' John was surprised.

'He won't make it through the week.'

Anna shook her head. 'I'm not sure I want to go...What about Mrs Smith?'

'She's not in town. She's visiting her sister.'

'Aunty Helen...' Anna smiled. She was always fond of old aunty Helen. A spinster with a gift for gossip, but with a good heart.

'I think you should come.' Charles looked at the girl on Elsie's arms. 'He wants to see her...he doesn't want to die without meeting his grandchild.'

'He should have thought about it before,' John told him, and Charles nodded understanding.

XXXXXX

'Elsa? Can you hang these clothes for me, please?' Anna handed the girl a basket of wet clothing. 'On the second rope, these are from Mrs Hall.'

The girl nodded obediently with a smile on her face. Elsa had always been eager to help whenever she could and now that she had a sister she tried to be even more useful than ever.

'And you my darling?!' Anna lifted Mary from the ground where the girl had been seated, playing with soap and the water spilling from the fountain. 'Are you helping mama as well?!' The baby laughed happily and Anna kissed her chubby cheek.

Mary was now turning blonde, with blueish eyes, and her father's features. She was energetic and happy, always with a smile on her face. Her cries were rarely heard these days, but her eyes continued ever so focused on the world around her. Mary would turn serious sometimes though, taking in sounds and movements and watching attentively while the children play, and Anna was sure that that brooding personality of hers had been taken after her father.

As she cooed to the baby, admiring the way she was growing up so fast, she thought of her father. He was dying in his bed, alone, while he actually had a family. A daughter and a granddaughter. A family he himself drove away with ridiculous cruelty. Asking a loving mother to abandon her child...how could she ever forgive him?

'You should visit him...' her mother's voice pulled her from her thoughts. 'He is your father.'

'How can you say that after everything-'

'After everything he did to me?' Elsie continued. 'I forgive him of everything because in the end...he gave me the best thing I could possibly ask for.'

'And what's that?' Anna asked, tears gathering at her eyes while Mary looked from one to the other. The answer she already knew.

'You. He gave me you. And without him, our little Mary wouldn't be here. Anna...life is a string of happenings. If something happens or doesn't happen it will affect what is yet to come. All those lies, all those tears, they've brought you here.'

Anna looked at her baby and tighten her grip around her rounded frame.

'No matter how badly he behaved, and he did, he certainly did, he loves you, he just...he doesn't know any better. Take your child and your husband, and go say goodbye to him. You won't see him ever again.'

The young mother nodded, tears sliding down her cheeks. She had already forgiven her father, she just didn't know it yet. That was Anna. She always forgave, long before she even realised it. Only because for some people hatred never pierces their heart deep enough. Some people just know how to love.

XXXXXX

The two gifts Mr Smith had sent Anna and Mary had been two dresses. One for the mother and one for the child. For the mother, the dress was too fancy to wear around the house and she had saved it for a special occasion. Maybe to a walk in the park or to church, although they rarely had the time for that now. For the child, the dress had been too big when offered but now it fit perfectly.

Little Anna knew when she unwrapped these gifts that the special occasion for such attire would be visiting her father on his deathbed. It was almost like he already knew back then that he was going to die now. That Mary would be big enough to wear this dress and that Anna would want to appear presentable to see him.

'It fits wonderfully on her, John. Look!' Anna clapped her hands together, smiling down at the girl who was seated on their bed.

'She looks like a little lady,' John replied, sitting beside his daughter and caressing her cheek. 'Let's put on the bonnet, my sweet?'

The baby flailed her hands and giggled at her father as he tied the bonnet string under her chin. 'Perfect!'

'Why aren't you dressed yet?' Anna asked looking at him with confused eyes.

'I am dressed,' he said, running his hands over his shirt.

'John...' she rolled her eyes. 'I told you to wear your suit.'

'Anna...this is who I am, this is how I dress.'

'I just want you to look presenta-'

'Presentable?' He stood from bed facing her. 'I was in these clothes when you met me...'

'John, that's not what I meant.' She shot him a look and he took a deep breath, rather annoyed. 'I just want people to see that you can be a gentleman too. That you are as noble as they are.'

'I've always been a gentleman to you wearing these.'

'Alright, alright...' she walked towards him wrapping her arms around his neck. 'You can wear whatever you want.' she kissed his cheek. 'But please...don't say anything that... you know.'

'I won't say a word, I promise.' He kissed her back.

It had been a difficult task to convince John to visit Mr Smith. At first he had almost been offended by the idea, but Anna knew too well how to persuade him. It had taken a whole week for him to say yes. He didn't know what Mr Smith wanted from him or why he should humiliate himself like this, but for Anna he would do it. If it meant so much to her then, he would go. She had told him. _'If all you feel is revenge and anger, then they win. All those who tried to separate us, they win. Were they able to poison your soul to the point of no return?'_

John had shook his head and sighed. His hand on his brow and a weight on his shoulders._ 'I am not as good as you, love.'_

_'John...'_

_'No, it's alright. You are kind and good and forgiving for both of us.'_ he had smiled. _'And with all that you manage to make me as forgiving as yourself. I will go with you.'_

His wife impressed him, indeed, every single day, and he knew that if they were to live all their lives in the rookery, she would turn into someone like Mrs Oliver or his own father. Someone people would turn to in times of need and for advice. That was never to happen though...their lives there were just coming to an end.

XXXXXX

William looked out over the rooftop, that late summer's day, admiring the sights before him. Very often, he would see Anna and his father going up here but he never questioned it. The curiosity for this place never really bothered just until a few nights ago. Elsie had stayed with Mary while they came up here and William followed them in silence, like a thief in the night. There, the couple talked in whispers before kissing each other passionately and for the first time in the boy's life, he didn't twist his nose disgusted. He watched them only for a moment before leaving quietly. William had smiled himself to sleep that night, happy for the happiness of his father and mother. Happy that they were able to find each other, and happy for having Anna in his own life.

Now, he looked ahead and took in the city's rooftops. Indeed this was a great spot...the smoke from the chimneys, the weak sun that tried the shine his last rays of the day between dirty clouds. William knew every corner of that city, every alley and street, he had walked them since he knew how to walk himself. There, he felt almost as powerful as a king, with his kingdom before him.

'From London's rooftops...' he whispered. He knew all about its streets and what they looked like from there, so he took his notebook from his pocket and began to write. _'If there's something as unbelievably great as London's streets, that has to be its rooftops. How can something be so different in the same place but from another view? I've known these streets for long enough now and I know every chimney as well. I may have named some when boredom took the better of me, and I know to which house they belong to, once I'm walking around, but what amazes me the most is that, whenever I am down there or up here, I travel to a different place and time. Down there I am no more than a boy who sells papers for a living, up here, I feel like a mighty wingless bird with the propose of watching...'_

'Where were you?' Elsa asked when William came down to the front of their house.

'I was up in the skies,' the boy said gesturing, his book in one hand, his pencil in the other.

'All that writin' has been turning your brain into wee.'

'You know what, my dear cousin, I will be the good old William Bates I always am and I'll allow you to read a few words of my book.'

Else nodded excitedly and took the book in her hands. 'You are too sure of yourself!'

XXXXXX

Anna stood on the pavement facing the house where she had been raised. Her breathing was heavy and her body trembled on the inside. This house was almost strange to her now. It was grey and imposing, like a monument in the middle of a great garden. It seemed like one of those haunted houses where nature had taken the better of the brick walls. When she lived there, she thought she was happy...she knew nothing about life. She didn't know happiness at all, and now, she felt sick.

'Anna?' John called her with Mary in his arms. 'Are you alright?'

'Yes...' Anna swallowed her tears and put on a smile. 'Let's go in,' and she took one final deep breath before ringing the bell. 'Take off your cap,' she whispered to John while they waited for someone to open the door.

'I know,' he remarked. Mary was happily trying to grab the button of his shirt, unaware of the tension they felt.

'Miss Smith!' the butler answered the door, his eyes wide and his mouth half opened in shock.

'It's Mrs Bates now, Travis.' Anna smiled looking over at her husband. 'Mr Smith called us here.'

Travis looked at John from head to toe and to the girl in his arms before nodding. 'Come in, Mrs Bates, I'll let him know you are here.'

'I don't think he likes me,' John whispered to Anna and she shook her head lovingly.

They waited in the hall, a big room with a beautiful wooden floor partially covered by a rouge carpet, and a huge chandelier hanging from the painted ceiling. The light emanating from it almost too bright for John's eyes. There was also a fireplace, right in the centre.

'Are you alright?' John asked her again, as he saw his wife closing her eyes.

'Yes...' she opened them to look at him. 'It's just feel odd to be here now...' she managed a small smile before taking Mary's chubby hand to kiss it. 'I'm alright though, with my husband and daughter with me.'

'Please,' Travis interrupt. 'Follow me...Miss...I mean, Mrs Bates.'

They followed the butler up the grand stairs, and John took in every detail of the house where Anna had grown up. Every bit of wood was carved. The ceilings painted and walls covered with velvet wallpaper. Art hanging on the walls, and big windows.

He realised then the true immensity of what Anna had given up for him, and all he could do was to kiss his daughter's cheek. He was thankful his Anna had been so humble and brave. If she was more like her father, she would have never looked at him twice.

The butler nodded then and gestured them to enter in the bedroom. 'Mr Smith is waiting.'

Charles was at one corner of the room, and he smiled when he saw them. John nodded at him before looking around. The bedroom was so big it was almost overwhelming. It was bigger than their whole house. It had dark brown furniture in every corner, and heavy curtains that were now slightly opened. The air smelled of perfume and fire mixed with the scent of old clothes.

'Anna...' Simon whispered with difficulty, trying to sit up in bed. 'You came.'

'No, Father, lay still.' Anna ran to the bed, kneeling on the floor and facing her father, his hand immediately begging for hers.

'My darling girl.' He smiled at her, caressing her cheek with his free hand, his limbs almost too weak to do so. 'My beautiful darling girl. If only you could forgive me for everything I've ever done.'

Anna began to cry. 'I forgive you, Father...I forgive you.'

'You are so much better than I could ever been...you don't take after me on that...'

'I've brought Mary, Father,' she smiled. 'Do you want to see her?'

'Oh yes...I want to see your little girl.'

John walked towards them, and slowly he put Mary in Anna's arms.

'Oh goodness,' the weak man tried to sit up again. 'Bates help me, will you?'

John hesitated for a few seconds, looking at his wife with unsure eyes but soon he was helping his father in law to sit up in bed, holding him under his armpits and lifting him to rest his back against the headboard.

'Thank you,' Simon whispered and John nodded, trying his best to smile. He really didn't know what to do. 'Now, let me see her.'

Anna sat the girl on the bed beside her grandfather. 'She is seven months tomorrow,' she said.

'She's beautiful, so grown up,' the older man caressed the girl's head through her bonnet. 'You are both wearing the dresses I gave you.'

Anna nodded.

'She looks like a proper princess... Sit down, Bates,' he gestured and John sat on the edge of the bed. 'Life has taught me many lessons, too many...I hope you all can learn from them. Don't take anything for granted. Not even your children.'

'We won't...I assure you,' John said.

'You have every right to hate me but...' Simon coughed before continuing. 'In the end, I am glad my daughter found you. You make her happy. I would have accept you as a son if you happen to live in a big house...' he smiled tearily. 'I would have married Elsie if she was born in a rich family, but I was blinded by statues and appearance. I was raised believing that people like you were not people like me. I didn't follow my heart because I was blind with self importance...my daughter was so much braver than me... she did what I wanted to do but didn't have the courage to, and until this day,' he looked at Anna, 'I envy you...I envy your courage. You took after your mother, and... I'm glad for that. I am going to die in ignorance, but you my child...when you die... and I hope that will be in a very distant future, you will die wise and loved and happy.'

'Father...' Anna pleaded, tears running down her face.

'I should rest, I'm...too tired.' Simon closed his eyes leaning his head on the pillow. 'Maybe...you can visit me again soon...'

'We will father, we will visit you again.' Anna kissed his cheek and he whispered how dearly he loved her since the first moment he saw her in her mother's arms, and she answered back just the same. 'I love you, Father.'

XXXXXX

'It was very nice of you to come.' Charles accompanied them to the door. 'He hasn't signed the will yet.'

'I am not here for that. I'm happy with the life I have...' Anna told him, Mary now in her arms.

Charles sighed. 'I know you are not but these are important matters. He knows about the strike and he's sure Mr Bates was behind that.'

John walked ahead then, opening the front door himself. 'He's right...and as long as I live I'll fight for justice.'

Anna watched as her husband left. 'That's John Bates...and I agree with him.' She shrugged her shoulders. 'Have a good day. Tell me if...something happens.' She finally smiled before leaving, joining her husband outside the gates.

They arrived home just in time for dinner. Elsie was warming up the soup and was frying some corn on the stove.

William sat on his top bunk focused on his book, Elsa was at the table mending some socks Elsie had given her, and George was trying his best to control his appetite, whining how hungry he was after racing some friends and winning.

'Oh there you are!' Elsie greeted them. 'How was it?'

Anna smiled sadly and placed Mary in John's arms. 'I'll help you with dinner...he is really bad...'

While the women talked John sat at the table with the baby on his lap.

'Look, what's Elsa's doing? Mending William's stinky socks?' John teased the girl.

'Anna's washed them!' Elsa laughed. 'I'm practicing.'

'Are you really? Whatever for?'

'One day, I will make Mary a beautiful dress,' the older girl smiled over at her cousin, caressing her arm.

'Oh really?' John asked, quite impressed.

'Yes, I will be a seamstress. Elsie is teaching me.'

'That's very good...maybe when that day comes you can make me a proper suit.'

'Yes...' Elsa nodded focusing back in her task. 'I certainly will.'

As John watched her, he could see so much of her mother. His darling sister. He missed her so much but this little reminder of her helped him overcome his feelings. When Elsa became a woman, she would be the spitting image of her mother. Tall, slender and pale, dark eyes and hair. She would be beautiful, a young woman every boy would easily fancy, but most importantly, all her dreams would come true.

XXXXXX

'Mr Smith, you have to sign it...please...just sign it,' Charles begged as Simon gave his last breaths.

'Charles...I trust you.'

And just like that, Simon Smith body turned cold on his bed. The young lawyer froze as he saw the moment Simon's soul left his body. He had never seen anyone dying before him...he felt almost sick to his stomach.

In his hands, he held the will in John Bates' name. A will that would have no meaning without Smith's signature. A will that was nothing now. In rage he tore the paper into smithereens. Why didn't the old man signed the papers when he told him to?! Standing up, he told the butler about the death of his employee and told him to send a letter to Mrs Smith as soon as possible. Tomorrow he would go to Anna and tell her, and after that...he would have to find the new heir to the Smith's fortune.

_'Charles...I trust you.'_ Simon had told him. '_I trust you.' _

It didn't matter now.

* * *

_**Next Chapter:** In the mourning of Anna's father, they learn about the death of a dear friend from the rockery. Charles finds out that the heir to the Smith's fortune lives in America; a distant cousin who makes a life out of frauds and heavy drinking...not the ideal candidate to such a great responsibility. Will the Smith's fortune be lost in the hands of a drunken? _


	22. Chapter 22

_**A/N: **Good evening everyone! I can now safely say there's two more chapters (100% sure now) and an epilogue. I am so sad that this fic is coming to an end, and I hope you are all enjoying where I am going with this story :) _

_Thank you all for your reviews! _

_**Disclaimer: **Same as chapter 1-21_

* * *

'Isn't this nice?' Anna whispered in the middle of the night, as she enjoyed the feeling of his arms around her. Outside the rain was pouring and the city was sound asleep. September had yet one week to go, but winter seemed to have arrived strong and sure.

'I know of something even better than this,' he whispered back and she could feel him chuckle against her neck. They were naked under the sheets, limbs tangled and kisses on warm flushed skin. She hugged him closer to her and he sighed delighted. There was nothing better than the two of them, together, like this.

Her father had died a week ago, and since that time she had shed a good amount of tears for a man who only accepted who she truly was two days before he died. Now she couldn't help but think about the prospect of inheriting some of his money. It wouldn't be much, she knew, compared to everything else, but it would be enough for them to have a better life.

'I can't stop thinking about what Charles said...about us getting some money,' she told him a moment later.

John shifted in bed, bringing himself up to look in her eyes. 'Me too,' he said, although he hated to feel like that. It was her money after all, he shouldn't be thinking about it. He had no right.

'Do you really think we will get some?'

'If your father didn't disown you then...you will.'

Anna nodded, fiddling with that lock of hair that would always rebel against his will. No matter how many times he ran his hand through his hair, pulling it back, that piece would always fall over his brow. 'We will,' she shot him a look and he smiled.

'What will you do with it?' he asked.

'Oh well...we could join with Elsie's house, and the one above...make the house bigger and buy proper beds,' she chuckled, taking his face between her hands. 'And we could have a room just of our own, and I could buy you a new cap!'

John grinned down at her before kissing her fiercely. 'Women are indeed planning creatures. Father would always say that...but I can't believe you want to stay here.'

'What else? Buy a house somewhere and spending all our money just like that? No,' she shook her head. 'I want to save it for the children. I want them to go to school.'

John smiled pensively. His eyes telling her exactly what his thoughts were.

'Don't feel bad, John. It's our money. What's mine is yours.'

'I just wish I was the one giving it to you.'

'You can give me so many other things!' she kissed his cheek.

'Can I?'

'You said you knew of something even better...what's that Mr Bates?'

John smiled widely at her before winking and looking over to Mary's cot to make sure she was sleeping. 'Well...let me show you.'

XXXXXX

'I found the heir,' Charles told them as he sipped on his tea. His expression was a tired one, disappointed, his voice was low. Everyone sat around the table of their house, the children ran outside, and Mary was playing on the floor with a rag that Elsie had spared her from her mendings.

'Who is he?' Anna asked, sitting across from him.

'A drunken American with a dodgy past, who spends his life driving people into fraud and corruption,' the lawyer shook his head. 'The worse possible candidate.'

'That will be disastrous,' John commented. 'Are you sure he's the only one?'

'I am. I had a hard time looking for him until Mrs Smith told me of this cousin who travelled to America thirty years ago. Mr Brad Kent is his son.'

'I remember that cousin.' Anna said. 'He visited once when I was a girl...he didn't bring his son though.'

'I have gathered all the information about him so now, I just have to write to him. I wanted to tell you first. I also have to go to Mr Smith's office again and take a better look in all the papers. I didn't have time the last time I was there... I've been notified about new contracts and partnerships...maybe they are mistaken and I really hope so.'

'Why?' Anna asked confused.

'The associates are not very happy. Apparently, Mr Smith signed new contracts, that I don't know of, and when that happens there are deadlines of payment that need to be executed...if not, there's fines. And when those come bankruptcy is almost always certain.'

'Oh my!' she brought her hand to her mouth. 'What now? Do you think it's possible to revert it?'

'I have to check on everything tomorrow and see if that's really the case, if so, I have to try to persuade the associates to give more time until the heir arrives...I can't make the payments myself. I must say, if your father did all this without telling me, I am not sure he wanted his business to continue for much longer, either that or he really thought his days wouldn't be so few.'

The silence fell between them, and only Mary's little babbling could be heard, trying her best to crawl now, and to call her father's attention. John took her in his arms and the girl immediately tried to reach for his nose.

'Thank you for the tea,' Charles said rising from his chair with a defeated look on his face.

'Keep us informed, please.' Anna gave him a small smile and accompanied him to the door.

'I shall. You should be hearing from your part of the entail in a month or so...these things take some time.' He smiled back at her before walking away crestfallen.

John looked over at Anna then, as she sat back down and rested her forehead in her hand. She was tired and worried and her eyes were shut. He touched her shoulder gently, and she remained still.

'Anna...are you alright?' he asked.

'It's just sad to see such a thriving business being dragged into the mud like this...' she whispered looking at him. 'It's just unfair that everything my father and his father built will be lost to a drunk.'

'You wait before you mourn for something that's not yet lost,' Elsie said, rising from her chair.

'What do you mean?' Anna looked at her confused, but before she could be given an answer her mother was already through door, with the excuse of having some mending to do.

'She's right,' John said. 'Maybe it's not that bad...'

'Yes...who knows what the future will bring?' She managed a small smile at her husband and her daughter. 'I have some clothes to hang, and George and Elsa have to finish their lesson. William is with them.'

'I'll look after them, and I'll take her.' John told her rising from his chair 'They're probably playing outside.'

He looked for the children for a while, asking people if they had seen them. And yes, they had, but children run like rabbits and when they play as freely as these children, they run from place to place in seconds. Mary was a heavy baby, and although the evenings of September were chilly, he was sweating from walking back and forth.

'They must have hidden in some hole, those beggars...' he whispered between his teeth and Mary laughed in his arms. 'Oh! Do you think that's funny? You little chick.'

'Pa!' William's voice made him turn around. The urgency of the calling setting him on alert.

'William?' He saw his son running in his direction, with Elsa and George just behind him. 'I've been looking for you!'

'Pa!' the boy stopped on his tracks, leaning and placing his hands on his knees to rest. His breathing erratic. Elsa had been crying, George eyes were wide and scared.

'Whatever is the matter?' John asked worriedly.

'They took...' the boy swallowed hard trying to breathe. 'They took Tim and Ben!'

'What? What happened?'

'They took them,' Elsa sobbed, wrapping her arms around her uncle's legs. 'They pulled them into a carriage and took them.'

'Who's they? And where's Thelma?'

'The workhouse men, pa! Thelma's dead,' William said, his eyes red with tears.

In that moment, John didn't know what to do. He remained still for a second, taking in what his son had just said. The workhouse...there was nothing worse than that. Thelma dead? No. That was not possible. After a moment of thought, he gave a deep breath, took the children and went home. He would have to do something...but for now, he walked with his children, thinking how he would tell Anna the awful news.

XXXXXXX

'What!' Anna brought her hand to her mouth. 'What are you saying?'

'She's dead...' John bit his lips to suppress his tears. 'They found her...body yesterday. Her boys were there...and today they took them.'

'That's not possible,' Anna cried, sitting down on a chair. 'I talked to her two days ago. I can't believe it.'

John walked to her and kneeled before her, taking her hands in his. 'I am sorry.'

She shook her head, her tears rolling freely down her cheeks. 'What about her boys...what will happen to them now?'

'I'll try to do something...don't worry. I'll find where they are and...we will find a way.' He looked up at her and dried her tears with his thumbs. 'I promise.'

Anna nodded. 'I...I should go prepare dinner...' she said, trying her best to control herself. 'They must be starving.'

'I'll help you.' John smiled at her. The best thing to do in these occasions is to stick to routine. 'William, see to your sister will you? And George, Elsa, you have your letters to finish don't you?'

His niece nodded obediently, sitting down at the table and taking a pencil in her hands. 'George?' she called her brother who was standing next to the entrance door.

'I don't want to do my letters.' the boy said, frowning.

'George,' John sighed. 'do as I say.'

'No! I don't like letters,' the boy crossed his arms and pouted.

'George!' John raised his voice but his nephew didn't flinch, so Anna walked towards him.

'Come on, George...please. You have to learn letters.' She smiled at the boy, petting his hair, but before she could ask him twice he backed away from her, his eyes on his feet.

'No! I don't have to anything. You are not my ma!'

Everyone was silent after that. Even Mary stopped making her little noises as she felt the tension in the air. Anna looked at George with a hurt expression on her face, but she wouldn't break in front of him. She swallowed hard trying to find the words, but she was blanked.

'That is enough!' John broke the silence, approaching the boy and grabbing him by his arm. 'She's not your ma but she's your aunt, and you will not speak to her like this, young man. Sit down.' He sat the boy on a chair, his voice stern and tired. 'Apologise to Anna now.'

George looked at Anna with an embarrassed look. 'I'm sorry,' his voice a mere whisper and John grimaced at the child.

'You will stay there until I tell you otherwise, and you will do your letters,' he said and his nephew sighed heavily, joining his sister in their lesson.

'It's alright, John.' Anna walked towards the stove, trying to mask her disappoint. 'Don't be cross at him. It's been hard for them as well.'

'He can't talk to you like that, Anna. You've been more than a mother to him. It's not fair.'

John glanced at him one more time and George lowered his eyes to the paper again. Elsa was a little nervous in her seat, doing her best to perfect her handwriting. She thought that after her brother's behavior she should do good for both of them, maybe Anna wouldn't be so sad like. Before bed, she would slap his head and tell him how stupid he was. _'Anna loves us, you shouldn't say those things to her.'_

'Leave him, Elsa.' William would speak from his top bunk. _'He will regret it and he will be sorry, and Anna will forgive him. She already did.'_

Elsa would pull her tongue at her brother then, and jump on her bunk. That night George didn't sleep well at all. That night he couldn't wait for morning to come and to give Anna a hug and tell her he was really sorry.

George Crawley would eventually learn how to read and write, but he wouldn't be scholarly. He would be a man of the land, a hard worker, and he would always regret his rude words to Anna. He would never call her ma, but he would always love her as much as the others.

XXXXXX

'He didn't mean it. He's just trying to be a rebel.' John told her as she brushed her hair seated up on their bed. 'He's stubborn just like his mother.'

'I know...he hates the lessons,' Anna sighed. 'But I want him to know how to read and write. That's important.'

'And you are right, my darling...maybe I should be the one teaching him, if he's being too hard to handle.'

'No. I will do it. I can do it.'

'Don't you think it's too much? You take in washings, you have Mary who needs your attention all the time...and you are teaching Elsa and George. Not to mention when William arrives from work. I'm sure he pesters you,' John chuckled.

'He doesn't! William is my little friend, John. He's the most wonderful soul there is. And he's too clever. We talk about everything and nothing.'

'I reckon he takes after his father?' John teased her.

'His father is not quite as dramatic,' Anna smiled. 'Neither so dreamy.'

'Oh well, everyone has their flaws.'

'And so what if we have four children? Some women have eleven of them! Four is not that much if you think about it. And Elsie helps me a lot, and Elsa too. She sees after Mary while I wash and she helps me with the hanging. She's my little helper.'

'George's your little trouble then.'

'George is my little challenge, but I will conquer him. He will be reading soon enough. It's a promise!'

John smiled, before walking toward Mary's cot to watch as his daughter slept so peacefully. She had blonde curls at the top of her head now, but her features were still the same.

'And...you will find Thelma's boys won't you?' Anna asked him.

'I will, I promise you.' John caressed the girl's hair ever so gently and walked to the bed, joining Anna under the sheets.

'What about her funeral?'

'Anna...they took her body. There was no one to claim it...there's no funeral,' he told her with heavy sorrow. He would have claimed it if he knew...but she had died in a dark alley, from a cough and cold and weak bones. No one he knew had seen her, if so, they would have told him right away. It was some stranger, or so they said, and they took her just like that, with her boys crying and running after her lifeless body.

'Hug me,' Anna pleaded and he immediately wrapped his arms protectively around her. Even in death, poor people are unlucky.

Sleep came quickly that night. Sometimes mourning does that to you. You just want to sleep the troubles away, to dream and not rest your body and your soul. There was nothing more secure and peaceful than sleeping beside each other. Even if when in the middle of the night their bodies drifted apart, taking their own place in bed. Because they knew, that they were still there together. They knew that eventually, with turns and shifts they would touch and feel each other's warmth under the sheets. When John woke up that morning, Anna was sleeping with her back at him, and he dragged his body to hers again, just to linger for a few more moments with the feeling and the smell of her against him. That always gave him the courage he needed to face another day, and with a loving, gentle kiss on her cheek, he got out of bed and prepared for another day of work.

It was after seven o'clock that same morning when George waited for Anna to come from the bedroom. His cousin was working and his sister was still asleep. Right now was the best moment. So he waited, and a few minutes later Anna came, and she smiled at him when she saw the boy looking seriously at her.

'Are you alright, George?' she asked, but to her surprise, his answer wouldn't be a vocal one. He ran to her and wrapped his arms around her thighs, squeezing her tight against him.

'I'm sorry,' the boy sobbed against her dress. 'I didn't want to say it.'

'Oh, my darling,' she kneeled down and hugged him. 'It's alright, I know you didn't. It's alright.'

'You are my ma,' the boy said, now looking in her eyes. 'My second ma.'

Anna didn't say a word, or her voice would give in to a sob, so she cleaned the boy's tears with her hands, and kissed his forehead. 'Now you go dress yourself while I prepare you something to eat. And when I call you for your lesson you will come, won't you?'

George nodded smiling and did as she said, waking his sister in the meantime. To himself, he promised he would be the first one to come when Anna called for the lesson, even though he knew he would always hated it, but that promise was all in vain. Anna would call them only a few times more to learn their letters, for this sort of life was just coming to an end. An end that was now about to begin, as Charles walked back and forth in Simon's Smith office. Papers in hands and a frustrated look on his face. Sighing and shaking his head as he read every single one of them.

'Why didn't he tell me?' he whispered.

Many contracts signed, weeks before his death. New partnerships. Two new factories down South. What was he thinking? Why all these plans? Something in Charles' mind told him that Mr Smith did all this because deep inside he wanted to sign that damned will. But why didn't he do it? Why didn't he tell him something? Maybe Mrs Smith was the one to blame. Surely she wouldn't allow her husband to give everything they had to John Bates.

He sighed again, defeated, sitting down on his late employee's chair. He looked around and opened some drawers, and he found a photograph of Anna in one of them.

Charles smile at the sight of her. He remember seeing her in that dress once or twice. She was indeed beautiful...and he was glad that they were friends now. That after everything she was able to trust him still. John Bates too. Trust. He smiled. I trust you, had been Simon's last words. Words that came to nothing. He sighed again, sitting back in the chair. Resting his eyes for a few seconds wouldn't do any harm. He would have to write that letter later today, and he would have to gather these new partners and talk to them. Beg them to give him more time or maybe to undo the contracts without much damaged, but he doubted that.

Suddenly, there was a loud bang outside the office, and he heard Thomas yelling at someone…

'What...' something caught his attention then, a book on this mighty shelf that Mr Smith had in his office. A shelf with business books, and journals and all things connected to his work. But this book was different. And it wasn't there before. This book was brown and small, and the title on the spine was handwritten in a childish manner. _I Trust You._

Charles rose from his chair and walked towards it, his head slightly crooked as he read it. He took the book in his hands and opened it. _'I trust you father because you are my best friend.'_ In it a compilation of Anna's drawings and letters to her father when she was just a little girl. Little notes and dedications that made his heart sink in his chest. She loved her father so much and he could only accept her choices in his last days. He kept turning the pages, reading a few words at time when something fell to his feet. A piece of paper, folded in half, and he leaned down to reach for it. He rested the book on the desk and unfolded the paper in his hands.

_'Last Will and Testament of ... Simon Terrance Smith.'_

* * *

_**Next Chapter: **Life changes drastically for the Bateses when Charles reads the official will of Simon Smith. _

**_Thank you for reading :)_**


	23. Chapter 23

**_A/N: _**_Good evening everyone! Only one more chapter to go! And the epilogue of course__ ;) Enjoy! xXx _

**_Disclaimer: _**_Same as chapter 1-22_

* * *

_'I, Simon Terrance Smith, of the City of London, England, being sound of mind and disposing memory, do hereby make, publish and declare this to be my Last Will and Testament, hereby revoking, annulling and cancelling all Wills and Codicils by me heretofore made._

_I do hereby give, all my possessions and all decisions, without any limitation, to John William Bates, of Old Nichol Street Rookery, London, England.'_

Anna climbed up the stairs to her old room, her hands running along the handrail as memories of a past life overflowed her. It almost seemed that the life she had here once, hadn't been her life at all, but someone else's. A life she had been watching from afar, or reading in a book. And now she was returning, and once again as a mistress.

Her old room was exactly the same as she had left it. Dusty books on shelves, old dolls and hairpieces on her vanity table. The mirror in which she had seen her future without John, now showed her once again in black, but this time for another man. Her father. The man who gave her life, the man who lied to her, and now the man who gave them everything they could possibly imagine.

The window she much loved, now with spider webs and and the dusty trails of rain streaks. She looked outside then, to the great garden, and she saw her children running around. People peeked inside the gates from the street. _'What on earth are those beggars doing in such a mighty house?'_ they would think. Their eyes curious and their mind ready to strike on gossip and bad intentions. She would have to dress the children properly now, she thought.

'Anna?' Her husband's voice roused her from her thoughts, but she didn't turn to face him. Instead, she waited for him to approached her; maybe he would wrap his arms around her and make her feel at peace. 'How are you feeling?' he asked, doing as she had wished for.

'This is all so strange, isn't it?' she told him, sighing. Her hands coming to cup his arms as he tightened his grip around her. 'Returning to this house...with you. Living here as if I never left.'

'But you did leave.' He turned her in his arms to face him. 'You left for me and we lived together in that poor old house of ours, and we were so very happy, weren't we?' His eyes were kind and loving, and she felt like her whole world was there, looking back at her with a warmth that could soothe her for all eternity.

'We were,' she smiled.

'We can't forget all that we've learned, all that we've lived. Life is a stream of experiences and we should never forget it, not even the bad ones.' He kissed her forehead. 'We're here now, and we will continue to be happy. We know better than anyone that it's not money that makes one happy.'

'Or good,' she added and he smiled down at her. 'This was my room.'

'I thought so...' he looked around. 'It feels different from everything else.'

'Everything else?'

'It feels light...peaceful. It's bright...every other room is dark and gloomy.'

'Mother made everything dark and gloomy.' She furrowed her brow and he looked at her with a serious expression on his face. 'What?'

'You haven't call her that since you found out she wasn't your mother,' he said.

'Well….anyway,' she tried to escape from further enquiry. Not even Anna herself knew why she had called her that. Maybe being here had made her go back in time. 'This will be our room. Right?'

John looked at her. 'You decide.'

'No. I want you to decide with me. If you don't want to live here, we can go somewhere else.'

'No, Anna...I want to be where you want to be. And you are right, it's better for the children. The house is...' he looked around again, glancing through the window. 'Grand. They can have a room each, lots of space for them to play, and a beautiful garden...I want to be where you want to be,' he repeated, smiling.

She knew him too well, more so, than she knew herself. And she knew when his smile didn't quite reach his eyes, and mostly his soul. She smiled back, with the same insecurity as him, and he knew it too.

'Alright then, this will be our room,' she nodded decided, but her heart skipped in her chest and she thought of the last time she was here. No. They would make beautiful memories of this place, memories so happy that they would make her forget the times she was no more than a prisoner… and with those thoughts in mind, they moved from their old poor old house to this mighty castle, but even new memories would never make her feel at ease there, not ever.

XXXXXX

'I don't like this thing.' William fussed at the bow on his collar. 'I look like a pompous doll.'

'You can take it off,' Elsie said chuckling, as she helped him into his new jacket. 'You were the one who wanted to buy it.'

'I thought it was alright, all gentlemen use them...I thought I was gentleman enough as well.'

'And you are,' she told him. 'It's not a bow that makes a good man out of you.'

'Nor bloody shoes.'

'William! If your father hears you...' she rolled her eyes.

'So, you are our maid now?' Elsa asked, looking at herself in the mirror.

Elsie smiled. 'I am. Until you know how to dress yourself properly, that is, if you don't want a lady's maid, or in the boys case, a valet.'

'A valet?' George asked.

'A man to dress you when you are old enough,' she replied.

'A man dressing us when we are old enough?' William wrinkled his nose. 'Don't rich people know how to dress themselves?'

'I suppose they don't.' Elsie chuckled.

'I didn't know money made one dumb,' William remarked, quite surprised.

The older woman laughed at the boy's words. 'You are all ready now. Go down for breakfast. Anna and John must be waiting for you.'

'I am going down the handrail!' William said leaving the room, running.

'I am too!' Elsa ran after her cousin, followed by her brother.

'And me!'

'Goodness me...those children.' Elsie shook her head, smiling.

When the three of them entered the dining room, their mouths fell to the floor with the sight before them.

'Bloody hell! Is that all for us?!' William's eyes were wide with the amount of food. Some items he couldn't even name. It was not that much, compared to other grand houses, Anna knew too well about waste now, and that no one ever ate all the food that was cooked in houses like this, but for everyone else it was the biggest feast they had ever seen.

'William.' John shot him a look. 'Language please.'

'But pa! Look at all that!'

'But you are the ones we should be looking at!' Anna spoke. 'You are all quite the picture in your new clothes.'

'Elsie braided my hair with lace, Anna.' Elsa smiled happily as she sat down next to her. 'And my shoes have heels! Look!'

'I had a bow and all but I couldn't quite breathe.' William confessed. 'I do fancy the waistcoat.'

'And I like my socks! They aren't mended.' George added.

'And my hair is rather tamed. Look pa! Elsie brushed it with some sort of glue,' William continued.

John chuckled. 'It's pomade, son.'

While the children reported on their new attire, Elsie watched over them, at one corner of the room, smiling at their excitement, without noticing Anna's eyes on her.

'Elsie, sit down with us,' Anna invited smiling. Realisation running through her mind...her real mother had never sat at this table. Instead, she would vanish into her room, until she was called to fulfil her maid duties, to tend to a daughter whom she always called Miss.

'I couldn't,' the older woman looked at the table. 'I couldn't,' she shook her head almost embarrassed, as if being in this house sent her back to her former position.

'Why not? Elsie...sit down,' her daughter insisted.

'Anna...I have never-'

'This is my house now, Elsie, and I want you to sit with us, always. You are my mother, not my maid.'

There was a moment of difficult silence, but Elsie gave in, giving a small unsure smile before taking her place at the table. 'I do want to keep sleeping in my old room. I couldn't sleep anywhere else.'

'Alright, if that's what you want, but you are no servant here,' Anna said. Deep inside she felt sorrow for what this woman had been denied of.

'Where's Mr Travis?' Elsie asked.

'I dismissed him...we don't need him watching over us as we eat. I never liked that. He'll be answering the door and polishing the silver as always.'

'Silver! There is silver?' William couldn't take so much information at once. He was too excited about this new way of life. There were sofas, bookshelves and chandeliers...some things had names he didn't even know how to pronounce, things he didn't know existed. Rooms filled with books, carpets and massive paintings on the walls. 'Wait...is this fork silver? Oh my! Elsa, we are eating with silver.'

'Just imagine when we tell our friends about it!' Elsa said, her mouth half opened. 'Can we invite them here?'

'Of course you can...actually, Mary's first birthday is coming so, maybe then.' Anna smiled at the children as their eyes lightened up with her words.

'I am going to see if she's awake.' John excused himself from the table.

'Pa's not very pleased, is he?' William commented.

'He's just has a lot going on for him.' Anna tried to excuse her husband but everyone had already noticed how poorly he was acclimating to this new life of theirs. The difference between Anna and John is that she's a woman and he's a man, and women are so much better at pretending everything's well.

She found him later, admiring their daughter in her cot. His hand caressing her golden locks as he did so. A small smile spreading on his lips. The sight making Anna's heart tighten with emotion in her chest. Every father should dote their children just like John doted theirs.

'I was thinking about hiring a tutor for the children.' Anna broke the silence and he turned to face her.

'A tutor? Why?'

'They've never been to school, and what I taught them is not enough. They need to learn the basics first,' she explained.

'I see...'

Anna approached him then, as he continued to watch over their sleeping child. 'You look very dashing in that suit.' She caressed his cheek, trying to cheer him up.

'Not the suit you wanted me to buy though,' he smiled.

'Well, you were right. Those were too fancy. You don't need so many layers to look this handsome.'

John rolled his eyes lovingly, and turned taking her in his arms.

'But...your light has gone with those rags of yours...I wonder why?' she asked him, looking deep into his eyes, and she saw in there how much he was concealing from her.

'Anna...' he took a deep breath, his hands coming to hold her shoulders and she knew what he wanted to tell her was important. More than that, she wanted him to tell her...she needed to hear it. 'Am I your-' but before he could say another word, Elsie's voice interrupt them.

'Oh! I am sorry,' the older woman averted her eyes from the couple. 'Charles is here. He wants to speak to you.'

XXXXXX

'Did you find them?' John asked him.

'I did! They are in a workhouse in Rose Street,' Charles told them as he sat down on the sofa next to Anna. John was yet to use one of those as comfortably as everyone else. 'No workhouse is good, in my opinion but...that one is particularly harsh on children. An orphans house...they can take more advantage like so.'

'Poor darlings.' Anna shook her head. 'Can you take them out?'

'I can. What they want more than anything is to get rid of them. You can even be a criminal, they will let you take them...God knows how many children have disappeared and been poorly treated because of that.'

'Alright then, you take them out of there as soon as you can...' John said. 'I can't spare them all from that life, but those two...they will have a home.'

'I can do that this week. Do I bring them here? Are you going to take them?' the lawyer asked.

'No. Mrs Oliver will, I've talked to her about it. She's spent her life taking in children, she will be glad to do it again.'

'Will she? Seems rather odd. How will she support them?'

'We will pay her for that,' Anna explained. 'Help her with everything she needs.'

'Well, that sounds more like it.'

'Also...there's something I need to ask,' John began, rather unsure. 'I need you to...help me. I don't really know much about business, factories, accounts...and I am determined to learn and to be a fair employer.'

'That's why I am here, Mr Bates. But, first, we have to meet with the new partners, and try to come to a deal with them. They are not very happy with all the waiting, and I wasn't able to persuade them any further. It's been over two months...they want to cancel contracts and to be paid.'

John thought for a moment before speaking again. 'You settle the meetings...you and I are going to make them change their minds.'

XXXXXX

'Where's my cap, Anna?'

'Right there.' she pointed out from the bed. 'Have you gone blind now?'

'Not that one,' he sighed. 'My old one!'

'John...you are going to a meeting with your future associates, you can't wear that old ugly thing.'

He shot her a look. 'It's my lucky cap. You didn't throw it away, did you?'

'It's in the wardrobe in a box. I would never throw your cap away...I think you like it more than you like me!'

'Well...' John opened the wardrobe and took the box out. 'She's been with me since I was a lad...as young as William I reckon. I've always had a big head,' he teased her, placing his old cap on the chair where he was laying all his clothes for the next morning.

'You cheeky devil,' she rolled her eyes.

'Should I wear a waistcoat?'

'And a bowler,' Anna added.

'I am wearing my cap, Anna.'

'With that suit? A cap?' Anna twisted her nose at him.

'A waistcoat then...'

'And the overcoat,' she insisted.

John sighed desperately. 'I will take all morning to dress.'

'I will help you. Now come to bed, John.' She flashed her lashes at him and he had to chuckled.

'You are a temptress, Mrs Bates,' he joined her, sitting up against the headboard. 'Remember when I told you Mr Travis didn't like me?' he said, playing with the locks of her hair.

'I do.'

'Well...it's even more than that. He hates me!' His hand ran tenderly along her jaw now. 'I went to the kitchen and he was there. I asked him if I could have some water and he looked away...pretended I wasn't there.'

'Did he really? That's absurd! I will talk to him.' Anna was incensed.

'There's no need...he'll get used to me. I shouldn't be in the kitchen anyway, should I?'

'It's your house, John. You are the one paying them from now own, you can go, be, do whatever you want here. They have to respect you.'

'The maids do...and the cook. They are nice.'

Anna smiled mischievously. 'That's because they are women...they fancy you.'

'Anna!' John rolled his eyes. 'You are impossible, sometimes.'

'I do love you so very much, you know.' she said, taking his face in her hands.

He chuckled at her. 'And I love you.'

As soon as he replied she sat astride him. 'I never thought I was going to use this bed with my husband, you know...' she bit her lower lip as her hands travelled over his chest.

'Well...we haven't really used it, yet,' he said, lifting his arms as she helped him out of his nightshirt.

'No...' her mouth kissed every inch of his neck and he could only moan at her ministrations.

'When I met you,' he began, as she continued to roam his body with her hands. 'You were wearing a dress just like the one you wore today...brighter though, and I thought then that I had never seen such beautiful creature before.' He gasped, shutting his eyes as her hands reached the hem of his bottoms. 'I thought that you couldn't be more beautiful than you already were... but I was mistaken. You are the most beautiful wearing nothing but that ring around your neck.'

Anna laughed at his words, and she looked into his eyes. They were dark with passion and raw lust and the sight sent shivers down her spine. The way he looked at her like this, was always enough to excite her, and there wasn't much he had to do, once he was ready to take her. 'There was something you wanted to tell me...' she ran her hands through his hair, his hardness pulsing against her, beneath the fabric of his trousers.

'Nevermind that now,' he took her mouth in a fervent kiss. His hands now traveling down her back until he reach the top of her bottocks. 'Now, I need you.'

XXXXXX

'Elsa?' William's voice was heard in the middle of the night, a candle in his hand to bright up the way and his young cousin following just behind. 'Are you awake?' he opened the door to the girls room, peeking inside with the candlelight.

'William? Is that you?' she whispered back, sitting up on bed.

'Yes, it's me.'

'What are you doing here?' the girl asked.

'William was afraid because the room is way too big for the two of us.' George answered to his sister and he got an elbow in his chest from his cousin in return.

'That's a pack of bloody, filthy lies, George. I'm not afraid of anything!'

'Sushhhh,' Elsa warned. 'Mary's sleeping.'

'Do you suppose we can sleep here with you?' William asked her, his voice low again as the two boys made it to the edge of her bed.

'Why do you want to sleep here then? If you aren't afraid...' Elsa countered.

'It's called habituation, Elsa...' her cousin replied. 'Pa tells us our bedtime stories in the library or whatever room that is...' he shrugged his shoulders. 'There are so many I've forgotten its name. The point is...you can't hear a bedtime story out of bed, that's no bedtime story at all.'

'That's a librarytime story,' George remarked.

'Exactly. That's a librarytime story, Elsa. How are we suppose to sleep when the bedtime story is a librarytime story? We have all those stairs to climb...even if we are about to drop dead...all those stairs make us wide awake.'

'That's true,' Elsa agreed.

William continued, 'Well then, I've got a wonderful idea, as I usually do... if we sleep here all together, Pa can tell us our bedtime story here. I reckon the problem is that we all sleep in pairs and he doesn't want to tell his stories twice a night. Honestly...I can't blame him.'

'That's a brilliant idea, William!' Elsa whispered quite excitedly. 'And then,' she continued with a cheeky smile on her face. 'Every time there's thunder storm I can hold your hand to soothe your fears away.'

William rolled his eyes exasperatedly. 'Listen, George, if there's something I know about girls is that they will trick you into some dodgy facts until you find yourself believing...that's why I said I was afraid...she's been pestering me so much, I really thought I was.'

'Jump in bed, will you now?' Elsa said quite impatient. 'Maybe you can tells us another story.'

'Yes, William! Tell us another story!' the boys jumped in bed and they placed themselves at each side of the girl. 'Not a Dracula one though...' George pleaded.

'I shall tell you a story about werewolves then.'

'How's that less scary than Dracula?' Elsa asked, snuggling against the boys.

'It's not, but I've never told you this one.'

'What if Mary awakes and she hears it? Isn't she too little for horror stories?' George pouted, trying to persuade his cousin to change his mind, and his sister wrapped her arm around his shoulders.

'Mary's my sister, you silly.' William rolled his eyes. 'She'll beg for horror stories at breakfast! Now...there was once a woman who mothered a werewolf, but she wouldn't know about it until he bit off her hand...'

XXXXXX

When John left for the meeting that morning, his cap was hiding on his pocket and a bowler hat was sitting proudly atop his head. Anna never knew the exact answer as to why he had changed his mind, but she felt that what he wanted was to present himself just right, just proper. Deep inside, her so humble husband, let for once his pride and vanity show through his fancy clothes, and for that she was proud. He did look like a fancy gentleman now, even a Lord or a Duke. Ever so tall in all his rough glory, a sight for all those ladies walking on the street who suffered from rather sore eyes. John had always known how to present himself at the same level as rich man, and now, he could safely say he was one of them. Only those who knew him from the streets knew that this charming man had once wore rags for clothes...those who didn't know him, would never even imagine such thing.

When they arrived home later, not much before dinner time, Charles burst into the house with enthusiasm written on his face. _'Your husband is a sharp dealer, Anna. A true business man! We've got deals for payments, and all partners are quite excited to start working with us!'_

After the young lawyer's words, cheers and enthusiastic speech, Anna was left almost in tears. The pride she felt for her husband was overwhelming, and she could see by the smirk on John's face that he was as proud of himself too, and that was what made her truly happy.

That night, they went to bed rather late. Charles stayed for dinner and they all spent the evening talking about the new business' they had in hand. That night also, William explained to his parents that sleeping all in the same room would be easier for the bedtime story, and of course John had to agree with his son. That same night, they moved one bed from the boy's room and placed it beside Elsa's, and for now it would do; they wouldn't stay for long anyway, not in that house...for their life was about to change, once again and once for all.

_'When is a child no longer a child, ma?'_ William would ask Anna, in ten years time.

_'You tell me, William, do you know you are going to die one day? Do you know that will come a day that all that you are will end and there's nothing you can do about it?_

_'I am not going to die, ma. I will live forever!'_

Anna would sigh with a bright smile on her lips. Her hands coming to rub her swollen stomach, as the last of her biological children moved inside her, and the marks on her knuckles of a so much different time of her life now barely visible. _'In your case, I'm afraid you'll never know.'_

And they both would be right. William Bates would never grow up, not quite like the others. He would never know how to be an adult. Some would call him an eccentric man, others would say that, like all writers, he lacked a bit of sanity, but he would have his children and his dear wife, and like John, he would be an example of a loving husband and doting father, and he would also live forever. Through their books, writers never really die. Not quite like the others.

* * *

_**Next Chapter:** John and Charles work together as the family business prospers. Meanwhile Mrs Smith and Anna meet for one last time, before the family decide to start a new life in a more suitable place. _

**_Thank you for reading :)_**


	24. Chapter 24

_**A/N: **Final chapter my friends! This has been such a great journey for me, as I feel that I learned so much as a writer. _

_As you may know I have other ideas in progress but this fic will always be a favourite of mine. It was so fun to write and to share with you all. I want to thank you, readers, for your reviews, favourites and follows, you have always been so kind to me :) It means so much for us writers to have your support and to know it. Every review is like a beautiful fluffy kitten (or puppy if you prefer), and they really are what keep us writing. So don't you flinch when you want to post a review, even if you think it's short or meh. Don't you ever flinch! All reviews are great reviews, and we appreciate the time you take to write them :) it means so much to us! _

_AND a super, special THANK YOU to my wonderful beta **TerrieJane**! She has the patience of a saint and she rocks my socks all damn time. Every beta should be as fierce and good as her, just saying. _

And don't forget! There will be an Epilogue ;)

Hope you enjoy this final chapter.

_**Disclaimer: Same as chapter 1-23. **_

* * *

All eyes were on him. Eyes that once looked at him in friendly manner, now were scared, worried, curious. Would this new status change his ways, his feelings, his heart? That was the question that lingered in everyone's mind as John walked through the factory, lead by Charles.

For the first time in his life, he was there as a master. New clothes and clean face, his old cap atop his head, maybe to remind him and everyone else that inside, he was still the same man. But still, people wondered if new fortune would make him a new and less just man. And the answer was no. It wouldn't. John Bates was true to himself, he always would be. True to his ideals and battles in his past, and now that he was in a position to change the tides with a snap of his fingers, he would.

He climbed the stairs that lead to what was now his office door and stopped. Taking a deep breath and nodding at the young lawyer, he turned to the crowd of people who continued to stare at him from below, and he spoke.

'My friends...I'm here today as the owner of this factory and as your employer, and I want you to know that I will strive to keep fighting for your rights in the best way I can. I was there with you once and I know precisely what you ask for, your needs and your complaints, and as I demanded justice then, I will work for it now. Nothing will change my ways. You have my word.'

There was silence after he spoke, and some whispers between people, but a moment after Lenny stepped from the crowd, with a wide smile on his face.

'Welcome back, John Bates!' he shouted, bringing his fist up in the air in a show of solidarity, and persuading others to join him. 'There's no one else's word we trust more than yours!' The crowd erupted in cheers after that, and hope was revived in everyone's eyes.

Everyone's but Thomas.

The keeper was watching everything from a darkened spot on the landing. The same spot from which he would shout and humiliate people every day. John looked at him, and Thomas' eyes found the floor almost immediately, his jaw was clenched, and memories of that night seeped into his mind. The night, but for Anna, he almost killed John Bates.

Now in his office, John stood, facing the master's desk. The chair that had belonged to Mr Smith, and the place where he had been called to account for his actions so many times.

'You can sit down, Mr Bates,' Charles told him, gesturing towards the chair with a smile on his face.

John only nodded.

'I want you to demote Mr Barrow from his position. Put him lining cotton or something else...maybe carrying the loads,' he said, looking around.

'Mr Barrow? Why?' Charles asked.

'He was one of the men who tried to kill me...Mrs Smith paid him to.'

'Good God, I never!' Charles brought one hand to his chest in shock. 'Are you sure?'

'Yes, I am,' John sighed. 'Anna saw him...Can you do that?'

'But...demote him? After what he did? Why don't you sack him at once and present-'

'No! I don't anyone to lose their job.'

'He tried to kill you,' Charles reasoned.

'He was paid to do so. Probably much more than his monthly earnings… Life has made him bitter, but sacking him wouldn't do anyone any good. And then...' John took a deep breath, '...everyone deserves a second chance. Carrying loads like the others will put him in his place, at least I hope.'

'If you wish…' the lawyer nodded, but he was surprised at John's decision. 'Who's to be the keeper then?'

'Lenny, Lenny Fox. He's the right man for the job.'

'Alright,' Charles took a small notebook from his pocket and began to write. 'What else?'

'I want you to help me with...I want to be a fair employer, above all...I remember when I worked here. People work too much and earn too little, I want to change that.'

'Alright, but, we have to go easy on that...changes are made step by step. We need to go over the books and see what can be changed and what can not...we will get there, and that's why I am here.'

John nodded and only then he sat down in the chair, taking a deep breath as he did so. On the desk there were papers and books, fountain pens and an ink pot, and a photograph of Anna. That made him smile as he traced the frame's glass.

'It was inside a drawer, I thought you would like having it there,' Charles remarked.

'I do...very much.' The woman who changed his life forever, more than he could possibly have imagined. 'I do.'

A few weeks later, Anna found herself visiting her husband after the work had been done. She knew he would stay until later that day, for a meeting with some of his new partners, and she thought it would be nice to surprise him. It was funny, she thought, to visit him here now, to know that he would be working not in the factory, but in an office as the boss over all. Everything here was his, and she was now the wife of a very wealthy man.

'Hello Lenny.' Anna announced her presence with a smile as the new keeper finished his last tasks for the day.

'Mrs Bates!' he looked at her in surprise. 'Good afternoon.'

'Do you know if Mr Bates is done?' she asked him.

'Not yet. I don't think they'll be long though,' the man smiled. 'I should go home...if you don't need me?'

'Go home, Lenny. I'll be fine.' Anna smiled back at him, and he left, closing the factory's heavy door with a loud bang.

That door that closed on her dress those years ago and that led to hers and John's first meeting. Anna smiled at the thought. How could an inanimate object have such a tremendous influence in one's life, to the point of changing it completely? She wandered around the empty building then, memories rushing through her mind.

Being there always made her think. Think of everything that could have happened instead...after all, this place had saved her…

'Are you waiting for your husband?'

That voice...that voice made her shiver and turn around abruptly. Was she dreaming?

From the darkness of the corridors filled with machinery, Mrs Smith figure began to take form, as she approached Anna slowly, heavily. 'I've heard he's in a meeting with new partners.'

'Yes, he is, and yes, I am waiting for him,' Anna replied, swallowing hard. 'And you? What are you doing here?' She tried her best to sound defiant. She would not be afraid any longer.

'I don't know...' the older woman looked around herself, crossing her arms over her black dress. 'I suppose I came to say goodbye.'

'Goodbye?'

'You won...I have no place here.'

Anna shook her head. 'We were not at war. There's no victory between us.'

'Isn't there?' Mrs Smith lifted her chin. Her impressive arrogance still there...remains of what she was once. 'You have all of this now...you married a nobody and in the end you've became the mistress.'

'He's someone enough for my father to think he would do a good job as the master of his business'.'

'Well, I see that he's paying them for no job done.' Mrs Smith spat bitterly.

'They work one hour less than they used to, and they are treated as people...maybe that's the biggest difference,' Anna replied with some revolt.

'You may not believe it, but I raised you with the best of intentions to have a good life. A life worth of a lady that I turned you into. If you are all this that you are now, it was thanks to me. I taught you all those words you speak.'

'You just didn't teach me the value of every soul. Rich or poor. That I should speak to them, to everyone equally. You told me about morality but in your house there were two bastards. Two children you never loved.' Anna stated bitterly.

'What are you saying?' Mrs Smith eyed her with unsure eyes.

'Edward wasn't your son. His mother was a prostitute. I know it now.'

The older woman looked down at her feet nodding, her lips pursed and a hard expression on her face.

But Anna's coldness could never last for long. She would break with kindness and forgiveness even to those who didn't deserve it. 'I know that life wasn't easy for you...you married so young and your husband never respected you...having to name children that weren't your own.'

Mrs Smith tried to avoid Anna's gaze, for she didn't want to show her emotional side. Not to her. She was not known as an emotional woman, and she didn't want anyone to know that behind her façade there was a soul, a heart. That many a night she had cried, heartbroken and alone in her bed. That in those early years of her arranged marriage she had tried to earn the love of her husband. That she had waited for him so many nights, and that the only thing she wanted was to give him a child. No, she wouldn't let Anna know of this...not when she, herself, tried to forget everything about that past.

'I am going to my sister's house. I won't bother you anymore,' she said at last.

And with all Anna's strength, she reached for her crossed hands, and looked deep in the eyes of the woman who had caused her so much pain, the woman who had paid for her husband's death. 'Your place is where you want to be...we have a house in Kensington, you can stay there, if you want.'

'I saw your daughter the other day, when you were at the park...' Mrs Smith said. 'Elsie was there too...the child is beautiful...I have no place here,' she insisted, and with that she stepped back from Anna's touch and faced her for a few more seconds before leaving.

'You made your choice, Mrs Smith...many years ago,' Anna told her as she walked away.

'And I shall pay for that.'

That would be the last time Anna would see the woman who had been her mother during her younger years. Mrs Smith had been of the highest ranking in London society once, but she would die alone. Death would claim her not a month after their final encounter, actually, she would call on Death herself. Slowly, frightened, and in tears she would call Death and beg it to take her. So the Reaper did as she commanded. Her body would be found on the gravel, beneath her opened bedroom window. She left this earth with only her sister to cry for her at her funeral.

The letter with the news would arrive two weeks after the incident, and Anna would weep for her. She would weep because Mrs Smith had never been happy, and mostly because she thought that one day, maybe, she could visit her and forgive. The visit wouldn't happen, but with the passing years, Anna stopped thinking of her with rancour. After all, Mrs Smith had been right. She did pay for everything that she did, and for those like Anna, who believed in God and the afterlife, Mrs Smith would be punished for all eternity.

But eternity is not something the living have, not in their bodily life. And with the passing of time, there was still something missing in their lives. Something that needed to be changed before it was too late. Life's too precious to waste in a place where the dark memories of the past still haunt your dreams.

The business was prospering. Factories down South and one in Scotland. New businesses in the textile sector, now that new industries were beginning to grow. The children had a tutor and all of them were learning new subjects. Mary was sixteen months and walking, playing with her dolls and adventuring in the garden.

It was June again, and Anna sat in the grass beside Mary, contemplating life.

The three older children were riding their bicycles, and the little girl was eager to join them.

'You can't go play with them, my darling...you are too little for those monkeys,' she chuckled.

'Monkeys...indeed!'

Her husband's voice came from behind her, putting a broad smile on her lips. 'You are early!'

'I thought it was a wonderful day to go to the park...' he kneeled down to kiss the crown of her head. 'What do you think? Until dinner?'

The children came running towards them, cheering at his invitation.

'Yes! I want to go feed the ducks! Can we feed the ducks, uncle?' George jumped up and down in excitement.

'Of course we can. Go ask Mrs Gail for some bread, quick!' John smiled at his nephew. 'And you, son? Can you fetch the pram for Mary?'

'Yes, pa!'

'Come here you chick.' John took Mary in his arms, standing up, and kissing the girl's cheek. 'You are growing up too fast.'

'She is...' Anna stood from the grass.

John pinched the girl's button nose gently. 'Remember when her hair was black? She's so blonde now, and she has your eyes.'

'But everything else is yours, and she couldn't be more perfect.'

John nodded, smiling and beaming with pride. Indeed Mary looked like him, and honestly, she couldn't be more lovely.

In the park, they sat on benches, the weather was almost too perfect, and William took Mary in his arms before joining his cousins in the feeding of the ducks. The little girl seemed to enjoy every moment, laughing hysterically every time a duck bit into a piece of bread.

'Be careful, William! Not too close to the water.' John warned his son.

'Don't worry. There's no one better to take care of Mary than William.' Anna smiled over at the children. 'He'll be a wonderful father one day,' and John nodded at her words, turning to stare at her.

'You're staring, Mr Bates,' she shot him an innocent look.

'I can't help it...' he told her. His eyes were unable to look away. 'I want to kiss you.'

'Well...no one is stopping you.'

John grinned widely before taking her face between his hands and kissing her lips chastely. They were in public after all. These fancy ladies and gentlemen didn't like displays of affection in the middle of the park, or anywhere else really.

When they broke apart, they returned to watching the children as they now played together on the grass. Mary seated and the other three trying to make her laugh with all sorts of flailing around.

'You know...' Anna broke the silence, as she noticed his usual quietness of late. 'You still grow terribly silent sometimes...I wonder if you are sad.'

'Sad? How could I be sad when I have all this?' he gestured towards her and the children.

'But you are not happy, are you? Not truly. I see it every morning when you dress for work. There's...' she looked ahead trying to think of the perfect word to use. 'A longing...a lacking. Somehow...at times, you are not yourself.'

John shook his head trying to diminished her worrying, but she was right, and he knew it. He grew quiet again, looking up at the trees, only to feel her gaze on him. He looked at her then, and gave her a small smile.

'I just...I don't know what's wrong,' he expressed, whispering.

'I'm starving!' William ran back to them with Elsa following, carrying Mary in her arms and George right behind her.

'Let's go then,' Anna said rising from the bench. 'Mrs Gail must be finishing dinner by now anyway, and you all know she hates when were are late.'

They all laugh and she looked at John as he took Mary in his arms. She laced her arm around his free one, squeezing it slightly as she did so, and he knew that that night he would have to talk to her. Honestly, and tell her what was in his heart.

Later that evening, he was sitting on their bed thinking. Her words were echoing in his mind. He tried to comprehend what was happening, what he was feeling, and when she came from the washroom he got up, walked towards her and took her hands in his.

'Am I your John like this, Anna? Because... I don't think I am.' His eyes were pleading and his voice low.

'What?' His words confused her.

'I wasn't made for suits and ties, or for mighty houses with endless rooms. I was made for a simple life, and you were too...you are not your true self here either...and you know it.' His words made her tremble and she breathed in… 'What you told me earlier, you told yourself as well. You feel the same, I can see it in your eyes. They have never lied to me.'

Anna shook herself then, trying to keep from crying. 'I want to leave this house, John,' and with that she fell into his chest.

John's arms closed around her and a relieved sigh escaped from his lips. 'Tell me what you want.'

'This house...I don't like this house. I want to go up North.' She looked up at him, continuing. 'We have a farm up in Yorkshire. I believe we can be happier there.'

They smiled at each other, as if the weight of the world had just been lifted from their shoulders. This house. This house wasn't theirs, it would never be. This house was where she had been a prisoner, and this city where everyone judged them. Expensive dresses and headpieces were not what she wanted now, actually, she hated them. She didn't know it until she got back to them: tight corsets and many layers. No. That was not her anymore. She was Mrs Bates now.

And once again Anna would be right.

In that country house up in a cozy village in Yorkshire , they would find the peaceful life they desired. The space and lifestyle to raise their children. A simpler, humbler life than the one they found in London. Neither had been born for society rankings and tea parties. They had been born for family, and love and each other. For lazy days reading around the hearth, as the snow drifted outside, and for long walks on lazy summer afternoons. They liked to sit in the grass and look toward the horizon, talking about everything and nothing. They were lovers who travelled through waves of golden fields, holding hands and smiling contentedly, with bold touches as they let themselves roll through the grass and wildflowers as if they were nothing but children.

They left Charles in London, taking care of their businesses during the week. John decided to go to London every other weekend, or when it would be really needed, and the young lawyer promised to keep honesty in his work. He would have the help of two other lawyers that he knew were good and trustworthy.

Charles Johnson became John Bates' right hand. The man who once was promised to Anna was now their most faithful of friends. He would marry years later, to a young wealthy woman, and have two children and a mansion downtown. He would have a very happy marriage and life. After all, he had learned from the experts.

Mrs Oliver would live long enough to raise Thelma's boys until adult age, with the monetary help given by Anna and John every month, and Tim and Ben would become good employees in their cotton factory in London.

As for Maggie, no one saw her ever again, since the day she told the truth to John. Some said she moved down South to seek a better life, others that either she was dead or she had fallen into some dubious workhouse. Anyway, no one cared too much, and then, why would they? She had no one to miss her neither had she done good to people...but she would live in the tales of the family, in those late nights gathering around the fireplace where they would share stories of their earlier days. She would live there, yes, as would everyone else who had played a part in Anna and John's life.

Elsie, of course, moved with them up North, to a life she had always dreamed of. She saw her grandchildren grow, and she even saw Mary wed, but she wouldn't witness much more than that. She was old when she died, claiming she had lived more than enough. More than enough to get her life and her family back, and to hear her daughter call her mother as she always wished for.

And when the train announced its departure, heading to that village that would become their home, a new life began for all of them. A life that would last them until their final days.

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_**Epilogue:** We find Anna and John two yeas later, enjoying their life in the countryside. _

**_Thank you for reading :)_**


	25. Epilogue

_**A/N:** Here we go, the Epilogue! A little scene in the future of the Bates Family, two years after the last chapter. I hope you enjoy it!_

_Once again, thank you all for your support! And a super huge big THANK YOU to **Terriejane**, my wonderful beta, friend and counsellor :D_

_See you all soon, in my next fic :) Wish you a grand weekend!_

_**Disclaimer:** Same as chapter 1-24_

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It was the summer of 1856. Anna and John strolled hand in hand through the golden fields. The sun was shining and there was little breeze against their skin, as they talked about everything and nothing.

'And you are going in the morning then?' she asked him, her free hand swinging between flowers and tall grass.

'Yes, but I should be home Sunday afternoon. You know the less I am in London the better. It's getting more crowded by the day.'

'Good...neither of us like when you are away for too long.'

'Especially you?' he winked. 'You do hate to sleep alone.'

Anna nodded, letting out a long sigh. 'I just hate when you are away, that's all,'

'Love, we are signing a new contract with folks from America, I need to be going there until it's official,' he said, wrapping his arm around her shoulders and kissing her temple. 'It won't be long.'

'I think you should tell Charles to take a rest from finding new partners for a while. At least for now...''

John grinned, rounding her and taking her face between his hands. 'I'll let him know when I'm there... I won't be leaving your side after this one, I promise.'

Anna smiled at him then, as one of his hands travelled down her body to caress her stomach gently. Soon she would be showing and personally he couldn't wait for it. To experience everything again, to see her body change with the development of their child, to see her being a mother again.

Anna had told him the news a few weeks ago, when she was finally sure that she was indeed with child, and he couldn't have been more happy about it. They were certainly not expecting another baby, but then, they weren't being careful either, quite the opposite. Even so, he honestly thought that Mary would be the last of his children. But Anna always surprised him in the best possible ways.

Now, he couldn't wait to tell the whole family about their new addition, and he couldn't wait to hold that second baby of theirs in his arms.

'I will miss you, as I always do,' he finally said, his thoughts filling him with overwhelming joy, as he took her in his arms, sweeping her off her feet and kissing her passionately.

She giggled happily against his lips. But soon he lost his balance, and they both landed on the ground amongst the grass and wildflowers.

'You silly beggar,' she told him, smacking his shoulder.

'Are you alright?' he asked, worried at first, but her laughs put him at ease. Anna had fallen on top of him after all. 'I know you like to lay down on the grass,' he tried to excuse himself with a cheeky smile.

'I really do...' she whispered. 'And I am more than alright.'

She smiled down at him, as she caressed his face. As impossible as it seemed, she adored him more with each day. He had always given her everything she ever wanted, everything she always dreamed off, and now, he had done it again.

Her eyes were teary as he kissed her lips once more. Feelings washed over her, and soon all time was forgotten. No words were needed when they were together like this, nature surrounding them and unconditional love. This time was theirs now, and this place was perfect for life to happen, and they were certain that these days of sunshine and warm embraces would last all their lives.

Hours later, just as the sun was setting, they arrived back at home to a dinner Elsie had prepared. Anna's mother did the cooking now, a task she enjoyed and her daughter helped her out too, now and then.

'I almost sent William to look after you two,' her mother told them as Anna helped her set the table.

'We lost all notion of time,' Anna replied with a grin.

'As you often do,' Elsie winked over at her.

'Papa, look! I made you a drawing.' Mary ran to John with the paper in her hands. She had painted her father, in a brown suit and a cap, long legs and arms as long as his body. 'It's you!'

'Oh look!' John lifted the girl in his arms, looking at the his picture. 'It does look like me! You even drew my big head,' he smiled, kissing the girl's cheek.

'William said I am going to be an artist!' Mary told her father as she looked over at her beloved brother. The boy who always did whatever she wanted.

'Well, I only said the truth. She's rather good, isn't she, pa?' William bragged on her.

'Indeed, she is, son.' John smiled, patting William's head with his free hand. 'You go wash your hands now, all of you. Dinner is about to be served,' he said, putting Mary on the floor, and watching as she ran behind the other children. She was growing up so fast, so smart, and sometimes he missed the tiny baby she had been. He sighed happily then, tears wetting his lashes as he thought about the new baby that would join them in the beginning of the next year.

'Elsie taught me how to plait today,' Elsa said at dinner. 'Soon, I'll be able to make a proper dress!'

'That's exciting!' Anna exclaimed, enthusiastic. 'We are going to have a seamstress in our house.'

'She's doing so well,' Elsie complimented the girl. 'She will be a very good one.'

'I will make dresses for Mary then, when I know how to. And for our dolls as well!'

'What about us?' William asked his cousin.

'Well...I didn't know you wanted me to make you a dress,' Elsa said, playfully.

'Not a dress!' her cousin rolled his eyes. 'A suit.'

'I will be a seamstress, William. I will dress ladies, not gentlemen. You have to go to a tailor for suits.' Elsa answered.

'Maybe George should be a tailor then,' William suggested.

'Why me?!' George asked rather upset with the prospect.

'There's a writer, me, there's a seamstress, there's an artist, and then you could be a tailor.' William reasoned.

'Well, I won't be no tailor...I'll be here, and I'll feed the sheep.' George replied, looking at his uncle for approval.

'You can be whatever you want to be, George,' John said. 'A farmer is just as noble as a tailor, if you do it well and with passion.'

The younger boy nodded then, smiling victoriously.

'Well...' Anna began, taking a deep breath. 'Maybe, who knows, there will be a tailor after all, I mean...possibly.'

John looked at her grinning, as everyone else was now quite confused. The news she was about to tell, would take all the others by surprise and send the children over the edge. But that wouldn't be the last time a baby would be announced. That would happen again, in some years time.

Mary would be their only girl, blonde with blue eyes and her father's gift of speech. Their first boy another perfect mix of both, but their last, the spitting image of John; dark hair, hazel eyes, broad structure, a good and successful businessman.

Looking back at the beginning of their story together, life seemed almost unbelievable. How so much can happen in so little time. How can people change so much, and how some never change at all. They were the masters now, owners of successful enterprises, and just like any business, life is unpredictable, and one's destiny may be harder to achieve, but in the end, with strength, forgiveness and wisdom, there comes prosperity and, above all, a happy ending to all those who believed.

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_**Thank you all so much for reading! :D **_


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